OT: What Are They Teaching Our Kids Today?

[BeyondTheGrave]

That is some horror stories Ulthar but very true I have seen much of what you said.

 While it does depend on the person to make education useful or not I feel it also depends on money. My mother and grandfather pay for my college I don't work. So I try me hardest. I go to class everyday I maybe missed 3 absent in a semester and have a solid GPA of 3.1 The reason I say it sucks because I can't do much. Can't take trips because don't have that extra cash. Forget about joining clubs and such while the Criminal Justice(Which is my major) does offer alot I not interest in most of it because my mother works for the PD and I have seen most of what they have to offer.

I think education is important but teacher are either way to hard and what I mean hard I am not saying test or homework wise I mean their over the hill and don't know how to teach. or just to easy like you don't have to come to class and give no test what so ever or it a open book test. I t hard to find the middle ground teacher that know how to balance. I have 2 teachers in my 3 years so far that I could remember their names and said I learned alot from them. Maybe its my college or Major but so far I haven't found it that great.

[Scottie]

Dean wrote:

"Hey Scottie, do you have one of those cool eyeglass things that all cinematographers always seem to have?

What about a cool looking lightmeter so you can jump around set with a funky gadget?"

>
>
>

No, those eye glass thingies are super expensive. Imagine paying $1000 for a lens that only works with your eye, and now imagine paying $0 for using your eye. I'm sad to say it, but I've been known to actually use that directorial hand motion where you frame up a scene with your hands in a rectangular 2.33:1 box. At certain lengths from your body, that hand shape will actually emulate different focal lengths the same way those expensive necklace lenses will. Only my hands don't cost me a dime.

And yes I do swing a light meter from my neck. I'm so f'n cool. I also carry a pair of work gloves, a roll of gaf tape, and a pocket lined with clothes pins, er, I mean C-47 media attachment clips. Man, I sound more like an out of work PA on a big set than a DP on a small set. Oh well, the world wasn't lit with one bulb.

And, to further the discussion of the fallacies of education, let me point out that some people benefit from a little coddling. Darwin poked bugs with sticks in class before he accomplished anything.

[Rombles]

Scottie Wrote:
.....
>
> And, to further the discussion of the fallacies of
> education, let me point out that some people
> benefit from a little coddling. Darwin poked bugs
> with sticks in class before he accomplished
> anything.



Imagine, though, if Darwin had been told "well, you've done nothing but poke some bugs with sticks for the last 3 or 4 years, but here's your degree anyway", would he have developed the lust for knowledge that led to the Theory of Evolution?

[Rombles]

ulthar Wrote:
........> I also once had a student, who failed to attend
> class except for test day, turn in a paper covered
> with violent drawings, poetry and REDRUM and stuff
> like that.  Maybe it would have been cool for an
> art assignment, but as a chemistry test, it was
> not a good performance.  I turned that one over to
> the department chair.  .......


I did something similar in some of my final high school exams.....
wrote some really cool poetry (damn I wish I could get a copy of it!) in my Maths exam, and in my History exam, I wrote an explanation of the fact that I would much rather be out making a really great crappy movie, instead of sitting in this hell-hole doing this stupid exam, and did the examiner marking this by any chance have a video camera I could borrow with which to make this cinematic masterpiece.

I got a letter from the Education Department a few weeks later, warning me for using "inappropriate language directed at an examiner".

Needless to say I didn't go to Uni (Or college, or whatever you guys call in in the USA).

This was 14 years ago, and since then my printing apprenticeship has served me well, allowing me to earn more than either of my siblings, both of whom went to University.

[trekgeezer]

I never went to college (just trade school), and I now work for a division of the state university and I swear I am more literate than 2/3 of the PHD's that work where I do. In fact working there has sort of dimmed my view of higher education.

I instilled in both my kids to never equate intelligence with the level of someone's education.

[LH-C]

I'm a photography major, and the only reason that I'm in college is because of a turning in the photography field where you can barely get a job (with magazines, newspapers, etc.) as a photographer if you don't have at the very least a bachelor's. My GPA is 3.72 (hard earned too), but I worry about not being a good enough photographer; that all of my truly invaluable education will have been pursued in vain.

[Ash]

trek_geezer Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
I instilled in both my kids to never equate
> intelligence with the level of someone's
> education.
>
> --------------------------------


Fantastic point trek!

