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October 23, 2017, 04:55:04 AM
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Rev. Powell
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« Reply #10680 on: September 30, 2017, 08:19:18 AM »

ROFFTRAX: SUPERARGO & THE FACELESS GIANTS: A wacky Italian wrestling superhero with psychic powers and a (fairly worthless) swami sidekick. This movie would have been a good fit on MST3K. The riffing is standard but not exceptional; they make fun of Superago's costume and the fact that the "faceless giants" are, in fact, normal-sized actors with faces. A decent night's entertainment. 3/5.
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"Clive [Barker]'s idea of a great time is to have a nightmare about a woman with three heads and no skin who flays your body with a pitchfork. To give you some idea, NIGHTBREED has over 200 pus monsters, including one guy with a crescent moonhead like the McDonald's commercial and a fat guy with snakes that pop out of his stomach and eat your face off, and these are the GOOD GUYS. These are the people we're supposed to LIKE."-Joe Bob on NIGHTBREED
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« Reply #10681 on: September 30, 2017, 12:12:39 PM »

ROFFTRAX: SUPERARGO & THE FACELESS GIANTS: A wacky Italian wrestling superhero with psychic powers and a (fairly worthless) swami sidekick. This movie would have been a good fit on MST3K. The riffing is standard but not exceptional; they make fun of Superago's costume and the fact that the "faceless giants" are, in fact, normal-sized actors with faces. A decent night's entertainment. 3/5.

That's actually the second Superargo movie that was made. The original, SUPERARGO VS. DIABOLICUS, was a much better movie. It was more James Bond with a touch of superhero stuff added. Plus, it married the wrestling/spy/superhero genres into one fairly fun movie.
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Rev. Powell
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« Reply #10682 on: September 30, 2017, 03:18:28 PM »

ROFFTRAX: SUPERARGO & THE FACELESS GIANTS: A wacky Italian wrestling superhero with psychic powers and a (fairly worthless) swami sidekick. This movie would have been a good fit on MST3K. The riffing is standard but not exceptional; they make fun of Superago's costume and the fact that the "faceless giants" are, in fact, normal-sized actors with faces. A decent night's entertainment. 3/5.

That's actually the second Superargo movie that was made. The original, SUPERARGO VS. DIABOLICUS, was a much better movie. It was more James Bond with a touch of superhero stuff added. Plus, it married the wrestling/spy/superhero genres into one fairly fun movie.

They actually mention Diabolicus in this movie, like we're supposed to know who the hell he is.
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"Clive [Barker]'s idea of a great time is to have a nightmare about a woman with three heads and no skin who flays your body with a pitchfork. To give you some idea, NIGHTBREED has over 200 pus monsters, including one guy with a crescent moonhead like the McDonald's commercial and a fat guy with snakes that pop out of his stomach and eat your face off, and these are the GOOD GUYS. These are the people we're supposed to LIKE."-Joe Bob on NIGHTBREED
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« Reply #10683 on: September 30, 2017, 03:47:12 PM »

WHO KILLED CAPTAIN ALEX, Uganda's first action flick and it's a film that you really can't laugh at since it laughs with you through out it. Probably my favorite film that I've seen this year.

FOODFIGHT!, the 3D abomination that I kinda like. Unlike other animated garbage that I viewed, Foodfight is serviceable, unlike Garzey's Wings.
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yeah no.
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« Reply #10684 on: October 01, 2017, 09:09:54 AM »

IT COMES AT NIGHT -

OK, the first rule of making a post-zombie apocalypse movie is that, at some point, it actually NEEDS TO HAVE FREAKIN' ZOMBIES IN IT!   This is a well-acted but glacially paced drama involving a family of survivors that decides to take in another family of survivors, but then paranoia sets in, and someone may or may not be infected with the zombie virus, and shootings break out . . . but no zombies, no example ever depicted of what it is they are so afraid of becoming!  Seriously, this COULD have been a good movie with a bit more action or explanation . . . but instead it was a long, draggy story with no real sense of menace.  3/5
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« Reply #10685 on: October 01, 2017, 10:42:17 AM »

"Rogue One: A Star Wars Story" (2016)

Second viewing of the prequel detailing the Rebellion's mission to steal the top secret plans to the Death Star.

