Bad Movie Logo
"A website to the detriment of good film"
Custom Search
HOMEB-MOVIE REVIEWSREADER REVIEWSFORUMINTERVIEWSUPDATESABOUT
Welcome, Guest. Please login or register.
Did you miss your activation email?
March 19, 2024, 06:36:15 AM
712927 Posts in 53040 Topics by 7722 Members
Latest Member: GenevaBarr
Badmovies.org Forum  |  Other Topics  |  Off Topic Discussion  |  Gross joke thread? « previous next »
Pages: 1 2 3 [4]
Author Topic: Gross joke thread?  (Read 18921 times)
AndyC
Global Moderator
B-Movie Kraken
****

Karma: 1402
Posts: 11156



« Reply #45 on: October 27, 2008, 08:23:08 PM »

What do you call a leper in a jacuzzi?

Porridge.
Logged

---------------------
"Join me in the abyss of savings."
Mr. DS
Master Of Cinematic Bowel Movements
B-Movie Kraken
*****

Karma: 1869
Posts: 15511


Get this thread cleaned up or YOU'RE FIRED!!!


WWW
« Reply #46 on: November 07, 2008, 09:25:35 PM »

What did a woman say to Michael Jackson at the beach.
Get out of my son (sun). 


What do you call a leper in a car accident?
A puzzle


Three old guys are in a nursing home talking about their body functions.  One says, "I'd love to have a good bowel movement every day."  Another one hears this and says, "I'd love to have a good pee every day".  The last old guy says, "I have a good pee and poop every day at 7:00 AM.  Only problem is, I don't wake up until 9:00 AM". 
Logged

DarkSider's Realm
http://darksidersrealm.blogspot.com/

"You think the honey badger cares?  It doesn't give a sh*t."  Randall
AndyC
Global Moderator
B-Movie Kraken
****

Karma: 1402
Posts: 11156



« Reply #47 on: November 07, 2008, 10:49:35 PM »

Three old ladies are sitting on a bench when a flasher walks up and exposes himself.

The first one had a stroke.

The second one also had a stroke.

The third one couldn't reach.
Logged

---------------------
"Join me in the abyss of savings."
Psycho Circus
B-Movie Kraken
*****

Karma: 1531
Posts: 12049


Shake The Faith


WWW
« Reply #48 on: November 08, 2008, 05:20:32 AM »

One day there was a little girl and it was her birthday, but her parents had to go out for the night so they hired a babysiter and told him to let the girl do whatever she wanted to do because it was her birthday.
So when the parents left, the little girl was playing and the babysiter got tired so he said "I'm going to take a shower and the little girl said "Oh, can I take a shower with you?" and the babysiter said " Uh, O.K. Just don't look down."

When they were taking a shower the little girl dropped the shampoo and when she picked it up she saw his dick and said "What's that?"

The guy said "Um, it's a ruber ducky" and the girl says "O.K."

Then the babysiter said "I'm tired I'm going to go to sleep." and the girl says "Can I go to sleep with you?" and the guy says "Um, O.K. Just don't look under the covers."

So when they're in the bed there's a thunderstorm and the girl gets scared and hides under the covers. Then she looks at the guys dick and says "Can I play with your rubber ducky because I'm scared" and the guy says " Uh, O.K." and he falls asleep.

The next morning he looks at the bed and he sees the there is blood all over the place and he asks the little girl "What Happened" and the little girl says"The rubber ducky spit at me so I chopped it's head off."
Logged

Mr. DS
Master Of Cinematic Bowel Movements
B-Movie Kraken
*****

Karma: 1869
Posts: 15511


Get this thread cleaned up or YOU'RE FIRED!!!


WWW
« Reply #49 on: October 21, 2009, 08:02:13 AM »

Figured I'd bring this back with this one I heard today;

Why are so many people into sex with barnyard animals?

They're looking for a stable relationship.
Logged

DarkSider's Realm
http://darksidersrealm.blogspot.com/

"You think the honey badger cares?  It doesn't give a sh*t."  Randall
Doggett
Bustin' makes me feel good !
Frightening Fanatic of Horrible Cinema
****

Karma: 979
Posts: 8413


I've seen things you people couldn't imagine...


WWW
« Reply #50 on: October 21, 2009, 08:05:41 AM »

You guys should all be ashamed of yourselves.

Especially you !
Logged

                                             

If God exists, why did he make me an atheist? Thats His first mistake.
Saucerman
Opinionated Blowhard Par Excellence
B-Movie Site Webmaster
Frightening Fanatic of Horrible Cinema
****

Karma: 192
Posts: 1245


Hypnotic, ain't it?


