Stupid things that deathly horrify you?

[TheDope]

Confession time: I haven't been posting as much on the forum as I used to, because I am consistently afraid I may come across one of The Darksider's posts.  And it's not because I dislike The Daksider - he's a great guy and has always been decent with me and all - but I have, since a wee child, had an intense, horrific fear of the "individual" he has an a avatar. 

Alfred E. Newman.

Urrgh; just typing that name makes me cringe in revulsion.

Laugh all you want, but the mascot for Mad Magazine has scared me since I was a child and he still does to this day.  Those blank vacant eyes; the ears, big like Venus flytraps just waiting to snap down and eat my soul; that nasty gap-toothed sneer.

I don't even know why I'm so scared of him still to this day - you'd think you would outgrow stupid childhood fears like this.  But I haven't.  I still hate Alfred E. Newman.

And don't take this the wrong way, DS; this is in no way an indictment to try and force you to change your avatar - a character you no doubt find silly, amusing, even cute (??).  I'm just addressing my own insecurities and anxieties. 

Thanks.  Feeling better now.  Still scared of Alfred E. Newman, but better. 

I probably won't even check back on this posting, seeing as how I'm sure DS will respond (again, no insult to you at all, DS - love you like a brother, just not the avatar.  Brrrrrrr....).

So, how about it - anyone else here have irrational fears that plague them still to this day?  We're all friends here, no laughing or calling-out.  Let's just share....

[akiratubo]

The Squid

Any indoor body of water larger than a bathtub has The Squid in it.  ALL outdoor bodies of water have The Squid in them.  The Squid will only attack if I'm in the water by myself.  If there is someone else in the water with me, The Squid will not attack.  If the body of water is large and the other person is too far away, The Squid *might* attack.  There has to be someone else *in* the water with me.  If they're just on dry land watching me swim, The Squid will attack.  The Squid is transparent, rendering him invisible in the water, so it doesn't matter if I can see to the bottom or not.  It doesn't matter if someone else dives in before me and is not attacked by The Squid.  The Squid will only attack me, this is because I escaped from The Squid when I was a child.  The Squid has been out to get me ever since.

[zombie no.one]

I have a deathly revulsion to the colour turquoise.

I do not know why 

thanks.

[Saucerman]

Centipedes.  Seriously.  Can't function around them. 

[ghouck]

Fear is a product of common sense, therefore, I am afraid of NOTHING. . .

[Dave M]

Check out the Genesis Of Alphred E Newman, it's freaky:
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Alfred_E._Neuman

Lately, heights on TV kind of disturb me. Just lately, and just on TV. Like when people on TV are in a balloon or on top of a building, I freak out a little.

[Pilgermann]

I'm still creeped out by them, but I used to be deathly horrified of "aliens" with the big heads, huge black eyes and whatnot.  If I'd seen Communion as a kid I think it would have ruined my life.  I still haven't seen it save for a few clips but it's unsettling. 
To this day when I'm in my basement at night I'll imagine something horrible looking in at me through one of the tiny basement windows, usually a hideous scrawny thing with huge, soulless black eyes.  :(

[Joe the Destroyer]

Spiders.

The thought that here is a spider possibly within four feet of me, and there's nothing I can do about it terrifies me.

If a spider touches me, I go into something like a state of shock where I twitch uncontrollably for minutes at a time.

If I'm sitting at the table and I begin to think about spiders, I have to pull my legs out from under the table. 

I watched a show on spiders in Australia.  I have noted never to go there.  F**king huntsman spider and his f**king love for car interiors.  I don't care if it's completely harmless, or if anyone can touch it without being bitten.  The only thing I'm touching it with is the bottom of my boot at 90 MPH. 

The only thing creepier than spiders is the tailless whip scorpion, and thank God it doesn't live anywhere near here.  That thing does not look like an animal, it looks like a demon created through the blasphemous ritual of Pazuzu having sex with a tarantula. 

