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Author Topic: Your Favorite Time-Life Commercials?  (Read 34092 times)
Menard
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« on: February 07, 2007, 11:49:43 PM »

On our local Pax/i/ion (they change names so frequently) affiliate, one can catch any number of their favorite infomercials. Get in shape with a Bowflex, life forever with a home super juicer, and relive all of you favorite hits from the 70s brought to you by Time-Life.

I find these half-hour Time-Life commercials to be entertaining. They provide a quickshot flashback with a look of some of the radio artists I may not have seen before, or even providing a snippet of a song I haven't heard in a while, or, say with the topic of country music, a look at a type of music to which I normally don't pay any attention to (Unless you count Shania Twain TeddyR).

Yep, there is a lot more entertaining programming on TV, but if I happen to come across one of these commercials, or am not interested in catching the news (they regularly have one on at 11 pm), they provide an interesting diversion for half an hour.

I'm not too certain which is my favorite. I like the ones which focus on the 70s, as I remember listening to a lot of these hits when they were on the radio, and they bring back memories. Though, musically, I prefer the singers/songwriters, the disco commercial is more visually entertaining.

Have any of you watched these commercials and do you have any favorites?
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CheezeFlixz
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« Reply #1 on: February 08, 2007, 12:41:02 AM »

OMFG somebody actually watches those things? Buggedout

On rare occasions I've been flipping through the 100's of channels we have nowadays and somehow found myself watching one of these brain-numbing-info-trash. About 5 or 10 minute into it, you snap and go WTF I'm watching a infomercial.

I swear if I ever see Billy Mays on the street I'm going walk up to him and punch him dead in the face, he has got to be the most annoying human on earth. It's his voice, sound like a side show caravel hack.

HI FOLKS IT'S BILLY MAYS HERE!! WE'VE GOT THE BEARDED LADY, JO JO THE DOG FACE BOY, CREATURE NEVER SEEN BY THE CIVILIZED WORLD!!! ALL FOR ONLY $19.95 .... BUT WAIT THERES MORE BUY NOW AND WE'LL INCLUDE THE TATTOO LADY, THE HUMAN PIN CUSHION AND AS A ADDED BONUS A SUPER SIZED TUB OF OXY CLEAN.
Don't just clean it, oxy clean it!!!
Operators are standing by ...

He's like the Ron (Ronco) Popeil of the 21st century.
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Yaddo 42
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« Reply #2 on: February 08, 2007, 04:59:36 AM »

As much as I hate infomercials, sometimes they amuse me, often for the wrong reasons.

There's one on the local NBC station right now hosted by Peter Noone from Herman's Hermits. As usual an aged icon (rock star/TV actor/pop idol/has been) is paired with a female co-host who looks about 25 at most. Just plug in a new hottie every few years to jabber with Roger Daltry, Barry Williams, Davy Jones, Leif Garrett, David Cassidy or whoever needs a paycheck, career boost after rehab, or still looks presentable on camera decades later.

Yet she gushes (as per the script, since they seem to all use the same template) about growing up on ALL these great songs by the original artists, yeah only if her parents made her listen to nothing but what they listened to when they were young. After seeing Little Miss Sunshine, I've had to explain to some not dumb 20-somethings not only who Rick James was but that he was a real person and not some made up character from a Dave Chapelle skit. Their musical memory is very short and selective.

Do they still do the demonstrations comparing worn out vinyl LPs to the superior sound quality of CDs. Hell I'm surprised how few 20-somethings can even figure out how to operate a turntable, then I remember that they had tapes or CDs for their first music sources, even for the kiddie songs and read-a-long story books.

As for my favorites, there was one that had a clip of Eric Carmen performing "All By Myself" on IIRC, The Old Grey Whistle Test while over his shoulder were two pale skinned girls clearly drugged out of their minds lurching along to some tempo other than the one of the song he's lip-syncing to. Funny every time.

There's a soul collection show hosted by Peabro Bryson that I like a little, since I only know the more popular songs. Plus they have a clip of Solomon Burke dancing very awkwardly in front of a typical 60s-70s variety show light show wearing an ugly suit. Like a one man Temptations or Four Tops show. Good song and Burke is an awesome voice, just weird and slightly funny to see this great talent  "playing the game" to get on TV back then.

