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Badmovies.org Forum  |  Other Topics  |  Off Topic Discussion  |  The Perfect Murder « previous next »
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Author Topic: The Perfect Murder  (Read 3410 times)
BTM
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« on: October 01, 2008, 08:13:50 AM »

Weeks ago I inadvertently discovered the perfect way to kill someone in my apartment complex and make it look like an accident.  I was in my room when I noticed the fan next to my bed had some dust clinging to it's blades.  Grabbing a screwdriver, I unplugged my fan, sat down on the floor of my room, unscrewed the front side, sprayed a cloth and cleaned it out.  During the process, several pieces of dust and lint fell on floor (I have a tile floor, BTW), so I sprayed a bit of Pledge and wiped the bits back up.  Finally, I reassembled the fan, put my fan up and then went to the kitchen to clean out the rag.

A few minutes later I went back into my room and WHOA!!  I almost slipped on the portion of the floor that I had previously sprayed.  And get this, I know polished floors are slick when you wear socks, but I was BAREFOOT and I still almost slipped!! 

After this happened about three times, I grabbed a mop and wiped the area down a bit, trying to remove some of the polish. 

This gave me a crazy thought: if I wanted to bump someone off in the apartment complex I think all I'd have to do is polish the floor in front of their apartment and just wait until they come outside.  (Unless of course they're wearing shoes.)  Course, I could maybe knock on their door and then run off so they'll step outside.

Not that I would EVER do that mind you, but it's a weird thought that just popped in my head.
« Last Edit: October 01, 2008, 11:20:05 AM by BTM » Logged

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« Reply #1 on: October 01, 2008, 11:38:09 AM »

I have forwarded a copy of this post to the proper authorities.  Wink
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BTM
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« Reply #2 on: October 01, 2008, 03:35:58 PM »

I have forwarded a copy of this post to the proper authorities.  Wink

Well, that's okay, I don't believe you'd really do that.

Hey, would you like some almond cookies and tea?
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Patient7
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« Reply #3 on: October 01, 2008, 04:06:12 PM »

I have forwarded a copy of this post to the proper authorities.  Wink

Well, that's okay, I don't believe you'd really do that.

Hey, would you like some almond cookies and tea?

[Mr. Burns voice] Oh my, some careless individual left these thousands of dollars just lying on the table, Smithers, perhaps we should leave and when we return the money will be gone. [/Mr. Burns voice]
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« Reply #4 on: October 01, 2008, 04:14:53 PM »

I have a "people to kill" list  Smile
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Menard
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« Reply #5 on: October 01, 2008, 06:38:50 PM »

This gave me a crazy thought: if I wanted to bump someone off in the apartment complex I think all I'd have to do is polish the floor in front of their apartment and just wait until they come outside.  (Unless of course they're wearing shoes.)  Course, I could maybe knock on their door and then run off so they'll step outside.

Not that I would EVER do that mind you, but it's a weird thought that just popped in my head.

The chance that a fall like that would actually kill someone is pretty remote.

Injury and potential recurring neurological problems, perhaps even paralysis, is much more likely. Even if it did kill them, it would likely take a while for the hemorrhaging caused pressure on areas of the brain causing a cessation of various functions throughout the body.

Basically, if it did work, it would be a slow and cruel death.

You need to work up a plan that kills them as quickly as possible.



That being said...

...are you okay?

You started a thread about whether it's better to have found love and lost it or not have found it at all, and also stated that you were feeling depressed.

You started this thread about a perfect murder (not that I believe you mean it; after all, your plan is flawed).

We can all have weird thoughts when we are down, especially if there's nobody to talk to.

I was just wondering as your posts have been a little odd lately (not like there's really a norm on this forum Lookingup).
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« Reply #6 on: October 01, 2008, 07:23:50 PM »

I have a "people to kill" list  Smile

That's OK, You're probably ON a few also. .  TongueOut TongueOut TongueOut
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BTM
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« Reply #7 on: October 01, 2008, 07:30:02 PM »


The chance that a fall like that would actually kill someone is pretty remote.


Well, I forgot to mention there's a lot of old people where I live and middle aged people who occasionally get drunk and are REAL annoying.  


That being said...

...are you okay?

You started a thread about whether it's better to have found love and lost it or not have found it at all, and also stated that you were feeling depressed.

You started this thread about a perfect murder (not that I believe you mean it; after all, your plan is flawed).

We can all have weird thoughts when we are down, especially if there's nobody to talk to.

I was just wondering as your posts have been a little odd lately (not like there's really a norm on this forum Lookingup).

Whoa, is that selfless concern I hear?  Okay, who are you, and what did you do with Menard?

Ha!

No, seriously, I get thoughts sometimes.. and yeah, I do suffer from severe depression, it comes and goes, been dealing with it for.. well, actually since I was a kid, if you really want to know the truth.  Some days are okay, some days are really bad.  And yeah, I contemplate suicide sometimes, but I've been doing that on and off for years, so I doubt I'd actually go through with it, unless, of course, something really disastrous happened.

(God, we got all serious, didn't we?)

But the whole murder thing, I just thought, "Whoa, what is someone did this on purpose?  Like went around intentionally spraying pledge on this tile floor..."  I mean, I'm a writer, we think up a lot of weird "what ifs".  
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Patient7
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« Reply #8 on: October 01, 2008, 10:12:30 PM »

I have a "people to kill" list  Smile

Don't we all?
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« Reply #9 on: October 01, 2008, 10:54:57 PM »

The perfect murder ....

Just shoot them in the head in the hog lot. Hungry hogs don't leave a trace.
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