Badmovies.org Forum

The golden days of porn are behind us. Now it's all amateur films of the pseudo-broke filming themselves intimately.

But there was a time when every single movie that was released had its porn equivalent. So make up some titles for whatever movie you want that should be XXX-ified.

(Sorry, Andrew, if this has to be filtered.)

My Wife as a Dog
Mr. Smith Does Washington
The Steaming Hot Passion of Joan of Arc (Considering how she died, that may be in poor taste.)
The Depantied
This Film is Not Yet Rated XXX
The Texas Chainsaw Gangbang

Sadly the time of creative, sex pun based titles is no more. They all got lazy and everything is Avatar: The XXX Parody or This Ain't Cheers: An XXX Parody.
Gone are the days of beetleJism or Ass Ventura :bluesad:

The Sexpendables
Scott Pilgrim Does The World

Incidentally this is a great game to play in charades: Porn film parody titles.  You gesture the same as when indicating its a film, but you grind while doing it so people know what you're talking about.

Can't think of any off the top of my head beyond the ones everyone knows like In Diana Jones and the Temple of Poon etc but it was a hell of a fun night.

Slutter Island

Transsexuals 2: Revenge of the Ballin'

Insexion

Hairy Pudder and the Philosopher's Bone

The Ho's Must Be Crazy

Hmmm, trying to think of a few more modern ones:

Conception

Diary of a horny kid

The Last Assbender

Hot Tub Sex Machine

Clash of the Titts and ass.


Ok so not witty, but anyways.

The Godf**ker
Plan 69 From Outer Space
The Sexual Network
Sucking Punch
Pump Friction
Schindler's Fist*
One Flew Into Her Cuckoo's Nest

I have to agree with RD. Porn titles are really lazy and uncreative nowadays.  I was trying to look up some titles for a laugh the other day and all I could find was [insert movie title here]: An XXX Parody.  What's the point of that?  Plus, who actually watches porn films for the porn anymore?  There's the internet for that.

_{*I think this one might actually exist, but I couldn't find any info on it...  :lookingup:}

The Sex Room
Manos: The Hands of Pleasure

A few more:

The Shawl Skanks Perversion
Shaving Private Ryan (this might be a real porn title, dunno)
Eternal Rub-Shine of the Spotless Behind  :lookingup:
2001: A Sex Odyssey
Bravehard
The King's Speedo
Strangers on a Tranny
The Manchewing Candidate
V for Vagina  :bluesad:
How to Drain Your Dragon
Who's Afraid of Virgin Woof?
A Streethoe Named Desire

Triple feature by fictional British porn star Simon Pegged:

Shawn of the Head
Twat Fuzz
Moan Fatboy, Moan

And the Whore of the Rings trilogy:

Fellows Slip up the Ring
The Poo Plowers
Return of the Shlong

Those three would probably be gay porn.

I think it was Shaving Ryan's Privates.

The Anal Dead
Attack Of The Horny Tomatoes
The DP Pit
Deep Star 69
The Randy Return Of Swamp Thang

Ooh, how fun!

The Two Boleyn Girls
Handcock
Forrest Hump
Inside Woman (instead of Inside Man?)
Charlie Wilson's Whore
The Devil Wears Nada (this is actually a real softcore I've seen aired on Shotime)
Shooter (no need to change that one)
The Da Vinci Coed
Threesomes Retreat
The Soloists
I Love You, Men (process that however you want)
The Men Who Do More Than Just Stare At Goats

I Swallow On Your Grave

The Misogyny Of Dr. Fu Muff Chew

Masters of the Uterus
Children of the Porn
Dawn of the Head

Plan 69 from outer space
Backdoor mountain
Pud feast

A couple more:

Moby's Dick
Taint Misbehavin'

Oooh, this is the BEST thread!!!

