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Other Topics => Off Topic Discussion => Topic started by: A.J. Bauer on March 10, 2011, 01:47:35 PM



Title: Riddles
Post by: A.J. Bauer on March 10, 2011, 01:47:35 PM
Here's a fun thread. Present a riddle or puzzle for the people of the forum. Anybody can post a riddle. The first person to solve your riddle you must award them +1 Karma.

I'll start out with an easy one.

There's a house. All four sides of the house face south. A bear approaches the house.

What color is the bear's fur?


Title: Re: Riddles
Post by: Jack on March 10, 2011, 01:50:58 PM
I suppose it would be white because the house would have to be on the north pole?

Here's one:  how far can a bear (or anything else) run in to the woods?


Title: Re: Riddles
Post by: Flick James on March 10, 2011, 01:51:21 PM
I remember that one from Young Sherlock Holmes. White, because if all four walls face south it's on the north pole, thus, a polar bear.


Title: Re: Riddles
Post by: Flick James on March 10, 2011, 01:51:49 PM
I suppose it would be white because the house would have to be on the north pole?

Here's one:  how far can a bear (or anything else) run in to the woods?

Damn you Jack, you beat me by seconds.


Title: Re: Riddles
Post by: A.J. Bauer on March 10, 2011, 01:55:03 PM
I remember that one from Young Sherlock Holmes. White, because if all four walls face south it's on the north pole, thus, a polar bear.

Actually I learned it from a Kid's WB show called "The Batman". Which featured a long-haired Riddler that looked EXACTLY like Micheal Jackson. One of his riddles was that one. But he said all four sides facing NORTH. Batman realised that it was a trick question. There ARE no polar bears in Antarctica!


Title: Re: Riddles
Post by: Flick James on March 10, 2011, 01:58:13 PM
I suppose it would be white because the house would have to be on the north pole?

Here's one:  how far can a bear (or anything else) run in to the woods?

Half-way. After that he/she is running out.

Here's one that p**sed me off when I saw the answer:

What is in seasons, seconds, centuries and minutes but not in decades, years or days?


Title: Re: Riddles
Post by: A.J. Bauer on March 10, 2011, 02:03:51 PM
I suppose it would be white because the house would have to be on the north pole?

Here's one:  how far can a bear (or anything else) run in to the woods?

Half-way. After that he/she is running out.

Here's one that p**sed me off when I saw the answer:

What is in seasons, seconds, centuries and minutes but not in decades, years or days?


The letter "N"


Title: Re: Riddles
Post by: claws on March 10, 2011, 02:36:01 PM
A few kids are walking down a street. Two are walking behind one kid, one walks between and one before two kids. How many kids should there be?


Title: Re: Riddles
Post by: bob on March 10, 2011, 02:40:52 PM
A few kids are walking down a street. Two are walking behind one kid, one walks between and one before two kids. How many kids should there be?

3?


Title: Re: Riddles
Post by: Jack on March 10, 2011, 03:38:00 PM
Here's one:  how far can a bear (or anything else) run in to the woods?

Half-way. After that he/she is running out.


Correct-o-mundo  :teddyr:


Title: Re: Riddles
Post by: RCMerchant on March 10, 2011, 06:05:02 PM
What's the difference between a truck load of babies and a truck load of bowling balls?


Title: Re: Riddles
Post by: indianasmith on March 10, 2011, 07:16:34 PM
You can't unload bowling balls with a pitchfork!!

Here's a poser:

A prisoner received a visitor one afternoon.  After the guest left, his cellmate said: "Who was that guy, anyway?"
The prisoner answered:
"Brothers and sisters I have none,
but that man's father
was my father's son!"

Who was it?


Title: Re: Riddles
Post by: RCMerchant on March 10, 2011, 07:43:07 PM
Indy got it!  :thumbup:

The guy visting was Jesus?  :question:


Title: Re: Riddles
Post by: A.J. Bauer on March 10, 2011, 07:44:49 PM
You can't unload bowling balls with a pitchfork!!

Here's a poser:

A prisoner received a visitor one afternoon.  After the guest left, his cellmate said: "Who was that guy, anyway?"
The prisoner answered:
"Brothers and sisters I have none,
but that man's father
was my father's son!"

