Bad Movie Logo
"A website to the detriment of good film"
Custom Search
HOMEB-MOVIE REVIEWSREADER REVIEWSFORUMINTERVIEWSUPDATESABOUT
Welcome, Guest. Please login or register.
Did you miss your activation email?
March 28, 2024, 06:27:42 AM
713325 Posts in 53055 Topics by 7725 Members
Latest Member: wibwao
Badmovies.org Forum  |  Movies  |  Bad Movies  |  You're in charge of Hollywood, what're the next five blockbuster remakes? « previous next »
Pages: [1] 2 3 ... 7
Author Topic: You're in charge of Hollywood, what're the next five blockbuster remakes?  (Read 42552 times)
Kester Pelagius
B-Movie Site Webmaster
Bad Movie Lover
****

Karma: 96
Posts: 908


Not a Time Lord!


WWW
« on: May 02, 2008, 12:42:52 PM »

There is no stopping the leviathan cycle of assembly line Hollywood remakes either on the big or small screen.  So, if you could control what Hollywood produced, what five movies/series would you like to see get the remake treatment?  What spin (if any) would you put on the story/plot?  CGI or old school SFX?

I know what I'd do.  I like SF so my five would lean toward that genre.  You can see outlines of my five movies/series here.  If the link to the old Mise-en-scene Crypt blog doesn't work try the new one, here.  (You'll have a chuckle at my top two.)
Logged

Cosmic Cinema - SF articles and reviews.

Mise-en-scene Crypt - Rants, reviews, & more! (10% NSFW)
CheezeFlixz
Frightening Fanatic of Horrible Cinema
****

Karma: 496
Posts: 3747


Pathetic Earthlings


WWW
« Reply #1 on: May 02, 2008, 01:17:55 PM »

You first link is dead ...

As for movies ...

I'm note a big fan of remaking classics, with that said ...

1. Patton (Schaffner 1970) and this time use the correct equipment from the correct country and time period.
2. Birth of a Nation (D.W. Griffith 1915) Just a great film, would love to see the epic remade.
3. Metropolis (F. Lang 1927) This would be cool with modern effects, piece the missing parts.
4. Napoléon (Grance 1927) I do not think these version has ever been remade.
5. Ben Hur (Wyler 1959) Give this one the Gladiator treatment.
Logged

Allhallowsday
B-Movie Kraken
*****

Karma: 2280
Posts: 20725


Either he's dead or my watch has stopped!


« Reply #2 on: May 02, 2008, 02:56:52 PM »

I'm note a big fan of remaking classics, with that said ...
2. Birth of a Nation (D.W. Griffith 1915) Just a great film, would love to see the epic remade.
I like the BEN HUR idea.  I will say that BIRTH OF A NATION is an important film, but great - ly boring.   (Hey, I don't have unrealistic expectations for 1915.)  It does, however, contain many of the ugliest racist images and BS history to ever "grace" the silver screen. 

Kester, on the old SCIFILM board, I had started a thread about good remakes (JOHN CARPENTER'S THE THING, INVADERS FROM MARS)  Tough to think of 5, but as I'm prone to do, and right outta my a**:
FORBIDDEN PLANET
SPARTACUS
SHADOW OF A DOUBT
(yes, a TV remake was done)
Universal's FRANKENSTEIN
THE OLD DARK HOUSE
Logged

If you want to view paradise . . . simply look around and view it!
CheezeFlixz
Frightening Fanatic of Horrible Cinema
****

Karma: 496
Posts: 3747


Pathetic Earthlings


WWW
« Reply #3 on: May 02, 2008, 03:33:46 PM »

I'm note a big fan of remaking classics, with that said ...
2. Birth of a Nation (D.W. Griffith 1915) Just a great film, would love to see the epic remade.
I like the BEN HUR idea.  I will say that BIRTH OF A NATION is an important film, but great - ly boring.   (Hey, I don't have unrealistic expectations for 1915.)  It does, however, contain many of the ugliest racist images and BS history to ever "grace" the silver screen.   

