Information Exchange => Reader Comments => Topic started by: Super saiyan jedi on November 25, 2006, 04:09:03 PM

Title: Sextette
Post by: Super saiyan jedi on November 25, 2006, 04:09:03 PM
If you tried to toss this movie into a bottomless pit, it probably would get tossed right back at you.

Title: Sextette
Post by: Simon Withington on November 25, 2006, 04:09:49 PM
Some movies are so bad they're good.
I love this movie.
If you love high camp - this is the film for you.

Title: Sextette
Post by: Michael Corda on November 25, 2006, 04:09:49 PM
How much cocaine can movie makers consume to compell them to make this drivel?Don't get me wrong...I love it.It's like a horrible car wreck you rubberneck at.When Marlo wore the WHITE! wedding dress and looked like the Cryptkeepers uglier and OOOLDER relative,I ran screaming into the street and almost got hit by a bus.Rumor has it she was actually dead and propped up with a broomhandle.Use your imagination...I lived the sheer hell of this movie myself in a way.My grandmother looked and acted just like Marlo.I have doomed genes.

Title: Sextette
Post by: The Driver on November 25, 2006, 04:09:49 PM
You've done nothing to prove to me that Mae West is an actress.  However, we now have photographic evidence that Timothy Dalton, Dom Delouise, and George Hamilton are all oscar-class actors.  

After all, they're all in this movie, they're all supposed to be in love with Mae West, and they're all clearly <i>smiling</i>...

Title: Sextette
Post by: Brian Lindsey on November 25, 2006, 04:09:03 PM
Jesus H. Christ.

Honest-to-God nightmare fuel.

Title: Sextette
Post by: Steve on November 25, 2006, 04:09:49 PM
Pass that bloody barf-bucket! My flabber was well and truly gasted when I had the awful experience of seeing this many moons ago (I must have been in an altered state). I thought no-one could be so sadistic as to unleash this upon an unsuspecting world - Andrew, you're damned forever.

Title: Sextette
Post by: Patrick T on November 25, 2006, 04:09:49 PM
Uh...OH GOD NO!  SOMEBODY MAKE IT STOP! PLEASE, FOR THE LOVE OF ALL THAT'S HOLY IN THE WORLD, STOP THE MOVIE!! *this is where I run screaming into the street*

Title: Sextette
Post by: Bill D Cat on November 25, 2006, 04:09:49 PM
ARRGH!!!  I clicked on the video!!  With sound!!!!


Now I'm going to need to sue for mental anguish!!!

Title: Sextette
Post by: Green Hornet on November 25, 2006, 04:09:49 PM
Sad realy. She could have pulled off the sexpot act at fifty, MAYBE fiftyfive. But's just sad.

Title: Sextette
Post by: Spazztica, Queen of Hyperia on November 25, 2006, 04:09:49 PM
Some Hollywood sicko must have been really freakin' bored. Why must there be an 85-year-old slut? Why must anyone sing about it? Please beat me over the head many times with a skillet should I ever wish to see this movie.

Title: Sextette
Post by: Butt Monkey on December 27, 2001, 12:09:15 AM
People seem to like to s**t on this movie, but I thought it was a delightful comedic romp with the sexy Mae West. When Mae West first caressed those majestic, gargantuan 85-year old saggy tits of hers, I felt like making sweet love to her all over her body. First I would touch her gigantic loins and then... (Post interupted as I descend back into the depths of hell)

Title: Sextette
Post by: Josie on November 25, 2006, 04:09:49 PM
I have a story I'd like to share:

Upon reading the one-line summary on the reviews page, my first thought was 'male chauvinist pig... Sean Connery's at least 80, and he's sexier now than he ever was as James Bond.'  I mentioned this is a friend of mine, also a bad movie fan, who agreed with me, and we set out to find a copy of the movie so that unbiased (read: female) eyes could take a look at it.

Hooo, boy, were we sorry.

Round about the time the gay guy showed up, we'd started to put together a theory.  This script must've been written for Ms. West while she was still young, and it was her baby the way 'Battlefield Earth' is John Travolta's.  For one reason or another, though, it failed to get funding and was set aside.

Then one day, some guy found it, dusted it off, and decided it had potential.  All he had to do, after all, was cast the right Marlo Manners and people would FLOCK to see it.  A sexy star is a proven way to save a lousy movie.  Go rent 'Entrapment' if you don't believe me.  So after many long weeks of tryouts, he finally found the perfect Marlo; a blonde bombshell just at the beginning of her movie career.  Never mind the fact that if THIS Marlo's on her seventh marriage, somewhere out there are six men who are guilty of statutory rape.  With her in the lead role, the movie's a sure winner.