Who was it?

The prisoner's son.


Title: Re: Riddles
Post by: A.J. Bauer on March 10, 2011, 07:49:21 PM
A father and son get in a car crash. The two are sent to separate hospitals.

The doctor comes in to operate on the son. The doctor refuses to operate saying "I cannot operate on this boy. He's my son!"

Who is the doctor?


Title: Re: Riddles
Post by: Allhallowsday on March 10, 2011, 08:07:48 PM
A father and son get in a car crash. The two are sent to separate hospitals.

The doctor comes in to operate on the son. The doctor refuses to operate saying "I cannot operate on this boy. He's my son!"

Who is the doctor?
His mother.


Title: Re: Riddles
Post by: A.J. Bauer on March 10, 2011, 08:17:36 PM
A father and son get in a car crash. The two are sent to separate hospitals.

The doctor comes in to operate on the son. The doctor refuses to operate saying "I cannot operate on this boy. He's my son!"

Who is the doctor?
His mother.

THANK YOU!! NOBODY EVER GETS THAT ONE!


Title: Re: Riddles
Post by: bob on March 10, 2011, 08:58:55 PM
A father and son get in a car crash. The two are sent to separate hospitals.

The doctor comes in to operate on the son. The doctor refuses to operate saying "I cannot operate on this boy. He's my son!"

Who is the doctor?
His mother.

THANK YOU!! NOBODY EVER GETS THAT ONE!

For some reason in a high school math class a teacher started the class by asking that to us. Years later I still don't know why she did.


Title: Re: Riddles
Post by: ghouck on March 10, 2011, 09:58:10 PM
How do you take a condom off an elephant?


Title: Re: Riddles
Post by: indianasmith on March 10, 2011, 11:58:38 PM
Why would an elephant be wearing a condom when their population is so endangered?


Title: Re: Riddles
Post by: Allhallowsday on March 11, 2011, 12:07:33 AM
...THANK YOU!! NOBODY EVER GETS THAT ONE!
What's the difference between a saloon and an elephant's fart??  :question:


Title: Re: Riddles
Post by: ghouck on March 11, 2011, 12:07:45 AM
Why would an elephant be wearing a condom when their population is so endangered?

Perhaps due to the most popular reason they are used: to help fight the spread of disease?


Title: Re: Riddles
Post by: A.J. Bauer on March 11, 2011, 12:13:27 AM
Why would an elephant be wearing a condom when their population is so endangered?

Perhaps due to the most popular reason they are used: to help fight the spread of disease?

I heard AIDS was caused by some guy who sodomized a monkey. I don't know if it's true but it sure would be funny.


Title: Re: Riddles
Post by: ghouck on March 11, 2011, 12:15:51 AM
Why would an elephant be wearing a condom when their population is so endangered?

Perhaps due to the most popular reason they are used: to help fight the spread of disease?

I heard AIDS was caused by some guy who sodomized a monkey. I don't know if it's true but it sure would be funny.

Not if you were the monkey :)


Title: Re: Riddles
Post by: A.J. Bauer on March 11, 2011, 12:25:14 AM
Why would an elephant be wearing a condom when their population is so endangered?

Perhaps due to the most popular reason they are used: to help fight the spread of disease?

I heard AIDS was caused by some guy who sodomized a monkey. I don't know if it's true but it sure would be funny.

Not if you were the monkey :)

Not if you're and AIDS patient either. You're dying because some guy f**ked a monkey, how 'bout that?


Title: Re: Riddles
Post by: Allhallowsday on March 11, 2011, 12:31:52 AM
...
I heard AIDS was caused by some guy who sodomized a monkey. I don't know if it's true but it sure would be funny.
I think the theory was a kind of cross contamination through a bite or more likely by consuming monkey meat; then human intercourse spread the virus. 


Title: Re: Riddles
Post by: Mofo Rising on March 11, 2011, 03:41:57 AM
Why would an elephant be wearing a condom when their population is so endangered?

Perhaps due to the most popular reason they are used: to help fight the spread of disease?

I heard AIDS was caused by some guy who sodomized a monkey. I don't know if it's true but it sure would be funny.

