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November 16, 2018, 07:03:12 AM
609982 Posts in 47094 Topics by 6271 Members
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Badmovies.org Forum  |  Other Topics  |  Off Topic Discussion  |  I Love Big Brother « previous next »
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Author Topic: I Love Big Brother  (Read 181 times)
Bad Penny
Frightening Fanatic of Horrible Cinema
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The world becomes a dream....


« on: September 07, 2018, 10:57:39 AM »

As I sat in the psychologist’s office yesterday I thought, you know, I really should learn to BS better.

Although I can kid around and satirize things and maybe bedevil others for fun and profit---none of you know that part I’m sure---I am, believe it or not, a sincere type person, pretty honest, utterly vulnerable in many ways, deeply invested in my family and those I love, and when I say something it is usually how I feel and I can be expansive when it’s not always in my best interests to be. (Gee, could this be one of those times?)

I can even sort of put my head on the chopping block and hand others an ax, but only when I trust that person, with that august group of ax-holders probably numbering about ten right now, including one or two who may not always have my best interests at heart, but hey, what’s life without a little danger? Besides I figure the headless look is overdue for a comeback ever since that original fashion diva Marie Antoinette started it in the 1790s.

But I was talking about embracing bovine scatology, not metaphorical decapitation, wasn’t I?

Take yesterday. I had to go see the psychologist my employer has everyone go to regularly for evaluations with our at times high-stress job, and owing to blahblahblah, last month I played by the rules and self-reported about my overreaction to a security breach incident and because I was so foolishly candid about it I got sent in to see the psychologist weekly for six weeks instead of monthly like most of us, owing to their sincere conviction that I have "multiple source PTSD" with my overreaction being a manifestation of that.

(Total bunk, I don't and I'm not saying that to sidestep reality, because PTSD exists, I've seen its effects, I don't downplay it, I just don't think I fit the diagnosis, but these days psychologists are gung-ho on saying practically everyone has it so they can have job security and also prevent people from having road rage and depression and whacking their sleeping families with baseball bats.)

I was told, "We cannot allow you not to access treatment when we've learned how destructive PTSD can be when left alone."

I countered with: “What if my behavior is a completely normal reaction to a life filled with abnormal challenges?”

“And what if it’s not?”

“And maybe that fault for some of the stress is just a little bit you guys, y’think? Would you say my life is typical? Normal, even?"

“No, and that’s why we’re reaching out to you and we appreciate your full cooperation.”

So I went yesterday, it’s free and I even get comp’d travel time, gas, wear and tear on my tires, get doctor’s excuses for my other work if I ever need them, gee, can’t be much more accommodating, I confess, and I sat there for forty-eight minutes and answered the usual questions and told her, no I haven't been eating much lately, no I haven't been sleeping much lately, no, I did not take the pain meds after my skin cancer surgery (if surgery you want to dub something so minor) because the pain kind of felt...healthy or something, no I have not severed any friendships, and yes, I did just miss being at ground zero for a mass shooting by minutes which is a little unsettling in a wow sort of way but I can't say it's traumatizing me, and yes my friends and family have noted personality and behavior changes in me over the last two weeks but you'd think they'd know me well enough to know that's normal for a half Irish chick with a gift for finding sadness in rainbows and who grew up being told she was descended from fairy folk. Not a recipe for well-adjusted normality even before you guys threw your wormwood into the mix when I was a mere seventeen years old. :-)

I knew I was creating such a train wreck with my honesty I laughed a little and she was sitting there typing furiously and I said, "Everything I tell you you tell our employer, don't you? None of this is in any way confidential, is it?"

She said, "You know you were fully briefed on the disclosure forms you signed."

Yep, I sure was, no arguments there, I might as well have been writing all this into my file myself. She's there for them, not me. It is just funny sometimes how telling the truth is not always the best way to go, and I thought what if instead of absolute honesty I was sitting there bee-essing my way through stories of a perfect life complete with long dreamless sleeps and three meals a day and friends who said my temperament never varied?

I doubt she’d have believed me.

