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Movies => Bad Movies => Topic started by: CoreyHeldpen on March 18, 2007, 12:22:16 AM



Title: Five Worst Movies You've Ever Had The Misfortune Of Watching
Post by: CoreyHeldpen on March 18, 2007, 12:22:16 AM
What would you honestly say the five absolute worst films you've ever had the displeasure of watching from beginning to end are?

Mine are:
5- Arachnia (Why did I hate this movie? It had all the stuff I love in a B-Movie in it, I should've loved it. So why don't I like it?)
4- Date Movie (What is this crap? No, really, what IS this CRAP?)
3- Spy Kids (And how did this get two sequels?)
2- Snakes On A Train (The Asylum is destroying itself with dull, cruddy rip-offs.)
1- The 13th Child: Legend Of The Jersey Devil (Poorly edited and directed, narrative that jumps all over the place, poor acting, cruddy effects, goofy monster, this movie just sucks.)



Title: Re: Five Worst Movies You've Ever Had The Misfortune Of Watching
Post by: Fausto on March 18, 2007, 01:54:13 AM
The 13th child was a pile of S***!!!!!! I went to see that in the theatres, and me and my friends spent the whole time trashing it, as that was the only way we could stay amused. It horrifies me to think that someone actually thought it was worthy of a theatrical release. You get applause for speaking the truth.  :buggedout:


Title: Re: Five Worst Movies You've Ever Had The Misfortune Of Watching
Post by: CoreyHeldpen on March 18, 2007, 02:07:31 AM
13th Child got released in theatres?! I thought it went straight to video.


Title: Re: Five Worst Movies You've Ever Had The Misfortune Of Watching
Post by: fortunato on March 18, 2007, 02:46:21 AM
The worst films I've ever seen (so bad that I've never watched them twice) are:

5:  National Lampoon's Senior Trip (No comedy was attempted in the making of this picture)
4:  Bad Moon (A werewolf movie that was lamer than most of its ilk)
3:  The Howling 4:  The Original Nightmare (The title says it all. It's more faithful to the novel, which is bad for us)
2:  One Missed Call (Takashi Miike's VERY Hollywood-esque ghost/slasher film, which gives it that Final Destination ripoff feel.)
1:  The Howling 3:  The Marsupials (Like we needed kangaroo-werewolves to give a "boost" to this series)


Title: Re: Five Worst Movies You've Ever Had The Misfortune Of Watching
Post by: quabrot on March 18, 2007, 03:17:34 AM
Date Movie-  Of all the pieces of crap I've seen, this may be the worst.
Alone in the Dark- The only Uwe Boll film that deserves the hatred.  I loved Bloodrayne, and got a lot of laughs out of House of the Dead.  This one was just boring.
Four Flies on Gray Velvet-  Dario Argento usually makes better movies, even when he makes bad ones.
Hunchback of Notre Dame 2- Disney's direct to video sequels are all pretty bad.  I would probably put this one at the bottom.
Frankenstein's Bloody Terror-  Paul Naschy's first werewolf movie.  I'm glad they decided to bring him back and make better movies.


I liked One Missed Call.  Pop J-horror with Miike's sadistic touch. 


Title: Re: Five Worst Movies You've Ever Had The Misfortune Of Watching
Post by: Kester Pelagius on March 18, 2007, 11:15:34 AM
They're not all going to be movies I watched in the theater but. . .

5. Robin Hood, Prince of Thieves
4. Waterworld (short version)
3. Abomination: The Evilmaker 2
2. Blood Slaves of the Vampire Wolf
1. Amityville (remake)*


(*) Actually this would probably be a tie for most of the remakes I've seen.  But that sprang to mind immediately as particularly odiferous.


Title: Re: Five Worst Movies You've Ever Had The Misfortune Of Watching
Post by: Scott on March 18, 2007, 11:45:58 AM
Battlefield Earth
Catwomen
Howard The Duck
The Rats Are Coming, The Werewolves Are Here !

Sorry, I could only come up with 4 films that were that bad. Usually I can find something in a film that I like. Actually the four above have at least one or two moments in each that are ok, but that doesn't make them movies.


Title: Re: Five Worst Movies You've Ever Had The Misfortune Of Watching
Post by: JaseSF on March 18, 2007, 12:00:30 PM
5) National Lampoon's Senoir Trip (ugh! Completely unfunny in the extreme. I had forgotten this until I saw this thread.)
4) The Wizard of Gore (Now most of H.G. Lewis' films I find to be hard slugging but this one took the cake for me. This incomprehensible mess is basically just an excuse to show new and inventive ways to showcase seemingly endless scenes featuring mutilation gore of hapless half-dressed females.)
3) Boogie Nights (Yes I hated it this much. Didn't think it was ever going to end when I originally watched it.)
2) Natural Born Killers (a mindlessly repetitive onslaught of violence with no real rhyme or reason to it.)
1) Armageddon (a complete waste of the acting talent. I don't know why they bothered to get any recognizable performers at all since all that seems to matter is the FX.)


