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September 30, 2014, 03:32:06 PM
534564 Posts in 40446 Topics by 5077 Members
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Badmovies.org Forum  |  Other Topics  |  Entertainment  |  Games  |  Make a sentence you're pretty sure no-one's said before! « previous next »
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Author Topic: Make a sentence you're pretty sure no-one's said before!  (Read 16323 times)
indianasmith
Archeologist, Theologian, Elder Scrolls Addict, and a
Frightening Fanatic of Horrible Cinema
****

Karma: 1398
Posts: 8192


A good bad movie is like popcorn for the soul!


« Reply #135 on: August 01, 2013, 01:11:41 PM »

If that were the first sentence of a novel, I would definitely read the rest!!!

Speaking of the first sentence of a bad novel, this was a finalist in the Bulwar-Litton award competition a few years back:

Like an overripe beefsteak tomato trimmed with cottage cheese, the corpulent body of Santa Claus lay sprawled on the hotel room floor. Buggedout
Logged

"Carpe diem!" - Seize the day!  "Carpe per diem!" - Seize the daily living allowance! "Carpe carp!" - Seize the fish!
"Carpe Ngo Diem!" - Seize the South Vietnamese Dictator!
retrorussell
Retro
Frightening Fanatic of Horrible Cinema
****

Karma: 771
Posts: 7425


BROTHA NOOMSIE!!!


« Reply #136 on: August 01, 2013, 02:37:47 PM »

My peaceful sleep was interrupted by the arrival of nipple-pinching pirates clad in armadillo roadkill skins.
Logged

HBO in space!<br />
ER
Frightening Fanatic of Horrible Cinema
****

Karma: 282
Posts: 1685



« Reply #137 on: August 01, 2013, 03:25:49 PM »

His shoes smelled of bubble gum and sulphur, giving away his most recent adultery.
Logged

Seeking Tir a 'nOg since 1978.
indianasmith
Archeologist, Theologian, Elder Scrolls Addict, and a
Frightening Fanatic of Horrible Cinema
****

Karma: 1398
Posts: 8192


A good bad movie is like popcorn for the soul!


« Reply #138 on: August 01, 2013, 04:31:42 PM »

Gorbachev sings tractors!  Turnip!! Buttocks!!

(I know, Berkeley Breathed said it in Bloom County!  But they are still perhaps the funniest five words to ever appear on the comics page.)
Logged

"Carpe diem!" - Seize the day!  "Carpe per diem!" - Seize the daily living allowance! "Carpe carp!" - Seize the fish!
"Carpe Ngo Diem!" - Seize the South Vietnamese Dictator!
ER
Frightening Fanatic of Horrible Cinema
****

Karma: 282
Posts: 1685



« Reply #139 on: August 01, 2013, 04:37:33 PM »

When the world was young and he quite old, the titan stole glances at the newborn and wondered what havoc this race of gods would set loose upon creation.
Logged

Seeking Tir a 'nOg since 1978.
ER
Frightening Fanatic of Horrible Cinema
****

Karma: 282
Posts: 1685



« Reply #140 on: August 04, 2013, 10:45:12 AM »

Seventy-seven silver scarecrows shot scalding swords skyward shouting soliloquies sung sans softness so seductively stated sleeping Satan stirred, sobered, seethed, silenced seventy-six, saying simply, "Shush!" shot scarecrow seventy-six scorn so stately shown she scarcely screamed, sending sonorous strangling sounds starward, southward, sabotaging Salisbury's scoldingly stagnant September services.
Logged

Seeking Tir a 'nOg since 1978.
retrorussell
Retro
Frightening Fanatic of Horrible Cinema
****

Karma: 771
Posts: 7425


BROTHA NOOMSIE!!!


« Reply #141 on: August 04, 2013, 02:12:01 PM »

Calmly squeezing my buttocks, I jumped out the window and landed on the perfectly arranged stack of Rosie O'Donnell heads.
Logged

HBO in space!<br />
ER
Frightening Fanatic of Horrible Cinema
****

Karma: 282
Posts: 1685



« Reply #142 on: August 05, 2013, 09:08:48 AM »

"I find The Prisoner of Azkaban erotic," she whispered.
Logged

Seeking Tir a 'nOg since 1978.
indianasmith
Archeologist, Theologian, Elder Scrolls Addict, and a
Frightening Fanatic of Horrible Cinema
****

Karma: 1398
Posts: 8192


A good bad movie is like popcorn for the soul!


« Reply #143 on: August 05, 2013, 12:13:06 PM »

Using Trevor's underpants as a parachute, I leaped out the Vatican window with a jar of pickles and a bag of rhinoceros excrement.
Logged

"Carpe diem!" - Seize the day!  "Carpe per diem!" - Seize the daily living allowance! "Carpe carp!" - Seize the fish!
"Carpe Ngo Diem!" - Seize the South Vietnamese Dictator!
ER
Frightening Fanatic of Horrible Cinema
****

Karma: 282
Posts: 1685



« Reply #144 on: August 06, 2013, 09:29:31 AM »

"Would you like to vote today?" the demon asked, handing me a ballot wherein all five candidates bore the same name.
Logged

Seeking Tir a 'nOg since 1978.
ER
Frightening Fanatic of Horrible Cinema
****

Karma: 282
Posts: 1685



« Reply #145 on: August 09, 2013, 09:56:30 AM »

When it comes to apocalypses, rank amateurs make the best professionals.
Logged

Seeking Tir a 'nOg since 1978.
retrorussell
Retro
Frightening Fanatic of Horrible Cinema
****

Karma: 771
Posts: 7425


BROTHA NOOMSIE!!!


« Reply #146 on: August 09, 2013, 02:05:40 PM »

Under your bed at precisely 10am you will find a diseased ocelot hacking up the remains of Alistair Crowley.
Logged

HBO in space!<br />
A.J. Bauer
A German Expressionist and a
Frightening Fanatic of Horrible Cinema
****

Karma: 177
Posts: 2479



« Reply #147 on: August 19, 2013, 11:15:41 PM »

The Xbox ONE looks terrific!
Logged

indianasmith
Archeologist, Theologian, Elder Scrolls Addict, and a
Frightening Fanatic of Horrible Cinema
****

Karma: 1398
Posts: 8192


A good bad movie is like popcorn for the soul!


« Reply #148 on: August 19, 2013, 11:47:39 PM »

Paquita gently squeezed the Hostess Snoballs, imagining the face of Kristen Stewart.
Logged

"Carpe diem!" - Seize the day!  "Carpe per diem!" - Seize the daily living allowance! "Carpe carp!" - Seize the fish!
"Carpe Ngo Diem!" - Seize the South Vietnamese Dictator!
retrorussell
Retro
Frightening Fanatic of Horrible Cinema
****

Karma: 771
Posts: 7425


BROTHA NOOMSIE!!!


« Reply #149 on: August 19, 2013, 11:53:42 PM »

A pair of hydrocephalic lesbians catered some Scandinavian rat hair pizza to my doorstep at approximately 7:30AM this morning; I tipped them with a Street Fighter II pog.
Logged

HBO in space!<br />
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