Then Mae West found out about it.  Imagine John Travolta at eighty, having just been told that 'Battlefield Earth' is being filmed, and he isn't in it.

So Ms. West hatched an evil, grinchly plot.  She had the young star quietly murdered, then showed up at the studio with photographs of the director and said young lady doing things that the director's wife would be quite upset about.  The rest, as they say, is history.

That's our theory, anyway... it's the only way we can possibly imagine this movie having turned out the way it did.  And we take back all the pig stuff.

Title: Sextette
Post by: Henry on November 25, 2006, 04:10:12 PM
Normally, I'd say any film this hideous is a waste of time. However, as one of the most (if not THE most) stunning horror films of the century - this movie certainly hits the mark. Imagine a woman in her mid-eighties constantly tossing out outdated sexual inneundos and alluding to "hot" (make that "cold" - as in necrophilliac)sex with her mid-thirties co-star. Can't? I'm furiously trying not to, either. Add to this stultifying mix some not-to-be-believed "musical" numbers and, of course, the ever amazing Dom Deluise and you have a recipe guaranteed to keep you awake at nights for months to come. This movie has it all - a seriously embalmed Mae West, Regis Philbin (!), Ringo Starr, Alice Cooper (!!) and a sad host of other "stars" in some of the most embarrassing cameos since The Love Boat. I never thought "Love Will Keep Us Together" would actually send a chill up my spine. Trust me, Lovecraft was an amateur - you need to see this movie...

Title: Sextette
Post by: caro and rox on November 25, 2006, 04:09:49 PM
I think this movie has changed my life forever. It's much more staining to women than men. Words fail me. It's the most uncomfortable viewing experience of my entire life, yet sweetly and sadly gallant - all those hundreds of people constructing an elaborate lie, too nice to tell her that she was 91 years old.

Title: Sextette
Post by: Scott on November 25, 2006, 04:09:49 PM
This movie gave me ovarian cancer I think, which is pretty bad considering I am male.  After viewing this movie and crying in a corner for a week, I shared it with some friends on a weekly movie night we have.  Needless to say the Exorcist didn't get the screams of horror this movie did, people were literally hurting themselves.  MAE, we love you, even if you are dead.

Title: Sextette
Post by: Eric on November 25, 2006, 04:10:12 PM
I watched this move non-stop for 21 hours.

I really don't understand the people who think that Andrew being disgusted by an 87 year-old Mae West is chauvenistic or unfair. If women like seeing an 80 year-old Sean Connery, I'm fine with that. I don't say "ick" when women talk about Patrik Stewart or Harrison Ford, even though they're all senior citizens. But if I get disgusted by an 87 year-old woman acting like she's 30, that's my business. It seems to be the consensus of men that old women are NOT sexy. Why do people have such a problem with that? If I don't take issue at women liking old men, they shouldn't take issue with me NOT liking old women.

Title: Sextette
Post by: Mort on November 25, 2006, 04:09:49 PM
God...If I weren't already gay...this would definitely turn me.

Title: Sextette
Post by: steve eramo on November 25, 2006, 04:09:49 PM
why do i read warning lables and continue to do the things that i'm told not to do????

very clearly i was told to NOT click on the 'love will keep us together' clip.  but no.....i just HAD to see mae west and timothy dalton(how did he ever get to be james bond??) in what i assume was to be a duet.

well, i found out a few things:

1)animatronics are wonderful, i love how lifelike mae west looked.
2)timothy't sing to save his soul.
3)the pain in my eyes subsided once the ice pick was removed.
4)the webmaster is an evil, evil, twisted man.

may this film burn in hell, along with osama bin laden

Title: Sextette
Post by: Beeronius on April 24, 2003, 10:53:45 AM
Dear lord. My eyes burn from watching that clip...

Title: Sextette
Post by: Kaiomarz Bhada on November 25, 2006, 04:09:49 PM
This has to be the best movie I have ever seen! The song between Timothy Dalton and Mae West is the best coreographed piece of film ever! And Mae is the prettiest sh'e ever been! 85 year olds rock!