Title: Re: Five Worst Movies You've Ever Had The Misfortune Of Watching
Post by: RCMerchant on March 18, 2007, 12:18:43 PM


4) The Wizard of Gore (Now most of H.G. Lewis' films I find to be hard slugging but this one took the cake for me. This incomprehensible mess is basically just an excuse to show new and inventive ways to showcase seemingly endless scenes featuring mutilation gore of hapless half-dressed females.)

[/quote]

Ok,those were it's good points...now the bad ones are...? :question:


Title: Re: Five Worst Movies You've Ever Had The Misfortune Of Watching
Post by: JaseSF on March 18, 2007, 12:25:31 PM
It's doesn't make much sense overall, the sound and acting are terrible and well I just don't care for gore movies that only has misogynist gore to claim as a redeeming feature I guess.


Title: Re: Five Worst Movies You've Ever Had The Misfortune Of Watching
Post by: RCMerchant on March 18, 2007, 12:33:57 PM
Actually,I agee.It was a pretty lousy movie,even for Lewis.Much more entertaining is 2000 MAINIACS,for the over the top hamminess and fun bluegrass music.


Title: Re: Five Worst Movies You've Ever Had The Misfortune Of Watching
Post by: BeyondTheGrave on March 18, 2007, 12:56:43 PM
5. Zombies Vs Vampires
4. Parasite Eve
3. Dark Water
2. City of Rott
1. The Raven


Title: Re: Five Worst Movies You've Ever Had The Misfortune Of Watching
Post by: JaseSF on March 18, 2007, 02:08:50 PM
2000 MANIACS is Lewis' best film by far IMO.


Title: Re: Five Worst Movies You've Ever Had The Misfortune Of Watching
Post by: peter johnson on March 19, 2007, 01:07:08 AM
So -- Movies with no virtue whatever?
Howard the Duck
The Valachi Papers
Equinox
Father of The Bride(Steve Martin remake)
Panic in The Year 3000
* * *
You may have not seen the last one listed here.  New Zealand film.  No budget.  Big screen.  Find it if you can . . .
* * *
love
peter j./denny c.


Title: Re: Five Worst Movies You've Ever Had The Misfortune Of Watching
Post by: Zapranoth on March 19, 2007, 03:20:04 AM
Treasure of the Four Crowns was pretty pointless.

Umm...   Shanghai Surprise.

Agree, Howard the Duck.

Star Trek:  Nemesis.   (aaaaaarrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrgh!)

I didn't watch Catwoman, nor did I watch Howling 3:  The Marsupials.   Just too darned painful to even contemplate.  But I'll bet either of them would be a shoo-in for slot 5 in my list.


Title: Re: Five Worst Movies You've Ever Had The Misfortune Of Watching
Post by: felgekarp on March 19, 2007, 06:39:08 AM
Scary Movie - I didn't find this at all funny I'm afraid.
Freddy's Dead: The Final Nightmare - This I did find funny, but for all the wrong reasons.
How To Get Ahead In Advertising - The only film I've ever fast forwarded to the end.
Eat the Rich - I never really got into any of The Comic Strip Presents stuff.

Do you know I really can't think of another one.


Title: Re: Five Worst Movies You've Ever Had The Misfortune Of Watching
Post by: Trevor on March 19, 2007, 07:11:45 AM
In South African terms:

5: A Dry White Season :hatred:
4: A World Apart  :hatred:
3: Bopha (what was Morgan Freeman thinking?)  :hatred:
2: Country of My Skull / In My Country  :hatred:
1: (Tie) Cry Freedomand Lethal Weapon 2 (I sort of liked these in their own crummy way)

Dishonourable mention:

Irreversible (I nearly threw up all over my brand new TV) :buggedout:



Title: Re: Five Worst Movies You've Ever Had The Misfortune Of Watching
Post by: Joe on March 19, 2007, 07:16:33 AM
1.The Jar
2.The Hitcher(remake)
3.BoogeyMan(remake)
4.Silent Hill
5.Silent Night Deadly Night Part 2



Title: Re: Five Worst Movies You've Ever Had The Misfortune Of Watching
Post by: Jack on March 19, 2007, 08:08:52 AM
5)  Anacondas:  Hunt for the Blood Orchid - the characters and plot were so cliched and banal that watching it was like enduring the Chinese water torture.
4)  Carnage:  The Legend of Quiltface - Definitely the cheapest, most ineffective, poorly acted, most dull piece of crap I've ever seen.
3)  Broken Skull - bottom of the barrel production values and characters that come and go in a never ending parade of "What the hell's going on?".
2)  Stick It - So annoying that it was a test of endurance to make it to the end even though I fast forwarded through nearly the entire thing.
1)  Death Tunnel - An entire movie edited like an MTV video, with barely a scene longer than a few seconds.  Acting was awful, the plot I've seen numerous times before but never done this poorly.  Utterly Wretched.