Never bought one of these offers, probably never will. They play so much stuff I can hear on tons of oldies and Adult Contemporary stations. I want more off the beaten path stuff usually, whatever the genre. Besides the Rhino Music collections I've seen are much more interesting.

Edit to add some spacing and the word "path".
« Last Edit: February 09, 2007, 05:54:02 AM by Yaddo 42 » Logged

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CheezeFlixz
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« Reply #3 on: February 08, 2007, 10:18:50 AM »

Remember K-Tel Records?
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Menard
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« Reply #4 on: February 08, 2007, 11:49:00 AM »

OMFG somebody actually watches those things? Buggedout

I just have broadcast television. ABC, NBC, CBS, KET, and PAX (ion) are all that I get. Sometimes, depending on the day, the infomercials are the most entertaining thing to watch. How many times can we sit through Ron Popeil saying 'set it, and forget it'? TeddyR


Remember K-Tel Records?

The K-Tel records were fun compilations. Of course, there were other compilation records, but none of them had K-Tel's advertising or scream-at-you coloration that grabbed one's attention immediately.

When you brought up Ron Popeil, it started me to thinking about all of the Ronco commercials we had in the 70s, especially around Christmas.

Make your vinyl LPs sound like new again with the automatic record cleaner.

Breathe fresh air in a smoky room, just like the great outdoors, with the smokeless ashtray.

Fish anywhere, anytime, with Popeil's Pocket Fisherman.


Some of those were memorable commercials, especially with how much they would oversell the product.


One of the earliest of those types of commercials I recall was popular in the 60s and 70s. I don't recall if it was called the Veg-i-matic or what, but it was that little white vegetable slicer that you pushed down on to slice or dice youe veggies. I do believe that was where the phrase 'it slices, it dices' originated.
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CheezeFlixz
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« Reply #5 on: February 08, 2007, 12:12:50 PM »

It was the Chop-o-matic .... a lot of stuff seemed to be the "o-matic" You know that is one of the items they made that really worked, I have one and we use it all the time. It's not a RONCO one I think it was got at 'Bed, Bath and Beyond' by the bride a few years ago. But that might be the one thing that made money for him.
There was also the "Inside the Shell Egg Scrambler" how freakin lazy must you be? The "Dial-O-Matic Food Slicer"

Remember the 'Bass-o-matic' from SNL (when it was good)

What gets me is that if these things are so great then why aren't they sold in stores? Guess it's easier to stick you with it over the phone, as after you pay S/H which is never included and always over priced. If the product sucks you have to pay to return and your out your original S/H and you've spent more the the $19.95 introductory price.

And regardless of the pitchman on it, the OLD way is nearly aways in black and white and made to look far worst than it ever is in real life. Like frying a egg in about 2 cups of lard and it's slopping everywhere or that pasta cooker where they boil some veggies down to a pulp and say oh look this does it so much better. anyway you get the point.

Sorry you reduced to watching infomercials, that should be illegal!

EDIT: When I was a kid I ordered some K-Tel records, back in the day they'd send it with a bill instead of paying over the phone. My Dad was none to happy as I had no money and he made me send them back. They kept sending the bill for like a year after that. Needless to say it's was painful and I didn't do it again.

« Last Edit: February 08, 2007, 12:17:28 PM by CheezeFlixz » Logged

Poogie
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« Reply #6 on: February 08, 2007, 12:17:54 PM »

Not only do you get the vegamatic..."That's not all, you also get this set of Ginsu Knives".
I just watched part of one of these the other night..It was the 70's and 80's music, some of it might of even been 60's. There were some good songs I haven't heard in a long time and there was 150 of them. I came to the computer and chickened out....Oh well....KRLA here I come.    TeddyR
We have a "As seen on TV" store here in the mall near us. They usually have most of the stuff we see on these informercials.
« Last Edit: February 08, 2007, 12:21:06 PM by Poogie » Logged

Boogie...Boogie...Boogie...Boogie...  
Dennis
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« Reply #7 on: February 08, 2007, 08:49:06 PM »

As part of my previous job in the sash and door dept. of a lumber company I would occasionally have to man a booth at the home show in the L.A. Convention Center. On one occasion I was shocked and dismayed to discover Mr Oxy-clean himself right next door, if anything he is even more annoying in person then on TV, I agree with Cheezeflixz , after about four hours of listening to him I wanted him to die with festering boils.
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CheezeFlixz
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« Reply #8 on: February 08, 2007, 09:10:26 PM »

As part of my previous job in the sash and door dept. of a lumber company I would occasionally have to man a booth at the home show in the L.A. Convention Center. On one occasion I was shocked and dismayed to discover Mr Oxy-clean himself right next door, if anything he is even more annoying in person then on TV, I agree with Cheezeflixz , after about four hours of listening to him I wanted him to die with festering boils.