That's why it needs to be remade, it was rather boring, it was 3 hours long after all. I'd like to see it in one of them new fancy soundies.
Logged

AnubisVonMojo
B-Movie Site Webmaster
Frightening Fanatic of Horrible Cinema
****

Karma: 241
Posts: 1778


Jesus H. Chelios!


WWW
« Reply #4 on: May 02, 2008, 08:13:48 PM »

I agree that sci-fi flicks are the top contenders because they're the most dependent on special effects and could use a new polish. As such, my five would probably read like this:

-The Brain From Planet Arous (as directed by David Cronenberg and with a new name)
-Fiend Without a Face
-Terrornauts (keep the base concept but fix everything else)
-The Giant Claw
-Warning From Space (a powerful movie if you get rid of the people in giant starfish costumes...)
Logged


"Don't make me stain my last clean shirt with the back of your head." - Shatter Dead
"A grizzly bear with a chainsaw. Now THERE's a killing machine!" - The Simpsons
"I've always wanted to make love to an angry welder." - Jaws: the Revenge
HappyGilmore
B-Movie Kraken
*****

Karma: 772
Posts: 12286


I know Quack-Fu.


« Reply #5 on: May 02, 2008, 09:46:15 PM »

Santa Claus Conquers the Martians- It's got a mix of Sci-Fi and comedy, plus it's relatively obscure enough that it's not gonna live up to people's expectations of the original.  Add Steve Carell in as Dropo and it's a hit.

Frankenstein- Always liked it, myself.  Every other classic Universal monster seems to be remade, yet this isn't touched.

Fright Night I'd go old school Special effects on this, not computer stuff.

Nosferatu- I'd give it a whirl, possibly.

Logged

"The path to Heaven runs through miles of clouded Hell."

Don’t get too close, it’s dark inside.
It’s where my demons hide, it’s where my demons hide.
LilCerberus
A Very Bad Person, overweight bald guy with a missing tooth, and
Frightening Fanatic of Horrible Cinema
****

Karma: 703
Posts: 9080


Quis custodiet ipsos custodes?


« Reply #6 on: May 03, 2008, 01:13:21 AM »

Deep Throat
First, I think I'd give it a plot, some sort of story, perhaps with a little more emphasis on overcoming one's disabilities.

Next, I'd make an honest effort to find actresses who can actually act, and ones that aren't uglier than than my dog's derrière.

Finally, I'd turn the whole thing into a musical, like they did with Little Shop of Horrors, or The Producers.

Yeah, I'd probably have to tone it down a bit, but there are times that I just can't help thinking that Harry Reams was way too good for this material.

And whose crazy idea was it to associate Nixon with this movie? I mean, patriotism is brought up once or twice, but I don't see how that's a reference to politics, at least not partisanship.
Logged

"Science Fiction & Nostalgia have become the same thing!" - T Bone Burnett
The world runs off money, even for those with a warped sense of what the world is.
AnubisVonMojo
B-Movie Site Webmaster
Frightening Fanatic of Horrible Cinema
****

Karma: 241
Posts: 1778


Jesus H. Chelios!


WWW
« Reply #7 on: May 03, 2008, 06:31:51 AM »

Frankenstein- Always liked it, myself.  Every other classic Universal monster seems to be remade, yet this isn't touched.

Gil, what about Mary Shelley's Frankenstein with Bobby De Niro as the monster and Kenneth Branagh as the delirious doctor (and director)? Shifting into SAT analogy mode, Mary Shelley's Frankenstein was to embryonic fluid as Dead Alive was to gore: excessive and extremely icky.

Nosferatu- I'd give it a whirl, possibly.

Another one that was remade, back in '79 courtesy of Werner Herzog and starring Klaus "freaky deaky" Kinski as Count Graf "happy feet" Orlok... err, I mean, Count Dracula. I always liked the original myself because there was something enjoyable creepy about being unable to hear any of the characters speak and the way the shadows worked with the grainy, aged film.
Logged


"Don't make me stain my last clean shirt with the back of your head." - Shatter Dead
"A grizzly bear with a chainsaw. Now THERE's a killing machine!" - The Simpsons
"I've always wanted to make love to an angry welder." - Jaws: the Revenge
RCMerchant
Bela
B-Movie Kraken
*****

Karma: 0
Posts: 30423


"Charlie,we're in HELL!"-"yeah,ain't it groovy?!"