Not if you were the monkey :)

Not if you're and AIDS patient either. You're dying because some guy f**ked a monkey, how 'bout that?

To be fair, maybe that's exactly what that monkey needed at that moment. A little wine, a little romance...

On a more serious note, viruses show the distressing ability to jump species. After all, they don't care who hosts them, as long as they're getting attention. There is a reason why the "swine flu" and "avian flu" epidemics are named what they are.

Allhallowsday is correct in the current thinking of the origin of HIV, but the truth is no one right now knows exactly where it arose. The "some guy f**ked a monkey" story is hold-over from the '80s, when AIDS was viewed as a strictly homosexual disease. Some randy dude deserves what he got, eh? A bit facile and fun to talk about, but not quite so much fun when you look at the true damage the disease is causing worldwide. Especially if you actually know somebody who has died of AIDS.

That's a downer, though. Ghouck, you've got me stumped. How do you get a condom off an elephant?


Title: Re: Riddles
Post by: Trevor on March 11, 2011, 03:53:46 AM
That's a downer, though. Ghouck, you've got me stumped. How do you get a condom off an elephant?

Ask nicely and then remove it. Carefully.  :buggedout: :buggedout:

What do you get if you cross an owl with a bungee cord?


Title: Re: Riddles
Post by: RCMerchant on March 11, 2011, 07:17:39 AM
That's a downer, though. Ghouck, you've got me stumped. How do you get a condom off an elephant?

Ask nicely and then remove it. Carefully.  :buggedout: :buggedout:

What do you get if you cross an owl with a bungee cord?

Bouncing hooters?  :question:


Title: Re: Riddles
Post by: Trevor on March 11, 2011, 07:29:50 AM
That's a downer, though. Ghouck, you've got me stumped. How do you get a condom off an elephant?

Ask nicely and then remove it. Carefully.  :buggedout: :buggedout:

What do you get if you cross an owl with a bungee cord?

Bouncing hooters?  :question:

 :bouncegiggle: :bouncegiggle:

That's better than the reply in Kung Pow Enter The Fist: "My ass."  :question: I still don't get it.


Title: Re: Riddles
Post by: A.J. Bauer on March 11, 2011, 08:38:15 AM
Anyway... Back to the riddles...


Title: Re: Riddles
Post by: The Burgomaster on March 11, 2011, 11:08:06 AM
A father and son get in a car crash. The two are sent to separate hospitals.

The doctor comes in to operate on the son. The doctor refuses to operate saying "I cannot operate on this boy. He's my son!"

Who is the doctor?
His mother.

THANK YOU!! NOBODY EVER GETS THAT ONE!

This was on ALL IN THE FAMILY about 38 years ago, so I always get it!





Title: Re: Riddles
Post by: Flick James on March 11, 2011, 11:18:03 AM
A father and son get in a car crash. The two are sent to separate hospitals.

The doctor comes in to operate on the son. The doctor refuses to operate saying "I cannot operate on this boy. He's my son!"

Who is the doctor?
His mother.

It was also in an episode of The Cosby Show.

THANK YOU!! NOBODY EVER GETS THAT ONE!

This was on ALL IN THE FAMILY about 38 years ago, so I always get it!






Title: Re: Riddles
Post by: Allhallowsday on March 11, 2011, 12:19:34 PM
This one hasn't been solved:
What's the difference between a saloon and an elephant's fart?? :question:


Title: Re: Riddles
Post by: Raffine on March 11, 2011, 01:42:08 PM
A father and son get in a car crash. The two are sent to separate hospitals.

The doctor comes in to operate on the son. The doctor refuses to operate saying "I cannot operate on this boy. He's my son!"

Who is the doctor?
His mother.

THANK YOU!! NOBODY EVER GETS THAT ONE!

For some reason in a high school math class a teacher started the class by asking that to us. Years later I still don't know why she did.

That joke was a running gag in an episode of All In The Family about Gloria's new friend who is a militant 'Woman's Libber".


