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FatFreddysCat
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« Reply #5625 on: December 02, 2012, 12:05:30 AM »

"Elektra" (2005)

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Jennifer Garner reprises her role as Marvel Comics' female assassin in this spin-off from "Daredevil." This time she has to protect a young girl with very special powers from some very bad people.

This could've been a decent action flick but it spends way too much time on unnecessary flashbacks to Elektra's past, gives her mystical super powers that come and go depending on the whims of the story, and depends on waaaaaaayyyyy too many cheesy CGI effects during fight scenes.

But hey, Garner looks good in Elektra's red catsuit and those enemy ninjas who instantly explode when killed were pretty cool.

Not as bad as I'd heard, but I've also seen way better.
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Jack
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« Reply #5626 on: December 02, 2012, 07:35:10 AM »

Deadgirl (2008) - two kids are partying in an abandoned insane asylum. They find a door that's rusted shut - it obviously hasn't been opened in years. They break in and find a girl chained up inside. And almost unbelievably, she's alive. In fact it seems she's impossible to kill. She doesn't talk or really move much, but somehow she's survived with no food or water for years. So they do what any normal kids would do, they keep it a secret and use her for their sex slave. That works okay for a while, but then some other people find out about it; complications ensue. This kept me intrigued throughout - who is this girl? Is she some mad scientist's experiment from back when the mental institution was operating? The plot was different and somewhat interesting as well. It's not the sort of thing I'd watch again though as at its heart it's just an examination of human depravity. 3.5/5.

The Messengers (2007) -  a family moves from Chicago to a farm in North Dakota. Of course it turns out to be haunted, but only their daughter can see the ghosts so nobody believes her. It's not the least bit scary because the ghosts are the exact same CGI thingies that we've seen in every other haunted house movie for about 20 years now. I'd be more scared if Lady Gaga jumped out of the cellar and said boo. Characters were mediocre, plot was mediocre; this is basically Hollywood proving that for $16 million they can make a slightly more polished version of the stuff SyFy cranks out on a weekly basis for $2 million. 2.5/5.
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Newt
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« Reply #5627 on: December 02, 2012, 08:18:13 AM »

The Messengers (2007) -  a family moves from Chicago to a farm in North Dakota. Of course it turns out to be haunted, but only their daughter can see the ghosts so nobody believes her. It's not the least bit scary because the ghosts are the exact same CGI thingies that we've seen in every other haunted house movie for about 20 years now. I'd be more scared if Lady Gaga jumped out of the cellar and said boo. Characters were mediocre, plot was mediocre; this is basically Hollywood proving that for $16 million they can make a slightly more polished version of the stuff SyFy cranks out on a weekly basis for $2 million. 2.5/5.

"...It's not the least bit scary because the ghosts are the exact same CGI thingies that we've seen in every other haunted house movie for about 20 years now"

Well, they are in North Dakota... BounceGiggle
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Jack
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« Reply #5628 on: December 02, 2012, 09:43:13 AM »

The Messengers (2007) -  a family moves from Chicago to a farm in North Dakota. Of course it turns out to be haunted, but only their daughter can see the ghosts so nobody believes her. It's not the least bit scary because the ghosts are the exact same CGI thingies that we've seen in every other haunted house movie for about 20 years now. I'd be more scared if Lady Gaga jumped out of the cellar and said boo. Characters were mediocre, plot was mediocre; this is basically Hollywood proving that for $16 million they can make a slightly more polished version of the stuff SyFy cranks out on a weekly basis for $2 million. 2.5/5.


"...It's not the least bit scary because the ghosts are the exact same CGI thingies that we've seen in every other haunted house movie for about 20 years now"

Well, they are in North Dakota... BounceGiggle


They should have gone with an evil possum - that would have been scary  TeddyR

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indianasmith
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« Reply #5629 on: December 02, 2012, 02:30:51 PM »

An evil possum?? Doesn't that describe ALL possums?
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« Reply #5630 on: December 03, 2012, 07:40:33 AM »

Terminal Force a.k.a. Galaxis (1995) - Brigitte Nielsen and Richard Moll are on opposite sides of a war on some faraway, futuristic planet. It all centers around some crystal that Moll wants to obtain, I have no idea what purpose it serves. So anyhow they didn't have nearly enough money to shoot this whole thing in a futuristic setting so presto! Nielsen and Moll are magically transported to present day earth. Nielsen meets up with some guy who helps her track down the crystal's location while constantly doing battle with the cops and Moll. This was pure cheese throughout and fairly entertaining. Nielsen is dressed up in some sexy leather outfit and Moll is the king of corniness with his portrayal of the intergalactic space villain. 3.5/5.
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lester1/2jr
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« Reply #5631 on: December 03, 2012, 08:39:46 AM »

Rev- tolerance = pleasure?
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Rev. Powell
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« Reply #5632 on: December 03, 2012, 11:34:47 AM »

Rev- tolerance = pleasure?

"House of Tolerance" was the original French title and the name they gave to the semi-legal brothels because the government "tolerated" them. The movie originally played here as "House of Tolerance" but they changed the name to "House of Pleasures" for the DVD release to sell more copies.

