Movies => Bad Movies => Topic started by: Will on March 27, 2001, 12:17:21 PM

Title: My recent viewings
Post by: Will on March 27, 2001, 12:17:21 PM
"House By the Park" -- Whoa.  This is one tough piece to watch.  Starring that guy who was the main baddy in Last House on the Left, this is essentially a revisiting of the theme.  A group of swingin' disco cats pick him and his "slow" friend up for a party.  He proceeds to beat the @!#$ out of everybody and rape the women.  Stupid twist ending, but extremely funny slow-mo shot of his facial expressions when he's shot in the crotch.  This is slightly more mean-spirited than "I Spit on Your Grave" if that tells you anything.  2 slimes because of the funny death and disco dancing.

"Mutant" -- Wings Hauser is the man, but not really in this one.  I thought it was pretty boring, with a few decent moments.  Given my background as a purebred Appalachian, I get irritated by "Hillbilly" stereotypes.  But what do you expect from a bunch of stupid yankees? (Get it? I get irritated by a stereotype and then throw out another one?  Oh gosh, I'm so clever....)  1 and a half slimes.

"The Company of Wolves" -- I'd been meaning to see this forever, and it had gotten built up to the point where I was somewhat disappointed.  It was interesting to see Neil Jordan's early work with atmosphere, but the pacing was a little slow for me.  2 slimes.

"Masters of the Universe" -- "YOU CANNOT DEFEAT ME!!.....I AM....SKELETOR!!"  Do I even need to say a word?  I rented this so I could bootleg myself a copy.  5 slimes.  Beautiful.

"Generation aX" and "Crinoline Head" -- Two schlocky shot-on-dv self-aware slashers that actually pre-date "Scream" by a year.  No-budget (not even any effects) and too few laughs (particularly in "Crinoline Head") prevent these from being sooper dooper, but "Generation aX" had some killer post-valley girl-speak.  "Like, Boo and stuff."  The dialogue is the highpoint of both.  I recommend for end-of-the-night nodding off.  3 slimes and 2 slimes, respectively.