Badmovies.org Forum

Have you ever wondered what a film would look like...if done with the exact same script.......but done in a manner that was............different? Like,say, "The brain from planet Areios", and every one was dressed like clowns. No, not acting like clowns, we have that! I mean ,say, "The night of the living dead" as a Wagnerian opera? (Who would write the music,A. Loydd Webber?) how about "Tommy" as performed by mimes.......I'm sorry......no one deserves to be represented by mimes!  I'd still like to see "Star Trek: First Contact done the WWF.(With Capt. Lou Albano as Capt. Picard). These, and other wierdnesses are possable, if we only try. I'm game, how bout you?

I was always fascinated by Charles Schultz's suggestion that War and Peace was a good subject for hand-puppet theatre . . . .
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I think a talking-animal version, ala BABE, of Battlefield Earth could work:  Ostriches to play the John Travolta aliens, various vermin to play the Earth people . . .
"It's a Wonderful Life" done by death-metal/goregrind band members . . . .
"Night of the Lepus", onstage by the Royal Shakespeare Company of Stratford-on-Avon:  Each rabbit would be five actors with wire masks and appendages, ala EQUUS . ...
Ingmar Bergman comes out of retirement to direct the remake of Plan 9, to be shot in Sweden with Liv Ullman in the Vampira role .. . .

Mr. F. - are you psychic? I actually live in East Yorkshire! I presume you are reffering to the said Python sketch, in which the good ladies performed "Camp On Blood Island", to be followed by the Womens Institute re-enacting "Nazi War Atrocities", and more to the point, they even proposed re-doing the Japanese attack on Pearl Harbor, said battle to be fought with handbags. I think the Pythons came up with an unbeatable "different" way. "Sam Peckinpah's Salad Days". A very genteel English lawn party goes bloodily awry - a lightly tapped tennis ball causes gouts of blood to shoot from the hand it hits. English gentlemen wrestle with lions? and are torn to bloody pieces. A croquet ball causes absolute mayhem - you get the idea. Of course we would have to think of a way of bringing Sam back. I would like to see Sam Raimi directing a nice, sensitive version of "The Sound Of Music". It couldn't get much more perverted though when I think about it, I mean it already has nuns, goats, Nazis and children so...so...perfect that they must die in the foulest way imaginable. I shall ponder on the details overnight.

I always wanted to see Matrix done with this cast:
Neo: Don Knotts
Morpheus:Chris Rock
Agent Smith:Jerry Sienfeld ("what's the deal with the matrix?")
Trinity: Tim Curry

Spooky

I've always imagined the 3 Stooges doing a mean adaptaion of Apocolypse Now. Curly would be Col. Kurtz, natch, and Moe would be Sheen's character. Larry would be the one who gets impaled: "Hey, look, they're only sti-- Nyaaahh!"

I'm part of an amateur comedy group, and one bit on one of our CDs involves Quentin Tarantino's "3 Little Pigs," with John Travolta, Samuel L. Jackson, and Tarantino himself as the pigs (with Quentin getting the self-indulgent role of the third pig), and of course, Harvey Keitel as the Wolf. *Shameless Plug* If you want to check it out, you can go to our website at http://demonsofstupidity.hollywood.com/ *Shameless plug*.

I don't even want to think about that one.

How about JFK in the Bizzaro Universe (like in the old Superman comics): "Front and to the right *Click* Front and to the right *click* Front and to the right..."

King Kong with Charleton Heston as Kong and Everyone else is a monkey.

Indepence Day set during the Civil War.

Akira featuring the cast of Pokemon.

Clerks' Dante and Randal in the Blair Witch Project.

Star Wars with Christopher Walken as Hans Solo (that actually almost happened)

"th Lion King" with the cast of Kimba the White Lion.  Wait a minute...

Dante: ~Whiny Voice~ "But I don't want to leave the tent!"
Randal: "Why cause it would be a change!?!?! You just can't handle change can you Dante!?  I'm going to look for the hermaphrodite sex witch!"


hehehehe
I think it could work!

"I say, what a super day!"
"Gosh, yes!"
"GAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHH!!"
With that out of the way, I'd like to suggest The Crow with a soundtrack done by Toybox.  If you don't know of the glories of Toybox, immediately dl some of their stuff, it's the worst, most vacuous pop ever done and would go absolutely horribly with the entire bat-farting atmosphere.  
"Tarzan is handsome, Tarzan is strong!  He's really cute and his hair is long!"

