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Badmovies.org Forum  |  Other Topics  |  Television  |  THE BEST MYSTERY SCIENCE THEATER 3000 riffs « previous next »
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Author Topic: THE BEST MYSTERY SCIENCE THEATER 3000 riffs  (Read 398441 times)
Rev. Powell
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« Reply #480 on: December 06, 2014, 04:33:56 PM »

GODZILLA VS. MEGALON

Guy: What are they trying to do, wipe us out?
JOEL: Yeah, I hate those wacky morning DJs!

["Seatopia" dancers dance in funny white costumes]
JOEL: Say, these Klan meetings have really lightened up!

[During battle scene]
TOM: I know I should be excited and scared and all, but all I can think about is sweaty Japanese guys.
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Rev. Powell
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« Reply #481 on: December 16, 2014, 11:01:54 PM »

GODZILLA VS. THE SEA MONSTER

[All riffs take place during the scenes where villagers dance to awaken Mothra]

TOM: Rockin' its way to #1, it's "Mothra, You Are Our God." It's got a great beat and you can worship to it!

CROW: How can something sarong be so right?

TOM: It's the Mothra Graham Dance Troupe!
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Trevor
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« Reply #482 on: December 17, 2014, 03:47:40 AM »

MITCHELL

Joel: "Oh, let's see: I see Meatloaf, I see Van Morrison and I see Spoooooocccckkkkkk."  TeddyR TeddyR
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Rev. Powell
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« Reply #483 on: January 17, 2015, 06:58:02 PM »

"Alphabet Antics" short

[Livestock are being loaded on a plane]
Narrator: ..and maybe a cute little piggie or two!
CROW: But now you have to call them 'flight attendants.'

DADDY-O

Dick Contino: C'mon, guys, she coulda pulled away from me in two seconds with that car!
JOEL: Sure, but she was delirious from the smell of bleach.

[Elderly waitress serves Cokes and walks away]
CROW: Thanks mom! Nice caboose... what am I saying?

[Portly villain is pacing with worried expression]
CROW: When is that butter going to get here?
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I'll take you places the hand of man has not yet set foot...
Trevor
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« Reply #484 on: January 21, 2015, 01:00:09 AM »

[Portly villain is pacing with worried expression]
CROW: When is that butter going to get here?

 TeddyR TeddyR
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I know I can make it on my own if I try, but I'm searching for the Great Heart
To stand me by, underneath the African sky
A Great Heart to stand me by.
Trevor
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« Reply #485 on: January 21, 2015, 01:01:24 AM »

THE BRUTE MAN

[Detective enters boss's office]

Crow [singsong voice]: "How are things in homicide?"  TeddyR TeddyR
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I know I can make it on my own if I try, but I'm searching for the Great Heart
To stand me by, underneath the African sky
A Great Heart to stand me by.
Rev. Powell
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« Reply #486 on: January 31, 2015, 12:59:48 PM »

THE AMAZING COLOSSAL MAN

[Nurse peeks under Glen Manning's sheet just after his hospitalization and gasps]
TOM: Well, SOMETHING'S much bigger than we thought!

Glen: I don't want to grow anymore...
JOEL: I'm a Toys-r-Us kid.
Glen: I DON'T WANT TO GROW ANYMORE!
JOEL: I'M A TOYS-R-US KID!

Doctor: ...since the heart is made up of a single cell...
TOM:: What?!
[Doctor continues mumbo-jumbo explanation]
CROW: You're not a real doctor, are you?
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I'll take you places the hand of man has not yet set foot...
Rev. Powell
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« Reply #487 on: February 07, 2015, 12:03:51 PM »

FUGITIVE ALIEN

[Woman hears voiceover narration while wandering through the desert]
JOEL: I gotta lay off the shrooms!

ALL: He tried to kill me with a forklift!

[Every time someone says the name "Rocky"]
CROW: Again?
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I'll take you places the hand of man has not yet set foot...
Trevor
Uncle Zombie and Eminent Shitologist
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« Reply #488 on: February 13, 2015, 04:33:10 AM »

MITCHELL

[A groggy Mitchell gets out of the car]

Cop: "You coming, Mitchell?"
Mitchell: "Yeah."
Tom: "You got any moist towelettes, rags, toilet paper or something?"  TeddyR
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I know I can make it on my own if I try, but I'm searching for the Great Heart
To stand me by, underneath the African sky
A Great Heart to stand me by.
Rev. Powell
Global Moderator
B-Movie Kraken
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« Reply #489 on: February 14, 2015, 08:18:54 PM »

IT CONQUERED THE WORLD

[Title appears in credits]
TOM: They're giving away the ending!

Peter Graves: Paul Nelson here.
TOM: Gunsmoke, nah, it’ll never work, call my brother!
Peter Graves: That’s impossible!
CROW: Mission: Impossible! That sounds great!

Peter Graves: Listen, you know, in the last 24 hours, men have had their minds, their personalities, their moral standards imprisoned? The whole population has been herded like cattle into the desert! That men have been murdered for failing to obey their new master?
TOM: Yeah, I hate the 700 Club too.
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I'll take you places the hand of man has not yet set foot...
Trevor
Uncle Zombie and Eminent Shitologist
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« Reply #490 on: February 17, 2015, 01:21:19 AM »

THE BRUTE MAN

[Poultry truck drives out of a gas station]

Crow [panicked]: "There's no driver! The chickens are taking over!"  TeddyR
Logged

I know I can make it on my own if I try, but I'm searching for the Great Heart
To stand me by, underneath the African sky
A Great Heart to stand me by.
ChaosTheory
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« Reply #491 on: February 19, 2015, 07:40:30 PM »

THE UNEARTHLY:

Tor Johnson: "Time for go to bed."
Joel: "Well said!"

Angry Guy is lashing out at Tor.
Servo: "Tor feel unappreciated."
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Through the darkness of future past
The magician longs to see
One chance opts between two worlds
Fire walk with me
Rev. Powell
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« Reply #492 on: March 14, 2015, 12:26:31 PM »

STAR FORCE: FUGITIVE ALIEN 2

Ken: We did it!
CROW: We did it! We killed 20 minutes of movie!

[Captain Joe wakes up from being knocked out]
JOEL: You know, it's the funniest sensation, the room's not spinning.

CROW: Filmed in Convoluto-vision!
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I'll take you places the hand of man has not yet set foot...
Rev. Powell
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B-Movie Kraken
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« Reply #493 on: March 21, 2015, 02:58:36 PM »

"Mr. B-Natural"

JOEL: Is this Liberace's mom?

JOEL: Oscar Wilde only wished he was this gay.

WAR OF THE COLOSSAL BEAST

Army guy: What makes you so sure you're going to find him?
CROW: He's 69 flippin' feet tall!

CROW: My nurse fell down his throat!

[Police discuss setting up a roadblock]
CROW: A roadblock? Why don't you just draw a line on the highway and tell him not to cross it?
CROW:
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I'll take you places the hand of man has not yet set foot...
Trevor
Uncle Zombie and Eminent Shitologist
B-Movie Kraken
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« Reply #494 on: April 24, 2015, 04:27:00 AM »

THE LEECH WOMAN

Tom: "Why does he have a single meatball in his inbox?"   Buggedout TeddyR
Logged

I know I can make it on my own if I try, but I'm searching for the Great Heart
To stand me by, underneath the African sky
A Great Heart to stand me by.
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Badmovies.org Forum  |  Other Topics  |  Television  |  THE BEST MYSTERY SCIENCE THEATER 3000 riffs « previous next »
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