WWW
« Reply #51 on: October 21, 2009, 08:28:07 AM »

So, a leper decides to go to a baseball game but, sensitive to his condition, sits way back in the bleachers where he hopes his appearance won't disturb anyone. 

A guy sits down next to him, and the leper says, "Excuse me sir, but as you can see I am a leper, and if my condition disturbs you, I'll move."  The guy says, "No, no, don't worry about it, just watch the game."

In the third inning, the guy starts puking uncontrollably.  The leper says, "Sir, I can see my appearance is disturbing you, I'll move."  The guy says, "No, no, don't worry about it, just watch the game."

In the sixth inning, the guy starts puking uncontrollably.  The leper says, "Sir, I can see my appearance is disturbing you, I'll move."  The guy says, "No, no, don't worry about it, just watch the game."

In the ninth inning, the guy starts puking uncontrollably.  The leper says, "Sir, I can see my appearance is disturbing you, I'll move."  The guy says, "No, no, don't worry about it, just watch the game."

Now the leper is really curious, and asks the guy, "If it's not my leprosy that's making you puke, what is?"

The guy responds, "The guy sitting behind you keeps dipping his nachos into your back!"
Logged

AndyC
Global Moderator
B-Movie Kraken
****

Karma: 1402
Posts: 11156



« Reply #52 on: October 21, 2009, 10:15:18 AM »

A little boy walks in while his mom is in the shower. He points at her bush and asks "What's that?"

"Uh, that's my sponge, for washing," she says.

A couple of weeks later, the same thing happens, except that the kid's mom had recently shaved off her bush.

"Where's your sponge?"

"Uh, it got dirty and I threw it away."

Again, the kid is satisfied with the answer and a couple more weeks go by, until the kid comes running into the house.

"Mommy Mommy, I found your sponge!"

"What do you mean?" she asks.

"The neighbour lady's washing Daddy's face with it!"
Logged

---------------------
"Join me in the abyss of savings."
Raffine
Frightening Fanatic of Horrible Cinema
****

Karma: 812
Posts: 4466



« Reply #53 on: October 21, 2009, 01:18:53 PM »

Why does Helen Keller masturbate with only one hand?

So she can moan with the other.



Logged

If you're an Andy Milligan fan there's no hope for you.
AndyC
Global Moderator
B-Movie Kraken
****

Karma: 1402
Posts: 11156



« Reply #54 on: October 21, 2009, 05:03:21 PM »

What did Helen Keller do when she fell down the well?

She screamed her hands off.


How did Helen Keller's parents punish her?

They put extra knobs on all the doors.


How did they punish her when she was really bad?

They left the plunger in the toilet.
Logged

---------------------
"Join me in the abyss of savings."
Pages: 1 2 3 [4]
Badmovies.org Forum  |  Other Topics  |  Off Topic Discussion  |  Gross joke thread? « previous next »
    Jump to:  


    RSS Feed Subscribe Subscribe by RSS
    Email Subscribe Subscribe by Email


    Popular Articles
    How To Find A Bad Movie

    The Champions of Justice

    Plan 9 from Outer Space

    Manos, The Hands of Fate

    Podcast: Todd the Convenience Store Clerk

    Faster, Pussycat! Kill! Kill!

    Dragonball: The Magic Begins

    Cool As Ice

    The Educational Archives: Driver's Ed

    Godzilla vs. Monster Zero

    Do you have a zombie plan?

    FROM THE BADMOVIES.ORG ARCHIVES
    ImageThe Giant Claw - Slime drop

    Earth is visited by a GIANT ANTIMATTER SPACE BUZZARD! Gawk at the amazingly bad bird puppet, or chuckle over the silly dialog. This is one of the greatest b-movies ever made.

    Lesson Learned:
    • Osmosis: os·mo·sis (oz-mo'sis, os-) n., 1. When a bird eats something.

    Subscribe to Badmovies.org and get updates by email:

    HOME B-Movie Reviews Reader Reviews Forum Interviews TV Shows Advertising Information Sideshows Links Contact

    Badmovies.org is owned and operated by Andrew Borntreger. All original content is © 1998 - 2014 by its respective author(s). Image, video, and audio files are used in accordance with the Fair Use Law, and are property of the film copyright holders. You may freely link to any page (.html or .php) on this website, but reproduction in any other form must be authorized by the copyright holder.