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Information Exchange => Solved => Topic started by: Darabka on March 31, 2007, 03:08:42 PM



Title: Really bad Space opera with SYLVESTER STALLONE!!!!!!!!!
Post by: Darabka on March 31, 2007, 03:08:42 PM
Hi I was searching for a really bad space opera movie (well maybe not as bad as Cosmos: War of the Planets  :bouncegiggle:). It was about a guy who returned to earth (or another planet) after a 9 year mission who couldnt wait tobe laid (im serious that is a real movie). But he found the whole planet enslaved by blue-headed aliens with long trunklike noses. This movie also had one of the worst space battle scenes ever (but again Cosmos takes the cake), a really bad Stop motion monster, wanna be mad max dudes and the best of all SYLVESTER STALLONE. The movie was a 70-ties or 80-ties movie, one of the many star wars ripoffs. Its so bad, but its funny to watch (like godzilla movies).


Title: Re: Really bad Space opera with SYLVESTER STALLONE!!!!!!!!!
Post by: Puzzled on April 02, 2007, 09:04:25 AM
Hi I was searching for a really bad space opera movie (well maybe not as bad as Cosmos: War of the Planets  :bouncegiggle:). It was about a guy who returned to earth (or another planet) after a 9 year mission who couldnt wait tobe laid (im serious that is a real movie). But he found the whole planet enslaved by blue-headed aliens with long trunklike noses. This movie also had one of the worst space battle scenes ever (but again Cosmos takes the cake), a really bad Stop motion monster, wanna be mad max dudes and the best of all SYLVESTER STALLONE. The movie was a 70-ties or 80-ties movie, one of the many star wars ripoffs. Its so bad, but its funny to watch (like godzilla movies).



I think you have something confused. Sylvester Stallone has never been in a movie like that. He's only been in a handful of SF films (Death Race 2000, Demolition Man and Judge Dredd, Spy Kids 3) and none of them resemble the film you're describing.

This is from the 90's ("The Greatest Film Ever Made") but sounds like it could possibly fit the description (the IMDB entry is kinda vague). http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0109244/plotsummary

Galaxina might be a better bet, since it is from the right time period and is often described as a Star Wars rippoff. I've not seen it myself, but the IMDB description sounds like it contains a number of the elements the OP mentions http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0080771/


Title: Re: Really bad Space opera with SYLVESTER STALLONE!!!!!!!!!
Post by: Jordan on April 02, 2007, 02:10:13 PM
Or it could be one of Stallone's early porno films. They didn't call him the "Italian Stallion" for nothing.  :bouncegiggle:  :wink:


Title: Re: Really bad Space opera with SYLVESTER STALLONE!!!!!!!!!
Post by: Puzzled on April 02, 2007, 03:50:14 PM
Or it could be one of Stallone's early porno films. They didn't call him the "Italian Stallion" for nothing.  :bouncegiggle:  :wink:

To the best of my knowledge he only did one porn film at the very start of his career. I did look at the plot summary for it on IMDB and it had no SF elements at all, nor have I ever seen it mentioned in any SF Movie History references. Unlike say "Flesh Gordon". Also Rocky predates Star Wars, so he'd already hit the big time before Star Wars came out.


Title: Re: Really bad Space opera with SYLVESTER STALLONE!!!!!!!!!
Post by: RCMerchant on April 02, 2007, 06:58:05 PM
I'd had done a search on Frank stallone as well...they look kinda the same...nada.


Title: Re: Really bad Space opera with SYLVESTER STALLONE!!!!!!!!!
Post by: Jordan on April 02, 2007, 10:45:25 PM
Thanks for the info Puzzled. Truthfully I was just kidding as I know that Rocky predated "Star Wars." However, I didn't realize Stallone only did one porno. (But who really knows, he may have done a few under a different name that have since been lost in the anals... err... annals of time.)

The one movie that keeps going through my head, concerning this topic is "Starcrash." (a.k.a. Starcrush, a.k.a. Female Space Invaders) But it definitely doesn't match the plot at all. Hmm... if only Robert Stack were still alive, I'm sure he could figure this one out for us.  :wink:


Title: Re: Really bad Space opera with SYLVESTER STALLONE!!!!!!!!!
Post by: Andrew on May 04, 2007, 05:46:01 PM
As I move this to the unsolved archives, I should point out to future posters that this may have been posted as an April Fool's joke.

