B-movies Seldom Reviewed

[clockworkcanary]

When considering what I want to review, I always shoot for films that are seldom (or not even) covered by any site so far.  I always check to see what's out there before I get started, just so I'm not covering the same ground that's been covered a million times.  Sure, sometimes I find a small blurb or three sentence paragraph, but I hardly consider that a proper review.   For example, before I did the review for The Black Hole, I was surprised that there wasn't a whole lot out there about it online.

So, I've been trying to make myself a list of bad movies, b-movies, and cult classics that are good contenders that are less-often-reviewed ...feel free to contribute to the list...

Rock'n'Roll High School: Ramones take over a school -hell yeah!
Hard Bodies: definitely a USA up all night flick
G.I. Joe the Movie: rewriting the origins and bringin in Don Johnson
Wes Craven's Deadly Friend: Frankenstein's monster in the body of a RL robo pac-man
Trick or Treat: Skippy uses backwards music to summon an undead rock star
The Comeback: failed singer stays at a crappy hotel with a ghost and a couple murderers
My Bloody Valentine: Canadian slasher in some mines
Hellraiser III: Hell on Earth: retarded cynobites arrive on earth
Nothing But Trouble: unfunny komedy
Avenging Force: a ninja, a commando, a barbarian, and an old man in a hawk mask hunt special forces guy in a swamp
Night School: who's killing all the students?
Return to Horror High: George Cloony bites it in another school massacre
Cat People: meow
Terror Train: New Years eve on a train ...uh boy
Dream a little Dream: Goonie body switch
Vamp: vampire strippers?
Critters: gremlins rip off
Police Academy 5: Miami Beach (any of them really)
Mazes and Monsters: D&D propaganda
Midnight Express: Turkish prison propaganda
Reefer Madness: pot propaganda
The Hand: missing hand comes back on its own...and kills!
The Final Countdown: US Aircraft carrier goes back in time to just before Pearl Harbor invasion and...does nothing
Suburban Commando: Two words...Hulk Hogan
Ernest Scared Stupid
Loverboy: want extra anchovies on your pizza?
A Polish Vampire in Burbank
King Kong vs. Godzilla
Rawhead Rex (recently mentioned by a poster)
Nightbreed
Blood Beach: giant flower worm under the sand
Can't Buy Me Love: or maybe you can...
Shanghi Surprise: Madonna
Crimebusters
Eye for an Eye: old Chuck Norris flick
My Best friend is a Vampire: and the dorks who hunt him
Full Moon High: werewolves bite footballs
Teen Wolf Too: rinse-n-repeat w/o MJF

TV:
The Third Eye: Nick horror show
Tomorrow People: Nick sci fi show
You Can't Do That on Television: Nick komedy show
Three's a Crowd
Spiderman (70s)
Wonder Woman (70s)
She's the Sheriff

Bad Cartoons: Gary Coleman Show, Hammer-Man, Police Academy, Back to the Future, Flying House, Silver Hawks, She-Ra, Punky Brewster,

more to come...

[Kester Pelagius]

I don't know if you'd call all of them proper reviews but there's quite a few obscurities up at Mise-en-scen Crypt.  Just from the first list view page I have. . .

FUTURE WAR (1997)

INHUMANOID (1996)

KILLERS EROTICUS (2003)

The Warlord: Battle for the Galaxy (1998)

Aside from an expanded review of Inhumanoid I have up elsewhere that's not really been reviewed much.  Nor have the rest, and they could always use another viewpoint, as could the movies in this entry. . .

4 vampire movies you've never heard of!

My suggestion would be rather than compile a list Google your titles.  Odds are if you don't get a lot of reviews in the first 75 or so hits that it's not a movie that's been reviewed, much.  Hopefully.   

[Jordan]

Nah there's plenty of reviews out there for most of these flicks:
Check out www.mrqe.com
http://www.bmoviecentral.com/linkscaffe/
http://www.b-masters.com/main_index.html
www.imdb.com
www.rottentomatoes.com

That should snag you some reviews of these flicks.

On a side note, "Deadly Friend" is sadly not on DVD legitimately (if it is, someone please tell me) and is something that I am definitely going to seek out in the near future. If anyone finds a copy on eBay or elsewhere (VHS or otherwise) please let me know! 

[Andrew]

Most often, what I review is just because the urge hits me.  I do try to make sure I sample a variety of movies. 