I Am Number Sixty Nine
Underwear, Underwear Perversion, and Underwear 3: The Rise of the Erections
Star Whores
The Empire Sucks Jack
The Return of the One Eyed Snake
Penetrator (which is a real movie, a spoof of Terminator, and it's surprisingly good in a bad way)

Keep 'em cumming!  :teddyr:

I'm sure Jack will be pleased  :teddyr:

.F#ckinstein
.Doggystyle Day Afternoon
.Das Booty
.Creature from the Back Door Lagoon
.It Cum From Outer Space
.Legends of the Ball
.Midnight Plowboy
.Lawerence of the Labia
.Hallowiener
.Sexual Assault on Precient 13
.Meet the F@ckers ( yeh-too easy  :lookingup:)
.Moby Dick (again....^)
.White Heat (^)
.Around the World in 80 Gays
.She- Man and the Masterbaiters of the Universe
.Porkergiest
.Rearend Window
.The Tit and the Pendulum
.Hoe White and the 7 Dwarves
.ET- the Extra Testical (I got that from a Cheech and Chong movie...)
.I Cum in Peace
.The Good,the Bald, and the Fugly
.Cross- dressers of Iron (ok....I'm getting stupid here...I'll stop.)

RCMerchant, why can I not modify your karma?  "Das Booty" ... "Hoe White and the Seven Dwarves" ... "I Cum In Peace"  How can you not deserve more karma?  :thumbup:

I had my karma thingy disabled-it was bugging me. Thanxxx anyway!  :smile:
Or should I say it was buggering me? (Eeewww!!!!!  :bouncegiggle:)

I envy you for being able to do that. Wish I could  :bluesad:

That's a real one, or close to it. Don't ask how I know. :lookingup:
(http://www.adultfilmdatabase.com/graphics/Boxes/350/Front/13924.jpg)

HAaHAaHA! Man, that made me laugh! Awesome.

Hey, I can't believe you guys.... how about...

This Isn't Gilligan's Island!

Double Feature starring Tom Spanks:

Big
The Money Shot

Glistening Spunkwad Theatre 69000

"Cumbot! Lipsy! Tom Pervo! Blooooow!"

Not a bad idea really. Take cheesy old pornos and give them the MST treatment, with some XXX host segments starring a woman trapped in space with some interestingly-designed robots. :teddyr:

Full Metal Jack-off

Caddyshag

Robocock

There is actually a movie called MIDNIGHT PLOWBOY.  I have the DVD.  Here's the cover:

(http://ia.media-imdb.com/images/M/MV5BMTkxMzI5MDQyNV5BMl5BanBnXkFtZTcwMDAxMTgxMQ@@._V1._SY317_CR5,0,214,317_.jpg)

* NO CUNNY FOR OLD MEN
* THE BONE ERECTOR
* CLITTY, CLITTY, BANG, BANG
* SIXTEEN CONDOMS
* THE FRENCH CONNECTION (you don't even need to change the title on this one!)
* THE LAST KING OF SLUTLAND
* INDIANA JONES AND THE TEMPLE OF POON
* ASSLICK IN WONDERLAND
* THERE WILL BE PUD

Fisting Of The North Star

Carlito's Wang

Porn On The 4th Of July

Ramming Arizona

* THE ASS INSERTION OF JESSE JAMES BY THE COWARD ROBERT FORD
* 127 WHORES
* THE POSTMAN ALWAYS CUMS TWICE
* YEAR OF THE DRAGQUEEN
* HIGH PLAINS POOFTER
* THE LAST WHORE ON THE LEFT
* JISM (starring John Wayne)

HAHA! That's awesome! I would most definitely watch those.

G.A.S.H.