WWW
« Reply #8 on: May 03, 2008, 06:58:29 AM »

DEEP THROAT?  BounceGiggle I give you karma, sir!


I would like to see remade...
Reginold LeBorg 's the BLACK SLEEP aka DR.CADMAN'S SECRET(1955)-the All star horror film  with Basil Rathbone as Dr.Cadman,and Tor Johnson,Lon Jr.,Bela,John Carridine,and a few other ood ball goons.
As for the cast...

For those not famliar with the film...here's the trailer-
 
Small | Large


Dr.Cadman (Basil Rathbone role) -Who else but Herbert West himself,Jeffery Coombs?
His assistant,Dr.Rumsey-Bruce Campbell!!!
Mungo (Lon Chaney Jr. Role)-Sid Haig
Bohemund (the John Carradine role) David Carradine!
Casmir (the Bela Lugosi role)-Robert DeNiro. Why...I dunno. It amuses me. This is my movie fantasy,right?
Curry (the Tor Johnson role)-Arnold Shwatzneggar! I would LOVE to see him with his head shaved,his eyes rolled back in his head,and acting like a raving idiot!
The Melty faced mutant guy(George Sawaya role)-Micheal Berryman! He NEEDS to be in more films! I just love him!
The patchy hair girl (Sally Yarnell role) Britney Spears.It amuses me.

Make it super-bloody and outrageous,in the RE-ANIMATOR sense. Get Sam Raimi back on track away from super hero s**t and into EVIL DEAD mode!
« Last Edit: May 03, 2008, 07:07:17 AM by RCMerchant » Logged

"Supernatural?...perhaps. Baloney?...Perhaps not!" Bela Lugosi-the BLACK CAT (1934)
Interviewer-"Does Dracula ever end for you?
Lugosi-"No. Dracula-never ends."

Slobber, Drool, Drip!
https://www.tumblr.com/ronmerchant
The Burgomaster
Aggravating People Worldwide Since 1964
Frightening Fanatic of Horrible Cinema
****

Karma: 773
Posts: 9036



« Reply #9 on: May 03, 2008, 07:22:54 AM »

How about Fantastic Voyage?
 
Logged

"Do not walk behind me, for I may not lead. Do not walk ahead of me, for I may not follow. Do not walk beside me either. Just pretty much leave me the hell alone."
Allhallowsday
B-Movie Kraken
*****

Karma: 2280
Posts: 20725


Either he's dead or my watch has stopped!


« Reply #10 on: May 03, 2008, 10:59:16 AM »

Frankenstein- Always liked it, myself.  Every other classic Universal monster seems to be remade, yet this isn't touched.
Gil, what about Mary Shelley's Frankenstein with Bobby De Niro as the monster and Kenneth Branagh as the delirious doctor (and director)? Shifting into SAT analogy mode, Mary Shelley's Frankenstein was to embryonic fluid as Dead Alive was to gore: excessive and extremely icky.
Well, I think Happy and I meant recreating JAMES WHALE's 1931 version, y'know, same story, same makeup... (as I'm sure you know it's far from MARY SHELLEY.)
Logged

If you want to view paradise . . . simply look around and view it!
HappyGilmore
B-Movie Kraken
*****

Karma: 772
Posts: 12286


I know Quack-Fu.


« Reply #11 on: May 03, 2008, 11:54:22 AM »

Frankenstein- Always liked it, myself.  Every other classic Universal monster seems to be remade, yet this isn't touched.

Gil, what about Mary Shelley's Frankenstein with Bobby De Niro as the monster and Kenneth Branagh as the delirious doctor (and director)? Shifting into SAT analogy mode, Mary Shelley's Frankenstein was to embryonic fluid as Dead Alive was to gore: excessive and extremely icky.

