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March 28, 2015, 07:27:22 AM
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Badmovies.org Forum  |  Other Topics  |  Off Topic Discussion  |  My sister tried to kill herself again « previous next »
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Author Topic: My sister tried to kill herself again  (Read 194 times)
A.J. Bauer
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« on: March 23, 2015, 07:39:12 PM »

She took four Depakote and got scared. They're taking her to hospital. She wasn't unconscious or dying.
I asked her why she didn't tell people she was depressed, she said her friends had plans, I asked her why she didn't talk to me.
She said "I don't want to put that on you".

I don't even know what to feel. I guess I should feel bad because she's depressed but the fact she attempted this while I was in the house has me really p**sed at her.
I'm feeling really conflicted. I care about her, maybe that's why it p**ses me off that she'd do this.
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Rev. Powell
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« Reply #1 on: March 23, 2015, 07:56:35 PM »

So sorry to hear that. It is understandable you would have those feelings. Best wishes to you, your sister, and your family.
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« Reply #2 on: March 23, 2015, 10:59:02 PM »

Anger is a natural response in such a situation, however, don't let your anger override your compassion.
She needs you right now.
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dean
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« Reply #3 on: March 23, 2015, 11:30:43 PM »

Sorry to hear about this AJ. I hope you can help give her the support she needs.

I know this isn't an American site, but this is a pretty good resource that may help [obviously a good idea to see what support networks/avenues there are in your area.] Great for those who need help and maybe also for those close to them too.

http://www.beyondblue.org.au/the-facts/suicide-prevention/support-after-a-suicide-attempt
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Allhallowsday
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« Reply #4 on: March 24, 2015, 09:18:03 AM »

She took four Depakote and got scared. They're taking her to hospital. She wasn't unconscious or dying.
I asked her why she didn't tell people she was depressed, she said her friends had plans, I asked her why she didn't talk to me.
She said "I don't want to put that on you".

I don't even know what to feel. I guess I should feel bad because she's depressed but the fact she attempted this while I was in the house has me really p**sed at her.
I'm feeling really conflicted. I care about her, maybe that's why it p**ses me off that she'd do this.
This is the sister who was abused by the cousin?  The cousin your mother welcomed back into your home recently in which you and your mom live with your sister?  Maybe it's time to step back and look a little harder.  You're angry?  If I have those details correct, I cannot imagine how your sister must be feeling. 
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Newt
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« Reply #5 on: March 24, 2015, 09:43:45 AM »

I'm in the same place as AHD. 

Suicide attempts are a message.  Just be very glad you will be able to continue the conversation.
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A.J. Bauer
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« Reply #6 on: March 24, 2015, 10:45:40 AM »

She took four Depakote and got scared. They're taking her to hospital. She wasn't unconscious or dying.
I asked her why she didn't tell people she was depressed, she said her friends had plans, I asked her why she didn't talk to me.
She said "I don't want to put that on you".

I don't even know what to feel. I guess I should feel bad because she's depressed but the fact she attempted this while I was in the house has me really p**sed at her.
I'm feeling really conflicted. I care about her, maybe that's why it p**ses me off that she'd do this.
This is the sister who was abused by the cousin?  The cousin your mother welcomed back into your home recently in which you and your mom live with your sister?  Maybe it's time to step back and look a little harder.  You're angry?  If I have those details correct, I cannot imagine how your sister must be feeling. 

This has been going on since loooooooooooooooong before that scumf**k came to visit. Mom, Dad, and I think it might be a plot for attention. I wish I could say my sister wouldn't do that, but I know her too well.
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Allhallowsday
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« Reply #7 on: March 24, 2015, 02:19:42 PM »

She took four Depakote and got scared. They're taking her to hospital. She wasn't unconscious or dying.
I asked her why she didn't tell people she was depressed, she said her friends had plans, I asked her why she didn't talk to me.
She said "I don't want to put that on you".