Title: Re: Five Worst Movies You've Ever Had The Misfortune Of Watching
Post by: The Burgomaster on March 19, 2007, 08:41:28 AM
I could probably write this list tomorrow and come up with 5 completely different movies, but here are a few that come to mind (in order, with #1 being the worst of the worst):

1.  DUNE - I saw this during its original theatrical run and it seemed like it would never end.  Painful.

2.  WIRED - The story of John Belushi based on the best selling book.  I rented it years ago when it came out on VHS.  I actually got a headache watching it.

3.  THE SICILIAN - Christopher Lambert as a Sicilian?  PLEASE.  Another movie that I saw during its original theatrical release and I couldn't WAIT for the end credits to start rolling.

4.  ROCKY IV - Dolph Lundgren, Brigitte Nielsen, and a talking robot.  Need I say more?

5.  JAWS 3-D - Smelled worse than rotten seafood.


Title: Re: Five Worst Movies You've Ever Had The Misfortune Of Watching
Post by: JaseSF on March 19, 2007, 10:24:19 AM
Hmm I'm surprised by some of these as I recall enjoying some of them. No they may not have been particularly good overall but I still felt Howard the Duck, Rocky IV, Jaws 3-D and Dune (I own those last three on DVD) all had their moments.


Title: Re: Five Worst Movies You've Ever Had The Misfortune Of Watching
Post by: ghouck on March 19, 2007, 02:32:22 PM
5. Golden Child
4. Moonstruck, ,, saw it in a theater,, not sure why. .
3. Coming to America
2. Twister

1. Chariots of Fire. . .Worst movie ever made IMO, , My father took myself, my sister, his then G/F and her son to see it, , ,the G/Fs daughter wasn't allowed to go , , SHE was being punished. . . I remember this movie being so bad I couldn't even fall asleep in the theater. Pretty bad when a movie sucks so bad the sound of it sucking keeps you awake. .

I'm sure there are more that would fit into the 2-5 range, , but I seem to be blocking them out. . .


Title: Re: Five Worst Movies You've Ever Had The Misfortune Of Watching
Post by: quabrot on March 19, 2007, 03:42:56 PM
I'm seeing alot of movies that I have enjoyed on these lists.  But the only one that I can really disagree with is Coming to America.  Coming to America was Eddie Murphy's last great comedy, before it all went the way of Pluto Nash and Norbit.


Title: Re: Five Worst Movies You've Ever Had The Misfortune Of Watching
Post by: KYGOTC on March 19, 2007, 04:57:04 PM
IN NO PARTICULAR ORDER.

bad b-movies
*Star Odyossey (I liked the robot boxing scene. Thats its only redeeming quality)

*Popeye: The Movie (why robin williams, WHY?!)

*The Skydivers (This one wasnt even good with the MST3K commentary)

*Manos Hand of Fate

*The Stuff


Bad a-movies
*Batman and Robin (.......oh, God, why? ........Why?)

*Pocohantis (the disney movie)

*My Big fat greek wedding

*ALL of the Saw movies

*The Ring 


Title: Re: Five Worst Movies You've Ever Had The Misfortune Of Watching
Post by: KYGOTC on March 19, 2007, 05:40:18 PM
What would you honestly say the five absolute worst films you've ever had the displeasure of watching from beginning to end are?


4- Date Movie (What is this crap? No, really, what IS this CRAP?)
3- Spy Kids (And how did this get two sequels?)
2- Snakes On A Train (The Asylum is destroying itself with dull, cruddy rip-offs.)


I also cant stand Date Movie. All of the movies that those guys have made suck. Not another teen movie, Epic movie, And all the scary movies blew, but i havent seen scary movie 3.

As for spy kids, I liked the first one, but its sequels sorked. As did Sharkboy And Lavagirl.


And does snakes on a train have any relation to Snakes on a  plane? Sound s interesting.


Title: Re: Five Worst Movies You've Ever Had The Misfortune Of Watching
Post by: RCMerchant on March 19, 2007, 06:11:47 PM
Worst A-Movies? Hmmm...I dunno about worst,but these come to mind..
1.KING KONG (1976) Whatta overhyped piece of crap! I wanted to spit at the screen!Even at the age of 14,I recognized its sh!ttiness!
2. the ROCKY HORROR PICTURE SHOW-I'm sorry...this is a personal worst list for me.Iv'e had to sit through this stoopid movie I-don't-know-how -many-times, to the point of pukeavomitousis!
3.GODZILLA-the AMERICAN version...blashphemous!!!!
4.ARMAGEDDON-I dunno why...it just irratated the hell outta me that the studio had the nerve to pass this garbage off as a serious movie!5.ME,MYSELF and IRENE-I rented this for me and the kids to watch on a Sunday after dinner...jeez! Not funny...just a crappy,long,dirty joke...
 Im' sure I can think of more big budget crap,but these came to mind first...


Title: Re: Five Worst Movies You've Ever Had The Misfortune Of Watching
Post by: KYGOTC on March 19, 2007, 06:17:34 PM
Worst A-Movies? Hmmm...I dunno about worst,but these come to mind..