I asked then what she thought, because am I right that if someone is there to evaluate you, it's not entirely out of bounds to ask for, well, an evaluation, is it?

She said I was fine.

I stopped dead and said, "Fine?"

She said, "Yes, I have not picked up anything to worry about except I do think maybe your sleeplessness could be connected to your not eating, since blood sugar and sleep are tied, but I also know it's been noted for years that not eating is one of your first and strongest responses to stress, and you've had a lot of stress lately."

I was like, "What? Really? You're...not hanging me out to dry?"

She seemed gratifyingly puzzled and said, "Not at all, these sessions have been for you, not to try to trap you or blame you, they're to give you an outlet not to be used against you. We’re not going to be part of creating a problem and then step away from it."

I asked, "So...you're saying you think I'm actually doing all right?"

"Yes. You’re doing all right. I’m pleased."

"And I'm not setting off all your alarm bells and red flags?"

"No."

"What about this 'multiple source PTSD' diagnosis?"

"I concur with that but that doesn’t mean you’re severely mentally unwell, only reacting to traumas and handling them well, from what I hear. I do recommend continuing these sessions but I think you should know you're handling things well."

Gee and gosh-golly!

I couldn’t quite believe I was hearing this so I asked, "Are you just saying that to keep me calm until the guys in the clean white suits arrive with their straitjacket?"

Anyway, long story short, it seems I am actually handling the stresses associated with my life well according to her, I even got it in writing, ha, so now I feel like that psychologist is a genius and I must add her to my Christmas card list.

There you go, friends, I am the perfect picture of sanity, and yes, that’s pretty darned scary to me too.

Logged

"If I should meet thee after long years,

How shall I greet thee? With silence, and tears."

--Lord Byron
Dark Alex
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« Reply #1 on: September 07, 2018, 12:09:07 PM »

I can sympathise with that reaction. It was fairly shocking to me when my happy pill nurse told me that I was doing amazingly well and in fact couldn't quite understand how I had been able to carry on in any regard as a functional human being, so congratulations on being diagnosed as not as crazy as you thought you were. You should ask them to put that on a certificate for you.

Oh, will we be seeing you at the annual serial killers annon dinner next month? I've already accepted my invite.  TongueOut
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There is a secret song at the center of the world, Joey, and its sound is like razors through flesh.
Bad Penny
Frightening Fanatic of Horrible Cinema
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Karma: 839
Posts: 5543


The world becomes a dream....


« Reply #2 on: September 07, 2018, 12:13:28 PM »

You know it! I heard a rumor that the Corinthian is going to replace the Family Man as speaker this year!
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"If I should meet thee after long years,

How shall I greet thee? With silence, and tears."

--Lord Byron
Dark Alex
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Karma: 449
Posts: 3290



« Reply #3 on: September 07, 2018, 12:37:02 PM »

Big fan of his work, although I wouldn't like to clean up after him.
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There is a secret song at the center of the world, Joey, and its sound is like razors through flesh.
indianasmith
Archeologist, Theologian, Elder Scrolls Addict, and a
B-Movie Kraken
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Karma: 1947
Posts: 12047


A good bad movie is like popcorn for the soul!


« Reply #4 on: September 07, 2018, 09:57:00 PM »

Glad you got a good report.
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"Carpe diem!" - Seize the day!  "Carpe per diem!" - Seize the daily living allowance! "Carpe carp!" - Seize the fish!
"Carpe Ngo Diem!" - Seize the South Vietnamese Dictator!
AoTFan
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« Reply #5 on: September 07, 2018, 10:40:42 PM »

Well, gee, I feel stupid now, I thought you were talking about the TV show...
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Bad Penny
Frightening Fanatic of Horrible Cinema
****

Karma: 839
Posts: 5543


The world becomes a dream....


« Reply #6 on: September 08, 2018, 11:12:34 AM »

Well, gee, I feel stupid now, I thought you were talking about the TV show...
Nah, 1984 reference. Inside joke.
Logged

"If I should meet thee after long years,

How shall I greet thee? With silence, and tears."

--Lord Byron
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