STUPIDEST criticism of a movie you ever heard!

[BoyScoutKevin]

Criticism is opinion, but facts are facts, and when you get those wrong . . . ?

And I don't know any film critic who got more of his facts wrong, then Roger Ebert in his review of "Lair of the White Worm."

"on an archaeological dig in the wilds of Scotland"
Wrong! The archaeologicalist was Scottish, as he came from the Orkney Islands in Scotland, but the dig was in a remote area of Derbyshire, which is in England.

"who has made his find in the barnyard of the Trent Sisters"
Wrong! The archaeologist made his find in the front yard of the Trent Sisters' B&B. Actually, you never even seen a barn in the whole film.

"when he disappeared during a spelunking expedition in a nearby cave."
Wrong! He, refered to the Trent Sisters' father disappeared one night in Temple Grove coming home from the local pub. Along with his wife, who also disappeared.

"that the worm of Stone Rigg Cavern manifest itself in human form"
Wrong! Ebert must be thinking of the book, where the worm mainfests itself in both human and worm form. But the worm in the film never manifests itself in human form, but is always seen as a worm.

That many mistakes makes me wonder, whether Ebert even saw the film, before he wrote his review of it. Thus, the mistakes made bother me far more than any stupid or not so stupid criticism he made about the film.

[LilCerberus]

A single sentence synopsis from TV Guide:
Horror Planet - Yet another scientist vs. monster in outer space movie.

[Jim H]

People who complain that, in the case of video game movies, they could have just transferred the plot to a movie and not lost anything. Sorry, but things get lost any time you move a narrative from one media to another. Case in point: Silent Hill. Yes, the games have interesting plots and characters, but you find out about a lot of that plot through exploration and piecing together clues you get over 20+ hours of play. I'm sorry, but watching characters wander around for extended periods of time is tedious in "Let's Plays", let alone actual films.

Well, Silent Hill could have been a quite literal adaptation with minor trimmings, the same deal with Resident Evil and some other video game movies.  Resident Evil, in particular, could easily be condensed into a quite enjoyable 100 minute film (for what it's worth, I did find the first film entertaining).  I think the first Silent Hill game could have been adapted mostly literally with only minor alterations for the movie format. 

For the most part, I think criticisms like WyreWizard's are the stupidest.  Films breaking reality is half the point of many genres.  In particular, people who criticize films with giant, impossible creatures.

[Joe the Destroyer]

Not a criticism, but I seem to remember a blurb for Son of Godzilla that described the plot as being Godzilla and his son fighting off a swarm of deadly manti and spiders being sent at them by a mad scientist.  I'm guessing whoever wrote that blurb didn't actually watch the movie, and probably just had it on in the background.

A critic on Amazon also reviewed the first volume of Excel Saga with the same level accuracy, referring to Menchi as a cat and calling Excel's organization ACTION instead ACROSS.

[The Gravekeeper]

People who complain that, in the case of video game movies, they could have just transferred the plot to a movie and not lost anything. Sorry, but things get lost any time you move a narrative from one media to another. Case in point: Silent Hill. Yes, the games have interesting plots and characters, but you find out about a lot of that plot through exploration and piecing together clues you get over 20+ hours of play. I'm sorry, but watching characters wander around for extended periods of time is tedious in "Let's Plays", let alone actual films.

Well, Silent Hill could have been a quite literal adaptation with minor trimmings, the same deal with Resident Evil and some other video game movies.  Resident Evil, in particular, could easily be condensed into a quite enjoyable 100 minute film (for what it's worth, I did find the first film entertaining).  I think the first Silent Hill game could have been adapted mostly literally with only minor alterations for the movie format. 

For the most part, I think criticisms like WyreWizard's are the stupidest.  Films breaking reality is half the point of many genres.  In particular, people who criticize films with giant, impossible creatures.

I'm not saying that some games don't lend themselves pretty well to film adaptations, just that some parts will always be lost. Even if you transferred the plot, for a horror game the atmosphere would either be diminished or altered simply because a film audience isn't nearly as immersed as a video game player. For example, say a character comes up to a door where something bad might be hiding behind it. A film audience might think "I don't want that character to go in there," whereas a video game player might think "I don't want to go in there." All I'm getting at is that people shouldn't expect the movie to play out exactly like the game.

For the record, I enjoyed the Silent Hill movie, too. I thought the last act kinda ran out of steam, though.

[diamondwaspvenom]

I've heard and read plenty of stupid film criticism in my life. Here is a short list of some of the most idiotic complaints against a movie that I've ever heard:

1) "Friday the 13th part 5 sucks 'cause Jason wasn't in it!". Funnily enough, most of the fans that bash this entry in the Friday the 13th saga are the same ones who praise the Jason-less original.

2) "I hated Alien 3 because they killed off Hicks and Newt!". Considering the fact that I really didn't like Aliens, I was never bothered by the deaths of these two characters. Plus, hating a movie just because certain characters die is, in my opinion, a very poor excuse to hate the film.

3) "Halloween III is a piece of s*** because there's no Michael Myers!". If people bothered to do some research, they should know that the Halloween franchise was meant to become an anthology series after Michael's death. If they did, perhaps their judgement wouldn't be so overly negative.

 

[theedinburghbteam]

I went to see "Elite Squad" in the cinema, and it was an excellent movie, though quite depressing. This was understandable as it looked at drug dealers and paramilitary police forces in a run down favela in Rio.

Feeling very interested and amped up about the various issues brought up in the film, I was quite shocked when a wannabe film student lassie behind me starts on about "That film was good, but it was unrealistic. How could nothing happy happen? It was just all bad things after bad things."...I didn't even know what to say. Maybe she was expecting a song number.

[El Misfit]

I find it funny when ever someone saids that a movie is so bad that thwy complain that it is the worst movie ever made. I always wanted to say "Have you've seen Xanadu, Manos: The Hands of Fate, Monster A-Go Go, Leonard Part 6, or Troll 2? If you did, then this movie is a step up!"

[Trevor]

I was quite shocked when a wannabe film student lassie behind me starts on about "That film was good, but it was unrealistic. How could nothing happy happen? It was just all bad things after bad things."...I didn't even know what to say. Maybe she was expecting a song number.

I wonder what that student would say if she had to see Jans Rautenbach's Katrina: one of the most emotionally devastating films that I have ever seen. If you don't cry at the end of that film, you don't have tear ducts in your head.

[ImaginaryFoot]

This woman i lived with on and off for almost 8 years had this to say at the end of An American WereWolf In London- well that was just stupid,why did they have to shoot him?  She wasnt the sharpest knife in the drawer

[Doggett]

This from the imbd:

Bad: It had a lot of flaws in this movie. I don't know some of them, in case you understand.




 

[Barack Clinton]

 I agree with judge death, the attack on "avatar" up to the point of some people calling for it to be rated "R" was the stupidest thing I'd seen relating to criticizing a movie.

 The intolerance of the anti smokers has surpassed reason and entered into extreme fanaticism, which is the stupidest thing to do.