I don't even know what to feel. I guess I should feel bad because she's depressed but the fact she attempted this while I was in the house has me really p**sed at her.
I'm feeling really conflicted. I care about her, maybe that's why it p**ses me off that she'd do this.
This is the sister who was abused by the cousin?  The cousin your mother welcomed back into your home recently in which you and your mom live with your sister?  Maybe it's time to step back and look a little harder.  You're angry?  If I have those details correct, I cannot imagine how your sister must be feeling. 

This has been going on since loooooooooooooooong before that scumf**k came to visit. Mom, Dad, and I think it might be a plot for attention. I wish I could say my sister wouldn't do that, but I know her too well.
Yeh?  Sounds evasive to me.  I think that perhaps you are not looking hard enough... "long before...{he} came to visit..."?  What about before and after the attack?  Being victimized does not make us heroes, or right, or good.  We are simply victimized.  And rapists don't take just innocence; they take time.  Sometimes they take even more.  I don't doubt your sister wants attention. 
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A.J. Bauer
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« Reply #8 on: March 24, 2015, 09:49:16 PM »

He raped her when she was eight. She's twenty-six this month maker her four years older than me.

We found out the hard way she had epilepsy when she had a seizure in the class room. She had seizures a few more times until we found the meds that worked (the depakote).

She went through her rebellious teenage phase and still hasn't left it. One day she'll be fun to hang out with and the next she's being inordinately cruel to everyone, especially Mom.

She used to take dance classes, she was thin, and pretty. Now she's morbidly obese and refuses to do anything about it. She refuses to exercise, we have to wait for her to catch up in public, and yet she still insists on eating excessive junk food. The best part of her life was when she had a boyfriend named Nick. I thought "Finally, she can be independant, move out, get better." but after spending a year with him she left him because "he was controlling what she ate", something she accuses Mom of when we don't buy her fatty foods.

So she came back to living in our house and throws a tantrum when you so much as ask her to clean her f**king room. She eats, naps, and watches Netflix all day everyday, she was fired from three jobs, and will constantly demand Mom give her rides to certain places and expects her to change her schedule. Our mother, the woman who cooks for her, drives her around, who let's her stay in this house, Angela will constantly get into fights with her if you ask her to pull her weight around.

I love my sister, I do. I love her so much. But her behavior is beyond awful, she is constantly picking fights and always has to have the last word. The day Chris came over I heard Angie and Mom have the nastiest fight yet, I screamed, and screamed at her to just SHUT UP for a minute but she kept arguing until I was shouting just to drown her out. It wasn't the mature thing to do but she pushed me to my breaking point. I lost my voice for four days after that.

I went to see her in the psych ward today (second time she's been there) and we had a decent conversation. It was good to see her but I'm still happy she's not in the house. Hearing Mom and Angie fight every morning is tiresome. On the worst days she'll complain that I'm "chewing my cereal too loud" or "drinking my coffee too loud". What the hell am I supposed to do with that information? I can't control it but she yells at me like I'm the a***ole. She is un-goddamn-believable.
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Allhallowsday
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« Reply #9 on: March 24, 2015, 09:57:04 PM »

I can relate to everything you say, and have more insight.  Yet, all those years ago, she was broken and maybe needs to be repaired.  That, my friend, would never be your job.  I do think escape is great when one is old enough to accomplish it.  As for your poor sister and parents, you still must live. 
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Newt
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« Reply #10 on: March 25, 2015, 06:39:56 AM »

Yet, all those years ago, she was broken and maybe needs to be repaired.  That, my friend, would never be your job. 

This.  All those years between then and now do not go toward making it 'better'.  It festers and has to come out somewhere.  Generally in behaviour and it can only get worse as long as the cause is not addressed.  There is no healing without treatment.

It may be awful for those around her to live with but she has a wound that has been 'cooking' for eighteen years.
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« Reply #11 on: March 25, 2015, 06:47:47 AM »

It may be awful for those around her to live with but she has a wound that has been 'cooking' for eighteen years.

Agreed 100%.

I suffered abuse as a child and serious sexual abuse in 1983 when I was sixteen: the 1983 abuse flipped my personality entirely and I have never been the same, nor will I ever be the same as I was. All I can do is try to cope as best I can and your sister must try to do the same.  Bluesad
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