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April 24, 2018, 08:08:50 PM
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Latest Member: shawnyadav Forum  |  Movies  |  Bad Movies  |  Five Worst Movies You've Ever Had The Misfortune Of Watching « previous next »
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Author Topic: Five Worst Movies You've Ever Had The Misfortune Of Watching  (Read 12182 times)
Joe the Destroyer
« Reply #30 on: March 23, 2007, 04:00:50 AM »

Me, I'd have to say.

5. The Killing Birds- I actually hunted this movie after seeing the trailer, expecting your typical splatter flick, but instead got one of the worst zombie movies I'v ever seen.  The set up takes way, waaaay to long (hell, there's even a lame and pointless montage at one point in the set up with one fo the characters playing a harmonica, wtf!), and then when you get to the "action" all you see is one zombie running around killing people.  They try to make it seem like there are a bunch, but you can tell it's just the same person except in different shots because the make up is all the same for every zombie.  God, what an awful movie...

4. The Abomination- I think the creators were trying too hard to make this campy, because they actually succeeded only at making it crappy.  The monster looks like it's made of paper mache.  Let's not also forget the horrid acting, awful editing, craptacular cinematography, and scenes that seem like they were shot with a camcorder.  It gets an A for sucking. 

3. Zaat!- My biggest problem with this movie was sheer boredom!  Sure, the acting was bad and the plot a little too familiar, not to mention that there were many things that didn't make sense (spray bottle under water...).  The film all in all nearly put me to sleep. I had to force myself to finish it.

2. The Prey- Proof that some movies are better off as short films.  It essentially feels like the creators took a short, basic slasher flick set in the woods with a burnt gypsy as the antagonist and padded out the rest of the time with ass loads of nature footage from National Geographic and a few scenes of a ranger being a dumbass (i.e. telling jokes to animals, singing, etc.). 

1. Superbeast- Regardless as to what some have said of this film, I just can't stomach it.  It has to be one of the most boring films I've ever watched.  Only here can you watch someone investigate the forest in real time for about five f**king minutes!  Many of the scenes did not in any way feel useful to any kind of plot.  It just seemed to have that whole do-as-you-please feel to it.
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« Reply #31 on: March 23, 2007, 05:31:55 AM »

I really enjoyed Dune, Rocky IV and Popeye, I think Popeye's ace and Dune was the the film my mom took me to see before telling me she and my dad where getting divorced, so while it's not brilliant it was certainly the best thing that happened that day  Smile
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« Reply #32 on: March 23, 2007, 11:02:52 AM »

Not a definitave list but here's some that come to mind:

zombie lake, just boring, not even a lake full of naked chicks could redeem this one.

the Doors I was just praying for Jim Morrison to die so the movie would end.

Godzilla Final Wars as a Kaiju fan I found this a huge disapointment

Cool as Ice not saying I didn't laugh at it but boy was it bad.

A.P.E. this one has some really funny scenes but some of it is kinda boring, and all of it is really bad. I got to see it in the theatre in 3-D.

Frightening Fanatic of Horrible Cinema

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« Reply #33 on: March 23, 2007, 11:17:24 AM »

A.P.E. this one has some really funny scenes but some of it is kinda boring, and all of it is really bad. I got to see it in the theatre in 3-D.

Is this the one where the giant M*O*N*K*E*Y fights the giant rubber shark?

Oh, God...

If you're an Andy Milligan fan there's no hope for you.
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« Reply #34 on: March 23, 2007, 03:43:16 PM »

Yeah but that shark didn't have much "fight" in it Lookingup
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« Reply #35 on: March 23, 2007, 11:05:59 PM »

has anyone ever seen "Sssssss"? I wonder if there is some bodily function in which one can REMOVE a memory from one's BRAINZ.


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« Reply #36 on: March 23, 2007, 11:24:34 PM »

I love Rocky IV!  And I used to watch Popeye quite a bit when I was a kid, so I'm not sure how it'll hold up these days.

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« Reply #37 on: March 24, 2007, 02:18:54 AM »

No better way for removing BRAINZ than playing some Satanic Rock 'n' Roll in a graveyard to wake up zombies. Either that or mention the name of He Who Must Not Be Named.

Goblins still exist. Your Grandpa Seth is telling you!

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« Reply #38 on: March 24, 2007, 07:14:40 AM »

has anyone ever seen "Sssssss"? I wonder if there is some bodily function in which one can REMOVE a memory from one's BRAINZ.

