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March 16, 2018, 11:40:47 PM
594307 Posts in 45780 Topics by 6085 Members
Latest Member: CMEHide Forum  |  Movies  |  Bad Movies  |  Submerged (2005) (Repackaged with extra-hilarity) « previous next »
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Author Topic: Submerged (2005) (Repackaged with extra-hilarity)  (Read 561 times)
Frightening Fanatic of Horrible Cinema

Karma: 122
Posts: 2880

« on: March 04, 2007, 02:01:29 PM »

I'm starting to worry about my current mental state, because I've seen this la te Steven Seagal flick with some friends and we've had some fun. Not great fun, but fun after all.

First of all, let me warn all you: if you're not a fan of Seagal or you don't get any kicks out of laughing at his lameness, avoid this one.

This said, I found the whole thing quite hysterical. It's your typical Seagal direct-to-DVD stuff, with all the known faults, like incoherent plot (more on that later), Tony Scott-esque editing that tries to disguise Seagal's belly and the various sources of stock footage.

But c'on, the plot is so hysterical (it involves a mad doctor, an illegal mental control experiment and Seagal and his team -including Vinnie Jones!- doing their best "Dirty Dozen" impersonations), the gaps in logic so numerous (the team led by Seagal is inserted in the exact place where a previous team was ambushed) and the crappy directorial choices so ridiculously far-fetched (opera music playing while a brainwahed victim does a silent scream, so many shots of Seagal's face surrounded by darkness that it looks like Anthony Hickox is spoofing "Apocalypse Now") that it becomes quite a funny movie when watched in the right company.

Steven Seagal uses modern CGI to improve his acting skills (pics courtesy of CineCutre)

Now, if you want to see Seagal in something good, try here:
Small | Large
« Last Edit: March 04, 2007, 03:26:28 PM by Neville » Logged

Due to the horrifying nature of this film, no one will be admitted to the theatre.
Frightening Fanatic of Horrible Cinema

Karma: 633
Posts: 9388

« Reply #1 on: March 05, 2007, 11:02:17 AM »

Steven Seagal :The Animatronic hero!

"Aggressivlly eccentric, and proud of it!"
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