Recent viewings

[indianasmith]

last night I watched a pretty decent little horror film called EXETER.

A church group has bought out an old orphanage/asylum and is cleaning out the place to refurbish it.
A teen volunteer brings all his pals up that evening for a rave, but his little brother gets possessed by a malevolent spirit after everyone leaves and then doors slam shut, stuff gets crazy, and people start to die.

This was a very creepy little story of possession with a nice twist ending. Some good gore effects, too. 4.5/5

[lester1/2jr]

Dressed to Kill (1980) - Nancy Allen was Brian De Palma's wife. She is super hot in this pretty good thriller that has a bit of tension but is generally speaking not as good or as 80's as Body Double.

A killer transexual is on the loose. Michael Caine is his psychiatrist or was and now thinks the man/ woman may be targeting his patients. Angie Dickinson who I think was on Scooby Doo once or twice is the other big star name but Nancy Allen is the selling point. Dennis Franz is okay as a sleazy detective a little lighter than his similar roles on TV.

The biggest problem is there aren't enough possible suspects. The twist is so obvious even I could see it coming. The overall mood and the acting and so forth were good but once you see what's happening... it's like the movie ends about 3/4 of the way through. Modern audiences who pay 30 thousand dollars to see a movie in a megaplex would expect a little more effort there. After decades of Law and Order viewers are a lot more cognitive of police procedure stuff as well.

It was pretty good relative to it's time though. 3.75 /5

[Jack]

Space Battleship Yamato (2010) - in the future Earth is under attack by aliens, and the surface is irradiated with the remnants of humanity living underground. But we receive a signal from some other aliens, promising to give us an anti-radiation device which would allow us to move back to the surface, but first we have to travel to their planet to get it. So the Space Battleship Yamato is sent out and there are plenty of space battles with alien fleets etc. This was pretty fun, lots of action and a bit of plot. The characters weren't developed or anything but they were good enough to hang an action movie around. I didn't see the last few minutes because the YouTube video I was watching ended early, but oh well, I assume it didn't ruin the movie or anything. 4/5.

[Rev. Powell]

FUTUERAMA: INTO THE WILD GREEN YONDER (2009): The Planet Express crew visits Mars Vegas, where Leo Wong plans to destroy planetoids to build the universe's largest miniature golf course, Leela joins an ecofeminist activist group, and Fry develops telepathic powers that just may make him the only one who can save the fate of he universe ("I get that a lot."). Other than the unfortunate growing Fry/Leela romantic dynamic, this final made-for-DVD feature actually feels like a series of the original TV episodes strung together, which is how it should be. 3/5.

[FatFreddysCat]

"The Last Shark" (aka "Great White," 1981)

http://youtu.be/z0l9f29zdBQ
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A seaside resort town is menaced by a giant man-eating shark, so two square jawed tough guys (Vic Morrow and James Franciscus) head out to sea in a creaky boat to kill it.

...sound familiar?

When this Italian "Jaws" knock-off was released in the U.S. as "Great White" in early '82, Universal Studios quickly sued it out of existence, accusing it of being a carbon copy of their shark movie. Well, duh. They probably didn't need to go to all that trouble cuz this is a typical Z-grade Italian movie with bad dubbing, an awkward script and unconvincing FX that would've been quickly forgotten if it weren't for the controversy.

[lester1/2jr]

Weekend at Bernies (1989) - I recently saw the sequel to this but had never actually seen the original. I knew what it was of course and had seen bits and pieces of it, but it has a kind of negative reputation. It's seen as very 80's and in a bad way. One day I said to myself, I should see that I bet it's good. There are so many movies that critics hate that are hilarious and there's tons of people who have never seen Pootie tang or not Another Teen Movie but think theyre bad because they judge the book by it's cover and so forth. I'm going to kidnap all of them and put them in a closet.

Two low level employees discover a discrepancy in their co's accounting. Their boss, the titular Bernie, is impressed and invites them to his Hamptons beach house for the weekend. I don't think it's a spoiler to say what happens: bernie dies. The hook of the movie is they bring his body around to places and people are so superficial and self absorbed they don't even notice he's dead. Everyone is content to say "great party" or something and move on. One of the guys has a (okay looking)  love interest but it's mostly slapstack shenanigans with the two guys trying to conceal the boss being dead.

Well, it was pretty good. It's kind of short on 80's cheese though. I wanted more neon colors and maybe the Scorpions to play at the party or something. Instead there's an awful lot of the two guys frantically trying to steer their dead boss around and whatnot, like a cheap coked up Laurel and Hardy. I'm glad I saw it though the name Weekend at Bernies is a touchstone in my mind. I actually liked the sequel better it was more campy and colorful.