2. the ROCKY HORROR PICTURE SHOW-I'm sorry...this is a personal worst list for me.Iv'e had to sit through this stoopid movie I-don't-know-how -many-times,
Is the ro ho pic sho overall concidered an A or a Bmovie? Ive seen it go both ways, and Im not sure what i would name it to be.


Title: Re: Five Worst Movies You've Ever Had The Misfortune Of Watching
Post by: SaintMort on March 20, 2007, 11:39:41 AM

I also cant stand Date Movie. All of the movies that those guys have made suck. Not another teen movie, Epic movie, And all the scary movies blew, but i havent seen scary movie 3.

And does snakes on a train have any relation to Snakes on a  plane? Sound s interesting.

Scary Movie 3 I enjoyed alot... I think it was because it was done by the people who did Naked Gun and the Kentucky Fried Movie and actually I quite enjoyed Not Another Teen movie. Snakes on a Train is a cash-in direct to video film released the same week Snakes on a plane was released in theaters.

as for my top 5 worst:
5. Blair Witch Project - I think of all the over-rated films in horror history this one takes the cake
4. Jaws of Death - An awful Jaws cash-in about a guy with a telepathic connection to his sharks... the box was about a thousand times more interesting than the movie
3. Hulk - Worst Comic Book Movie Ever
2. Garbage Pail Kids the Movie - So painful to sit through
1. Wolf Creek - The most upsetting film I've ever seen in the theater


Title: Re: Five Worst Movies You've Ever Had The Misfortune Of Watching
Post by: raj on March 20, 2007, 12:47:03 PM

Is the ro ho pic sho overall concidered an A or a Bmovie? Ive seen it go both ways, and Im not sure what i would name it to be.

I put it as a B.

My worst:
Dune -- incomprehensible mess of an incomprehensible book.
Air America -- ugh.
War of the Roses -- alleged black comedy that lacked comedy.
Prospero's Book -- has a naked John Geilgud in it -- the old version -- shudder.

Oh, I forgot:  Reign of Fire.  Um, youv'e been fighting dragons worldwide for a century, and there's still a military helicopter able to fly -- with special fuel -- and it can cross the Atlantic.  Now, I don't mind suspending disbelief, but do not abuse that privilege.


Title: Re: Five Worst Movies You've Ever Had The Misfortune Of Watching
Post by: peter johnson on March 23, 2007, 12:48:08 AM
Oh, Ha Ha Ha!!
Ain't Opinion fun??
     Personally, I found "Chariots of Fire" to be a grim study of human Ambition for Its Own Sake/a meditation on pursuit of Goal above all else.  The scene where the coach collapses and cries, though you know that's all against his entire raison d'erte, I found quite touching.
     But, yes, in all, minor and overrated film -- though I can turn on the TV right now and see any number of things worse than that!!
     "War of The Roses"-- Yes!! Never got the joke -- hated it from beginning to end!  A celebration of ugliness & without any comic relief -- Everyone dies at the end.  How funny . . .
     "Dune" I look upon as a failed masterpiece, sort of like Eric Von Stroheim's "Greed" -- In the first place, the book is quite fully realized -- Herbert's understanding of Mideastern Desert/Islamic cultures was decades ahead of its time in the West, and should be respected, I think.  Lynch had no real feeling for Science Fiction, but did his best to recreate the Spiritual aspects of the novel.  I would hope that this film would get a better reception 20 years from how -- Lynch is a man who works in lace when the script would sometimes demand concrete.  I cannot simply p**s on this film and wish it away . . .
Also, "Reign of Fire" had that great scene wherein the kids were being told the "Star Wars" story as if it were real myth, and you had those great scenes of dragons crawling like dismembered sea-creatures up to the Castle walls -- Well, never mind the logic, I still love the images.
You think "Reign of Fire" was worse than "Reptilicus"?
peter dragon/denny FXS



Title: Re: Five Worst Movies You've Ever Had The Misfortune Of Watching
Post by: Joe the Destroyer on March 23, 2007, 04:00:50 AM
Me, I'd have to say.


5. The Killing Birds- I actually hunted this movie after seeing the trailer, expecting your typical splatter flick, but instead got one of the worst zombie movies I'v ever seen.  The set up takes way, waaaay to long (hell, there's even a lame and pointless montage at one point in the set up with one fo the characters playing a harmonica, wtf!), and then when you get to the "action" all you see is one zombie running around killing people.  They try to make it seem like there are a bunch, but you can tell it's just the same person except in different shots because the make up is all the same for every zombie.  God, what an awful movie...

4. The Abomination- I think the creators were trying too hard to make this campy, because they actually succeeded only at making it crappy.  The monster looks like it's made of paper mache.  Let's not also forget the horrid acting, awful editing, craptacular cinematography, and scenes that seem like they were shot with a camcorder.  It gets an A for sucking. 

3. Zaat!- My biggest problem with this movie was sheer boredom!  Sure, the acting was bad and the plot a little too familiar, not to mention that there were many things that didn't make sense (spray bottle under water...).  The film all in all nearly put me to sleep. I had to force myself to finish it.

