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Other Topics => Weird News Stories => Topic started by: Torgo on February 20, 2008, 07:23:29 PM



Title: New York Woman Stabbed Man With Kitchen Knife for Calling Her 'Ugly'
Post by: Torgo on February 20, 2008, 07:23:29 PM
http://www.foxnews.com/story/0,2933,331468,00.html (http://www.foxnews.com/story/0,2933,331468,00.html)

and in honor of this story I figured I would post some of these:

You're so ugly, when you walk into the bank they turn off the cameras.

If ugliness were bricks, you would be the Great Wall Of China.

You're so ugly, you went to a haunted house and came out with an application.

If ugliness was a crime, you'd get the electric chair.

You were so ugly at birth, your parents named you Sh*t Happens.

You're so ugly, your mate won't have to worry about birth control...your face will do just fine.

You're so ugly, you could model for death threats.

You're so ugly, when you were born they put tinted windows on your incubator.

You're so ugly, you have to sneak up on your mirror.

You're so ugly, when you look in the mirror your reflection turns to stone.

You're so ugly, when you sit in the sand the cats try to bury you.

You're so ugly, your doctor is a vet.

You're so ugly, when you were born the doctor took one look at you and slapped your parents.

You're so ugly, you stuck your head out of the car window and got arrested for mooning.

You're so ugly, your pet name is Scooby-Doo.

Your girl is so ugly, you gave her a hickey and got a mouthful of fur.

You're so ugly, you have to Trick or Treat by phone.

You're so ugly, when your mother went into labor your father went into shock.

You're so ugly, every time your mother looks at you she says to herself, "Damn, I should've
just given head."

I know why you look like a horse, because I saw your mother grazing in the field.

You're so ugly, when we play peek-a-boo - first I peeked, then I booed.

You're so ugly, you can sink your face in dough and make monster cookies.

You're so ugly, they call you Taco Bell, when people see you they run for the border.

You're so ugly, you make onions cry.

You're so ugly, the tide wouldn't bring you in.

You're so ugly, I took you to see the zookeeper and he said, "Thanks for bringing him back."

You're so ugly, you mother had to get drunk before she breast fed you.

You're so ugly, you went to a freak show and got a permanent job.

You're so ugly, the police sketch artists are afraid to draw you.

You're so ugly, when you get sick they call the vet.

You're so ugly, you make blind kids cry.

You're so ugly, farmers use your picture as a scarecrow.

You're so ugly, every time you go out you get chased by the dog catcher.

You're so ugly, when you jerk off your hand tries to fall asleep.

You're so ugly, you can't hail a bus.

You're so ugly, they call you Moses because every time you step in the lake, the water parts.

You're so ugly, you give Freddy Kruegger nightmares.

You're so ugly, they let you park in handicapped spaces.

You're so ugly, when you threw a boomerang it didn't come back.

You're so ugly, when you went to the zoo they refused to let you out.

You're so ugly, you can't get a date off the calendar.

You're so ugly, when your mother went into labor the doctors went on strike.

You're so ugly, your last name is Link and your first is Missing.

You're so ugly, people put your picture in their car window as an anti-theft device.

You're so ugly, that you can turn milk into yogurt, just by looking at it.

You're so ugly, people create a Jackson Pollock style painting when they spew on the floor.



Title: Re: New York Woman Stabbed Man With Kitchen Knife for Calling Her 'Ugly'
Post by: RCMerchant on February 20, 2008, 07:40:19 PM
Your so ugly-you'd make a freight train take a dirt road.
 Your so ugly-they had to tie a pork chop around your neck as a kid to get the dog to play with you.
 Your so ugly-when you were born,the doctors threw you out and gave your Ma the afterbirth.
 Your so ugly-when you were born ,the doc looked at your ass and said-'Twins!'.
...and my personal favorite....

  If I had a dog as ugly as you,I'd shave his ass and make him walk backwards.  :twirl:


Title: Re: New York Woman Stabbed Man With Kitchen Knife for Calling Her 'Ugly'
Post by: Mr. DS on February 20, 2008, 08:34:52 PM
Guys please...people's feelings can be hurt by this conversation.  Especially if they're so ugly the waiter puts their food on the floor when they go out to eat.