Badmovies.org Forum

True, fiction, personally-centered or a world observation. Just some weird story, trivia, statement, or idea. Blank slate, go for it.



For instance:


Did you know in much of Mongolia it is illegal to put a diaper on a baby?

I have an uncle by marriage who spat up a good deal of blood inside a Taco Bell after a particularly pointy corn chip nicked open his esophagus when he was gulping his food.

I would eat spaghetti off a restroom floor for my weight in gold.

Horned toads cry hemoglobin.

I once saw condoms that claimed to be flavored like pumpkin pie.

When he was about four months old my son clearly said the word, "Socrates." Several of us heard it, but he never said it again.

One of the ideas to make Graceland profitable after Elvis' passing was reportedly to allow guests who paid for the privilege to use the bathroom where the King died, but the idea was vetoed by Priscilla.

Hunting is banned in Kenya except under special circumstances, and then only among certain tribal societies.

In middle school a boy like to brag about his neighbor's relative, who met his death after standing up in the bed of a moving pickup, on an expressway. He fell out, bounced down the interstate, and was run over by two vehicles.

My friend's dad was considering going into medicine, but as a teenager he was taken on a house call by a doctor who sensed he was on the fence about the idea of the healing arts as a profession, and on this in-home visit he picked insects out of an old man's festering diabetic leg ulcer, curing him of the desire to enter medicine.

Once when they were merry with the season, my cousin in law and his wife tried to talk my future husband and me into playing strip Scrabble, where the only words you could spell were dirty ones.

The other day I took my five-year-old into the "Family Friendly" restroom in Target, and she looked up and pointed out that fluffy blue-hued mold was growing prolifically from the ceiling air duct.

When I was a teenager I was hanging with my fella, and I played this (very) old record he had of chants to Kali, and those chants were so intense they were terrifying.He wasn't afraid of anything and it even got to him.

Hippos sweat pink.

Exposure to the color red is dangerous for those with high blood pressure.

It's widely reported that in private the Queen of England routinely uses the eff-word.

The absorbent interior of a wet baby diaper is extremely flame resistant.

Circa 3:00 AM is the most meaningful time to visit the chapel and long barracks at the Alamo.

In the 1990s the CIA conducted genetic tests on Saddam Hussein, after he used his own blood to write out verses in the Koran in personal letters he sent out internationally. A DNA profile was thus created and later used (along with fingerprint analysis) to make absolutely sure it was actually Saddam the army flushed out of that hole in the desert.

The word "virgin" is stupid.

When I was a freshman in high school, I routinely wore an aviator's cap, goggles, and scarf to class, and regaled students with tales of my adventures as a World War I flying ace.
My mother taught at that school.
Poor woman.

I have seen "U.F.O."s 3 times.The first in 1970 looked like a very skinny blimp,the second time in 1994 it looked like a gray capsule type pill, the third time was in 1999-there were 2-these were the classic discs. All were daylight sightings. All had multiple witnesses.

I've got a rash on my backside  :question:

Way back 2014 I had a severe allergy to alcohol, my whole buddy has some rashes and I had a fever. I had been drinking and partying for 3 consecutive days.  :cheers:

That's called DT's. The rash is from sweating out the booze. Trust me-I know.  :wink:

I think I'm in trouble now with a rash and I don't drink alcohol.  :wink:

Actually, the rash on your sitter is called "monkeybutt" in America and is a common complaint of truck drivers, clerical workers, and others who spend way too much time sitting on their hineys!  You can actually purchase "Anti-monkeybutt Powder" at most truck stops.

Well, time to get up now: my hiney's telling me so  :wink:

Here’s something weird.  Maybe one of you can make some sense of it:

Earlier this year, my husband and I were on a weekend vacation with my friend and her husband and we stopped at a roadside cave tour in Iowa.  We arrived just as a tour was gathering and were able to catch the tail end of the group after stopping at the bathroom.  We were right behind an Asian family of 5 – teenage kids, a mom & dad and a grandma.  We were really far back in the tour group and could barely hear the guide because grandma was taking her time walking through the uneven terrain and narrow cave passages.  We weren’t mad through, we felt a little bad for her and wondered if she didn’t speak very good English because there were several signs posted at the entrance and in a few spots throughout the cave clearly stating “Do Not Touch” certain parts of the walls, some even cited a $50 fine, and she was making zero efforts to keep her hands off the walls while walking through.

Most of the tour was normal and enjoyable.  We were able to hear bits and pieces of what the guide said and were enjoying being in the back not worrying if we were holding up anyone while looking at the formations.  My husband really took advantage of being in the back, trailing behind and farting in the cave.

Here comes the weird part though – we get closer to the end in a larger area so we were able to hear and see the guide point out a group of stalagmites  on the side that were “safe” to touch because they had already been ruined by people touching them throughout the years.  We were all encouraged to feel the smooth bumpy texture which had shiny knobs at the top from all the years of abuse.  Most of the tour group got in a quick, polite, finger sweep on one or two of them and moved on.  Then we got to grandma.  Grandma grabbed as many of the stalagmites as she could get her hands on and feverishly fondled them like arcade game joysticks… then she bent forward and rubbed her face on them.. and licked them…  and did what I could only describe as fellate them.  This went on for well over a minute, and she didn’t seem to care that we were staring at her in shock while she did this.  Actually, my friend’s husband and I were staring in shock, looking back and forth from grandma and to each other to silently validate that we were both truly seeing what we were seeing.  My friend is a nurse, so she’s really gotten down to ability to have a calm and serene expression while crazy stuff is going on.  So when I initially looked at her to see her reaction and saw none, I thought I must be seeing things, but then her husband’s face confirmed it.  My husband was still way in the back farting in the cave.  After what seemed like too long, one of the family members rushed grandma away, but in a way that seemed like this was something they were used to.

It didn’t stop there though.  Grandma had one more surprise for us.  The very last stretch of the cave had soft clay walls.  We didn’t hear the guide invite us to touch them, and no one else seemed to be doing it, and they didn’t appear to have finger marks, so I assume touching was not allowed.  But grandma makes her own rules, and ran her fingers through the soft clay, scraped up handfuls, and put them in the pockets of her windbreaker.  When she had her fill, she stopped and ate a dollop of clay off her finger, and I swear she looked at us and winked mischievously when she did this.

It was the most bizarre and hilarious thing I’ve seen in a while.  We couldn’t figure out if grandma was OCD and just had to touch things she wasn’t supposed to, or if she had some ancient knowledge about the magically amazing health and beauty benefits of eating natural cave minerals and rubbing them all over yourself.

Wow. Paquita-I don't know what to say about that. It sounds like the start of a H.P.Lovecraft story. That's just-I dunno.
Thanks for giving me fodder for nightmares!  :bluesad:

Genghis Khan has 16 million living descendants today.
Which means that he is almost halfway towards replacing the total number of people he killed!

BUT! The big question is-are they as charming as him?   :question:

HA!!

I remember that old slogan: "Four out of five dentists surveyed prefer sugarless gum for their patients who chew gum."

BUT - what about that FIFTH dentist?  What did he know that the other's didn't? 
And what did they do to him for possessing this secret knowledge?

What's weird is that I'm this sleepy and still up. May Morpheus endow your repose with visions of Ryhellum, may Destruction, Death and Despair stay far away, may Desire never tease you with his/her wiles, may blind Destiny never hand you his book, and may Delirium quit reminding me of my cousin Alison, back before she got sober. Zzzleep well, all.

And I hope Martin Tenbones watches over you as you sleep.

Here you go: https://www.somethingweird.com/ (https://www.somethingweird.com/)