Sometimes when I go to buy bananas from the store, I think of the isolated incidents and urban myths of people being bitten by banana spiders.  It makes me want to go grab a steak and be thankful that there are no beef spiders as I put the delicious, artery-clogging goodness in my mouth. 

I always thought that if spiders ever learned to fly, I would probably either throw myself off a building, or at least start buying Depends to keep my pants clean every time I go for a walk.

Now that I've typed all this, I begun to look around the apartment.  I don't see any spiders, and I know they're probably not there, but I can almost sense them.  They're invisible, watching me and thinking of a nice, juicy Joeburger, wrapped in silk and dissolving into what probably tastes like a Joeshake. 

But what they don't know is: I'm packing.  Raid all the way.   

[Mr. DS]

Confession time: I haven't been posting as much on the forum as I used to, because I am consistently afraid I may come across one of The Darksider's posts.  And it's not because I dislike The Daksider - he's a great guy and has always been decent with me and all - but I have, since a wee child, had an intense, horrific fear of the "individual" he has an a avatar.

Actually you've reminded me that I've had that avatar for more than a few weeks.   Its up for change soon so don't worry, you'll be able to sleep at night again.   

Mirroring what Joe said, I am deathly afraid of spiders and most bugs.   The ones thats really freak me out are silverfish...

Disgusting vile creatures they are.  I work with mostly ladies at work so you can only imagine how much flack I get because of my fear. 

[Doggett]

It has the cold, dead, eyes of a seriel killer.

[Trevor]

Having lived through thirteen years of a devastating civil war in Rhodesia / Zimbabwe, I can say that I'm not afraid of much really.

However I have a few fears which have positive sides:

1. I hate flying. I have to for business sometimes, but I'm 100% OK once I'm in the air and enjoy the view, even that one time in October 2006 when I flew from Cape Town to Johannesburg and Samuel L Jackson was on the plane. 

2. I have a morbid fear of deep water and drowning. Yet, I love the sea ~ whenever I'm in Durban or Cape Town or anywhere that has a sea, I will go see and greet it.

3. I hate heights. But, I love the view from up there wherever I am.

4. I am afraid of getting burnt, but I love a good warming fire.

5. I am scared of dying in a car accident but I love driving anything that I am licensed to. The only thing I've never driven is a bus: Sandra Bullock beat me to it. 

 

[schmendrik]

Jellyfish. I'm not much of a swimming fan anyway, but if I know there is a danger of being stung in the water, I really, really am not going into it. And in places like Australia where I hear the stingers will actually kill you... well, I think I'll stick to the desert if I ever go there.

There's something else about the ocean that I can't quite put a name to. I've been on ships at sea and that was fine. I've been out in storms and that was fine too. But the highest waves I saw, that were splashing over the deck and up onto the bridge WAY above the surface were only about 15-20 feet according to the officer I asked. I can't even think about 30 or 40 foot waves. I will never watch THE PERFECT STORM. I can hardly think about it.

Also during that storm there was a man overboard alarm. It turned out to be false, just some trash in the water. But something about the idea of being out in the water, all alone, miles from shore... it really gets to me in ways I can't describe. When I heard that alarm I just got this awful sick feeling deep in the pit of my stomach. For that reason I also have no interest in that movie where the couple on a diving vacation find themselves marooned out at sea when the boat leaves without them. Even without the sharks, I can hardly get through the trailers of that one.

[meQal]

I have a fear of ice skates. I am convinced someone will run over my fingers and cut them off with a pair of them.

[WingedSerpent]

Pointy water knobs-especially in bath tubs.  We use to have them and when ever I took a bath or shower, I would be extra carefull when moving around.  I was afraid I would fall and land on one of them and hit my eyes. 

Really, anything that gets near the eye gives me the creeps.  I don't think I could ever wear contacts

[indianasmith]

Nancy Pelosi!!  (shudders!!)