Recent viewings

[lester1/2jr]

Here Comes the Devil - Fun, Tarantino ish Mexican horror movie. It opens with lesbian sex, quickly moves to murder then some other thing happens I can't remember. It was over the top in other words, the beginning. It eventually slows down enough to tell a fairly unremarkable story where two kids get lost on a hill for the night and aren't the same when they come back. Guess why (see title). The strongest element is the Tarantino ish "edgy" stuff and cute nude Spanish girls including the hot Mom.

The story doesn't actually do all that much though. Neither do the special effects ( wow a kid floating above their bed!) and the whole arc of it isn't particularly thrilling. It's no "the Orphanage" in terms of story and emotion,  but it remains entertaining, particularly if you don't watch a lot of horror movies and you're standard for originality an so forth are a little lower. If you aren't a nitpicking little bastard in other words

I'll give it a 3.75/ 5

more depth and ideas next time

[FatFreddysCat]

"Under Siege 2: Dark Territory" (1995) Steven Seagal returns as Navy SEAL badass Casey Ryback, whose cross country train trip with his niece is interrupted by terrorists. The usual mayhem follows. Eric Bogosian (who's usually above this sort of thing) is an interesting choice for a bad guy and it was funny to see a teenaged Katherine Heigl as Seagal's niece but the rest is pretty predictable and by the numbers.

[Mofo Rising]

Out of the Furnace (2013)

Not very well received I guess, but I found it very well done and enjoyed it immensely.

5 of 5

Howling II: Your Sister Is a Werewolf (1985)

Holy cats, this was a bad movie. But bad in the most entertaining way possible.

The original Howling was a witty movie with great special effects. The first sequel is almost an exact inversion of that. It's not a good sign when the only actor I recognize, other than Christopher Lee, is the convict who picked up Pee-Wee in Pee-Wee's Big Adventure.

The plot picks up right after the first movie. It involves the brother of Dee Wallace's character, former Captain America Reb Brown, and another colleague of hers traveling to the "Dark Country" of Transylvania with Christopher Lee. There they must battle a cult of werewolves led by the "Werewolf b***h" Stirba. (Movie title's words, not mine.) Along the way we're treated to a lot of '80s new wave punk, silly cult rituals, a werewolf menage-a-trois, and a whole lot of gratuitous nudity.

As an actual movie, you'd be generous in rating this two stars. If you're in the mood to see a thoroughly entertaining train-wreck, or just want to see a shot of Sybil Danning's breasts exposed 17 times in the end credits of something, see this movie. (I didn't make that last bit up.)

4 of 5

[Rev. Powell]

Howling II: Your Sister Is a Werewolf (1985)

Holy cats, this was a bad movie. But bad in the most entertaining way possible.

The original Howling was a witty movie with great special effects. The first sequel is almost an exact inversion of that. It's not a good sign when the only actor I recognize, other than Christopher Lee, is the convict who picked up Pee-Wee in Pee-Wee's Big Adventure.

The plot picks up right after the first movie. It involves the brother of Dee Wallace's character, former Captain America Reb Brown, and another colleague of hers traveling to the "Dark Country" of Transylvania with Christopher Lee. There they must battle a cult of werewolves led by the "Werewolf b***h" Stirba. (Movie title's words, not mine.) Along the way we're treated to a lot of '80s new wave punk, silly cult rituals, a werewolf menage-a-trois, and a whole lot of gratuitous nudity.

As an actual movie, you'd be generous in rating this two stars. If you're in the mood to see a thoroughly entertaining train-wreck, or just want to see a shot of Sybil Danning's breasts exposed 17 times in the end credits of something, see this movie. (I didn't make that last bit up.)

4 of 5

Years later I can't remember anything about this movie except the end credits. Joe Bob Briggs gave the movie a special award for "most innovative use of Sybil Danning's breasts."

[Jack]

I used to watch Howling 2 quite a bit back in my stoner days.  It all makes perfect sense then 

Little Witches (1996) - an old sealed room is discovered under a church. Of course the Catholic schoolgirls decide to sneak in there, and they find a book of magic. It's all in good fun but wouldn't you know it, turns out the spell book really works and golly gee they've summoned a demon. This was enjoyable. The characters were all quite likable, even the "bad" girl was kind of a sympathetic rebel type. Oh and lots of noodidity as well. Plot wasn't much but it was still kind of fun. 3.5/5.