Title: Sextette
Post by: Miko Rittenberry on November 25, 2006, 04:09:03 PM
Lucifer himself could not create a horror of this magnitude.  I vaguely remember seeing this movie on cable a long time ago and it almost raped my childhood.  For the longest time, I swore that RED SONJA was the worst movie ever made... apparently, I had just successfully blocked this one from memory, only to have it brought back by this website.  Thanks.
Believe me, watching Dom DeLuise dance along to a cardboard cutout of Mae West might be the most f**king surreal thing anyone will ever see... *shudder*

Title: Sextette
Post by: Tom on November 25, 2006, 04:09:49 PM
This movie is gold..... I really LOVE it... it's so bad that it's good. Made my eyes water from laughing. Specially when you hear Mae's teeth smack up her gum! (I'll play the piana *smack*)

Title: Sextette
Post by: Trog on November 25, 2006, 04:10:12 PM
A masterpiece! Ranks in cinema history right up there with "Xanadu" and "Can't Stop the Music." A technological, directorial and performance achievement unequaled before or since.

The amazing Mae West, rumored at the time to be either 85 or 91, is utterly convincing. Ubiquitous use of state-of-the-art "Doris Day lenses" (pantyhose smeared with Vaseline and stretched over the camera) predate Industrial Light and Magic techniques by at least a decade.

So does the use of a wireless earpiece cleverly concealed in Miss West's wig so the director could feed her her lines. A huge advance over Marlon Brando's technique of hiding his lines on cards all over the set so he doesn't have to memorize them and they sound "fresh." Again, Miss West was far ahead of her time and displays an astonishing emotional range for which she was not well known.

One example: her reading of her line, "I'm the girl who works at Paramount all day and Fox all night." Audiences didn't know whether to laugh or cry, such was the rich emotional ambiguity of this, her crowning role. One appreciates her trail-blazing performance all the more when realizing that, though she had written this line for herself some fifty years earlier, it still sounds as fresh as if her director had just fed it to her through her earpiece.

And another thing. Michael Todd's cameo players in "Around the World in 80 Days" had nothing on "Sextette's" once-in-a-lifetime assemblage. Tony Curtis, Walter Pidgeon, Dom deLouise, Alice Cooper, Timothy Dalton, Regis Philbin, Tom Sellick -- all giving,er, standout performances, per Miss West's requirement -- plus an immortal musical score that ranges from the Captain and Tennille's "Love Will Keep Us Together" to the Beatles' "Honey Pie" -- well, there are no words.

If it's brilliant moviemaking you want; if it's comedy and heartbreak and thrilling music and choreography rolled into one (even dancing bellhops, like in Jerry Herman's "Hello, Dolly!" only this is different because those were waiters and these are bellhops!) don't hesitate to buy "Sextette." You'll regret it.

Title: Sextette
Post by: Steve Potts on November 25, 2006, 04:10:12 PM
Come on now,...everybody loves to crap on "Sextette", for all the WRONG reasons!  Its called a "farce", it was never ment to be taken seriously! Ms. West even said at the time that she made it 1978 that she did it "for her fans!"   What other star could pull something like this off at her age then?  Not Garbo, Swanson, or even Dietrich, who appeared briefly in Bowie's "Giggalo" 1976, looking great herself!

85 or 91, who cares! Mae West looks great in "Sextette" , no more than 65 or 70! She made this for her fans, so have a stiff drink, sit back & enjoy! There will never be anything like this made ever again in Hollywood, nor are there any legends left, the likes of Mae West!  

Title: Sextette
Post by: qygibo on November 25, 2006, 04:09:49 PM
If Mae West REALLY cared for her fans, she wouldn't have made that P.O.S. movie.....  it's shudderriffic!!!

Title: Sextette
Post by: Suz on November 25, 2006, 04:09:49 PM
I just watched the clip and cannot for the life of me imagine anyone watching the whole thing.

Dear sweet Lord.

Do you suppose it's a war crime to torture Saddam Hussein with this?  Because I really think he'd sing like a bird after a few hours of this.

Title: Sextette
Post by: bb6634 on November 25, 2006, 04:09:03 PM
(after watching the clip)
Oh God Oh God Oh Merciful God...  

Title: Sextette
Post by: hnybny on November 25, 2006, 04:09:49 PM
After hearing rumors of just how bad this movie was I saw the DVD for sale in a used rack for $3.99. I thought that this would be my chance to own a rarely seen 70's B-movie. This is not a B movie, this is at least a Q. What were they thinking, why? What the hell is Alice Cooper doing there??? Was he still an addcit then? Yes? Oh, that explains it.