There doesn't seem to be much middle ground on this one; Star Wars fanboys either loved this one or hated it. Put me in the "loved it" column.
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« Reply #10686 on: October 01, 2017, 11:11:56 AM »

GHAJINI (2008): A CEO suffers short-term memory loss and, following notes he leaves for himself and clues he tattoos on his body, swears revenge on the gangster who killed his fiancee. Yep, it's a crude, plot hole-filled Bollywood ripoff of MEMENTO, only this time the victim knows kung fu, and there's about an hours' worth of flashbacks done in the style of a sappy romantic comedy---right up until the part where the female love interest is brutally murdered. Brace yourself so you don't get whiplash from the tone shifts in this bizarrely popular 3 hour confection. 2/5.
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"Clive [Barker]'s idea of a great time is to have a nightmare about a woman with three heads and no skin who flays your body with a pitchfork. To give you some idea, NIGHTBREED has over 200 pus monsters, including one guy with a crescent moonhead like the McDonald's commercial and a fat guy with snakes that pop out of his stomach and eat your face off, and these are the GOOD GUYS. These are the people we're supposed to LIKE."-Joe Bob on NIGHTBREED
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« Reply #10687 on: October 02, 2017, 07:59:54 AM »

"Spectre" (2015)
007 finally learns the source of all the trouble in his professional and personal lives - a shadowy terror organization called SPECTRE - in Daniel Craig's 4th turn as James Bond. This was my 2nd viewing of "Spectre" and although I enjoyed it to some extent, I think this it may be my least fave of the Craig era. Visually it's a flashy treat as always, but it runs WAY too damn long and is not nearly as good as the preceding "Skyfall."  
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« Reply #10688 on: October 02, 2017, 09:14:45 PM »

"Godzilla: Final Wars" (2004)
An alien race known as the "Xillians" has invaded Earth and assumed control of all of its giant monsters ... except The Big G, of course. While Godzilla battles his way through his rogues' gallery of past enemies on the ground, a team of elite super-powered "Earth Defense Force" agents take on the aliens in the sky.
This 50th anniversary Godzilla flick is ridiculously overstuffed (there's enough characters and plot for about twelve movies) and it features a variety of flashy special FX (incl. the classic guy-in-rubber-suit stuff, some CGI, fancy 360-degree slo-mo ala "The Matrix," etc.) and tons of action. It barely makes a lick of sense but boy is it fun to watch.
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« Reply #10689 on: October 02, 2017, 11:42:59 PM »

from my October Horror viewings. Inspired by a drive-in newspaper ad triple feature from 1980.

Don't Go Near the Park (1979)

Confusing zero budget Fantasy Horror about cursed siblings banned from a cannibalistic tribe. They must wander the earth for 12000 years and feed on children to obtain their youth. In order to lift the curse they must sacrifice a virgin child of their own at a very specific time.

So you get a young Linnea Quigley having a shower scene, a magic glowing amulet, guts ripped apart, a street wise runaway kid, attempted rape in a VW van with red plush interior, zombies, and laserbeams shooting from eyes. There's some marijuana smoking in the film which explains a lot. Rating: a half star out of five (failure)

Don't Go in the House (1979)

A man obsessed with burning things BBQs young women in his Bates-like Psycho house where he has conversations with his dead mother.

Grisly shocker and interesting character study of a serial killer. This is a Quentin Tarantino fave and it is actually not too bad. Rating: 2.5/5 (flawed but worthy)

Don't Answer the Phone! (1980)

A sadistic rapist serial killer turns his attention to a radio psychologist with two investigating cops in hot pursuit.