2. The Prey- Proof that some movies are better off as short films.  It essentially feels like the creators took a short, basic slasher flick set in the woods with a burnt gypsy as the antagonist and padded out the rest of the time with ass loads of nature footage from National Geographic and a few scenes of a ranger being a dumbass (i.e. telling jokes to animals, singing, etc.). 

1. Superbeast- Regardless as to what some have said of this film, I just can't stomach it.  It has to be one of the most boring films I've ever watched.  Only here can you watch someone investigate the forest in real time for about five f**king minutes!  Many of the scenes did not in any way feel useful to any kind of plot.  It just seemed to have that whole do-as-you-please feel to it.


Title: Re: Five Worst Movies You've Ever Had The Misfortune Of Watching
Post by: felgekarp on March 23, 2007, 05:31:55 AM
I really enjoyed Dune, Rocky IV and Popeye, I think Popeye's ace and Dune was the the film my mom took me to see before telling me she and my dad where getting divorced, so while it's not brilliant it was certainly the best thing that happened that day  :smile:


Title: Re: Five Worst Movies You've Ever Had The Misfortune Of Watching
Post by: inframan on March 23, 2007, 11:02:52 AM
Not a definitave list but here's some that come to mind:

zombie lake, just boring, not even a lake full of naked chicks could redeem this one.

the Doors I was just praying for Jim Morrison to die so the movie would end.

Godzilla Final Wars as a Kaiju fan I found this a huge disapointment

Cool as Ice not saying I didn't laugh at it but boy was it bad.

A.P.E. this one has some really funny scenes but some of it is kinda boring, and all of it is really bad. I got to see it in the theatre in 3-D.



Title: Re: Five Worst Movies You've Ever Had The Misfortune Of Watching
Post by: Raffine on March 23, 2007, 11:17:24 AM
Quote
A.P.E. this one has some really funny scenes but some of it is kinda boring, and all of it is really bad. I got to see it in the theatre in 3-D.

Is this the one where the giant M*O*N*K*E*Y fights the giant rubber shark?

Oh, God...


Title: Re: Five Worst Movies You've Ever Had The Misfortune Of Watching
Post by: inframan on March 23, 2007, 03:43:16 PM
Yeah but that shark didn't have much "fight" in it :lookingup:


Title: Re: Five Worst Movies You've Ever Had The Misfortune Of Watching
Post by: KYGOTC on March 23, 2007, 11:05:59 PM
has anyone ever seen "Sssssss"? I wonder if there is some bodily function in which one can REMOVE a memory from one's BRAINZ.


(http://www.vaiden.net/sssssss.jpg)


Title: Re: Five Worst Movies You've Ever Had The Misfortune Of Watching
Post by: Pilgermann on March 23, 2007, 11:24:34 PM
I love Rocky IV!  And I used to watch Popeye quite a bit when I was a kid, so I'm not sure how it'll hold up these days.


Title: Re: Five Worst Movies You've Ever Had The Misfortune Of Watching
Post by: fortunato on March 24, 2007, 02:18:54 AM
No better way for removing BRAINZ than playing some Satanic Rock 'n' Roll in a graveyard to wake up zombies. Either that or mention the name of He Who Must Not Be Named.


Title: Re: Five Worst Movies You've Ever Had The Misfortune Of Watching
Post by: RCMerchant on March 24, 2007, 07:14:40 AM
has anyone ever seen "Sssssss"? I wonder if there is some bodily function in which one can REMOVE a memory from one's BRAINZ.


([url]http://www.vaiden.net/sssssss.jpg[/url])


       I thought SSSSS... was HILAROUSLY bad!!!! Inna good "bad" way,not a bad,bad way! (?)


Title: Re: Five Worst Movies You've Ever Had The Misfortune Of Watching
Post by: Bilosh on March 24, 2007, 02:40:47 PM
5 worst movies coming to my mind would possibly be
5. The Wiz - African American remake of the wizard of Oz staring Michael Jackson and Diana Ross?
4. Glitter - Bad Acting Bad Plot Bad pretty much everything.
3. Gigli - an out of luck hitman and a lesbian hitwomen are hired to kidnap a mentally challenged kid cause Al Pacino in his typical Role is going on trial for something....
2. Landspeed - Billy Zane tests the limits of speed by trying to hit Mach 3 in a car. And his competition, they don't call him Stealth Steven for nothing.
1. The Brown Bunny - Hailed as the worst movie ever made, it got booed at the Cannes film festival, my friend made me watch it and I didn't know what i was getting myself into.  Albeit it was the DVD version, the original apparently had 30-40 minutes more of Content to the film.  No movie even comes close to how bad this one is, name any movie and this one is worse. 2 hours of driving on a highway and the climatic scene where he get's a blowjob from his ex girlfriend but she's not actually there which leads you to think, did he really get a blowjob?

honerable mentions go out to Ring of Darkness, Date Movie, and Kevin Costner.