Crotches Of Fire

Drilling Miss Daisy

Busty & The Beast

A Few Good Members

Gangbangs Of New York

Spray Anything

More!-!
. A Hard On Days Night-with the Beatmeatles!
The Dryhumpback of Notre Dame
.Abutt and Cockstello meet the F#cker Boris Jerkoff (sorry Boris!)
.War of the Colassal Breast
.The Black Hoe
.Invasion of the Snatch Snatchers (Kinda proud of that one...!)
.2000 Sex Maniacs
.On Golden Shower Pond
.Pump Friction
.The Fantastic Foreplay-Rise of the Silver Slurper
.C#nt Buy Me Love
.Taste the Wad of Dickula


The AIP version!
.It Cockblocked the World-with Peter Graves and Lee Van Cl!t!
.The Killer Screws
.Attack of the Crabs
.The Breast with One Million Nipples
.Bucket of Menstral Blood (UGH! That even grosses ME out!!!)

Sounds like a pretty big cast.

Cum in 60 Seconds! :bouncegiggle: :buggedout:
The Brain from Planet Arouse! :bouncegiggle:
f**ktilicus
Forrest Bump

The video store I worked in back in the 1980s had a VHS tape called ON GOLDEN BLONDE.  I seem to remember there was a midget in it . . .

* CLIT! THE TERROR FROM BEYOND SPACE
* TASTE THE PUD OF DRACULA
* DON'T f**k IN THE BASEMENT
* THE HOUSE THAT CREAMED
* SCREWGE
* THE DEER HUMPER
* THE COLOR OF CUNNY

Star Jack: The Lotion Picture

and its many sequels:

The Splash of Dong
The Search for C*ck
The Voyeur's Bone
The Vinyl Frotteur
The Undiscovered C*nt
Gentle Asians
Fist Contact
Insta-rections
and
Numb As His

That would be the closest to sex most trekkies will ever be...!

(No offense,Trekgeezer!!!)

I hope these haven't been posted already.


Big Trouble in Little Vagina
True Clit
Forrest Rump
Boobs in Toyland
John Ford She-Male Theater Presents: She Wore a Yellow Condom, The Man-Woman Who Porked Liberty Valence, & Donovan's Queef
Tango & Gash
I. Labia

* ENEMA OF THE STATE
* YOU ONLY LICK TWICE
* THE PIMP OF GREENWICH VILLAGE
 

The Man Who Loved Scat Dancing

Porn on the 4th of July
The Man who blew too much

* CITIZEN c**t
* GOOD WILL c**tING
* HE WORE A YELLOW RUBBER
* CROTCH OF IRON
* FIVE FINGERS OF MASTURBATION
* THE CLIT AND THE PENDULUM

White Men Can't Hump

Die Hard: Die Harder With Viagra

Seven Butts For Seven Boners

Missionary Impossible

Swinger Shift

Alice in Wonderland: An X-Rated Musical Fantasy

Oh, wait a minute, this thing totally exists.

Geez, is this thread really OK?

Babe: Porked in the City
Dong of the Dead
Paths of Gloryholes
Who F@#*ed Roger Rabbit? (or Who F@#*ed Jessica Rabbit?)
Picnic at Hanging C*ck
Bill and Ted's Anal Adventure
The Adventures of Baron Buttpoundin
Mad Maxine: Beyond Dome

Navy Squeals

Beetlejizz

Maniac Cock

Labiarynth

* A FUNNY THING HAPPENED WHILE I WAS WASHING MY FORESKIN
* BILLY JACKOFF
* TIE ME UP, TIE ME DOWN, AND THEN f**k THE LIVING s**t OUT OF ME
* I POKED ANDY'S a***ole

Whore Of The Worlds

The C*ck-Blow Incident

The Whole Nine Inches

9 & 1/2 Wanks

E.I.: Extra Inches
2 Fast Twosome.
Snow White and the Seven Bl*ws

Some James Bond fun...

