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Badmovies.org Forum  |  Movies  |  Bad Movies  |  THINGS I'VE LEARNED FROM BAD MOVIES. « previous next »
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Author Topic: THINGS I'VE LEARNED FROM BAD MOVIES.  (Read 137488 times)
AllisonSNLKid
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Your Saturday Night Live Guru since 1996!


« Reply #15 on: July 18, 2008, 08:09:39 PM »

Dr. Jekyll and Ms. Hyde

There are worse things to be.  For instance, you could turn into Sean Young.

Don't mess with Mother Nature - you'll grow boobs!

A man who can proudly declare he's a genius while wearing a pink neglige is confident in his manliness.

Perhaps Jim Carrey wasn't the great first choice.

Thank God Tim Daly had "Wings" to fall back on.

Thank God Sean Young fell off the radar after this movie. 

When a relative warns you about toiling in your late relative's failed experiments, you best listen.  But, the movie would only be fifteen minutes long.  How much fun is that?

Conversely, to avoid such a shortened film, CONDUCT THE EXPERIMENT!

No animals were harmed in the making of this film...because a dumb human tested the product instead.

I'm currently working on a review for this movie, so I'll likely use all of these for it.
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It's like people only do things because they get paid.  And that's just really sad.
Dr. Whom
Frightening Fanatic of Horrible Cinema
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Posts: 1565


Cthulhu for president! Why choose the lesser evil?


« Reply #16 on: August 11, 2008, 09:20:30 AM »

From The Glamorous Life of Sachiko Hanai

- Having a call-girl as your tutor improves your school grades no end

- Noam Chomsky is strangely arousing for Japanese professors
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"Once you get past a certain threshold, everyone's problems are the same: fortifying your island and hiding the heat signature from your fusion reactor."

Wenn ist das Nunstück git und Slotermeyer? Ja! ... Beiherhund das Oder die Flipperwaldt gersput.
InformationGeek
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« Reply #17 on: August 11, 2008, 12:16:25 PM »

What I learned from Eight Legged Freaks:
- Apparently, people can enter locked buildings, especially when we can clearly see the door being locked.
- Some windows make no sounds when breaking.
- Giant spiders love eating parrots, cats, ostriches, dogs, and the occasional mounted moose head.
- It's very rational to enter giant holes in the walls of your basement, especially after hearing something whimpering in it.
- Spiders bleed green goo.
- Giant spiders are strong enough to pull car doors off.
- Toxic waste seems to make your hair grow.
- Crossbows, chainsaws, sledgehammers, pitchforks, and things similar things can be found inside a mall.
- Spiders hate perfume.
- Guy in red baseball caps have better chances of survival then everyone else in a diner.
- Most importantly, I actually like movies about giant spiders attacking a small town.
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Website: http://informationgeekreviews.blogspot.com/

We live in quite an interesting age. You can tell someone's sexual orientation and level of education from just their interests.
Psycho Circus
B-Movie Kraken
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Posts: 12049


Shake The Faith


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« Reply #18 on: August 11, 2008, 01:54:40 PM »

Things I learned from Masters Of The Universe:

- The planet of Eternia is in fact, one room.
- You can't get shot when barechested, ever.
- Humanoid aliens can't grasp the concept of fried chicken.
- Finding weird instruments in open graves is perfectly normal.
- Lizards are afraid of skeletons.
- 80s synthersizers can open intergalatic portals.
- Harnessing the power of the universe will cover you in gold
- Dolf Lundgren can bring your parents back from the dead.
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AllisonSNLKid
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Your Saturday Night Live Guru since 1996!


« Reply #19 on: August 17, 2008, 10:28:34 PM »

Date With an Angel (not a bad movie, but something that could only have been made in the 1980s)

Fallen angels love Wendy's french fries.

Aspirin, when taken in large doses over a period of time, is perfectly safe.

Angels always get time on Earth for good behavior when they save someone's life...though I thought she was supposed to take him to Heaven.

The doctor said the brain tumor was very serious, and Jim was going to die...and all of a sudden, he'll be around for a long time?  What happened to the test audience ending? 

It's quite a romance...at least Jim will never be angry at The Angel for talking too much.

Dino DiLaurentiis' company made this...are you surprised it tanked?

I'm actually a sap for movies like this with mega happy-endings, but this movie was flat out an idea that only could have worked in the mid-1980s.

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It's like people only do things because they get paid.  And that's just really sad.
Jack
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Posts: 10327



« Reply #20 on: August 18, 2008, 07:51:46 AM »

Black Swarm:

It's perfectly normal to trust your child to the man (whom you just met) who created the killer wasps that are now zombie-fying the town.
If you hear a swarm of wasps buzzing from a hole in the wall, you should stick your face in there.
Blind people made blind jokes every 30 seconds or so.
You can build a huge, top secret research facility under a town without anyone noticing.
Any miscellaneous manhole cover will probably lead you to the top secret research facility - that no one knows about.
If swarms of wasps are attacking - get outdoors as soon as possible!
Once turned into a zombie, you can walk around town all day without anyone noticing.
Once you've dressed in your wasp-proof clothing, and are looking right in the wasp nest, make sure you remove the screen over your face so you can see better.
It's normal to hire someone who hasn't lived in the town for a decade to be the sheriff.
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The world is changed by your example, not by your opinion.