Title: Sextette
Post by: Arm Commander on December 27, 2005, 09:52:53 AM
A masterpiece? More like a disasterpiece in my view. So, with the power of the Inferno invested on my D-Gun, I, the great and powerful Arm Commander punishes Sextette with a D-Gun blast. Your sexual days are now over. May the Great Gods stomp on your grave.

Title: Sextette
Post by: Hot Hunk on November 25, 2006, 04:09:49 PM
I don't understand the nasty comments here at all.  This movie is not bad.  Mae West did a fantastic job considering her age.  She was still glamourous, good looking and sexy!!  It is an injustice to attack this film just because of her age and I think all the nasty comments here show just how SICK and DEMENTED people are today.  These comments are nothing but age-prejudiced, horrendous words to be sure.  The only thing sick about this movie is the nasty, age-prejudiced comments about it!  God, how cruel and unfeeling can people get????

Title: Sextette
Post by: wagu39 on November 25, 2006, 04:09:49 PM
At first I didn't want to buy the movie [I read how bad it was], but after seeing the clip, I decide that I should have it. At least it will make me laugh.

Title: Re: Sextette
Post by: clockworkcanary on December 06, 2006, 02:51:29 PM
I'm still cracking up that Alice Cooper plays a waiter in this movie! (the last image on the review page!) hahahaah!

Title: Re: Sextette
Post by: Mrs Patrick Campbell on January 21, 2007, 02:19:05 PM
We LOVED this movie! Timothy is SO gorgeous - does Timothy have sizemeat? We are certain that Timothy is a homosexual, though she would probably become quite angry if told so. A sister we know was in the movie. She plays the BBC announceress.

Title: Re: Sextette
Post by: Ryan J. Kenner on July 30, 2007, 02:06:07 PM
The most disturbing thing is that you swear that Timothy Dalton is James Bond, sucking up to granny's fanny because he's trying to get the inside on some Russian terrorist group, only to find out half way that Dalton actually isn't on a mission and is actually serious in swooning over Mae West.  :bluesad:F

An extremely bad movie that is scarier than any horror movie ever made.

Title: Re: Sextette
Post by: Tsukasa Macleod on January 21, 2008, 06:59:08 PM
My dad always said that he looked like Timothy Dalton. After seeing this movie I never looked at him the same way again. This movie is so bad, that you could watch "Citizen Kane" "Godfather" "Casablanca" and "Seven Samurai" all together back to back afterwards, and it still wouldn't make up for it! BURN IN HELL MAE! 2 hours I could have spent watching something decent.

Title: Re: Sextette
Post by: kentme on May 26, 2009, 11:08:25 AM
I LOOOOOOVE this film!  It's so wonderfully terrible.  I haven't seen it in a few years, but reading about how horrible it is all is making me wonder why I haven't seen it lately. The "Love Will Keep Us Together" duet between Marlo and her husband is probably one of my Top Ten favorite moments in film HISTORY.  For real.  With gauze on the camera lens, the close-up of Mae when hubby sings, "Young and beautiful, your looks will never be gone" is classic...fuzzy, campy, bizarre, disturbing, charming...who could ask for anything more!!   I love it. I've hard many stories about the making of this film and all I can say is Thank God all of the producers and crew were all completely high at the time!  Viva La Sextette! :thumbup:

Title: Re: Sextette
Post by: Frank Mathieson on August 08, 2010, 04:15:21 PM
I love this film, not because it's good, but because it's terrible.  Although, that's a polite way of saying it.

Me and some friends found this on TV very late one night after we'd been out drinking - my god! it was the funiest thing we'd every seen!  We couldn't believe how many famous faces are in this thing.

Needless to say, I now have this on DVD and we've made a drinking-game out of it - face it, it's the only way you can watch this film.

Also, your review was hilarious.  I think I'll check out some of the other movies you hate!

Title: Re: Sextette
Post by: Russ Thorn on August 17, 2010, 12:02:01 PM
Haha, i recently got a blind box of ex-rentals, i had no idea what was in there and found this movie in the bottom. I had no idea what it was like but it must have been instinct and i turfed it, good move by the sound of it!

Title: Re: Sextette
Post by: Nick37 on March 05, 2013, 12:04:12 AM
Anyone questioning Timothy Dalton's acting ability or saying he shouldn't have been James Bond need only watch this picture and be proven wrong. Not only does he play the role with a straight face, He actually attempts to sing a love song to Mae West, which, if nothing else should earn him an honorary Oscar.

Looks like he perfected his camp style from this for 1980's "Flash Gordon", and thankfully was given a chance to clear his name by playing the darkest and grittiest Bond of all.