       I thought SSSSS... was HILAROUSLY bad!!!! Inna good "bad" way,not a bad,bad way! (?)

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« Reply #39 on: March 24, 2007, 02:40:47 PM »

5 worst movies coming to my mind would possibly be
5. The Wiz - African American remake of the wizard of Oz staring Michael Jackson and Diana Ross?
4. Glitter - Bad Acting Bad Plot Bad pretty much everything.
3. Gigli - an out of luck hitman and a lesbian hitwomen are hired to kidnap a mentally challenged kid cause Al Pacino in his typical Role is going on trial for something....
2. Landspeed - Billy Zane tests the limits of speed by trying to hit Mach 3 in a car. And his competition, they don't call him Stealth Steven for nothing.
1. The Brown Bunny - Hailed as the worst movie ever made, it got booed at the Cannes film festival, my friend made me watch it and I didn't know what i was getting myself into.  Albeit it was the DVD version, the original apparently had 30-40 minutes more of Content to the film.  No movie even comes close to how bad this one is, name any movie and this one is worse. 2 hours of driving on a highway and the climatic scene where he get's a blowjob from his ex girlfriend but she's not actually there which leads you to think, did he really get a blowjob?

honerable mentions go out to Ring of Darkness, Date Movie, and Kevin Costner.
A Very Bad Person, overweight bald guy with a missing tooth, and
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« Reply #40 on: March 25, 2007, 12:11:25 AM »

 Bluesad Ive been racking my brain for days, trying to remember what my old five used to be, but I can't stop thinking about how they were all replaced by that boxed set from the Polonia Brothers. Buggedout

I mean, sure, I've seen stuff with lower production values, duller storylines, inepter acting, poorer editting, and un-specialler effects, but blaspheming the name of my favorite Roger Corman movie in order to draw attention to this crap has earned this five movie (actually, four & a short) boxed set a truly unique level of ire with me.  Hatred

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« Reply #41 on: March 26, 2007, 07:00:38 AM »

I like SssssssssS , idk why i just do. they should re-make that, i bet it could be good if handled properly.
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Must have caffeine...

« Reply #42 on: March 26, 2007, 07:16:46 AM »

I've seen my fair share of bad movies, but there are very few for which I can find absolutely no redeeming qualities whatsoever. Here's five of them, though.

1. Werewolf - Some archaeologists discover a werewolf skeleton which still has the power to bring the surce of lycanthropy down upon some unlucky schmoe of a writer. Features the most inept, unconvincing attack scene against the villain at the end.

2. King Dinosaur - Four astronauts are sent to a newly-discovered planet called Nova where they encounter giant lizards they claim to be dinosaurs. They then nuke them, and claim this is bringing "civilization" to Nova.

3. Agent For H.A.R.M. - Those evil Commies (at least I think they were supposed to be Soviets) are developing a new biological weapon made from space germs, so your average James Bond wannabe has to stop them. For an action movie, there's not a lot of action. The elderly scientist was more of a hero than the "secret agent."

4. Laserblast - Kid victimized by practically an entire town finds a discarded alien raygun that makes him drunk with power, and turns him into a green homicidal maniac with offscreen teleportation powers (witness him getting in front of the fleeing police officer despite the physical impossibility of it!).

5. Space Mutiny - Confusing, idiotic movie set aboard some random roaming spaceship where some guys are planning to stage a mutiny for some reason. The "hero" is a big muscleheaded moron who kills a helpless, disabled foe by immolating him.

Is it any surprise these are all Mystery Science Theater movies...?
« Last Edit: March 26, 2007, 07:21:24 AM by Kooshmeister » Logged
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« Reply #43 on: March 26, 2007, 09:47:51 PM »

In no particular order:

The Matrix - so much wasted potential
Exterminator 2 - Please stop ... please!
The Jar - *cries, hides in corner*
Hedwig and the Angry Inch - What the f**k is this s**t?

Honorable Mention:

Even Cowgirls Get the Blues

Kneel before Dr. Hell, the ruler of this world!
Bad Movie Lover

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What are you afraid of? It's only rock n' roll.

« Reply #44 on: March 27, 2007, 07:38:10 AM »

ah i see someone else has had been through the torture that calls itslef "the jar". f**k that movie , seriously.
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