- Paulo Coelho
Dr. Whom
Frightening Fanatic of Horrible Cinema
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Karma: 113
Posts: 1565


Cthulhu for president! Why choose the lesser evil?


« Reply #21 on: August 16, 2009, 06:55:30 AM »

Things I've learned from Godzilla, Final Wars

Earth's last hope is a Joseph Stalin lookalike with a katana
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"Once you get past a certain threshold, everyone's problems are the same: fortifying your island and hiding the heat signature from your fusion reactor."

Wenn ist das Nunstück git und Slotermeyer? Ja! ... Beiherhund das Oder die Flipperwaldt gersput.
venomx
Guest
« Reply #22 on: August 16, 2009, 11:54:51 AM »

Things I've learned from Godzilla, Final Wars
Earth's last hope is a Joseph Stalin lookalike with a katana

That was Don Fry from UFC. BounceGiggle Twirling BounceGiggle
« Last Edit: August 16, 2009, 12:06:15 PM by Venomx » Logged
InformationGeek
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Karma: 441
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Let's all be Friends.


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« Reply #23 on: August 16, 2009, 12:10:45 PM »

What I learned from Eight Legged Freaks:
- Apparently, people can enter locked buildings, especially when we can clearly see the door being locked.
- Some windows make no sounds when breaking.
- Giant spiders love eating parrots, cats, ostriches, dogs, and the occasional mounted moose head.
- It's very rational to enter giant holes in the walls of your basement, especially after hearing something whimpering in it.
- Spiders bleed green goo.
- Giant spiders are strong enough to pull car doors off.
- Toxic waste seems to make your hair grow.
- Crossbows, chainsaws, sledgehammers, pitchforks, and things similar things can be found inside a mall.
- Spiders hate perfume.
- Guy in red baseball caps have better chances of survival then everyone else in a diner.
- Most importantly, I actually like movies about giant spiders attacking a small town.

What do you know?  My first ever post on the website!  I've come along way.
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Website: http://informationgeekreviews.blogspot.com/

We live in quite an interesting age. You can tell someone's sexual orientation and level of education from just their interests.
El Misfit
[Insert witty here]
B-Movie Kraken
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Karma: 1103
Posts: 12884


Hi there!


« Reply #24 on: August 16, 2009, 12:41:07 PM »

It Conquered the World:
-Aliens are always watching us
-Aliens abduct satellites!
-An alien's brain is its right eye Thumbup
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yeah no.
LilCerberus
A Very Bad Person, overweight bald guy with a missing tooth, and
Frightening Fanatic of Horrible Cinema
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Karma: 702
Posts: 9058


Quis custodiet ipsos custodes?


« Reply #25 on: September 03, 2009, 12:38:30 AM »

Presentation of your middle finger is seldom an effective defense against gunfire.
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"Science Fiction & Nostalgia have become the same thing!" - T Bone Burnett
The world runs off money, even for those with a warped sense of what the world is.
El Misfit
[Insert witty here]
B-Movie Kraken
*****

Karma: 1103
Posts: 12884


Hi there!


« Reply #26 on: September 03, 2009, 07:35:18 AM »

From "Manos," The Hand of Fate, I learned:

There are worse ways to spend 68 minutes than by hammering nails through my fingers. 
when a Fertilizer salesman directs a movie, it will be bad
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yeah no.
LilCerberus
A Very Bad Person, overweight bald guy with a missing tooth, and
Frightening Fanatic of Horrible Cinema
****

Karma: 702
Posts: 9058


Quis custodiet ipsos custodes?


« Reply #27 on: January 04, 2011, 09:12:12 PM »

From Lady Terminator, & The Barbarian Queen;

It DOES have teeth! Buggedout
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"Science Fiction & Nostalgia have become the same thing!" - T Bone Burnett
The world runs off money, even for those with a warped sense of what the world is.
ghouck
Frightening Fanatic of Horrible Cinema
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Karma: 585
Posts: 3749


Afro-Mullets RULE!


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« Reply #28 on: January 04, 2011, 09:53:17 PM »

"The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo"

Girls can be both sexy and ugly at the same time.

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Raw bacon is GREAT! It's like regular bacon, only faster, and it doesn't burn the roof of your mouth!

Happiness is green text in the "Stuff To Watch For" section.

James James: The man so nice, they named him twice.

"Aw man, this thong is chafing my balls" -Lloyd Kaufman in Poultrygeist.

"There's always time for lubricant" -Orlando Jones in Evolution
diamondwaspvenom
Frightening Fanatic of Horrible Cinema
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Karma: 228
Posts: 1415



« Reply #29 on: January 05, 2011, 01:44:30 PM »

Friday the 13th part V: A New Beginning:

If you're gonna kill anyone, don't hack the fat kid into pieces with an axe. You may push his distant relative a little too far over the edge.

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