Nosferatu- I'd give it a whirl, possibly.

Another one that was remade, back in '79 courtesy of Werner Herzog and starring Klaus "freaky deaky" Kinski as Count Graf "happy feet" Orlok... err, I mean, Count Dracula. I always liked the original myself because there was something enjoyable creepy about being unable to hear any of the characters speak and the way the shadows worked with the grainy, aged film.
I'm aware of the DeNiro one.  Doesn't necessarily mean I like it.

As far as Nosferatu, didn't know it was remade, actually. 
Logged

"The path to Heaven runs through miles of clouded Hell."

Don’t get too close, it’s dark inside.
It’s where my demons hide, it’s where my demons hide.
AnubisVonMojo
B-Movie Site Webmaster
Frightening Fanatic of Horrible Cinema
****

Karma: 241
Posts: 1778


Jesus H. Chelios!


WWW
« Reply #12 on: May 03, 2008, 12:36:32 PM »

Frankenstein- Always liked it, myself.  Every other classic Universal monster seems to be remade, yet this isn't touched.
Gil, what about Mary Shelley's Frankenstein with Bobby De Niro as the monster and Kenneth Branagh as the delirious doctor (and director)? Shifting into SAT analogy mode, Mary Shelley's Frankenstein was to embryonic fluid as Dead Alive was to gore: excessive and extremely icky.
Well, I think Happy and I meant recreating JAMES WHALE's 1931 version, y'know, same story, same makeup... (as I'm sure you know it's far from MARY SHELLEY.)

Oh, sorry guys, took it too literally. When Happy said that the other Universal Monsters had been remade, I immediately thought about the source material rather than the movies themselves. Speaking of which though, has there been a Creature From the Black Lagoon remake? I kinda want to say that I'd like to see that remade too, except that the costume for the monster is just so eternally cool that I figure I'd be disappointed with whatever else they could come up with.  TongueOut

And Happy, check out the Nosferatu remake if you get a chance. It doesn't get the best feedback from critics, but it's got this certain surreal German bizarreness to it and Kinski's performance feels especially dirty and diseased.
Logged


"Don't make me stain my last clean shirt with the back of your head." - Shatter Dead
"A grizzly bear with a chainsaw. Now THERE's a killing machine!" - The Simpsons
"I've always wanted to make love to an angry welder." - Jaws: the Revenge
Bonehead-XL
Dedicated Viewer
**

Karma: 11
Posts: 90



« Reply #13 on: May 03, 2008, 07:07:53 PM »

First off, one of my dream projects as a amateur screenwriter/director is a epic remake of The Mole People. I first envisioned such a thing a few years back as this very complex metaphor for class relations and racism. It would also probably be ridiculously violent and feature mole man sex.

Another one I've always wanted to do was another verison of The Phantom of the Opera. Yeah, yeah, I know we've seen countless verison of this story over the years but maybe three out of the thirty-some adaptation (That would be the Chany verison, "Phantom of the Paradise," and "Midnight Song") are really worth anything. I'd go back to the original novel, first off, and also drawl some material from the various different verison over the years. (A lot of them had good ideas but didn't gel over all.) My main goal would be to undo all the damage the Andrew Lloyd Weber musical has done to the character and remind people that this is a horror story first off, then a tradegy, and maybe a romance fourth or fifth down that list.

As much as I adore all the Sleepaway Camp movies, all the eighties slasher being remade has made me think about a remake. (Hey, better a fan do it then some inept Hollywood producer.) The verison I've envisioned would really get into the psychology of the character of Angela and be an original story that takes elements from all three previous films.

Ichi the Killer is a movie I had a lot of problems with: the overdone plot, the emphisis on violence towards women, and a wildly uneven tone. But the stuff that was good in that movie was awesome. An American remake that ironed the plot down to just the important stuff, uped the violence even further into a wild, comic book style, cut out all the unnesscery raping and beating, and had an honest to God ending could be the "Pulp Fiction" for a new generation. A new title would probably be needed too.