I would have paid your bail if you'd gone over there and gave him a big "KABOOM!" I don't know what it is about him but, I can't hit mute fast enough when I here.

Oh BTW I've done a number of shows at the LACC we use to go over the Pantry to eat.
« Last Edit: February 08, 2007, 09:13:02 PM by CheezeFlixz » Logged

LilCerberus
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« Reply #9 on: February 09, 2007, 12:38:56 AM »

There was this one back in the mid '80s I used to love for Santo Gold.

It was dotted with highlights from Blood Circus http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0088824/

Update: I just found a better link, with a better description
http://infomercial.tvheaven.com/santogold.htm
« Last Edit: February 09, 2007, 12:48:38 AM by LilCerberus » Logged

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Yaddo 42
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« Reply #10 on: February 09, 2007, 06:14:39 AM »

I bought a smokeless ashtray for my dad one year when I was little and wanted him to stop smoking. I think he used the actual ashtray and "lost" the noise maker filter system after a few weeks when he got tired of me asking if he was using it and my parents got tired of the whine of the motor.

When I was learning to cook as a teen, I found my mom's old Chop-o-matic. Think I used it to chop cabbage for cole slaw and maybe a few other vegetables. It had its uses but it was old and falling apart and you could only chop a small part of what you needed at a time. Learning to handle a chef's knife was more useful.

We can blame the Chop-o-matic for Gallagher's Sledge-o-matic routine.

I loved the Santo Gold infomercial it was so cheap and disjointed and bizarre, someone should make a movie about the story of the whack job behind the movie and the scheme. Wish I had taped it but it only aired on a channel I couldn't program into the VCR because of our cable set up, some of the channels on the actual TV set, the rest on the push-button box that had to be tuned to channel 4 to access those channels. Supposedly the Blood Circus was lost, I'd love to see it, it looked like perfect drive-in or b-movie fare. When watching the infomercial I used to try to identify as many wrestlers who appeared in the film as I could.

There was a Billy Mays infomercial I could watch, one for one of those adjustable segmented ladders that could be mounted on stairs, or used as an elevated platform, etc. But that was mostly because I thought the zaftig woman on the show with him was attractive in a MILF sort of way. Mute the sound and Billy was not a problem.

Spelling and missing words needed fixin'
« Last Edit: February 14, 2007, 05:52:42 AM by Yaddo 42 » Logged

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trekgeezer
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« Reply #11 on: February 12, 2007, 07:49:03 PM »

Hey every time Billy Mays comes on I shout out "Hey it's Billy Mays". I really love the one about Space Bags where he shakes the plastic spiders.


Menard I thought you'd  be more attuned to Richard Simmons and Sweatin' to the Oldies.
« Last Edit: February 13, 2007, 08:08:40 AM by trekgeezer » Logged




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« Reply #12 on: February 13, 2007, 01:54:35 AM »

Menard just liked watching the Solid Gold dancers, in between reruns of "Star Blazers."   While eating microwaved Twinkies and drinking Pepsi.
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Menard
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« Reply #13 on: February 13, 2007, 10:07:15 AM »

While eating microwaved Twinkies and drinking Pepsi.


Ding Dongs, not Twinkies.

I'll put my Ding Dong in a microwave and it gets all messy and gooey and....

What's that snickering?

HOSTESS DING DONGS!!!

Gutterminds.
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Katie
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« Reply #14 on: February 15, 2007, 06:14:09 PM »

I think the commercial was for Civil War history books.  It was out in the 80's and all I can remember is a bunch of rednecks getting ready to fight.  One of them says, "Wanta rassle for it?"  My younger brother and I use to crack up.
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