Moonraper
The Man With the Golden C*m
Lick And Let Dive
She Blew For A Thrill
Dr. Ho
You Only J!zz Twice
Thunderballs
Tommorow In Her Thighs

Dirty Lancing
Ghost D!ck
Bendback Mountain
Gay Of The Dead
The Dirty Cousins
Bimbo: First Blood

F**king of the Dead
Laid of  the dead
Some like it f**k
Godzilla: King of the Fisters
Rebel without a Bl** J*b
The D!cks of Hand Jobs

What's Eating Gilbert Grape's B*lls?

Butt Pirates Of The Carribean:  C*m On The White Girl

More from B.J. Blowing's beloved Hairy Pudder series:

Hairy Pudder Out of the Closet of Secrets
Hairy Pudder and the Prisoner of Ass Kablam
Hairy Pudder and the Gobbler of Spire
Hairy Pudder Gets an Order of Penis
Hairy Pudder and the One-Nut Queen
Hairy Pudder and the Beastly Swallows

Robot Chicken did something very similar.
http://video.adultswim.com/robot-chicken/ass-pirates-of-the-caribbean.html (http://video.adultswim.com/robot-chicken/ass-pirates-of-the-caribbean.html)

2 Fast, 2 Soon (a film about premature ejaculation)

Cum on Eileen (a song about the withdrawal method)

A Sale of Two Titties (a book about ... well) (and mentioned in a Monty Python sketch)

Monster Python's Flying Orgy

Tom Spanks Film Festival:

The Money Shot
Big
Forrest Hump
Charlie Wilson's Whore
Shaving Ryan's Privates

Bi-Curious George

Everyone on this thread should be ashamed of themselves.

Especially you.

I am TERRIBLY ashamed of myself.  But here are some more anyway (Oscar Winners!):

* ALL QUIET ON THE WESTERN c**t
* HOW GREEN WAS MY VAGINA
* THE BRIDGE ON THE RIVER QUEEF
* GLAD-HE-ATE-HER
* A BEAUTIFUL BEHIND

At least I'm promoting safe sex. A primary character in Bi-Curious George is The Man in the Yellow Jimmy Hat.

Footsie

Corvette Spunker

The Maltese Scrotum

Load of Silence

The Cum Of All Fears

Stephen King parodies:

The Grinding
Wet Sematary
The Butt Spank Redemption
T!T
The Cunnilingoliers
Jizzery
The Cream Smile
The Head Zone
Maximum Bonerdrive
The Rubbing Man (as Richard C*ckman)
The Fist
The Tommycockers

and many more possibilities....

Kramer does Kramer
Clash of the Tits
Aliens vs Sexual Predators
The Rocky Whore Picture Show
Extremely Dirty Harry
Bill and Ted's Most Excellent Orgy
Ghost Raper

The Entitty

Poltergasm

American cr***pie

Clithanger

I'm gagging just thinking about this one . . .

* THE GANG THAT COULDN'T SPEW STRAIGHT
* IN THE MOUTH OF MISTRESS
* SHAFT'S BIG WHORE!
* OBJECTIVE SPERMA
* THE LEGEND OF WHORE HOUSE
* THAT DARN c**t

Tru d!ck

Butt Pirates Of The Carribean 2: Big Trans' Breasts
Butt Pirates Of The Carribean 3:  At Both Ends

Indiana Bones:  Gaydars Of The Lust Ark
Indiana Bones:  The N!ipples Of Doom
Indiana Bones:   The Lust Crusade

F*ck Me If You Can
Trick Or Tw*t
The D!ldo's Advocate

One suggestion: How about Indianus Bones?

Ooooh, good one Raffine!

p**sin in the rain
The Great D!ck
12 horny men

The Good, The Bad, The Ugly and One Whore
Wet Dream On Elm Street
Friday The 13th...Inch
Four Weddings And A Gang B@ng
Mortal Kumbat
Street F*cker

The Wedding Banger
Bango
Frankenf**ker
The White Slime
The Semen

Queer And Pleasant Stranger
Jurassic Pork
The Princess And The Log
Nookie 2
Ferris Bon*r Gets Off
The Bangfest Club
Street F*cker The Legend Of C*m-Me

C*mjo

Cock Smoker & The Ass Bandit

This Is Anal Tap

Super Mario Boners

Super hornio Bros, oh wait..... :lookingup:
E.T. the Porno, ohh wait... :lookingup:

Dammit, both are real! :hatred: let me think:
The Penist
Sluts of Glory
To f**k a mother
The Eroticist
The 400 B**w J**s
Slutface

Stop! Or My Mom Will Squirt

Ewwwwwwwwww!