I'll have to write that one down.

[peter johnson]

     Whew!
     Looks like this topic really touches a nerve --
     However, my original point that this supposedly "true" stuff is a made-up joke still stands, for while interesting, ulthar's story of a verbal faux pas in 4th grade does not equal citing real funny stuff/wrong answers on tests by older students.
     ulthar has very good things to say about the current bad state of modern "education", and disturbing things about stupidity being rewarded, but he provides no funny answers.
     This stuff, like the stuff in the Uncle John's Bathroom Reader, like the stuff circulating that's supposed to be "real" from "real'" insurance claims (eg.  "The sad eyed old man looked at me as he disappeared under my bumper -- I had to swerve several times to hit him!"), etc. etc. etc. ad infinum/ad nauseum, are just old jokes being recycled.
     It ain't true, folks, and it's been around forever -- see www.snopes.com for further insight.
peter johnson/denny crane

[ulthar]

peter johnson Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
>
> but he provides no funny answers.
>      

Ah, but to provide the specific funny answers, I'd need copies of those tests; sorry, I am just trying to go from memory here, and it has been several years.  That's why I was giving the gist. To me at least, aliens causing beta particles to bounce off gold foil is pretty funny and certainly not anything we covered in class.  As is "sodium wants to be happy."  I can remember sharing some gut-busting stuff with my wife while grading exams, so it was there.

I'll see if I happen to have any papers laying around, but a couple of moves later, and anything like that I might have saved would have long since been thrown away.

[Just Plain Horse]

I think the saddest thing is how it seems even education has become a business... trading the promise of a better career in for cash. Uh, if you're already struggling to make ends meet, how the hell are you going to afford to take the time, money and effort to work your ass off to get through refrigeration school?

[BoyScoutKevin]

Well, that's what you get when you post something on this board. You never know what you'll get.
And I certainly didn't expect to get responses like these from my first post. But, as I have some more "Bizarre Science Test Answers," from the same source, I'll post a few of them each week, as long as they last. If anything, I hope they provide a needed laugh for someone who needs one.

Q: How can you delay milk turning sour?
A: Keep it in the cow.

Q: What causes the tides in the ocean?
A: The tides are a fight between the Earth and the Moon. All water tends to flow towards the moon, because there is no water on the moon, and nature hates a vacuum. I forget where the sun joins in this fight.

Q: What are steroids?
A: Things for keeping carpets still on the stairs.

To be continued . . .

[BoyScoutKevin]

Q: What happens to your body as you age?
A: When you get old, so do your bowels and you get intercontinental.

Q: What happens to a boy when he reaches puberty?
A: He says good-bye to his boyhood and looks forwaord to his adultery.

Q: Name a major disease associated with cigarettes.
A: Premature death.

To be continued . . .

[BoyScoutKevin]

Q: What is artificial insemination?
A: When the farmer does it to the bull instead of the cow.

Q: How are the main parts of the body categorized? (e.g., abdomen)
A: The body consists of three parts--the brainium, the borax, and the abdominal cavity. The brainium contains the brain, the borax contains the heart and lungs, and the abdominal cavity contains the five bowels: A, E, I, O, and U.

Q: What is the fibula?
A: A small lie.

To be continued . . .

[The Conqueroo]

You Know,These Things Pop Up From Time to Time And It Makes Me Wonder:Do Kids really Answer Questions Like That Or Does Someone Actually Make That Stuff ass A Joke.

[BTM]

> As a former college chemistry professor, I'd like
> to state for the record that I've seen Freshman
> (18 year olds) give answers that were very similar
> to these.  In that case, though, it's not cute;
> it's sad.

Yeah, that IS sad...

BTW, whoa, you taught chemistry?  Cool, didn't know that! :)

Hey, can you answer something for me (I'm a writer so I come up with all sorts of bizarre questions), but here's a basic one, you know how in some movie the bad guy is about to be caught when he throws a flask down on the floor, it shatters, filling the room with obscuring mist (smoke?) allowing him to get away?  What can of substance could do that in real life?  (One guy I know told me a flask full of dry and a bit water would work, but seems to me you'd need a hell of a lot of dry ice to quickly fill up a room...)

Just curious... :)