Title: Re: Five Worst Movies You've Ever Had The Misfortune Of Watching
Post by: LilCerberus on March 25, 2007, 12:11:25 AM
 :bluesad: Ive been racking my brain for days, trying to remember what my old five used to be, but I can't stop thinking about how they were all replaced by that boxed set from the Polonia Brothers. :buggedout:

I mean, sure, I've seen stuff with lower production values, duller storylines, inepter acting, poorer editting, and un-specialler effects, but blaspheming the name of my favorite Roger Corman movie in order to draw attention to this crap has earned this five movie (actually, four & a short) boxed set a truly unique level of ire with me.  :hatred:


Title: Re: Five Worst Movies You've Ever Had The Misfortune Of Watching
Post by: Joe on March 26, 2007, 07:00:38 AM
I like SssssssssS , idk why i just do. they should re-make that, i bet it could be good if handled properly.


Title: Re: Five Worst Movies You've Ever Had The Misfortune Of Watching
Post by: Kooshmeister on March 26, 2007, 07:16:46 AM
I've seen my fair share of bad movies, but there are very few for which I can find absolutely no redeeming qualities whatsoever. Here's five of them, though.

1. Werewolf - Some archaeologists discover a werewolf skeleton which still has the power to bring the surce of lycanthropy down upon some unlucky schmoe of a writer. Features the most inept, unconvincing attack scene against the villain at the end.

2. King Dinosaur - Four astronauts are sent to a newly-discovered planet called Nova where they encounter giant lizards they claim to be dinosaurs. They then nuke them, and claim this is bringing "civilization" to Nova.

3. Agent For H.A.R.M. - Those evil Commies (at least I think they were supposed to be Soviets) are developing a new biological weapon made from space germs, so your average James Bond wannabe has to stop them. For an action movie, there's not a lot of action. The elderly scientist was more of a hero than the "secret agent."

4. Laserblast - Kid victimized by practically an entire town finds a discarded alien raygun that makes him drunk with power, and turns him into a green homicidal maniac with offscreen teleportation powers (witness him getting in front of the fleeing police officer despite the physical impossibility of it!).

5. Space Mutiny - Confusing, idiotic movie set aboard some random roaming spaceship where some guys are planning to stage a mutiny for some reason. The "hero" is a big muscleheaded moron who kills a helpless, disabled foe by immolating him.

Is it any surprise these are all Mystery Science Theater movies...?


Title: Re: Five Worst Movies You've Ever Had The Misfortune Of Watching
Post by: akiratubo on March 26, 2007, 09:47:51 PM
In no particular order:

The Matrix - so much wasted potential
Headless Eyes - ARRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRGH!
Exterminator 2 - Please stop ... please!
The Jar - *cries, hides in corner*
Hedwig and the Angry Inch - What the f**k is this s**t?

Honorable Mention:

Even Cowgirls Get the Blues


Title: Re: Five Worst Movies You've Ever Had The Misfortune Of Watching
Post by: Joe on March 27, 2007, 07:38:10 AM
ah i see someone else has had been through the torture that calls itslef "the jar". f**k that movie , seriously.


Title: Re: Five Worst Movies You've Ever Had The Misfortune Of Watching
Post by: Kester Pelagius on March 27, 2007, 07:34:34 PM
IN NO PARTICULAR ORDER.

bad b-movies
*Star Odyossey (I liked the robot boxing scene. Thats its only redeeming quality)


To be fair it you've seen it on DVD then you haven't really seen it.  As I point out in my review, which you can read here (http://blog.360.yahoo.com/blog-qzcELew6frWBZspks_7SsnUuv9VNTUA-?cq=1&p=147), it appears to be a very bad re-edit hack job.  Alas it's so hard to tell what the deal is with these old Alfonso Brescia titles (there's just no solid information on them) that I can't even begin to tell you for sure how the movie is supposed to play out.

Then again it's not like the other movies in the series were any better.  Though I suppose we could blame that on the dubbing.  ;)


Title: Re: Five Worst Movies You've Ever Had The Misfortune Of Watching
Post by: KYGOTC on March 27, 2007, 11:30:11 PM
IN NO PARTICULAR ORDER.

bad b-movies
*Star Odyossey (I liked the robot boxing scene. Thats its only redeeming quality)


To be fair it you've seen it on DVD then you haven't really seen it.  As I point out in my review, which you can read here ([url]http://blog.360.yahoo.com/blog-qzcELew6frWBZspks_7SsnUuv9VNTUA-?cq=1&p=147[/url]), it appears to be a very bad re-edit hack job.  Alas it's so hard to tell what the deal is with these old Alfonso Brescia titles (there's just no solid information on them) that I can't even begin to tell you for sure how the movie is supposed to play out.

Then again it's not like the other movies in the series were any better.  Though I suppose we could blame that on the dubbing.  ;)


why would they edit out stuff  for the dvd?


Title: Re: Five Worst Movies You've Ever Had The Misfortune Of Watching
Post by: ghouck on March 29, 2007, 02:30:33 PM
I liked War of teh Roses, , the first time I saw it, , it's definately not a re-watcher. I can't find any amusement in "Coming to America", , it just plays out so predictably, , and not well IMO. The Matrix: That's one of my favorite movies, the entire trilogy even.
I think the only reason I liked "War of the Roses" is because it made me think of "Ruthless People". .


