(NOTE: Please go easy on me, it's my first review.)REPO! The Genetic Opera
Copyright Company and Date: 2008 Lionsgate Films and Twisted Pictures
Submitted by SPazzoTHE CHARACTERS
Shilo Wallace: A seventeen year old goth girl, and the heroine of this strange and bizarre opera. She is kept in her room by her protective father. Very reminiscent of Avril Lavigne.
Repo Man/Nathan Wallace:
ANTHONY STEWART HEAD! The man who this movie was named after, and Shilo's father. He tells Shilo that he's a doctor, but he's really out killing poor people for his boss. He starts out good, turns bad, turns good, turns bad, gets shot, turns good, and dies.
Rotti Largo: A very rich Italian man, and the CEO of the GeneCo Corp. He decided to finance organs for people, but if they don't pay, he sends Nathan after them. He also wears a toupee.
Blind Mag: A famous opera singer, owned by Rotti Largo and the GeneCo Corp. All Rights Reserved. Her eyes can do more than just see. Fence posts don't agree with her.
Amber Sweet: PARIS HILTON! Rotti's bratty daughter. Addicted to the knife, and painkillers. She also wears skimpy leather and has some hunky bodyguards with her at all times. Paris Hilton finally has a role just perfect for her.
Luigi Largo: One of Rotti Largo's sons. He likes to kill people and rip his shirt open. Is trying to steal his fathers company. He also is a big fan of the F-word.
Pavi Largo: The other one of Rotti's sons. Is also trying to steal his father's company. He likes to take women's faces and attach them to his face, WHILE receiving a bj.
Graverobber: The narrator of this tale. He likes to open up graves, take out the bodies, insert a syringe into the nose of the body, draw out some blue liquid and sell it on the street as a drug. YUMMY! It's nice to see that Eric Draven from the Crow has found work.
Marni: Shilo's dead mother. She sings, is best friends with Blind Mag, betrays men, and dies.
Various Genterns: The sexy nurses that work for GeneCo. The only reason to watch this movie.LESSONS LEARNED
In the year 2054, they will still be using cameras from the year 1900.
Taking Zydrate is a very sexual process.
Details about celebrities contracts are published in fashion magazines.
Watching a comic book is the best way to find out more about important characters.
Making sexual movements with your hands while little bouncy noises play in the background means you're tough.
In the future, renaissance fairs will offer booths for getting skin grafts.
Even though being a Repo man is a thankless job, somebody has to do it.
If you put your arm up a persons open stomach, you can make them sing like a puppet.STUFF TO WATCH FOR
1 min: So, am I watching a comic book?
5 min: RANDOM ACT OF VIOLENCE AGAINST A HOOKER
13 min: She's BALD?
22 min: So, now is everybody dropping the F-bomb or what?
41 min: Paris Hilton in skimpy leather. Just what I've always wanted to see!
58 min: Hey, is that Joan Jett? No, it must be a guy...
70 min: RANDOM GRATUITOUS BREAST SHOT!
72 min: RANDOM ACT OF VIOLENCE AGAINST PARIS HILTON'S FACE!
89 min: I guess this really is an opera; everybody dies.
92 min: So I guess Paris will inherit everything. Just like real life!NOTABLE QUOTES
Pavi Largo: The most dashing, panty snatching, I will leave your diapers dripping!
Rotti: I'm Rotti Largo.
Shilo: I know.
Rotti: I own Geneco.
Shilo: Please let me go!
Nathan: What chance has a seventeen year old girl?
Shilo: I don't know what I was thinking / There's no sense in girlish dreaming / I'm just seventeen. Seventeen. / But it's better than forty!
Nathan: If you poop in my pool, don't ask me to go and take a dip. THE PLOT
REPO! The Genetic Opera, is, in fact, an opera. It is not a musical, but an opera. I didn't know there was a difference, but according to the DVD, there is! With a musical a scene will play out like normal, then everyone will sing about it. With an opera, the whole movie is singing! Every scene is a song. Now ask yourself, is this for me?
While you're thinking about that, I'll get onto the plot. In the future, the general population of the world likes to get organ transplants for fun. But organs are expensive, so the transplatees need to make payments. What happens if you miss a payment? Well, the company who runs all of this sends out a repo man to brutally murder you and take your organs while your body is thrown into a mass grave. Lovely!
While this is all happening we meet our heroine. The young and a bit goth Shilo Wallace. She has a blood dieses and can't go outside. Her father, Nathan, is a “doctor” who is the one keeping her inside. Cut to Nathan's secret lab, and boom! He's the Repo Man. SURPRISE!
While all of this is happening, you start to realize. This movie seems a little goth. It also seems a little bit like SAW. AND it also seems a little bit like Rocky Horror. I can just see the brainstorm room now... “Hey everyone, let's take the violence of SAW, the gothness of The Crow, and the singing of Rocky Horror and mix it all together and see what happens!” Now, reading that last sentence may make it seem like it's a good thing. It's not.
Nathan works for the company GeneCo which is run by Rotti Largo. Now, Rotti used to love Marni (who ran away with Nathan) but because she left him, he killed her and blamed it on Nathan. Rotti is dying so he tries to get Shilo to take over the company because his kids (Pavi, Luigi, and
Amber) are all after the company. Rotti also has a contract that Blind Mag, the famous singer and Marni's former best friend, has to do whatever he says.
Did you get all that?
The climax of this opera takes place at (surprise again) AN OPERA! GeneCo runs a “Genetic Opera” where organ transplantees go and testify. All this happens while the hot nurses of the film make out on stage and single moms flash the camera. Why can't tent revivals be more like this?
Now, Shilo sneaks out to the Genetic Opera without her dad knowing. Meanwhile, Nathan is asked to kill Mag, but he refuses. Shilo learns that she must kill the Repo Man. Meanwhile Nathan (the Repo Man) is trying to find Shilo. At this point I'm thinking that this could end badly.
Will Shilo kill her father? Will Nathan stop Rotti? Who will inherit GeneCo? What will happen at the Genetic Opera? Do we really care? In the end there is a very cute message about letting go of your kids, while the message for kids is to still love your parents. What a wonderful message in a SAW style slash of gore! This is exactly what I would show my kids!
The movie does all end up good, for those of you who were worried. If you liked the Crow, The Rocky Horror (Picture) Show, or SAW I would recommend it. If you hate musicals for some strange reason, stay far away.