Bad Movie Logo
"A website to the detriment of good film"
Custom Search
HOMEB-MOVIE REVIEWSREADER REVIEWSFORUMINTERVIEWSUPDATESABOUT
Welcome, Guest. Please login or register.
Did you miss your activation email?
July 29, 2015, 11:05:25 PM
552105 Posts in 42047 Topics by 5383 Members
Latest Member: belljingo
Badmovies.org Forum  |  Other Topics  |  Off Topic Discussion  |  For sale, 55 gallon drum of lube. « previous next »
Pages: [1]
Author Topic: For sale, 55 gallon drum of lube.  (Read 129 times)
sprite75
The Cat Herder of Badmovies
Frightening Fanatic of Horrible Cinema
****

Karma: 244
Posts: 3055


I'm a Mac...


« on: July 05, 2015, 11:34:04 PM »

Yep, this exists.

Quote
For some reason, there's a 55 gallon keg of lube for sale on Amazon. When something like that pops up, you can expect the Internet to react accordingly. And it did. Read on for the funniest reviews.





And in case you were wondering, yes Amazon still offers this for sale.

Logged

God of making the characteristic which becomes dirty sends the hurricane.
Trevor
Chief South African Troublemaker at Badmovies.org
B-Movie Kraken
*****

Karma: 1006
Posts: 12259



WWW
« Reply #1 on: July 06, 2015, 02:58:08 AM »

Yep, this exists.

Quote
For some reason, there's a 55 gallon keg of lube for sale on Amazon. When something like that pops up, you can expect the Internet to react accordingly. And it did. Read on for the funniest reviews.





And in case you were wondering, yes Amazon still offers this for sale.




 BounceGiggle BounceGiggle

Here's my favourite review:

Quote
Yes, yes and yes. Here's why I love this product:

A) I'm a big fan of buying in bulk, especially for items you know you're going to use. No sense in buying the 6-pack of toilet paper when you know you'll be wiping your bum for years to come. And likewise, there's no sense in buying the 8oz bottle of lube when you know you'll be ramming willies up there every night until the day you die.  Buggedout

2) Store this in your closet and save yourself the embarrassment of having another dry run--we all know how painful that is in the morning.

3) Go green. Less packaging material, less emissions in shipping several smaller containers. Even if you hate the planet, pretending to care is a major turn-on for a lot of people.

4) Be the life of the party. Post an ad on your favorite networking site, invite everyone over. Feel good knowing your essentials are taken care of. Create an event your guests will remember.


 BounceGiggle BounceGiggle


Logged

I used to say I live my life a quarter mile at a time and I think that's why we were brothers- because you did, too. No matter where you are, whether it's a quarter mile away or half way across the world. The most important thing in life will always be the people in this room. Salute mi familia. You'll always be with me... And you'll always be my brother.
sprite75
The Cat Herder of Badmovies
Frightening Fanatic of Horrible Cinema
****

Karma: 244
Posts: 3055


I'm a Mac...


« Reply #2 on: July 08, 2015, 12:50:33 PM »


 BounceGiggle BounceGiggle

Here's my favourite review:

Quote
Yes, yes and yes. Here's why I love this product:

A) I'm a big fan of buying in bulk, especially for items you know you're going to use. No sense in buying the 6-pack of toilet paper when you know you'll be wiping your bum for years to come. And likewise, there's no sense in buying the 8oz bottle of lube when you know you'll be ramming willies up there every night until the day you die.  Buggedout

2) Store this in your closet and save yourself the embarrassment of having another dry run--we all know how painful that is in the morning.

3) Go green. Less packaging material, less emissions in shipping several smaller containers. Even if you hate the planet, pretending to care is a major turn-on for a lot of people.

4) Be the life of the party. Post an ad on your favorite networking site, invite everyone over. Feel good knowing your essentials are taken care of. Create an event your guests will remember.


 BounceGiggle BounceGiggle






A friend pointed me to George Takei's review this morning;

Quote
Brad and I will be Grand Marshals at this year's San Diego Pride Parade, and we were looking for just the right touch to add a bit of pizazz to our appearance. So when we stumbled across the PASSION NATURAL WATER BASED LUBRICANT - 55 GALLON drum, we felt we'd struck gold: "Just enough volume to soak an entire parade of spectators, and yet fits easily in our float." Double win.

Now, how to spray the lube on the excited on-lookers? Why, by water pump gun, of course. To test out our delivery mechanism, we purchased a drum for our back yard and set up a slip and slide. I had Brad charge toward me down the slide, and I fired at will. It helped to imagine he was a Klingon Bird of Prey: Target that explosion and FIRE.

What I didn't expect was that Brad's forward momentum would cause him to crash into me, upending the entire drum along with us. Utter chaos. Our unfortunate cats, who had come out to judge our activities as cats will, were caught in the deluge. Looking like drowned rats, they howled and sped around the yard in hysterical circles, then tried for ten minutes to climb a tree.

Once again, the neighbors thought we'd set something on fire, so the LAFD arrived shortly afterwards. Try explaining any of this to a stranger, especially a hunky one in uniform. "Hose me down?" I offered. He kindly did, then retrieved our cats out of the tree with only minor scratches to the face. (They still aren't speaking to us, by the way.)


 BounceGiggle BounceGiggle BounceGiggle
Logged

God of making the characteristic which becomes dirty sends the hurricane.
Pages: [1]
Badmovies.org Forum  |  Other Topics  |  Off Topic Discussion  |  For sale, 55 gallon drum of lube. « previous next »
    Jump to:  


    RSS Feed Subscribe Subscribe by RSS
    Email Subscribe Subscribe by Email


    Popular Articles
    How To Find A Bad Movie

    The Champions of Justice

    Plan 9 from Outer Space

    Manos, The Hands of Fate

    Podcast: Todd the Convenience Store Clerk

    Faster, Pussycat! Kill! Kill!

    Dragonball: The Magic Begins

    Cool As Ice

    The Educational Archives: Driver's Ed

    Godzilla vs. Monster Zero

    Do you have a zombie plan?

    FROM THE BADMOVIES.ORG ARCHIVES
    ImageThe Giant Claw - Slime drop

    Earth is visited by a GIANT ANTIMATTER SPACE BUZZARD! Gawk at the amazingly bad bird puppet, or chuckle over the silly dialog. This is one of the greatest b-movies ever made.

    Lesson Learned:
    • Osmosis: os·mo·sis (oz-mo'sis, os-) n., 1. When a bird eats something.

    Subscribe to Badmovies.org and get updates by email:

    HOME B-Movie Reviews Reader Reviews Forum Interviews TV Shows Advertising Information Sideshows Links Contact

    Badmovies.org is owned and operated by Andrew Borntreger. All original content is © 1998 - 2014 by its respective author(s). Image, video, and audio files are used in accordance with the Fair Use Law, and are property of the film copyright holders. You may freely link to any page (.html or .php) on this website, but reproduction in any other form must be authorized by the copyright holder.