3.75/5

[indianasmith]

I watched a neat little creature feature called DARK WAS THE NIGHT a couple of nights ago.
A remote Canadian town is terrorized by a bizarre creature that leaves three-toed hoof marks by night - then it begins killing people.
Lots of suspense; the creature is kinda cheesy but they don't show much of him till the very end, so the poor effects don't damage the story too much.  4/5

[FatFreddysCat]

A fist full of movies thus far on this holiday weekend:

"Olympus Has Fallen" (2013)

http://youtu.be/vwx1f0kyNwI
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A "Die Hard" variant starring Gerard Butler as a disgraced Secret Service agent who (of course) becomes the President's only hope when North Korean terrorists take over the White House. Empty headed shoot'em up, blow'em up fun, entertaining in a generic sort of way. Not to be confused with the very similar "White House Down" which was released around the same time.

"Trancers" (1985)

http://youtu.be/eg7OPwASvE8
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Charles Band's enjoyably silly cult classic mashes up "Blade Runner" and "The Terminator" on a six-pack budget, with Tim Thomerson as square jawed 23rd century cop Jack Deth, who gets sent back through time to 1985 L.A. to stop a bad guy from altering the future. Future Oscar and Emmy winner Helen Hunt (who looks like she was barely old enough to drink when she made this!) plays the sidekick/love interest/ damsel-in-distress role.

"We Bought A Zoo" (2011)

http://youtu.be/Krh1koDU2uE
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Cameron ("Almost Famous") Crowe directed this good natured dramedy about a recent widower (Matt Damon) who finds the path to heal his troubled family when they take over a run-down animal park in need of saving. Yes, it's sappy as hell but in all the right ways.

[Rev. Powell]

TROMA'S WAR (1988): After a plane crash on a Caribbean island, stranded citizens of Tromaville organize to defeat an army of terrorists. The budget for this film was the largest bad-taste comedy studio Troma had ever worked with---thousands or rounds of blanks, dozens of explosions, and stunt men thrashing around in flame-retardant suits---and the result is a film that sometimes falls into the trap of believing it's a real action movie, forgetting that it's supposed to be an absurd spoof. I think Troma fans may still find enough to give it a 3/5, but I'd go lower.

[JaseSF]

Deadliest Sea (2009): Young and naive Tommy (Sebastian Pigott) decides to travel to Kodiak, Alaska hoping to make big money as a greenhorn on a fishing vessel. He meets up with struggling Captain Jack Colvin (Peter Outerbridge) who may well lose his vessel the St. Christopher to the bank if he doesn't soon bring in a load of scallops. Unfortunately the St. Christopher needs many repairs before passing safety inspection but Colvin is so desperate he decides to chance fishing anyways hoping a load of scallops will get him out of financial trouble. He sneaks out in the middle of the night and right into a deadly raging storm. Now the unlikely crew must consider abandoning ship when the vessel begins to take on water...

While the description of this film makes it sound exciting, it really wasn't all that great a movie. This screams made for TV movie and it was apparently made for the Canadian Discovery channel. The acting in it is surprisingly wooden and unconvincing and the characters do not feel fleshed out. The special FX don't seem fully convincing either. At the beginning they claim this was based on a true story but at the end it says the film is a work of fiction, not sure you can have it both ways. One is better off just watching The Deadliest Catch to get a taste of what fishing in Alaska is like and there have been better and more convincing disaster at sea films as well. Disappointing. **1/2 out of ***** stars.

The Final Storm (2010): In the wake of a devastating storm following which numerous people seem to have mysteriously  vanished, an enigmatic stranger named Silas (Luke Perry) seeks shelter at a farm. Tom Grady (Steve Bacic), his wife Gillian (Lauren Holly), and their young son Graham (Cole Heppell) live there and decide to help Silas out and in return, he seems to return the favor however Silas's brash manner rubs Tom the wrong way. In addition, Silas has a dark secret regarding his past.

This film feels at times like a rip-off of Where Did All the People Go? meets The Rapture but it's inferior to that in pretty much every way. It was directed by Uwe Boll. Perry's character seems to represent evil and temptation. The performances from leads Perry, Bacic, and Holly are pretty good for what they were given to work with. Nothing is really explained here very well and this is mostly dull with the main focus and interest being on Perry's character as he tries to lead this family astray or insert himself in the father's place in different ways. Again, a disappointing end of the world thriller that doesn't prove all that thrilling. **1/2 out of ***** stars.

One Hour Photo (2002): Working at Savmart in a photo lab, lonely and socially awkward employee Sy Parrish (Robin Williams) carries on an unhealthy obsession with a young family, the Yorkins, who bring in their photos to get developed. This obsession takes an even more dangerous bent when Sy discovers a disturbing truth about father and husband Will Yorkin (Michael Vartan) which throws off Sy's interpretation of him as a "perfect" Dad.