In the past, I have seen several films that had my reviews as the only external link on IMDB.  That might not be proof of "the only review," but it definitely indicates that the movie is one less often viewed.  I do tend to avoid movies that were recently reviewed by another b-movie site or that have already seen a lot of coverage.  The latter is definitely the reason I have not written anything about "Battlefield Earth."  Once the dust settles a bit, I will have to roll up my sleeves and work on that one too.

[JaseSF]

I sometimes find I'm the only one who's covered certain TV Series episodes too. It's definitely about finding the time to do reviews for me. Used to write movie reviews for Scifilm too from time to time but increasing demands from other forces in my life meant I was watching less and less movies and it became difficult to even cover TV series for the site on a daily basis (of course I never actually planned daily, it just kind of happened that way). Now that I finally have some time,  I try and ensure I get a few movies in per week but I still rarely find the time anymore to write reviews aside from the daily TV File, and even that's hard to get in some days.

[Captain Tars Tarkas]

I think it's best just to review what you want, but some films are oversaturated in the amount of criticism.  Uwe Boll's films are universally attacked (and I will do them as well) so if you want to stand out you should steer clear.  I know that pretty much every SciFi Channel film will get reviewed by the Foywonder almost right after, but I don't let that stop me if there is one of them I want to do, as our styles are very different.  I haven't really seen anyone who has a similar style to clockworkcanary, except maybe Gangreen Widescreen, so almost anything he reviews will be from a different direction and worth checking out.

Also, old  action movies from the 1980s starring no one are a goldmine of barely reviewed films (especially if made in the Philipines), as is anything that hasn't been released to DVD, or only on one of the 20pack or 50pack cheapos.  Plus, Lifetime has tons of movies no one ever goes over airing constantly.  There are some babysitter seduction movies with horrid titles I am on the lookout for but haven't aired in the past few months.

[sideorderofninjas]

Covering movies that haven't been covered by any site is quite a task. 

Still most reviewers have such different styles you'll come away with each with a different take on the movie. 

[Famous Mortimer]

I wouldn't aim for newness, I'd aim for goodness. My reviewing style may well suck, but I just go for what takes my fancy and what I think would be fun to write about.

Saying that, "Trick or Treat" rules. Get it reviewed.

[clockworkcanary]

That's one reason I like this site - most of the content isn't overdone, yet the stuff isn't too obscure either.  I tend to write about stuff I like and preferably stuff I have in my library, but like I said, I always want to write about something that hasn't been covered to death elsewhere.  I don't particularly like to write about films that have been released in the last 5 years.  Most of the time, I like to review bad stuff I watched back in my teen years during the 80s as there's so much to choose from, I watched a lot of crummy movies back then, and add the nostalgia factor.

One thing I thought about doing is writing from a rather unorthadox perspective, like, for example, writing a review of a bad 80s action flick from a D&D perspective (China O'Brian rolls a d20, landing a crit with her bo staff on the drunken redneck; redneck #2 rolls a critical failure, attacking Dokota's fist with his face); writing a documentary as Mr. T (March of the Penguins fooo'); writing a horror review like I was Elmer Fudd (Fweddy vewses Jasown); or write a review of an 80s TnA flick from the perspective of an overzealous church lady.

[Kester Pelagius]

Also, old  action movies from the 1980s starring no one are a goldmine of barely reviewed films (especially if made in the Philipines), as is anything that hasn't been released to DVD, or only on one of the 20pack or 50pack cheapos.

And part of the fun is tracking down decent copies.

The Hollywood Video's in my area were apparently the last to have a clearance of their VHS stock.  I used to check in their every other week when folks started reporting about clearance sales in their area but, as mine seemed to be a Malingering Hector, I stopped.  Last time they had VHS they'd been cleared out of all the good stuff and the few titles (Deathstalker III, I really wanted that) left were, upon closer examination, revealed to be EP mode and, worse, looked to have been eaten by someone's player.

Sadly there's only a handful of stores that stock VHS and they're usually outlet stores or places like Big Lots, which have a random selection of remaindered titles.  If you really want to find those obscure titles that leaves Flea Markets, yard/rummage sales, and thrift stores.  You'd be surprised what you can sometimes find.  I've picked up some amazing deals at the Flea Market.  Anime titles still in the shrink wrap for 50 cents, a copy of Warlords for a couple bucks, The Second Civil War for 50 cents...  If you make a day of it with friends you can have a bit of fun.

[Andrew]

I have encountered the same thing at flea markets.  You will find one or two sellers with huge boxes of funky movies, that nobody else seems to want.  I do not know of any near my new  home, but definitely need to find some.