And since Carnosaur was mentioned in another topic, I'll go with:

* CARNAL SORE

Deep Blue Semen

Don't stop, or else I will c*m

When Harry F*cked Sally
Anal-ize This
Killer K*nts From Outer Space
Crude Runnings

Who's Hairy Cum?

Fags of our Fathers

Overdrawn at the Sperm Bank

Dr. Ho

Jurassic Porking

The White Slime

Whora Whora Whora

Mr. Smith Goes Down on Washington

* THE UNf**kABLE MOLLY BROWN
* THE GREATEST HO ON EARTH
* THE CURIOUS GREASE ON BENJAMIN'S BUTTOCKS
* THE REAM TEAM
* SPLENDOR IN HER ASS
* THE LONGEST LAY
* LAWRENCE OF LABIA
* TOM HORNY
* IN THE GOOD OLD HUMMERTIME
* SPEWLANDER
* A FISTFUL OF BALLSACK
* JEREMIAH'S JOHNSON
* MIGHTY JOE HUNG
* DESTINATION POON

A Fisting For Dollars

For a Two-Dollar Whore

Pu$$y Lips Now

Jelly's Dildos

Rooster Cockbum

She's a Wet Wet Wet Wet Girl

Came with the Wind

The Cum of All Queers

Pulp Fistin
The Iron Fister

Idle Handjob

The Lovely Boners

King Dong

Dr. Strange f***, or How I learned to stop worrying and love the [censored]

* JACK REACH-AROUND
* THE HOBBIT: THE MASTURBATION OF SCHLONG
* AUGUST: ORGASM CUNNY
* THE NOOKIE THIEF
* LEE DANIELS' THE BUTTOCKS
* SUCKING MR. BANKS
* PACIFIC RIM JOB
* A GOOD DAY TO GET HARD

Oh my god, I'm dying from this thread XD

* 21 HUMP STREET
* CUMMIN' IN THE WOODS
* LICKOUT
* SNOW WHITE AND THE C**TSMAN
* END OF CROTCH

RODZILLA - KING OF THE SCHLONGSTERS
KISS-ASS
THE ROD WARRIOR
REQUIEM FOR A CREAM
PORN RIDERS & PORN WARRIORS
FILTHY
PRON MONKEY
PRON MAN 1-3
M-19 The Widowlayer
LET THE RIGHT DONG IN
POONTRAP
NATURAL PORN KILLERS
ROD-DICK

Head Snow (or in Norwegian, Hed Sno)  :teddyr:

Miami Erection

I apologise if these have been done before, or are too explicit, but here you go.

Dong Hard With A Vengeance
The Elder Schlongs V: Skyrimjob
A Good Day To Drill Hard
Penetrator 2: Fudgepack Day
Sex Toy Story
Molesters, Inc.
WANK-R
Alien vs. Sexual Predator (hadn't realised this had been done before)
RoboCock 7 (this one as well)
Grand Theft A$$hole
American History XXX
The Wet Bunch
XXX-Men: First Clitorize
Dirty Hairy
Point Breast
Raping Bulls
They Lick
Reservoir Dongs
12 Years a Sex Slave
Pornstar Wars: The Empaler Squirts Back
The Jizzard of Oz

Peed For Speed - a young girl will do whatever it takes, even debasing herself, to score the drug of her choice

Mr. Peabody and Sheman - a dog and his transvestite companion have adventures through time (I resisted the easy urge to make two urine-based porn titles in a row here)

12 Rears a Slave - sure, they work hard during the day, but at night, when the owners are asleep, it's party time!

Cloudy With a Chance to Meet My Balls 2 - plot synopsis not available

Almost Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles - you can get into a lot of trouble for watching this one...

