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Badmovies.org Forum  |  Movies  |  Good Movies  |  Star Trek plot holes explained...The Trouble with Quibbles « previous next »
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Author Topic: Star Trek plot holes explained...The Trouble with Quibbles  (Read 5570 times)
Doggett
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« on: May 11, 2009, 07:25:47 AM »

Copied and pasted from an imdb poster.


1) How can a supernova destroy an entire galaxy? - Because it was a really BIIIIGGGG supernova.

2) How can a mining ship outgun a federation starship? - Because the mining ship mines guns. DUH

3) What was the purpose of young Kirk destroying a rare vintage Corvette? - To cash in on the insurance money so he can buy a crappy hover motorcycle.

4) How did Kirk get to be first officer while he was still a cadet? - Because Starfleet had to make him captain before the movie was over.

5) Why was Spock and Uhura making out in the middle of a crisis? - Because it's just sooooooooooo naughty.

6) Why didn't the three divers encounter heat resistance upon entering Vulcan's atmosphere? - Because they had tiny little fans in their helmets, of course.

7) How could Spock witness the destruction of Vulcan from another planet which wasn't a Vulcan moon? - Because he has super Spock eyes.

8) What was Nero doing for 25 years? - Aiming all weapons at that damn black hole waiting on slow azz Spock.

9) Why did Spock start dating Uhura? - 'Cause he ain't gay, that's why.

10) Why didn't the diving team just bring phasers? - Because Sulu's swiss army sword was waaaaaaaayyyyyy cooler.

11) Why does the bridge of the Enterprise have a windshield instead of a viewscreen? - Because Uhura is hot and Starfleet wants the whole galaxy to see that sweet thang.

12) Why does the enterprise bridge look like a hair salon? - No, I'm askin'.

13) Why didn't Spock eventually make his way to the federation outpost which was in walking distance? - Because of that big, scary, mean thingy.

14) How did Scotty suddenly become the head of engineering when he was an intruder? - Because he's good friends with the captain who was also an intruder.

15) Why didn't Spock just throw Kirk in the brig? - 'Cause Spock ain't stupid, he saw the way Uhura was checking out Kirk's package.

16) Why are there turbines on a starship? - Because JJ Abrams misread the Middle-Eastern cultural diversity memo from the studio.

17) Why do old Star Trek fans have a problem with this movie? - Because old people like story-type stuff like back in ancient times. They don't like action-type stuff like us really smart young people.

NOW TAKE THAT, YOU STAR TREK HATERS! ARE YOU SATISFIED NOW?


I'm convinced that the poster nicked it from someone eles.
It's far too funny to come from an imdb poster.
« Last Edit: May 11, 2009, 12:39:15 PM by doggett » Logged

                                             

If God exists, why did he make me an atheist? Thats His first mistake.
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« Reply #1 on: May 11, 2009, 11:41:07 AM »

Nice one doggett and I agree about the post being too clever for IMDB. but you should have named this post "The Trouble with Quibbles".

Sorry my geek is showing.
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Jumping Kings and Making Haste Ain't my Cup of Meat
Doggett
Bustin' makes me feel good !
Frightening Fanatic of Horrible Cinema
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Karma: 967
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I've seen things you people couldn't imagine...


WWW
« Reply #2 on: May 11, 2009, 12:40:15 PM »

Nice one doggett and I agree about the post being too clever for IMDB. but you should have named this post "The Trouble with Quibbles".

Sorry my geek is showing.

Nope.
Changed it just for you,HR.
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If God exists, why did he make me an atheist? Thats His first mistake.
Newt
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I want to be Ripley when I grow up.


« Reply #3 on: May 15, 2009, 05:54:35 PM »

This reminds me of some song lyrics Derf posted a while back (about halfway down the page):
http://www.badmovies.org/forum/index.php/topic,114668.0.html

And the video (also thanks to Derf!):
http://www.badmovies.org/forum/index.php/topic,118904.0.html
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Frogger
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« Reply #4 on: July 09, 2009, 12:03:54 PM »

Awful film....

very funny.  Smile

Two questions?

Why the hell did they drill into the planet when that red matter creates black holes? seriously.. Why bother? Fire it onto the planet...

Also how come the first battle lasted a nice long time period but when the fleet (The joke of a fleet crewed by a bunch of students as all the other ships where elsewhere) managed to last a few seconds? lol 

Very stupid film. Wish I had saved my money.  Thumbdown
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