As for my final choice, I'd go with Xtro. The original was so bizarre and went off in so many different angles but the root idea has a lot of power to it. (That being, a young child realizes his father isn't what he's always admired him to be) There's two directions you could go in, straighten the story up some and turn it into a more personable, David Cronenberg-type body horror flick, or go even further with the weirdness, and create a dream-like, obscure metaphor for the feelings at the center of the story.   

I'd also like to see remakes of The Brain That Wouldn't Die, Billy Jack, and The Car.
Logged
LilCerberus
A Very Bad Person, overweight bald guy with a missing tooth, and
Frightening Fanatic of Horrible Cinema
****

Karma: 703
Posts: 9080


Quis custodiet ipsos custodes?


« Reply #14 on: May 03, 2008, 11:04:46 PM »

I think maybe I'd start by catering to the Direct to Video crowd, with all the cardboard sets, bad CGI, cheesy midi muzak, and good looking women who can't act.

My first five remakes would be five different versions of The Most Dangerous Game.

The first version would be a pretentiously faithful adaptation of Richard Connell's original short story, sticking way too close to the source material, with lots of long drawn out scenes of Rainsford & Zaroff wondering around in a poorly textured CGI jungle.

The second version would be a modernized, more socially relevant retelling of the story. I'd make it a sort of road movie, about a flaky jerk who's trying to get his two boneheaded kids from a lower class suburb in New Jersey to their grandma's in Boston.

The third version would be set in the future, in outer space. This time, I'd make the protagonist a woman.. who looks good in a bikini... who's just escaped from prison... with a friend, who also looks good in a bikini, and they crash on a planet, where they encounter Zaroff and another castaway, who also looks good in a bikini... and Zaroff would be chasing them around in their bikinis, and they find a stash of really, really huge guns... and The Cramps would write a song about it!

The fourth version would be set in the desert, in a post apocalyptic future, in which Zaroff would be some sort of warlord, and Rainsford would have a really cool car.

Finally, the fifth version would be a slob humored, gross out comedy musical in which Zaroff would be a cannibal, and it would have lots of homophobic humor, as well as numerous references to previous versions of the same movie.
Logged

"Science Fiction & Nostalgia have become the same thing!" - T Bone Burnett
The world runs off money, even for those with a warped sense of what the world is.
Pages: [1] 2 3 ... 7
Badmovies.org Forum  |  Movies  |  Bad Movies  |  You're in charge of Hollywood, what're the next five blockbuster remakes? « previous next »
    Jump to:  


    RSS Feed Subscribe Subscribe by RSS
    Email Subscribe Subscribe by Email


    Popular Articles
    How To Find A Bad Movie

    The Champions of Justice

    Plan 9 from Outer Space

    Manos, The Hands of Fate

    Podcast: Todd the Convenience Store Clerk

    Faster, Pussycat! Kill! Kill!

    Dragonball: The Magic Begins

    Cool As Ice

    The Educational Archives: Driver's Ed

    Godzilla vs. Monster Zero

    Do you have a zombie plan?

    FROM THE BADMOVIES.ORG ARCHIVES
    ImageThe Giant Claw - Slime drop

    Earth is visited by a GIANT ANTIMATTER SPACE BUZZARD! Gawk at the amazingly bad bird puppet, or chuckle over the silly dialog. This is one of the greatest b-movies ever made.

    Lesson Learned:
    • Osmosis: os·mo·sis (oz-mo'sis, os-) n., 1. When a bird eats something.

    Subscribe to Badmovies.org and get updates by email:

    HOME B-Movie Reviews Reader Reviews Forum Interviews TV Shows Advertising Information Sideshows Links Contact

    Badmovies.org is owned and operated by Andrew Borntreger. All original content is © 1998 - 2014 by its respective author(s). Image, video, and audio files are used in accordance with the Fair Use Law, and are property of the film copyright holders. You may freely link to any page (.html or .php) on this website, but reproduction in any other form must be authorized by the copyright holder.