Pair of Abnormal Activities - a young man has a lot of sex while realizing that he went one porn title too far and should have stopped at the last one.

Fagcum Force (uh oh!)
Monster Python and the Horny Whale
Robin Stud
Metropoling

Can't come up with any better ones. All the good ones I came up with were done in my last post.

LMAO!   :cheers:

*JERSEY WHORE
*STAR WHORES
*LUST IN SPACE
*THE TRANSGENDERS (More The Meets The Eye, for sure!)
*THE ADVENTURES OF BUTTMAN AND THROBBIN'
*FIRE DOWN BELOW 2: THE BURNING BUSH
*BI-TANIC

*And you can see all these great movies and series on DICKOLODEON!

ILLEGAL ALIENS vs. SEXUAL PREDATOR
GUESS WHO CAME AT DINNER?
BEACH BLANKET BIMBO
KING DONG vs.RODZILLA
C.H.O.A.D.
C.H.O.A.D. 2: ODE TO CHOAD
OUR GANG BANG FOLLIES OF 1938
I KNOW WHO YOU DID LAST SUMMER

How about I Spit It Out On Your Grave?   :bouncegiggle:

Okay, I just came up with another.

The Italian Knob

Oscar Pick Edition, 2014:

American Hustler--Too easy, I know.

Captain Full Lips--Probably gay porn. Rum, sodomy, and the lash.

Debbie Does the Dallas Buyers Club--Surprisingly distasteful, if you know the history.

Gravititty--In 3-D? I'm intrigued.

Whore--Already made, I'm afraid.

NebrASSka--Ew. Grampa porn. I'm sorry.

Feel-Up Omina--Granny porn, this list is becoming seriously terrible.

The Whore of Wall Street--Probably not far off the mark.

I had one for 12 Years a Slave, but it was indescribably awful. Even I'm not comfortable with it, so I took it down. If you don't know me, that is a lot of awfulness.

You must have missed JayJayM12's "12 Rears a Slave" above.

Movies:

Cream A Little cr***pie  (Dream A Little Dream rip)
Blew Velvet
Oral And Hard-On: For Love Of Mummy
Loadhouse



(TV Series)

*Father Blows Best
*Leave It In The Beaver 
*Cumbat!
*The Scat Patrol
*The Honeypooners
*Gentle Ben Dover
*Assie
*Eat The C*ck  (Beat The Clock)

Stu-hard Little

Movies:
Glad-He-Ate-Her
The Kid With The Golden Di*k (Kid With The Golden Arm)
Poonraker (Moonraker)
The Three Spooges
Di*kula, Prince Of Darkness
The Penetrator (He'll be back!)
Das Butt
A Midnight Qu*er
Sucktacus


TV Series:
Big Gangbang Theory
Mike And Ollie
Hard Times (Good Times spoof)
Boners   (Bones spoof)
Full Poon: The Bi-light Saga
Lancelot Pink
Blojak

I Suck Your Balls and Drink Your C*m

* AVENGERS: INFINITY WHORE

* FANTASTIC BREASTS AND WHERE TO FIND THEM

* DUNCOCK

* G.I. JOE: MASTURBATION

* THE DICKTASTER

69 to Yuma.
 
Star whore revenge of the b***h.

the f--k awakens

star trek the wrath of cock.

star trek 3 the search for cock.

star trek into dark holes

Sukie
If Footmen Tire You What Will Whores Do
Whore Room

f**k It Ralph!

Position: Possible - Pullout (2018)
Jurassic Furred: Fallen Condom (2018)
Sicario: Day of the Dildo (2018)