Title: Re: Five Worst Movies You've Ever Had The Misfortune Of Watching
Post by: Kester Pelagius on March 30, 2007, 11:05:08 AM
why would they edit out stuff  for the dvd?


As I state above it appears to be a very bad re-edit/ hack job.  In short the DVD is unlicensed, meaning it's"PD wink wink, nudge nudge", so the source used was likely pretty shady to begin with.   I go into detail about it in this review (http://blog.360.yahoo.com/blog-qzcELew6frWBZspks_7SsnUuv9VNTUA-?cq=1&p=147) where I compare the Brentwood and PC Treasures versions.


Title: Re: Five Worst Movies You've Ever Had The Misfortune Of Watching
Post by: Neville on March 30, 2007, 04:46:57 PM
I usually forget awful movies within the week, but I can list the last two I've seen:

- The Holiday --> Holy s**t! This one was painful to watch. Unfunny, overlong, badly acted (Cameron diaz's most irritating role so far, but even Jude Law sucks here) and pretentious. f**k Nancy Meyers.

- Moscow Zero --> OK, a film about archeologists that investigate in the spooky underground of Moscow. Plus the leads are Vincent Gallo and Val Kilmer. What's the problem? That it sucks! It's only 80 minutes, but it's 80 minutes of people walking in the dark, intercut with flashes of light and a small girl in white. No atmosphere, no f**king plot! Nothing! Worst movie ever, period.


Title: Re: Five Worst Movies You've Ever Had The Misfortune Of Watching
Post by: hansey on April 04, 2007, 01:03:52 PM
1)  Dune....took me a week to finish I kept falling asleep threw it.   Why did I subject myself to that? 
2) Titanic....So much fluff I found it hard to breathe.  I was cheering at the end when Leo drowned, it p**sed my wife off (gf at the time)  but felt so good!
3)  Pay it Forward...actually anything starring Helen Hunt is an instant pile of junk.  uugghhh her face makes me wanna go gouge my eyes out.
4)  Godzilla (US remake)....what the hell did they do to you Godzilla?  They made u into a wussy!  ohh the humanity!
5) All the Harry Potter movies...yet i keep going to watch them...i must be a masaochist.

cuse me, thinking about these is making me sick!
ps:  bad guy at the end of Howard the Duck rules!


Title: Re: Five Worst Movies You've Ever Had The Misfortune Of Watching
Post by: venomx on April 04, 2007, 02:00:45 PM
 Yeah I did feel the same way about the US Godzilla ... what a joke ... now did you know in a movie title Godzilla Final Wars the US Godzilla and the Godzilla from Japan we all love fights the US version. I know I was in shock too. its a good movie its got all the old Monsters from tohos past even at one part of the film you can see the rare Smog monster in the background ... yeah every monter but MechaGodzilla and the good robot Jet Jaguar but thats another story, (I think) if anyone here likes to watch Godzilla films watch it ... its good and also I think its the last movie gona be made about Godzilla ... Theres more info about that film at a site I found ... and a mini clip ...
http://www.kensforce.com/Godzilla_Final_Wars_2004.html



Title: Re: Five Worst Movies You've Ever Had The Misfortune Of Watching
Post by: KYGOTC on April 04, 2007, 02:12:08 PM
its good and also I think its the last movie gona be made about Godzilla ... Theres more info about that film at a site I found ... and a mini clip ...
[url]http://www.kensforce.com/Godzilla_Final_Wars_2004.html[/url]




I doubt that they'll stop making Godzilla movies. As long as Godzilla has a big fanbase, Japan'll keep making them.



And if they stopped makeing them, id be very very sad. :bluesad:

But i dont think any of the new stuff will be as good as the old 60s and 70s films, but maybe they will be. Who knowz?


Title: Re: Five Worst Movies You've Ever Had The Misfortune Of Watching
Post by: MoronBoy on April 29, 2007, 10:29:36 PM
Date Movie: To make this worse, I had to sit and watch it with 2 people who thought it was freaking hilarious. They said I didn't like it because I had bad taste in movies. :question:

Straight to Hell: From the director of Repo Man, come a movie that makes no stinking sense whatsoever. I had high hopes for this one when I say it for sale on DVD.

Garbage Pail Kids: Had to watch it twice just to confirm it was as awful as I thought it was initially.

Police Academy: Mission to Moscow: Loved the first movie, the rest had good moments(part 6 was pretty lame though). I seen this the first time when I was 12(and would laugh at almost anything), and felt maybe I should have spent the time working on that book report that was due in two weeks I hadn't even started on.

Scary Movie 2: Let's reuse all the jokes that people laughed at in the first one. No one will ever notice.

Someone mentioned City of Rott, which while I haven't see, but a friend watched and said, "It was the only movie I've ever wanted to UNwatch."