Title: Re: Riddles
Post by: A.J. Bauer on March 11, 2011, 01:52:11 PM
This one hasn't been solved:
What's the difference between a saloon and an elephant's fart?? :question:

Sounds like the beginning of a joke to me. I can think of many differences. A saloon gives out liqour is made of wood, is a building, too many right answers.


Title: Re: Riddles
Post by: Newt on March 11, 2011, 02:55:28 PM
This one hasn't been solved:
What's the difference between a saloon and an elephant's fart?? :question:

Ahem: (and only because I have kids) One's a bar room and the other is a BAROOOOM!

Try this:

The Maker does not need it, the Buyer does not use it and the User does so without seeing it.  What is it?


Title: Re: Riddles
Post by: RCMerchant on March 11, 2011, 05:38:31 PM
This one hasn't been solved:
What's the difference between a saloon and an elephant's fart?? :question:

Ahem: (and only because I have kids) One's a bar room and the other is a BAROOOOM!

Try this:

The Maker does not need it, the Buyer does not use it and the User does so without seeing it.  What is it?


My ass!  :twirl:


Title: Re: Riddles
Post by: bob on March 11, 2011, 09:40:02 PM
How do you take a condom off an elephant?

With hands?


Title: Re: Riddles
Post by: Allhallowsday on March 12, 2011, 12:48:20 AM
This one hasn't been solved:
What's the difference between a saloon and an elephant's fart?? :question:
Ahem: (and only because I have kids) One's a bar room and the other is a BAROOOOM!
It's a riddle that's a pun that's a joke.  :thumbup:  :smile:


Title: Re: Riddles
Post by: A.J. Bauer on March 12, 2011, 09:51:43 AM
It cannot be seen, cannot be felt, Cannot be heard, cannot be smelt. It lies behind stars and under hills, And empty holes it fills. It comes first and follows after, Ends life, kills laughter.


Title: Re: Riddles
Post by: ghouck on March 12, 2011, 10:50:07 AM

That's a downer, though. Ghouck, you've got me stumped. How do you get a condom off an elephant?

You take the 'Y' out of SAY, and the 'F' out of WAY.


Title: Re: Riddles
Post by: indianasmith on March 12, 2011, 12:10:09 PM
It cannot be seen, cannot be felt, Cannot be heard, cannot be smelt. It lies behind stars and under hills, And empty holes it fills. It comes first and follows after, Ends life, kills laughter.

Darkness!

OK, here's one that stumps my students every year.

Three men check into a hotel room on  a business trip.  The bellhop tells them: "That will be $30."  They decide to split the cost evenly, so they each give him $10.    He takes the money to the manager who says "We are running a special this week - that room is only $25!"  He hands the bellhop five $1 bills and tells him to take their men the change.  On the way upstairs, the bellhop reasons: "There is no way to split five ones evenly among three guys.  And they didn't tip me  earlier!"  So he stuffed $2 in his pocket and gave them back each $1.

Now . . . each man paid $10, and each got $1 back.  So they paid $9 for the room apiece.

9 times 3 is 27.
Plus the two the bellhop kept is 29.
Where is the missing dollar?


Title: Re: Riddles
Post by: ghouck on March 12, 2011, 01:55:36 PM
It cannot be seen, cannot be felt, Cannot be heard, cannot be smelt. It lies behind stars and under hills, And empty holes it fills. It comes first and follows after, Ends life, kills laughter.

Darkness!

OK, here's one that stumps my students every year.

Three men check into a hotel room on  a business trip.  The bellhop tells them: "That will be $30."  They decide to split the cost evenly, so they each give him $10.    He takes the money to the manager who says "We are running a special this week - that room is only $25!"  He hands the bellhop five $1 bills and tells him to take their men the change.  On the way upstairs, the bellhop reasons: "There is no way to split five ones evenly among three guys.  And they didn't tip me  earlier!"  So he stuffed $2 in his pocket and gave them back each $1.

Now . . . each man paid $10, and each got $1 back.  So they paid $9 for the room apiece.

9 times 3 is 27.
Plus the two the bellhop kept is 29.
Where is the missing dollar?

It's not missing. They paid 25 for the room, plus the two the bellhop kept, that's 27. The money they paid includes the 2 the bellhop kept, but not the 3 he gave them back.


