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Badmovies.org Forum  |  Other Topics  |  Television  |  THE BEST MYSTERY SCIENCE THEATER 3000 riffs « previous next »
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Author Topic: THE BEST MYSTERY SCIENCE THEATER 3000 riffs  (Read 59596 times)
HappyGilmore
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« Reply #255 on: April 27, 2011, 08:15:47 PM »

Jack Frost
Small | Large


Some of the riffs:

"Every time I meet a man, he's either gay or a bear."
"Am I un-BEAR-able?"
"Curse you and your bucket full of Rogaine."
"Ewww, Salmon breath."

There's another one I like, earlier in the film not seen in this video, where Mike points out:
"Well, looks like a plot point is the knitting of socks, so it looks like we're in for a fun ride, boys."
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"The path to Heaven runs through miles of clouded Hell."

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AndyC
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« Reply #256 on: April 27, 2011, 09:32:11 PM »

The beginning of The Final Sacrifice, where Satoris does nothing but grin at the masked Rowsdower.

Mike: You brought the face mask, you nut.

Crow: I think the movie's going really well.

Servo: I don't know, I'm just happy.
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ChaosTheory
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« Reply #257 on: April 29, 2011, 08:36:57 PM »

From PARTS:

Richard: I found something in the river I think might be from America
Professor Dick Sargent: In the river? What is it?
Crow: It's a Gambino.



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Rev. Powell
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« Reply #258 on: April 30, 2011, 12:51:58 PM »

"Hired Part 1 short"

CROW (pretending to read a dossier on the new salesman): "...AKA the 'pantsless salesman... or the 'piddling peddler'!"

BRIDE OF THE MONSTER

JOEL: "I thought being killed by an octopus was supposed to be a peaceful death?"

Lugosi: "I will create a race of atomic supermen who will conquer the world!"
JOEL: "Anyway, that's my dream, how about you?"

JOEL: "You know, that's not something you see everyday---a Bela Lugosi stand-in carrying a lady in a wedding dress."
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"[It has] a special Zombie Puppet Cam that lets you see all the people die at Puppet Level! It's one thing to say, 'I wonder what it would look like if a puppet with a dentist's drill in his head ran straight at your brain and just drilled his way right through.' But it's another, entirely DIFFERENT thing when you say 'What would the same thing look like if you were eight inches high so all you could see was this enormous blood-spouting brain?'"-Joe Bob on PUPPET MASTER
AndyC
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« Reply #259 on: May 02, 2011, 06:54:10 PM »

The Incredibly Strange Creatures Who Stopped Living and Became Mixed-Up Zombies. Hard to actually repeat it all here, but I love when a musical number starts and the guys sing something that fits the music perfectly, such as The Little Drummer Boy, Silent Night, Harper Valley PTA and others. And also during the romantic solo performance, when they sing along with random lines from other songs.

Starting at about 5:10
Small | Large

Crow gets the best lines here.
"Livin' on reds, vitamin C and cocaine."
"I really love your peaches, wanna shake your tree."
"My anaconda don't want none unless you got buns, hon."
 BounceGiggle
« Last Edit: May 02, 2011, 07:00:48 PM by AndyC » Logged

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Rev. Powell
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« Reply #260 on: May 07, 2011, 11:12:21 AM »

Hired, Part II

JOEL: "Weíre gonna have leadership the way my old man taught me! You, put a handkerchief on your head! You, swat at imaginary elves!"

MANOS

TOM: "So what are we, about a half-hour into the movie?"
JOEL: "No, about a minute."
TOM: "Huh."

CROW: "This is going to turn into a snuff film, isn't it Joel?"

JOEL: "Every frame of this movie looks like someone's last known photograph."
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"[It has] a special Zombie Puppet Cam that lets you see all the people die at Puppet Level! It's one thing to say, 'I wonder what it would look like if a puppet with a dentist's drill in his head ran straight at your brain and just drilled his way right through.' But it's another, entirely DIFFERENT thing when you say 'What would the same thing look like if you were eight inches high so all you could see was this enormous blood-spouting brain?'"-Joe Bob on PUPPET MASTER
AndyC
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« Reply #261 on: May 07, 2011, 05:45:04 PM »

The Incredibly Strange Creatures....

