I got an email the weekend before last from Leigh Scott, a former director of Asylum movies who has since escaped The Asylum along with a bunch of other ex-Asylum employees who finally got sick of the whole mockbuster nonsense and the guy in charge constantly meddling with their films. Scott and company have gone on to form a new production company. More creative freedom. Bigger budgets.
Anyway, he'd previously sent me some info about their first film, a Lovecraft adaptation starring Jeffry Combs. You can read about it here.
This time he sent me word that production had just begun on a new movie called WOLVESBAYNE that's sort of a werewolf HELLBOY co-starring Marc Dacascos as a Nazi vampire cult leader and Yancy Butler as his "Evil Lynn". You can read about it here.
But the one that stuck out to me was an extra little blurb he included in the email about a Sci-Fi Channel disaster movie they recently completed."We just wrapped an end of the world disaster film starring Gigi Edgely from Farscape and Stephanie Jacobson from Battlestar Razor and the upcoming ABC show LIFE ON MARS. The film is heavy duty sci-fi stuff (in concept, not the network) and involves cool stuff like time travel, quarks, strangelets etc. Justin Jones directed."
I asked him in a follow-up email what the title was and told me JUDGMENT DAY, but the network didn't care for it. I replied with:"Sci-Fi probably doesn't like it because it lacks a colon and a subtitle. Bet if you called it JUDGMENT DAY: QUANTUM APOCALYPSE or COSMIC CATACLYSM: JUDGMENT DAY they'd go for it in a heartbeat. I don't know what their obsession is with titles like that."
If you've paid any attention to the Sci-Fi Channel and their original movies you'd know it to be true.
CAVED IN: PREHISTORIC TERROR
DISASTER ZONE: VOLCANO IN NEW YORK
GARGOYLES: WINGS OF DARKNESS
HAMMERHEAD: SHARK FRENZY
MAGMA: VOLCANIC DISASTER
NYC: TORNADO TERROR
Those are just a few examples. Heck, a few years ago Sci-Fi had a giant squid movie called DEADLY WATER. That may have been the worst title ever. That's probably why Sci-Fi decided to hold an online contest to come up with a new title. The winning submission was KRAKEN: TENTACLES OF THE DEEP.
My theory about it is that the first part before the colon has to be some sort of statement of fact, something basic regarding the film's premise. The second half after the colon is the hyperbole part that should make people think "Oh, ****!"
Minutes after I sent that reply he wrote back:"Can I suggest Quantum Apocalypse if I give you credit somewhere? That is ridiculous enough to work."
An hour later I get this email:"Oh, man. I just ran QUANTUM APOCALYPSE by the big guys....they love it!!!!
Congrats. You are now part of sci-fi channel history!"
So there you go. After years of watching and reviewing Sci-Fi Channel original movies I've now gone and named one. I tossed QUANTUM APOCALYPSE out there as joke and now it's the new title of the movie. Too bad they'd already filmed it because I would have told Leigh Scott if he really wants to credit me somehow for the new title he should name a character "Foy" and kill them in the apocalypse. Guess I'll just have to settle for a "Special Thanks" in the closing credits you won't be able to read when it airs on Sci-Fi because of how they squish the end credits to run promos.
New Foyeurism is up with the third and I think best installment of my obsession with failed TV pilots from the depths of obscurity. Also have a great new Foycast up to. Links are in my sig.