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SANCTUM (2011)

Started by The Burgomaster, February 06, 2011, 09:23:23 AM

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The Burgomaster

For a moment, I thought I was watching an Irwin Allen movie from 1976 . . .

Here's a movie that has:

* A cliche plot
* Cliche characters (all of them)
* Cliche dialogue

Plus, it's in 3-D, but if you see the 2-D version instead, you won't really be missing anything.

A bunch of explorers go into the jungle and get caught in a series of caverns, many of which are filled with water, while a tropical storm rages above.  Included are a dedicated adventurer, his alienated son, the a***ole who financed the expedition, a loyal native guide . . .  you get the picture: the usual cliche disaster movie cast of characters.

So, they hang from ropes, swim through narrow caverns, argue, cry, hug, and at the end you say to yourself, "I just spent two hours watching "POSEIDON ADVENTURE 2011."

Did I hate this movie?  No . . . it's a slick-looking B-movie, and I guess that's why I'm in this forum to begin with.  But if you go to see it, don't expect too much.

Also, this movie confirms my assessment that Ioan Gruffudd is one of the worst actors I've seen in years.  I thought the FANTASTIC FOUR movies might have been anomalies.  Not so.  He really is THAT BAD.


"Do not walk behind me, for I may not lead. Do not walk ahead of me, for I may not follow. Do not walk beside me either. Just pretty much leave me the hell alone."

Raffine

The trailers for this make it seem to be the most important motion picture event since Edison invented the whole thing. I smelled a neo-Allen form the git-go.

A CGI Shelley Winters plugging up the only escape hole might have been fun.

Thanks for your reviews, Burgomaster. You inspire me to do better.  :thumbup:
If you're an Andy Milligan fan there's no hope for you.

akiratubo

Quote from: The Burgomaster on February 06, 2011, 09:23:23 AM* A cliche plot
* Cliche characters (all of them)
* Cliche dialogue

I figured on this as soon as I heard, "From producer James Cameron".

It's a shame that he lost whatever he had when he made The Terminator and Aliens and now only makes generic b-movies with absurdly high budgets.
Kneel before Dr. Hell, the ruler of this world!

Jack

Quote from: The Burgomaster on February 06, 2011, 09:23:23 AM
"I just spent two hours watching "POSEIDON ADVENTURE 2011."

That reminds me, Titanic II is on SyFy tonight. 
The world is changed by your example, not by your opinion.

- Paulo Coelho

Archivist

Quote from: akiratubo on February 06, 2011, 10:38:05 AM
Quote from: The Burgomaster on February 06, 2011, 09:23:23 AM* A cliche plot
* Cliche characters (all of them)
* Cliche dialogue

I figured on this as soon as I heard, "From producer James Cameron".

It's a shame that he lost whatever he had when he made The Terminator and Aliens and now only makes generic b-movies with absurdly high budgets.

I couldn't stop ranting (in a bad way) about Avatar for a whole month after I saw it.  Looks like Sanctum will be on the big-avoid list now.
"Many others since have tried & failed at making a watchable parasite slug movie" - LilCerberus

theonlydevice007

For some time i went in the 70 movies