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Other Topics => Weird News Stories => Topic started by: sprite75 on December 16, 2013, 11:04:37 PM



Title: Man caught pleasuring self in meat aisle
Post by: sprite75 on December 16, 2013, 11:04:37 PM
A British man was caught pleasuring himself in the meat aisle (http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2013/12/12/eugenio-freitas-caught-masturbating_n_4432077.html?utm_hp_ref=weird-news) of a UK supermarket;

Quote
Fortunately, the only meat he touched was his own.

Eugenio Freitas, 49, "fully intended" to go shopping at a local supermarket when he got extremely horny, became overwhelmed by his "excessive sexual drive," and began touching himself through his pants in the meat aisle, according to a UK court hearing. Closed circuit television recorded Freitas with his hands in his pockets for about 10 minutes.

A female employee at the Staffordshire supermarket saw Freitas, but did not realize that he was masturbating. She thought that he was merely "adjusting himself."

Caught red-handed, Freitas pleaded guilty to "outraging public decency." He was given a six month suspended sentence and banned from setting foot inside any UK supermarket without an adult chaperone.


Title: Re: Man caught pleasuring self in meat aisle
Post by: indianasmith on December 17, 2013, 12:21:01 AM
They should upgrade the charge to "unauthorized salami fondling!"


Title: Re: Man caught pleasuring self in meat aisle
Post by: El Misfit on December 17, 2013, 01:29:24 AM
Damn, Viagra side effects  sure goes a long way....


Title: Re: Man caught pleasuring self in meat aisle
Post by: Gst0395 on December 17, 2013, 04:59:19 AM
A friend of mine posted this on Facebook.

Maybe do it a little more private next time?


Title: Re: Man caught pleasuring self in meat aisle
Post by: Ed, Ego and Superego on December 17, 2013, 01:08:12 PM
Well you read all those marinades and it does say "Rub on Meat".  So who can blame him.


Title: Re: Man caught pleasuring self in meat aisle
Post by: retrorussell on December 17, 2013, 02:49:59 PM
Caught red-handed.. or white-handed?


Title: Re: Man caught pleasuring self in meat aisle
Post by: Gst0395 on December 17, 2013, 03:52:30 PM
Caught red-handed.. or white-handed?
Oh snap!


Title: Re: Man caught pleasuring self in meat aisle
Post by: Umaril Has Returned on December 17, 2013, 04:40:27 PM
They should upgrade the charge to "unauthorized salami fondling!"

This story could have been worse, Indy. You said it was unauthorized salami fondling?  Well, think of it this way, he could have been pounding his pepperoni instead...   :twirl: :bouncegiggle:


Title: Re: Man caught pleasuring self in meat aisle
Post by: bob on December 17, 2013, 11:13:38 PM
talk about beating your meat...