Title: Re: Five Worst Movies You've Ever Had The Misfortune Of Watching
Post by: KYGOTC on April 29, 2007, 10:57:58 PM
Moronboy, Screeching weesels are super rad. :thumbup:


Title: Re: Five Worst Movies You've Ever Had The Misfortune Of Watching
Post by: Allhallowsday on April 30, 2007, 12:02:17 AM
I don't know if these are the Worst, or even if they're BAD movies, but they weren't good for me and in no particular order:

CANNIBAL FEROX: stupid and gross
WHEN A STRANGER CALLS: the original over-rated "classic." You know you're old when you saw a "classic" new in the theatre and couldn't even crack up about it because it was so boring. 
LAST HOUSE ON THE LEFT: an important film, and I despise it. 
Q:  p. u.
MOM AND DAD SAVE THE WORLD: despite Dwier Brown in a cave-boy outfit and cute and savage (and edible) sewer dwelling creatures, this was so very silly and tedious. 

Poor HOWARD THE DUCK is just reviled, but I don't think that's at all fair.  Critics have been taking pot shots at it since the night it opened.  I saw it in the theatre, and it certainly had been terribly over-hyped, but what did anyone expect from a movie called HOWARD THE DUCK?  I haven't seen it since it was new, but I remember being mildly amused by it.  I also liked EQUINOX (as cheap as they get.) I think BOOGIE NIGHTS and NATURAL BORN KILLERS are great films, but can see where they might be too painful.   

I like SssssssssS , idk why i just do. they should re-make that, i bet it could be good if handled properly.
  I like SSSSSSS too, sssilly ass it iss! 


Title: Re: Five Worst Movies You've Ever Had The Misfortune Of Watching
Post by: Just Plain Horse on April 30, 2007, 12:49:05 PM


I doubt that they'll stop making Godzilla movies. As long as Godzilla has a big fanbase, Japan'll keep making them.



And if they stopped makeing them, id be very very sad. :bluesad:

But i dont think any of the new stuff will be as good as the old 60s and 70s films, but maybe they will be. Who knowz?
[/quote]

No, they will not stop making them- I've already heard that someone is working on a Godzilla IMAX movie somewhere.

I personally feel the bulk of the "classic" Godzilla movies were a mixed blessing- some of the actors did a better job creating original human characters, but the monsters generally looked very poor. Some films- like King Kong vs. Godzilla or Godzilla vs. Monster Zero- seem like they could've only come about at a certain time and could never be redone successfully (even if the results weren't flawless). Others- like the basic stories behind the Mechagodzilla movies and the "Destroy all Monsters" movies seem to be steadily improving. In my opinion, Godzilla vs. Megalon was pretty awful, and Son of Godzilla and Godzilla's Revenge could've been rolled into one movie. With maybe the exception to the original and possibly Godzilla vs. Mothra, I don't think there aren't many G movies that couldn't be redone and come out looking better for it, provided they don't have such a heavy-handed feel to them that many before GMK and Final Wars did.


Title: Re: Five Worst Movies You've Ever Had The Misfortune Of Watching
Post by: Hunky Magoo on May 01, 2007, 05:46:36 AM
Scary Movie 4
Halloween 5
Uncle Sam
The Harry Potter Movies
Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles III


Title: Re: Five Worst Movies You've Ever Had The Misfortune Of Watching
Post by: batty007 on May 01, 2007, 06:46:56 AM
If by "worst", you mean "Best", this list becomes easy. But in the spirit of those who have posted before me, I will list 5 films which have annoyed me.
 
Field of Dreams- Kevin Costner always leaves me cold, but this schlocky weeper left me numb.
Mission To Mars- With Tim Robbins in it, it can't be half bad, right? WRONG!
The Fountain- For those who thought "Dune" was senseless gobbledy gook, you have the definition of it right here.
Grindhouse- There are 2 movies in this. The first is tremendous, with Robert Rodriguiez' Planet Terror. Now you've been waiting for Quentin to blow you out of your seat with "Death Proof". It never happens. The carachters talk and talk and talk, the dialogue is NOT fun, and theres some fol- de- rol at the end that doesn't come close to negating the incredible dissapointment.
Million Dollar Baby- I payed good money to see women beating the crap out of each other...and what the hell is this? A Poop Sandwich, that's what it is.


Title: Re: Five Worst Movies You've Ever Had The Misfortune Of Watching
Post by: BoyScoutKevin on May 01, 2007, 07:01:44 PM
I really don't like to use the word "worst," as I am sure I have seen "worst" movies then the ones I list here. What I like to use is "Five Most Unenjoyable Movies You"ve Ever Had the Misfortune of Watching."

And they include only movies that I have seen in the theater. And movies I have sat all the way through, which would exclude "Some Kind of Nut," as I walked out on that one. And there are actually only four movies that I have rated lower than a C- with B being the grade for an average movie.

D+
"Death of a Gunfighter"

D
"Horror House"

D-
I did walk out on this one, but I had seen it before, and I knew it wasn't going to get any better.
"Beyond Atlantis"

F
I know this one has its fans, but for me, after the saucy, French comic, it was a real letdown.
"Barbarella"