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October 25, 2014, 06:15:18 PM
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Badmovies.org Forum  |  Movies  |  Bad Movies  |  Well, you asked for it « previous next »
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Author Topic: Well, you asked for it  (Read 1093 times)
WyreWizard
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« on: January 20, 2009, 12:08:54 AM »

Yes, I made a post a few months ago asking you guys if you'd like to see me do a review of a certain film starring Lori Petty and Naomi Watts.  Get ready, badmoviephiles.

"When the little blue bird who has never said a word starts to sing. When the little blue bell at the bottom of the dell starts to ring.  When the little blue clerk in the middle of his work starts to tune to the moon up above.  It is nature that is all that is telling us to fall in love.  And that's why birds do it, bees do it.  Even educated fleas do it.  Lets do it, lets fall in love.  They've got plans against their wish do it.  Even amazing kind of fish do it.  Lets do it, lets fall in love.  I've heard that lizards and frogs do it lyin on a log.  They say that roosters do it with a duelin cock!"

Yup, Tank Girl!!!!  One of my favorite flicks of the 90s.  Tank Girl was in my opinion a very good film.  Based on the cult comic of the same name.  But even it had its share of reality flaws.

 Buggedout Comet Hits the Earth  In the story, it is claimed that much of the Earth's water was lost when a comet hit.  Umm, if a comet really hit the Earth, a lot more would be lost than just the water.  Remember Comet Schumaker-Levy 9?  Remember what happened when that comet broke apart and hit Jupiter?  Did you see those massive mushroom clouds when the fragments hit?  Those mushroom clouds were more than big enough to engulf the Earth.  So if a comet hit the Earth, there'd be no more Earth.

 Hatred Kessler  Yes Tank Girl's main antagonist, Kessler.  In a future world like that, you'd expect there to be a checks and balance system to keep an evil and insane man like that from rising to power.  Not only does he rule that world, but he controls all the water and charges hefty fees for it.  You'd think some people would find his behavior completely unaccepatable and mount and offensive intended to remove him from power.  But no one does this until out heroine comes along.  Another implausibility about Kessler is the fact he survived a ripper attack in such terrible condition then a doctor from China comes long to cybernetically restore him by first cutting off his head.  Where exactly is his brain put? 

 BounceGiggle Rippers  Now these I find interesting, creatures which are a mix of human, dog and kangaroo.  Just how were they created?  Did someone inject them with a virus that modifies their genes to give them the qualities of all these animals?  Or are they clones?  What I find funny is one part where Tank Girl and Jet Girl are spying from them and they say they need something better to see.  So Tank Girl shoves the camera down her pants and the rippers are all smiling and hooting at what they see on the monitor.  They find normal human females attractive?  Strange...

 Question Those water extractors  You remember the part where Kessler is lying on that bed in very bad shape after the ripper attack and the doctor says she can do very little to help him then Kessler's assitant brings in a Chinese doctor who says he can do much more.  So the assistant stabs the first doctor in the back with a device which extracts all the water from her body.  Just how does that thing work?  Are we to believe it can not only drain the blood, but also filter out all the proteins, salts, organic compounds and blood cells so all that is left is water?  C'mon, even our best filters don't work that well and they wouldn't fit in a device that small.  The only way I figure it works is with nanotechnology.  But why isn't Nanotechnology applied elsewhere?

I look forward to hearing your arguments.  BEER FOR EVERYONE!!!
   
« Last Edit: January 20, 2009, 12:35:43 PM by WyreWizard » Logged

Babe, I'm leaving.  I must be on my way.  The time is drawing near.  The train is going.  I see it in your eyes.  The love beneath your tears.  And I'll be lonely without you.  And I'll need your love to see me through.  So please me.  My heart is your hands.  And I'll be missing you...
RCMerchant
Bela
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« Reply #1 on: January 20, 2009, 06:19:58 AM »

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\"Supernatural?...perhaps. Baloney?...Perhaps not!\" Bela Lugosi-the BLACK CAT (1934)


Interviewer-"Does Dracula ever end for you?"
Lugosi-"No. Dracula-never ends."





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Doctor Menard
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« Reply #2 on: January 20, 2009, 08:12:04 AM »

It's morning. I was getting ready for work. Now I have to wake up again.
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peter johnson
Frightening Fanatic of Horrible Cinema
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« Reply #3 on: January 20, 2009, 11:01:21 AM »

Still haven't seen this one -- everyone says I should -- maybe soon . . .
peter johnson/denny crane
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I have no idea what this means.
Doggett
Bustin' makes me feel good !
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I've seen things you people couldn't imagine...


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« Reply #4 on: January 20, 2009, 12:15:17 PM »

Tank Girl's one of my faves  Smile
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If God exists, why did he make me an atheist? Thats His first mistake.
WyreWizard
Bad Movie Lover
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Karma: -24
Posts: 273



« Reply #5 on: January 20, 2009, 12:40:24 PM »

Tell me, who is your favorite Ripper?  Mine is T-Saint.

Jet Girl:  "What were you?"
T-Saint:  "A cop."
Logged

Babe, I'm leaving.  I must be on my way.  The time is drawing near.  The train is going.  I see it in your eyes.  The love beneath your tears.  And I'll be lonely without you.  And I'll need your love to see me through.  So please me.  My heart is your hands.  And I'll be missing you...
WilliamWeird1313
B-Movie Site Webmaster
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Bad taste is just an acquired taste!!!


« Reply #6 on: January 20, 2009, 01:44:12 PM »

Tell me, who is your favorite Ripper?  Mine is T-Saint.

Jet Girl:  "What were you?"
T-Saint:  "A cop."


I always liked the "Jack Kerouac" leader.

"Laugh, you butterfly that dances in the mud.
Laugh you piece of dental floss. You burn me, nasty.
Laugh, you pig that flies in the sky with rainbow Twinkie filling,
and 3 liters of high octane petrol."

Logged

"On a mountain of skulls in a castle of pain, I sat on a throne of blood. What was will be, what is will be no more. Now is the season of evil." - Vigo (former Carpathian warlord and one-time Slayer lyric-writer)
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