[Jack]

Cherry Bomb (2011) - a stripper gets raped by a group of her customers and teams up with her brother to take revenge on them.  Not much to like about this one, Cherry is ditzy and shallow, her brother has no personality at all, and the bad guys are just scumbags.  It's pretty dumb too, like the car won't start at a critical moment even though it starts instantly on at least ten other occasions, etc. etc.  2/5.

[lester1/2jr]

"Hey movies, cars always start now" - @thesulk popular twitter poster

[Rev. Powell]

THE VAMPIRES' NIGHT ORGY (1974): A group of servants are stranded in a mysterious village when their bus breaks down. Great title, but terribly misleading: a more accurate description for this snoozer would be THESE VAMPIRES MIGHT BORE YE. 1/5.

[Umaril Has Returned]

The El Rey network shows a LOT of Shaw Brothers classics, uncut and uncensored.  I recently got to see "The Flying Guillotine" uncut last night, as well as other recent viewings in the last week or so including "Eight Diagram Pole Fighter" and the uncut "Avenging Eagle" with Ti-Lung and Alexander Fu-Sheng.

[lester1/2jr]

^top movies

[JaseSF]

Mega Shark vs. Giant Octopus (2009): Braindead Asylum movie featuring two giant prehistoric monsters, a megalodon (or mega-shark) and a giant octopus being accidentally released from their prehistoric slumber after being frozen in ice for millions of years. Of course, they naturally both go on a rampage attacking pretty much everything in sight in the ocean, the octopus an oil rig and the shark a 747 and numerous war vessels.

Sure there's a certain level of fun to be found here especially during the scenes with the monsters and the throwback 1950s style plot (some nods do seem to be made here to the much superior It Came From Beneath the Sea (1955) and of course, the prehistoric frozen monster being released has popped up in numerous classic sci-fi monster on the loose films). Sadly, when the monsters aren't on screen, this one is kind of a drag, sort of boring really. Debbie Gibson tries her best (even if she's unbelievably cast as a scientist) and actually does look pretty good here even if her acting isn't particularly inspiring. Lorenzo Lamas chews the scenery terribly as an over the top naval commander. Vic Chao co-stars as Gibson's love interest along with Sean Lawlor in the Hugh Marlowe type role. The most annoying elements here were the ridiculously scientific research scenes which seem to drag on forever and feature a flashing to black and white constantly back to color effect. God, I hated that. Kind of mindless dumb fun if one wants to waste an afternoon sometime. Certainly not anything particularly good although you have to credit the Asylum for its marketing in naming this Mega Shark vs. Giant Octopus. *** out of ***** stars and that's being somewhat generous mostly because it reminded me of many superior classic old films in terms of some of its plot.

[FatFreddysCat]

"G.I. Joe: Retaliation" (2013) Cartoonish action sequel finds the remnants of the Joe team battling a revitalized C.O.B.R.A., who of course are plotting to take over the world (again).

The story was probably written on a cocktail napkin but lots o' stuff got blowed up real good, so I was entertained.

[claws]

Monsterwolf (2010)

Oil company drilling on new grounds unleash a mystical wolf-like creature...
One step above average SyFy fodder. Doesn't make it necessarily a better movie, but one can see that some effort went into this. It's less crappy and thanks to decent production values its somewhat easy on the eyes. Being generous: 3.25/5

[lester1/2jr]

Miss Bala (2011) took me 3 days to finish this. Its one of those foreign movies where no one smiles, everyone's dirty and horrible things always happen. I don't doubt it reflects what's going on in Mexico between the drug lords and the government accurately but ...it's also supposed to be a movie. It has some excitement but a lot of like: she's smuggling cash to someplace so they show the guy taping the cash to her stomach in real time. okay, I know how to tape cash to a skinny Mexican girls stomach now. The whole point seems to just be as depressing and Oscar baiting as possible.

The lead actress is pretty if you like skinny chicks



2.5/ 5

[claws]

Ghost Chase: Director's Cut (1987)

Amateur filmmaker somehow cheated out of his inheritance gets help from a ghost to reclaim what is his.
This "Director's Cut" is the original German Theatrical Version, and contains many dialogue scenes (almost 30 minutes) that were edited for pacing for the U.S. Cut.
"Ghost Chase" is a bit of an oddity - Director Roland Emmerich steals yet again from Steven Spielberg while adding some of his own, so the outcome feels sort of fresh but also familiar.
Either way, this might be Emmerich's most interesting work to date. It's not great but has a certain peppy attitude. 3/5