The main reason to watch this is Williams' performance which was fantastic IMO. It's also a little haunting in some ways as the sadness of this character seems a little too disturbingly real at times. And this is a disturbing film and one not easy to watch at times, it forces us to look at things sometimes we don't want to picture, things of which we wouldn't want to take a picture. This film does in some ways feel like a throwback to the film noir element of one mistake leading a greater series of mistakes as a character tragically goes down a spiraling dark path of impending doom. In some ways it's also a chilling portrayal of a disturbed mind. And yet you can't help but feel some sympathy and compassion for him... ***1/2 out of ***** stars.

The Lego Movie (2014): A very ordinary, seemingly generic construction Lego worker named Emmet, may in fact be the prophesied "Special", the one who might be able to stop tyrannical ruler Lord Business from releasing the Kragle which will place everything in Lego world in stasis (or perhaps end the world) and end all efforts of master builders to change, innovate and improve anything.

This was a fun and enjoyable movie, like a child's play fantasy brought to vivid on-screen life. It has great moments and it was fun to see so many popular culture characters pop up throughout this thing, so much in fact at times this feels nerdgasmist. Imaginative, quirky, unpredictable, adventure-filled, this is lively and amusing and provides some good feel good messages like one might find on a cat poster. Highly enjoyable but also a bit crazy and all over the place at times. Still I'd give it ***3/4 out of ***** stars. That "Everything is Awesome" song was surprisingly catchy too although no doubt would get annoying on repeated listening.

[Jack]

Dawn of the Mummy (1981) - some fortune hunters in Egypt discover a mummy's tomb, but their work is interrupted when a group of fashion models take the place over for a photo shoot. Of course the mummy comes to life along with an army of the undead, and the mummy platoon eventually attacks a nearby village. The screaming in this thing was so damned annoying - a woman comes across a decapitated head lying in the desert and starts screaming and freaking out to the point where she's just flopping around on the ground; she's completely lost control of her body I guess. Another woman comes across the mummy and not only screams when she sees him, but screams for the entire 5 minutes he's walking after her. A guy encounters the mummy in its tomb, and yells his head off - even after he's gotten in his jeep and is driving away, it's "AAAAHHHH" the whole damned way. Characters were completely undeveloped and utterly interchangeable, with the possible exception of the head treasure hunter who grins like a lunatic. Maybe it was the two glasses of wine I had before dinner but I had one hell of a time staying awake through this whole thing. 2/5.

Nightmare Weekend (1986) - a doctor has developed some drug which is supposed to curb people's aggressive tendencies, or something like that. A group of sluts are brought to his mansion for human trials, and they all have sex with guys they've only met minutes before. There's also a teleportation device (which I would think would be a bigger scientific breakthrough than yet another drug), an animated doll that controls the computer system, an evil assistant doctor, and several other subplots. If nothing else the bizarrely amateurish editing certainly kept things moving along at a good clip, and all the nonsense being thrown on the screen kept it entertaining. I really can't comment on the last half hour as it was so dark I couldn't see a damned thing. I'm guessing there was some plot twist at the end but I only saw them cut from one black screen to another and said "WTF?" Anyhow, 3.5/5.

[Trevor]

Dawn of the Mummy (1981) Another woman comes across the mummy and not only screams when she sees him, but screams for the entire 5 minutes he's walking after her. A guy encounters the mummy in its tomb, and yells his head off - even after he's gotten in his jeep and is driving away, it's "AAAAHHHH" the whole damned way.

 

ROFLMAO! Now I have to see that! 

[FatFreddysCat]

"Sixpack Annie" (1975)

http://youtu.be/X92-sLnM9mo
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Vintage "hicksploitation" comedy about Annie, a well-endowed hillbilly gal whose Aunt is about to lose her small town diner to foreclosure. Annie and her pal Mary Lou head off to Miami on a mission to raise the money by finding a rich "sugar daddy."
Basically this is a slightly raunchier version of the "Lil' Abner" or "Beverly Hillbillies" formula (i.e. fish out of water country folk in the big city), with lots of silly slapstick humor and female eye candy. It was probably considered "dirty" for 1975 but it'll barely raise an eyebrow now.

[Trevor]

"Sixpack Annie" (1975)
It was probably considered "dirty" for 1975 but it'll barely raise an eyebrow now.

 

[Jack]

Dawn of the Mummy (1981) Another woman comes across the mummy and not only screams when she sees him, but screams for the entire 5 minutes he's walking after her. A guy encounters the mummy in its tomb, and yells his head off - even after he's gotten in his jeep and is driving away, it's "AAAAHHHH" the whole damned way.

 

ROFLMAO! Now I have to see that! 

For your enjoyment Trevor:

http://youtu.be/dAirq1nYXB4
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Okay maybe it was actually two minutes and not five, but it sure seemed like five