This movie is racist and misogynistic filled with seedy sleaze. In other words, they don't make 'em like this anymore. If anything, I liked the huge billboard for the Bee Gees 1979 album "Spirits Having Flown" seen in the background in one scene. Rating: 1.5/5 (regrettable)
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« Reply #10690 on: October 03, 2017, 08:57:08 AM »

WR: MYSTERIES OF THE ORGANISM (1971): It begins as a documentary about quack psychotherapist William Reich, who thought he might be an alien, proposed "orgasm" therapy, and was prosecuted by the FDA for quackery for his "orgone accumulator" machines (which he claimed could cure cancer and control the weather). It quickly dissolves into a random collection of (sometimes explicit) documentary scenes with a transsexual, a dildo sculptor, a trip to "Screw" magazine, interwoven with a fictional story a free-love Yugoslavian girl who seduces a Soviet dancer. A trippy Eurohippy time capsule celebrating the sexual revolution and suggesting free love inspired anarchism will replace both capitalism and Communism; how firmly director Dusan (SWEET MOVIE) Makavejev's tongue was in his cheek is still up for debate.  3.5/5.
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"Clive [Barker]'s idea of a great time is to have a nightmare about a woman with three heads and no skin who flays your body with a pitchfork. To give you some idea, NIGHTBREED has over 200 pus monsters, including one guy with a crescent moonhead like the McDonald's commercial and a fat guy with snakes that pop out of his stomach and eat your face off, and these are the GOOD GUYS. These are the people we're supposed to LIKE."-Joe Bob on NIGHTBREED
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« Reply #10691 on: October 03, 2017, 09:41:23 PM »

SIX FEET BELOW HELL - I have seen good zombie movies and bad zombie movies and unspeakably awful zombie movies, but this may be the worst zombie movie of ALL TIME.  Avoid this plague at all costs!  I couldn't even make it to the end.  I tried, but my eyes were melting in their sockets and my brains were leaking out my ears.  AVOID!  SAVE YOURSELVES!
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« Reply #10692 on: October 04, 2017, 09:47:11 PM »

The Crater Lake Monster (1977) - A fallen meteor breeds a dinosaur and locals ain't too happy about it. Crown International movie that is a chore to sit through, even though it covers most of the basics of exploitation cinema - including a decapitated head, a violent scene of a bloody robbery somehow tied into the plot, a stop motion creature and two dumb buddies acting silly for comic relief. Rating: 0/5 (atrocity)

The Giant Spider Invasion (1975) - A fallen meteor causes a spider to grow to gigantic proportions and locals ain't too happy about it. Notorious Bill Rebane drive-in trash that actually was a box office hit back in the day. Lots of spider webs and spider attacks, a strange farm family and plenty of scientific babble. The giant spider is a volkswagen made up as the spider, with the car's headlights posing for its eyes. Rating: 0/5 (atrocity)

Bug (1975) - Earthquake spits out prehistoric blind bugs able to set things on fire while feeding on ash. And yes, locals ain't too happy about this either. Bad animals attack/disaster flick from Paramount that has its share of unintentional humor. I do like when things turn into madness in the final half. Plenty of wtf? moments, but its still not good. Rating: 2/5 (disappointing)
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« Reply #10693 on: October 04, 2017, 10:07:55 PM »

"Curtains" (1983)
A group of actresses gathers at a director's secluded country estate in order to audition for his new film. Soon a masked killer starts whittling down the competitors one by one. 
This slow moving, rather dull slasher/mystery takes way too long to get the body count moving. I'm told that it has something of a cult following nowadays, but it didn't do much for me. Skip it.
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« Reply #10694 on: October 06, 2017, 07:45:05 AM »

"Tales of Halloween" (2015)
This fun horror anthology film ala "Creepshow" or "Trick r' Treat" features ten fast, funny, tongue-in-cheek scary stories that all take place in the same small town on Halloween night. Segments include a jack o'lantern with an appetite, a Leatherface-style murderer who meets his match, and a kidnapping scheme that goes horribly wrong.
Not every story is a home run but there was more than enough good, gory fun here to keep me entertained.
Sharp eyed horror nerds will get an extra kick from spotting B-movie royalty like Adrienne ("The Fog") Barbeau, Barry "Rocky Horror" Bostwick, Barbara "Re-Animator" Crampton and directors John Landis and Joe Dante throughout the film. A pleasant surprise. Thumbs up!
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