Mike: And Joan Collins is checked into the boards.
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AndyC
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« Reply #262 on: May 09, 2011, 09:52:08 AM »

Sidehackers:

J.C.: We'll see what kind of game he's playing.
Servo: Othello? Hungry Hungry Hippos? Chutes and Ladders? Candyland maybe.
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HappyGilmore
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« Reply #263 on: May 10, 2011, 08:52:59 PM »

The Beast of Yucca Flats
Small | Large


"Heh, Tor Johnson as the Beast? That's just smart casting."
"I figured Tor Johnson would play the Butler."
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"The path to Heaven runs through miles of clouded Hell."

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Itís where my demons hide, itís where my demons hide.
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« Reply #264 on: May 14, 2011, 11:05:00 AM »

WARRIOR OF THE LOST WORLD

[The opening image is blurry from the heat rising off the asphalt highway]
JOEL: You know, it's not so much the apocalypse, it's the humidity.

[Motorcyclist goes up in flames]
JOEL: Another Buddhist protesting the helmet laws.

[Megaweapon is crushing the hero's annoying talking motorcycle under his wheel]
ALL: MEG-A-WEAPON! MEG-A-WEAPON!
TOM: Make it last, Megaweapon...
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"[It has] a special Zombie Puppet Cam that lets you see all the people die at Puppet Level! It's one thing to say, 'I wonder what it would look like if a puppet with a dentist's drill in his head ran straight at your brain and just drilled his way right through.' But it's another, entirely DIFFERENT thing when you say 'What would the same thing look like if you were eight inches high so all you could see was this enormous blood-spouting brain?'"-Joe Bob on PUPPET MASTER
Trevor
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« Reply #265 on: May 16, 2011, 04:23:43 AM »

From PARTS:

Richard: I found something in the river I think might be from America
Professor Dick Sargent: In the river? What is it?
Crow: It's a Gambino.

 BounceGiggle BounceGiggle
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bob
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« Reply #266 on: May 17, 2011, 03:17:32 PM »

The Beast of Yucca Flats
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=A5xqLqZkIOQ&feature=related

"Heh, Tor Johnson as the Beast? That's just smart casting."
"I figured Tor Johnson would play the Butler."


Just saw that on NetFlix and I was going to post the video. Good stuff!
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AndyC
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« Reply #267 on: May 19, 2011, 09:25:52 AM »

Sidehackers:

(Rommel has a phony-looking blood smear on his cheek)
Servo: Uh, you got a little...
Crow: Looks like that jelly doughnut got away on him.
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AndyC
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« Reply #268 on: May 19, 2011, 10:07:48 PM »

Posture Pals:

Narrator: Shoulders back, arms are easy at the sides, look straight ahead...
Joel: And you truck like the doodah man.
Servo: Oh, got your chips cashed in.

(Ms. Martin walks straight ahead, turns and walks back)
Servo: Here she reenacts her first DUI.

Narrator: She shows them the importance of good foot position.
Joel: Uh, Ms. Martin has a little too much free time on her hands.

(On seeing a poorly-drawn leaning house on the blackboard)
Joel: Miss Martin! Tommy drew a bong!

Narrator: Tommy reminds Jimmy when Jimmy stands off balance.
Crow: Tears of shame pour down Tommy's face.

Crow: Mom's dress matches the wallpaper!

Narrator: Jane's father has a way of reminding Jane when she forgets.
Servo: All right, honey, I'm gonna kill this tree if you don't stand straight.
Narrator: A young plant shouldn't be bent like that.
Joel: Then stop doing it!

(Boy's silhouette walks onscreen)
Crow: Hey, it's Hitchcock.
Servo: After Slim Fast.
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Rev. Powell
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« Reply #269 on: May 22, 2011, 11:56:43 AM »

SWAMP DIAMONDS

["Touch" Conners' girlfriend has fallen into the swamp, where an alligator approaches.  It's very obvious the actress was filmed in a swimming pool nowhere near the action.]

Girl [splashing]: Help!
TOM: Just stand up, your in the shallow end!
["Touch" Conners rips off his shirt and dives in the water after her]
CROW: Wait, how's he going to get to the pool where she is?

TOM: Wouldn't it be funny if they just turned out to be swamp cubic zirconias?
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"[It has] a special Zombie Puppet Cam that lets you see all the people die at Puppet Level! It's one thing to say, 'I wonder what it would look like if a puppet with a dentist's drill in his head ran straight at your brain and just drilled his way right through.' But it's another, entirely DIFFERENT thing when you say 'What would the same thing look like if you were eight inches high so all you could see was this enormous blood-spouting brain?'"-Joe Bob on PUPPET MASTER
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