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Author Topic: The All Midget Remake  (Read 7367 times)
Andrew
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« on: July 10, 2006, 08:03:35 PM »

This has come up before, but there are a number of movies just screaming to be remade with an all midget cast:

Top Gun
Rocky
The Terminator
Dawn of the Dead
Jaws
Saving Private Ryan
Singin' in the Rain
Kill Bill
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Andrew Borntreger
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« Reply #1 on: July 10, 2006, 08:51:21 PM »

Good topic Andrew.

Here is what I'd love to see with midgets:

Hero
Hard Boiled
Terms Of Endearment
The Matrix
The Dark Crystal
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« Reply #2 on: July 10, 2006, 09:59:06 PM »

TOP GUN?

SAVING PRIVATE RYAN?

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« Reply #3 on: July 11, 2006, 01:45:22 AM »

Well, Tom Cruise isn't too tall to begin with. Perhaps he could star in the remake as well?
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« Reply #4 on: July 11, 2006, 04:38:44 AM »

How beautifully wrong.

Watching Beyond Thunderdome the other night and seeing the antics of Master Blaster on the big screen actually got me thinking of what happened to midgets in movies.  And then a trailer for Little Man came on tv and I got kind of worried...

Anyways, some movies that could well do with a midget cast:

Any Godzilla film.
Goodfellas.  Or maybe really any hardcore gangster film
Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas [just to add to the insanity even further]
Austin Powers 2 [and have the only tall cast member to play Mini-me]
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« Reply #5 on: July 11, 2006, 06:01:07 AM »

Hmmm . . . how about these:

* JOURNEY TO THE CENTER OF THE EARTH
* SHOWGIRLS
* BONNIE AND CLYDE
* ENTER THE DRAGON
* STAR WARS
* X-MEN
* FIDDLER ON THE ROOF
* THE GODFATHER
* GIGLI
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« Reply #6 on: July 11, 2006, 07:19:48 AM »

Batman Begins
Charlies Angels
Nosferatu (how creepy would that be!)
Dead Alive

...and...dare I say it?  Road Warrior

Oh hell...I will be even more politically incorrect:

How about Cujo but they can use a poodle or some other small dog?
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« Reply #7 on: July 11, 2006, 07:48:51 AM »

Oooo, midgets in gangster films. Add the Last Man Standing to the list.

For that matter, an all-midget Fistfull of Dollars would be pretty good too.

If we're talking war movies, how about The Great Escape? Or maybe Kelly's Heroes. Oooo, an all-midget Dirty Dozen!

Come to think of it, are there any more well-known midget actors? I mean, you used to have Billy Barty, Warwick Davis (I guess he's still around), Herve Villechaize, David Rappaport and some others who pretty much appeared anywhere you needed little people. Today, Verne Troyer is about the only one who is really famous.
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« Reply #8 on: July 11, 2006, 10:00:55 AM »

I'm liking all these suggestions, but I think any remake should have a title to match. In addition to the actual (abandoned) project to make Hang 'Em Not So High, for example, certain other Westerns ought to be renamed:

The Midget With No Name
Fist Full of Dimes
The Diminutive Seven
Heaven's Tiny Gate
The Midget Who Shot Little Imbalance
Forty Derringers
Not So High Noon
The Small T
The Short Train Robbery
True Bit

Obviously, this applies to other genres as well. I don't think a remake of Showgirls would even be legal, but if it were, the remake title should be obvious:

Lowgirls
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« Reply #9 on: July 11, 2006, 10:33:50 AM »

AndyC Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------

Come to think of it, are there any more well-known
> midget actors?


Yep,
How about Tony Cox?


He could star in a thug/gangsta midget movie similar to Boyz n Da Hood.
They could do drive by's on tricycles and Big Wheels.

Or how about that midget guy who hung around with Kramer in Seinfeld?
What was his real name?

Wiki page: People with Dwarfism
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« Reply #10 on: July 11, 2006, 11:37:22 AM »

I,m only 5'2", so this thread kinda hits a little too close to home for me.I enjoyed Terror of Tiny Town,though. I'm not too small-everyone else is too big!
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« Reply #11 on: July 11, 2006, 12:22:16 PM »

Inyarear:

Nice list!  How about these?

* MY NAME IS LOW-BODY
* RIO LOW-BO
* LITTLE JAKE
* THE SHORTIST
* TRUE SHORT
* MY DARLING CLEMEN-TINY
* THE SHORT RIDERS
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« Reply #12 on: July 11, 2006, 12:23:29 PM »

I'd like to see a remake of THIRTEEN DAYS, the retelling of the Cuban Missile Crisis, with an all midget/dwarf cast.  That would be fascinating.
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« Reply #13 on: July 11, 2006, 01:26:52 PM »

How about a remake of THE AIR UP THERE with an all-midget cast?
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« Reply #14 on: July 11, 2006, 01:30:54 PM »

"Oooo, midgets in gangster films"- AndyC

When I was a wee lad, there was a movie called Buggsy Malone wheere kids played all the parts.  Not midgets, but close.

I persoanlly would like Conan with an all midget cast

-Ed
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