If we do run across this movie, I want to see it.


Title: Re: Really bad Space opera with SYLVESTER STALLONE!!!!!!!!!
Post by: Kester Pelagius on May 05, 2007, 08:21:13 AM
As I move this to the unsolved archives, I should point out to future posters that this may have been posted as an April Fool's joke.

If we do run across this movie, I want to see it.

I think you may be right about this post being a prank.  I've never heard of such a movie, and I've quite a few print reference books.  A quick Google search turned up barely a page of hits for "blue-headed aliens" and the only movie to generate a hit was Wham Bam Thank You Spaceman which may be a sci-fi sexploitationer but it's not space opera, not even close.

It would be helpful if the original poster would return to either let us in on the joke or give us more information, like whether or not this is supposed to be live-action or anime.


Title: Re: Really bad Space opera with SYLVESTER STALLONE!!!!!!!!!
Post by: Darabka on October 13, 2008, 10:28:43 PM
Hey guys its me again Darabka!

It was a while sorry for the delay, thanks for all the help so far!

I have totally forgotten about this post until today when (Its too funny  :bouncegiggle:) I was looking for this same movie!!! What Irony!

I assure you guys this movie was real! Now the guy I was thinking of might have just looked very similar to sly, since I have looked up his filmography and there was nothing even remote. If it helps I saw this movie in Germany on the then Kabel 1 (now Kabelkanal) or Pro Sieben I dont remember. Wham Bam Thank You Spaceman doesnt match it also I think the movie I saw is one of the many notorious Star Wars rip offs (a really bad one, but not as bad as Cosmos, Humanoid or the dreaded Turkish Star Wars!).

Some things I remember:

-The Aliens had longish noses like elephant trunks but not too long, blue skin but you saw really only their face and had black suits on

-When the guy returns back from his nine year trip (I think from Jupiter or Saturn?) He realizes that the world has been taken over by those Aliens and that that interstellar war changed earth into a post nuclear world (Here it becomes more like Mad Max- rip off).

-The "Hero" meets up with this guy that looks like Sly and that guy is a leader of youre typical Post Nuke-Gang ala Mad-Max, Escape from New York, and fights him in the obligatory "If you wanna be a member of the gang fight" - Duel and uses a big fancy Spear (I think thats were 2/3 of the miniscule budget went  :wink: .

-The Main Hero and the love interest girl have sex at a campfire and the really badly animated stop motion monster attacks them.

-In th end they destroy all aliens conviniently with some sort of death-virus/crystal thingie (Yeah I know very technical term, whatever  :smile:) and run through a field with the guy zoomend in on

Now I remember this movie very viwidly only I cant remember the title. It could be a foreign (probably Italian, British, Spanish etc) movie and is thatswhy hard to find. I just recently realized how many trashy movies there are and many of them are foreign and hard to find.

If I find it somewhere I will post a link to it here PROMISE!


Title: Re: Really bad Space opera with SYLVESTER STALLONE!!!!!!!!!
Post by: paula on October 07, 2009, 01:25:23 AM
Or it could be one of Stallone's early porno films. They didn't call him the "Italian Stallion" for nothing.  :bouncegiggle:  :wink:

stallone....the original crossover star!


Title: Re: Really bad Space opera with SYLVESTER STALLONE!!!!!!!!!
Post by: oxode on March 28, 2010, 09:02:09 AM
Or it could be one of Stallone's early porno films. They didn't call him the "Italian Stallion" for nothing.  :bouncegiggle:  :wink:
All Stallone's pornos were silent one realers. There was only one try in pasting his porno scenes in a talky, but that was a kind of gangster flick.


Title: Re: Really bad Space opera with SYLVESTER STALLONE!!!!!!!!!
Post by: Glypodont on April 07, 2010, 11:32:01 PM
Hey guys its me again Darabka!

It was a while sorry for the delay, thanks for all the help so far!