Title: Re: Riddles
Post by: Raffine on March 12, 2011, 02:08:33 PM
Why do kittens make good television announcers?


Title: Re: Riddles
Post by: El Misfit on March 12, 2011, 03:27:39 PM
Im going to guess they are active?

There's this one story house, but everything inside is purple- the rooms, water, food. bed, etc. what color are the stairs?


Title: Re: Riddles
Post by: SPazzo on March 12, 2011, 03:42:56 PM
There's this one story house, but everything inside is purple- the rooms, water, food. bed, etc. what color are the stairs?

There are no stairs....

Okay, here's one:

I'm in a computer, and also in a dog.
I'm in your brother, as well as in the fog.
I'm not in your sister, but I am in your mom.
I won't be in the grass, but you'll find me in Tom.
You'll find me in a door, accompanied by a twin.
I can be found in a dove, but not ever in a spin.
I won't be seen in a cat, but you'll know I'm with two.
If you've been paying attention, I'm in you!

What am I?

 :wink: :teddyr:


Title: Re: Riddles
Post by: indianasmith on March 12, 2011, 04:19:28 PM
The letter O!!!!! :bouncegiggle:


Title: Re: Riddles
Post by: El Misfit on March 12, 2011, 10:37:19 PM
There's this one story house, but everything inside is purple- the rooms, water, food. bed, etc. what color are the stairs?

There are no stairs....

here's the actual answer- Are there stairs- the reason is that there isn't any indication if there is a stairs case or not. :wink: karma though..


Title: Re: Riddles
Post by: Allhallowsday on March 13, 2011, 12:36:53 AM
Why do kittens make good television announcers?

'Cause they have small paws.


Title: Re: Riddles
Post by: Mofo Rising on March 13, 2011, 03:47:54 AM
Try this:

The Maker does not need it, the Buyer does not use it and the User does so without seeing it.  What is it?

Anybody solved this one yet?


Ghouck, you've got me stumped. How do you get a condom off an elephant?

You take the 'Y' out of SAY, and the 'F' out of WAY.

Here goes...

There's no "F" in WAY!


Title: Re: Riddles
Post by: ghouck on March 13, 2011, 11:04:51 AM


Ghouck, you've got me stumped. How do you get a condom off an elephant?

You take the 'Y' out of SAY, and the 'F' out of WAY.

Here goes...

There's no "F" in WAY!

Darn right there's not!!!


Title: Re: Riddles
Post by: A.J. Bauer on March 15, 2011, 01:00:40 PM
This is fun!


Title: Re: Riddles
Post by: El Misfit on March 15, 2011, 06:04:58 PM
here's a classic that I don't get.

What's gold, has four wheels and flies?


Title: Re: Riddles
Post by: Mofo Rising on July 08, 2011, 03:56:08 AM
This one hasn't been solved:
What's the difference between a saloon and an elephant's fart?? :question:

Ahem: (and only because I have kids) One's a bar room and the other is a BAROOOOM!

Try this:

The Maker does not need it, the Buyer does not use it and the User does so without seeing it.  What is it?

This was never answered and it's driving me crazy. (I'm not going to Google it.)


Title: Re: Riddles
Post by: Raffine on July 08, 2011, 08:39:07 AM
Why do kittens make good television announcers?

'Cause they have small paws.

Close.

It's because they have 'wee paws for station identification'.   :teddyr:


Title: Re: Riddles
Post by: Newt on July 08, 2011, 08:47:49 AM
The Maker does not need it, the Buyer does not use it and the User does so without seeing it.  What is it?

This was never answered and it's driving me crazy. (I'm not going to Google it.)

 :teddyr: 


Title: Re: Riddles
Post by: Mofo Rising on July 21, 2011, 02:46:25 AM
The Maker does not need it, the Buyer does not use it and the User does so without seeing it.  What is it?

This was never answered and it's driving me crazy. (I'm not going to Google it.)

 :teddyr: 

Alright, Newt. Well played.

Okay, you have nine coins, all of equal weight except for one counterfeit coin which is lighter than the others. Using a balance scale, can you identify the counterfeit coin in two weighings? Karma to the first person with the solution.