 Just recently I had the bizzare idea of replacing the main cast members of "Star Trek, The Next Generation" with those of "The Love Boat"....I think that it was the similiarly bald heads of both the respective captains that got me....I think that "Gopher" would have to be the one unfortunate enough to take the place of Wesley Crusher. [That kid should have immediately been issued a blazing, red shirt and made to accompany every "away mission" ever conducted while he was on board....for purely educational reasons....honest...."Come aboard. We're expecting you"....heh heh heh...]

There's a short film floating around out there called "Apocalypse Pooh".  It's the Winnie the Pooh cartoon overdubbed with the voices from APOCALYPSE NOW.

Haven't you seen the Saturday Night Live from the Early Nineties with Patrick Stewart!  They do a sketch like that.  And the original Captain even makes a cameo.  It was hilarious.
Captain: "Worf, I hear your beating all the passengers at shuffle board"
Worf (as played by Phil Hartman): I must defend my Klingon heritage"
Captain: "But old people and young children..."
Worf: "the weak and the cowardly have no place in the game of shuffleboard!"

"And now for something compleatly different"...I'm impressed! Glad my post inspired you guys! Stefan: Should have caught that one. The Statner Trek stuff was classic too.  Yes, Hair, give the kid a red shirt!...the bullseye is optional. Steve: Maby great minds dement alike. Sooooo many ideas that make me LoL just to read them. Brilliant! I did a post once where if you switched the Lost in space Characters with Gilligans island, you coulden't tell the differance....The love boat trak was good! Ah...i love the smell of cooking braincells in the morning.

  I wish I would've caught that, Stefan!  ["Score one for you, good robot us's!"] It sounds like it was pretty good! Truth to tell though, I was so turned off after seeing such a well respected, Shakespearian actor as Patrick Stewart playing a doctor and detailing the joys of....well....let's just leave that one "behind", shall we?....I didn't even bother with the rest of the show. Sometimes bad really is bad.... However, thanks for letting me know about it, maybe I'll try to catch it the next time it reruns on Comedy Central.

The single greatest line ever spoken by Capt. Picard:

Captain [to Wesly Crusher]: "Mr. Crusher, shut up!"

Mr. Flange - I'm surrounded by psychotic loonies - I LOVE IT! Now there must be an even more tasteless way of making The Life Of Brian get even further up da Christian fundamentalists nostrils. My brain cells are frying tonight!

You heard that one of the original titles they threw around was "Jesus Christ: Lust for Glory"

How about that for upsetting.

How about Anton LaVey in "Jesus Christ: Superstar?"

Both excellent. When John Cleese was interviewed on UK tv on the release of Brian, a religious person had thoughtfully brought along 30 pieces of silver, and accused Mr. Cleese of blasphemy. Cleese then gave the gentleman a few seconds to be smug, before flooring him by pointing out that Jesus comes over in TLOB rather well. The movie in fact has a pop at organised religion in general, not Jesus himself. The smug smile quickly disappeared, and he had to admit he hadn't even seen the movie - only "heard about it". Brilliant - oh how our household laughed! Lust For Glory - priceless!

Larry would have to be Hooper, but who would be Brody and Quint?  That be the hard one.

Now that's pretty scary.  Not only would she kill 'em, she would also diss their hive decor.

How can you think differently.  Curly isn't tough enough to be quint.  The shark shall be played by Joe Besser.

The little Rascals star in the Big Chill.

How about Curly as the shar-- Oh, wait, that'd be Jabberjaw. :)

As someone who has great respect for Jesus, i'd not "Go there" in humor, if for nothing else, well, respect. However, what John Cleese said was right. Jesus was left alone, and it was human nature that got its royal comeuppance. One of the best gags was the "Bigges Dickus" gag Michael Pailen did. I can't help think they got that one in one take! I'm amazed any of them could keep a strait face! There are lots of end credit songs that the audience walks out on...but "Always look on the bright side of life " is not one of them!

Moe as Quint! He had the bad attitude, after all. Which leaves Curley as Brody....hummmm. Okey...which Curley? The best, or Shemp or Joe Darita?

The best Curly would have to be the shark.  :-)

Got to agree about Biggus Dickus. I also loved "Are you the Judaen Popular Front"? - "f**k off ! We're the Judaen Peoples Front".  "Whatever happened to the Popular Front, Reg?"  "He's over there"

One of the best gags in Life of Brian. Now, if only the PLO would get like that, it might make them too busy to creat havoc....Oh,well.  Yeah!...Shemp as brody, Moe as Quint, Curley as the shark, and Larry as hooper. And Joe Besser as the boat! Lord, i love it. If nothing else, do a "Whats up tiger lily?" on JAWS. Talk about entering an alternate universe!

No Mr. Flange you mean The Very Popular Peoples Front For The Liberation Of The People That Live In Israel That Used To Be Called Palestine. (I think.) We're already in an alternate universe isn't them?