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Latest Member: moreotter Forum  |  Information Exchange  |  Movie Reviews  |  Submitted Reader Reviews  |  Crazy Fat Ethel 2 « previous next »
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Author Topic: Crazy Fat Ethel 2  (Read 2661 times)
Tyler M
« on: December 01, 2008, 09:28:04 PM »

Crazy Fat Ethel 2
Rated: R
Copyright IMRI productions 1987
Submitted by Tyler M/ Gorosaurus101

The Characters

Ethel - It's never a good idea to interfere with what she eats.

Mrs. Bartholemew - Runs the Bartholemew House.  She is quite possibly the world's worst actress (although there is a lot of competition in this movie).

Detective Sgt - Wife killer and shape shifter (see first film).

Greg - Misunderstood genius.  His spider senses are amazing!

Mushroom Head - This guy can really pack away the chocolate.

Lessons Learned

Never get between a fatty and their food.

When you live in Bartholemew Halls, there is no need to ever change clothes.

Flies make great seasoning.

Don't blackmail fat people with their desserts.

It's not as easy as you would think to elude a morbidly obese middle aged psycho woman.

Drapery cords make a workable hangman's noose.

Conversations about the temperature of tea can go on for eons, but you'd better drink the tea while explaining how hot you like it, or it will get cold before you even sip it.

You can fool psychos into gobbling up canned dog food if you tell them that it is corned beef hash.

Proper etiquette dictates that chocolate bars are to be savored while holding the bar delicately with your pinky held aloft.

Despite what you'd think, fat people really do enjoy clear broth, dry saltines, and apples.

Dog food and rat poison labels on containers are VERY obvious to avoid confusion.

Stuff to watch for

9 seconds - Dejavu on the beginning credits.
2 minutes 30 seconds - GRATUITOUS CHEWING
4 minutes - The pudding is gone!
9 minutes 1 second - MINDLESS STARE
9 minutes 53 seconds - Are you sure that's the same person?
11 minutes - MINDLESS STARE
16 minutes 26 seconds - Is that guy spiderman?
17 minutes 37 seconds - MINDLESS STARE OVER BROTH
19 minutes 58 seconds - Spiderman likes flies in his soup.
22 minutes 28 seconds - That phone cord isn't attached to anything.
23 minutes 24 seconds - Waltzing for insects in the front yard.
25 minutes 16 seconds - Longest scene of scooping dog food onto plates in film history.
28 minutes 27 seconds - GRATUITOUS CHEWING OF CANDY BAR
32 minutes 56 seconds - I'm gonna lasso me a mushroom head!
36 minutes 12 seconds - MORE MINDLESS STARING
44 minutes 58 seconds - Pause to take a bite of your apple in between stabs.
50 minutes - Is this a horror movie or a game of musical chairs??!!!
52 minutes 4 seconds - Ethel performs airplane ballet for invisible audience.
56 minutes 30 seconds - Is that the sound of human strangulation or rabid dogs in heat?

Notable quotes

Granny - "When you learn not to stuff yourself, you can use the icebox again."

Detective Sgt - "Come on down Greg, I have some of that special seasoning you like." (sprinkle flies on soup)

Ethel - "I don't want any damn pills, I want a snack Granny!"

Mushroom Head - "This chocolate bar sure is good.  It tastes all chocolatey and sweet inside!"

Lieutenant Harris - "Accident?  Lady, that man was hung!!"

Lieutenant Harris - "I am Lieutenant Frank Harris, San Francisco Police Department, HOE-MOE-cide division."

Detective Sgt - "I'm not going to tell that cop nothing, but you're going to give me your desserts for the next month."

The Plot

Ethel Janowski is released from the mental institution to live in a halfway house due to budget cuts.  The name of the house is Bartholemew Halls, where the employees and patients alike are severely cranially challenged.  Ethel's favorite passtimes during her stay include eating, staring into space, eating, dancing, eating, laughing for no apparent reason, and murdering for munchies.  She also has flashbacks to the first film which encompass half of the movie.  After everyone in the house is killed, Ethel pretends to be the owner of Bartholemew Halls and greets new patients as they arrive.
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« Reply #1 on: December 01, 2008, 09:42:23 PM »

just incase no one new i posted this and forgot to sign in :)
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