I have totally forgotten about this post until today when (Its too funny  :bouncegiggle:) I was looking for this same movie!!! What Irony!

I assure you guys this movie was real! Now the guy I was thinking of might have just looked very similar to sly, since I have looked up his filmography and there was nothing even remote. If it helps I saw this movie in Germany on the then Kabel 1 (now Kabelkanal) or Pro Sieben I dont remember. Wham Bam Thank You Spaceman doesnt match it also I think the movie I saw is one of the many notorious Star Wars rip offs (a really bad one, but not as bad as Cosmos, Humanoid or the dreaded Turkish Star Wars!).

Some things I remember:

-The Aliens had longish noses like elephant trunks but not too long, blue skin but you saw really only their face and had black suits on

-When the guy returns back from his nine year trip (I think from Jupiter or Saturn?) He realizes that the world has been taken over by those Aliens and that that interstellar war changed earth into a post nuclear world (Here it becomes more like Mad Max- rip off).

-The "Hero" meets up with this guy that looks like Sly and that guy is a leader of youre typical Post Nuke-Gang ala Mad-Max, Escape from New York, and fights him in the obligatory "If you wanna be a member of the gang fight" - Duel and uses a big fancy Spear (I think thats were 2/3 of the miniscule budget went  :wink: .

-The Main Hero and the love interest girl have sex at a campfire and the really badly animated stop motion monster attacks them.

-In th end they destroy all aliens conviniently with some sort of death-virus/crystal thingie (Yeah I know very technical term, whatever  :smile:) and run through a field with the guy zoomend in on

Now I remember this movie very viwidly only I cant remember the title. It could be a foreign (probably Italian, British, Spanish etc) movie and is thatswhy hard to find. I just recently realized how many trashy movies there are and many of them are foreign and hard to find.

If I find it somewhere I will post a link to it here PROMISE!

This sounds like my vague memories of SPACEHUNTER: ADVENTURES IN THE FORBIDDEN ZONE. Have you checked that out?


Title: Re: Really bad Space opera with SYLVESTER STALLONE!!!!!!!!!
Post by: Darabka on September 28, 2011, 06:05:35 AM
I have seen spacehunter, but its definetly not that one. I believe that movie is so obscure, it will be a mystery forever. So far I have found every obscure movie or TV series, EXEPT this one, sigh...  :bluesad:


Title: Re: Really bad Space opera with SYLVESTER STALLONE!!!!!!!!!
Post by: Rayo Casablanca on November 27, 2011, 06:01:09 PM
I'm pretty sure this is Brett Piper's super rare GALAXY DESTROYER (released in '86 on video but likely filmed much eariier). The plot is very similar: An astronaut returns from a space mission to find the Earth taken over by warthog-like aliens (with trunks) and must defeat them with a special weapon he has (likely the spear you refer to).

Check out Brett's site with art from the flick -- you can see the aliens here: http://www.brettpiper.com/movies/galaxydestroyer/poster_galaxydestroyer_pakistan_BIG.jpg
http://www.brettpiper.com/movies/galaxydestroyer/cover_galaxydestroyer_greece_vhs_BIG.jpg




Title: Re: Really bad Space opera with SYLVESTER STALLONE!!!!!!!!!
Post by: Darabka on December 15, 2011, 08:18:37 PM
Thanks Rayo you are right altough I figured it out myself, today by complete accident. I was watching Brett Pipers Fantasy/Post Apocaliptic crap called "Nymphoid Barbarian in Dinosaur Hell" on Netflix instant, and after I did so looked up info about the movie and director on the net. Then I found a website about him looked throught the movies and found the movie, by chance.

Thanks anyway Rayo and all the others, and NO it wasnt a prank as you can see, this is a real movie, albeit a REALLY obscure one. My mistake was that I thought the main biker leader was Sylvester Stallone, when he might of just looked like him, but its so long ago that I dont remember.

Amyway this one is solved.


Title: Re: Really bad Space opera with SYLVESTER STALLONE!!!!!!!!!
Post by: Rev. Powell on December 16, 2011, 11:09:55 AM
Wow... solved after 4 years!  Never give up!