DJANGO KILL! (IF YOU LIVE, SHOOT!) (1967): A half-breed bandit is betrayed by his fellows and left for dead in a shallow grave; two Indians rescue him and make gold bullets for him to use, and he rides into a wicked town looking for revenge and the stolen gold. This offbeat Spaghetti Western has lots of strange touches, such as homosexual cowboys and drunk parrots, and is oddly compelling, playing out like a mixture of FISTFUL OF DOLLARS and DEAD MAN. It has nothing to do with the Django series, and it's very gory for a 1967 Western.  3.5/5.
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"The best parts are watching Sly go through the full range of emotions: deadpan, deadpan with raised eyebrow, deadpan with quivering lip. There's also a great sequence where Sly drives his VW Beetle down the interstate for about 20 minutes, staring dramatically through the windshield.."-Joe Bob on A MAN CALLED RAMBO
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« Reply #5633 on: December 03, 2012, 03:59:38 PM »

Killshot-(2008) This is one of those movies that's production history is more interesting than the actual movie. Originally completed in 2006 it was shelved for 2 years and managed to gross only 10,000$ (ouch!) in it's extremely limited release. At one point according to imdb this was going to be a project for De Nero and Tarantino to lead in with Tony Scott directing. That sounds ridiculous and awesome and it's too bad it never came about.

So the film itself is a rather banal story of hitman Mickey Rourke teaming up with young whippersnapper Jason Gordon Levitt (in his continuing quest to appear in every single movie of the past 10 years) in order to attempt to extort a Real Estate agent out of 20,000$. It turns out they are pretty horrible at extorting because they encounter the wrong guy and Levitt is thrown out a window onto a gazebo. Now being a witness to these criminals Thomas Jane and his wife Diane Lane must enter witness protection. Perfectibility ensues.

For some reason Rourke plays a Native who refers to himself as Blackbird, he occasionally uses a hackneyed accent but most of the time just wanders around in a semi comatose stupor. Levitt fairs much better in a truly unhinged physical performance, the scene where he pulls a moose's head off a wall is a true highlight. Supposedly this was originally 30 minutes longer but they cut it to eliminate Johny Knoxville who audiences despised. I would like to see the original cut because as it is it just seems too minor a story to really. Despite my criticisms I was never bored and actually reasonably entertained. I enjoyed the initial Toronto setting as well because so many movies get shot here but few use it as part of the plot.
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lester1/2jr
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« Reply #5634 on: December 03, 2012, 05:42:21 PM »

rev- I see
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FatFreddysCat
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« Reply #5635 on: December 04, 2012, 12:13:59 AM »

"Surrogates" (2009)
http://www.youtube.com/v/tj-sC92wows

In this twisty sci-fi actioner set in the near future, humanity stays safe at home and uses robotic duplicates called "Surrogates" to live their lives in the outside world. A series of murders implicating the corporation that invented the machines leads a cop (Bruce Willis) to the heart of a conspiracy that could kill billions around the world.

Neat concept, cool stunts, nice dystopian vibe, worth a look.
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Jack
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« Reply #5636 on: December 04, 2012, 07:53:45 AM »

Starcrash (1978) - there's some big intergalactic war and oh good lord, it's all cheesier than cheese. This makes Buck Rogers in the 25th Century seem like Event Horizon in comparison. Stella Starboobs (Caroline Munro) runs around in her space bikini - which changes from scenes to scene - while some absolute doofus named Akton makes sure that everyone in the 6-12 year old demographic is suitably entertained. Then there's some goofy robot dude, an evil guy with and evil laugh and a huge spaceship shaped like a hand, and David Hasselhoff too. It's completely nutty, awful in every single way, and pretty darned entertaining  TeddyR  4/5.
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Rev. Powell
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« Reply #5637 on: December 04, 2012, 11:38:29 AM »

THE DAY HE ARRIVES (2011): A director arrives in Seoul to meet an old friend; he gets drunk, meets various people, and then situations start to repeat with variations, people who've met before act like they've never been introduced, and he meets a bar owner who looks and acts exactly like his ex-girlfriend. Well made but it's never clear what the movie is trying to say; or, more importantly, why we should care. 2.5/5.
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"The best parts are watching Sly go through the full range of emotions: deadpan, deadpan with raised eyebrow, deadpan with quivering lip. There's also a great sequence where Sly drives his VW Beetle down the interstate for about 20 minutes, staring dramatically through the windshield.."-Joe Bob on A MAN CALLED RAMBO
FatFreddysCat
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« Reply #5638 on: December 05, 2012, 12:47:26 AM »

"Wrong Turn" (2003)

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Standard but enjoyable entry in the "killer hillbilly" genre, with a gang of stranded travelers (including Eliza Dushku of "Buffy" fame, looking luscious as usual) being pursued through the West Virginia backwoods by a clan of homicidal inbred mutant cannibals. There's nothin' here that you haven't already seen in a dozen other similar movies but "Wrong Turn" is fast paced, extremely violent, gratuitously gory, and lotsa fun.
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Jack
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« Reply #5639 on: December 05, 2012, 07:39:05 AM »

The Devil's Rock (2011) - a pair of Allied commandos go to the Channel Islands on the day before D-day. Their mission is to blow up a big coastal defense cannon, and try to draw attention away from the fact that the real invasion is taking place at Normandy. Once there however, they hear screams coming from a nearby bunker and assume someone is being tortured. So they investigate, and find that the Germans have summoned a shape-shifting witch to help with the war effort. The highlight of the movie is definitely the German officer, played by Matthew Sunderland. He's completely amoral and brutal, but at the same time he wants to do the right thing and destroy the witch. Which isn't easy of course. He really sells the whole idea that you're actually in WWII, and I found the character fascinating. The witch herself (Gina Varela) is very well acted as well; she appears as the dead wife of the commando so as to gain his sympathy. She's very sweet and vulnerable, yet at the same time she's a bloodthirsty demon who would obviously tear these guys apart if she got the chance. And the overall brutality of the movie meant that you could never know what would happen next - maybe they'll cooperate to rid the world of this threat, or maybe one person will just decide to blow the other one's brains out. You just don't know. Not the type of thing I'd watch again for enjoyment as it's bleak and brutal, but it made for an interesting evening. 3.75/5.
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