Bad Movie Logo
"A website to the detriment of good film"
Custom Search
HOMEB-MOVIE REVIEWSREADER REVIEWSFORUMINTERVIEWSUPDATESABOUT
Welcome, Guest. Please login or register.
Did you miss your activation email?
October 25, 2014, 07:04:25 AM
536238 Posts in 40573 Topics by 5098 Members
Latest Member: AqueousStar
Badmovies.org Forum  |  Other Topics  |  Off Topic Discussion  |  Riddles « previous next »
Pages: 1 [2] 3 4
Author Topic: Riddles  (Read 4863 times)
Allhallowsday
B-Movie Kraken
*****

Karma: 1544
Posts: 10847


Either he's dead or my watch has stopped!


« Reply #15 on: March 10, 2011, 08:07:48 PM »

A father and son get in a car crash. The two are sent to separate hospitals.

The doctor comes in to operate on the son. The doctor refuses to operate saying "I cannot operate on this boy. He's my son!"

Who is the doctor?
His mother.
Logged

If you want to view paradise . . . simply look around and view it!
A.J. Bauer
A German Expressionist and a
Frightening Fanatic of Horrible Cinema
****

Karma: 178
Posts: 2488



« Reply #16 on: March 10, 2011, 08:17:36 PM »

A father and son get in a car crash. The two are sent to separate hospitals.

The doctor comes in to operate on the son. The doctor refuses to operate saying "I cannot operate on this boy. He's my son!"

Who is the doctor?
His mother.

THANK YOU!! NOBODY EVER GETS THAT ONE!
Logged

bob
I survived Bucky Larson
Frightening Fanatic of Horrible Cinema
****

Karma: 202
Posts: 3584


Torgo watches you masterbate!


« Reply #17 on: March 10, 2011, 08:58:55 PM »

A father and son get in a car crash. The two are sent to separate hospitals.

The doctor comes in to operate on the son. The doctor refuses to operate saying "I cannot operate on this boy. He's my son!"

Who is the doctor?
His mother.

THANK YOU!! NOBODY EVER GETS THAT ONE!

For some reason in a high school math class a teacher started the class by asking that to us. Years later I still don't know why she did.
Logged

track the movies you watch in 2014
http://www.badmovies.org/forum/index.php/topic,142132.0.html

Kubrick, Nolan, Hitchcock, Tarantino, Wan - the elite



I believe in the international communist conspiracy to sap and impurify all of our precious bodily fluids.
ghouck
Frightening Fanatic of Horrible Cinema
****

Karma: 583
Posts: 3750


Afro-Mullets RULE!


WWW
« Reply #18 on: March 10, 2011, 09:58:10 PM »

How do you take a condom off an elephant?
Logged

Raw bacon is GREAT! It's like regular bacon, only faster, and it doesn't burn the roof of your mouth!

Happiness is green text in the "Stuff To Watch For" section.

James James: The man so nice, they named him twice.

"Aw man, this thong is chafing my balls" -Lloyd Kaufman in Poultrygeist.

"There's always time for lubricant" -Orlando Jones in Evolution
indianasmith
Archeologist, Theologian, Elder Scrolls Addict, and a
Frightening Fanatic of Horrible Cinema
****

Karma: 1405
Posts: 8244


A good bad movie is like popcorn for the soul!


« Reply #19 on: March 10, 2011, 11:58:38 PM »

Why would an elephant be wearing a condom when their population is so endangered?
Logged

"Carpe diem!" - Seize the day!  "Carpe per diem!" - Seize the daily living allowance! "Carpe carp!" - Seize the fish!
"Carpe Ngo Diem!" - Seize the South Vietnamese Dictator!
Allhallowsday
B-Movie Kraken
*****

Karma: 1544
Posts: 10847


Either he's dead or my watch has stopped!


« Reply #20 on: March 11, 2011, 12:07:33 AM »

...THANK YOU!! NOBODY EVER GETS THAT ONE!
What's the difference between a saloon and an elephant's fart??  Question
Logged

If you want to view paradise . . . simply look around and view it!
ghouck
Frightening Fanatic of Horrible Cinema
****

Karma: 583
Posts: 3750


Afro-Mullets RULE!


WWW
« Reply #21 on: March 11, 2011, 12:07:45 AM »

Why would an elephant be wearing a condom when their population is so endangered?

Perhaps due to the most popular reason they are used: to help fight the spread of disease?
Logged

Raw bacon is GREAT! It's like regular bacon, only faster, and it doesn't burn the roof of your mouth!

Happiness is green text in the "Stuff To Watch For" section.

James James: The man so nice, they named him twice.

"Aw man, this thong is chafing my balls" -Lloyd Kaufman in Poultrygeist.

"There's always time for lubricant" -Orlando Jones in Evolution
A.J. Bauer
A German Expressionist and a
Frightening Fanatic of Horrible Cinema
****

Karma: 178
Posts: 2488



« Reply #22 on: March 11, 2011, 12:13:27 AM »

Why would an elephant be wearing a condom when their population is so endangered?

Perhaps due to the most popular reason they are used: to help fight the spread of disease?

I heard AIDS was caused by some guy who sodomized a monkey. I don't know if it's true but it sure would be funny.
Logged

ghouck
Frightening Fanatic of Horrible Cinema
****

Karma: 583
Posts: 3750


Afro-Mullets RULE!


WWW
« Reply #23 on: March 11, 2011, 12:15:51 AM »

Why would an elephant be wearing a condom when their population is so endangered?

Perhaps due to the most popular reason they are used: to help fight the spread of disease?

I heard AIDS was caused by some guy who sodomized a monkey. I don't know if it's true but it sure would be funny.

Not if you were the monkey :)
Logged

Raw bacon is GREAT! It's like regular bacon, only faster, and it doesn't burn the roof of your mouth!

Happiness is green text in the "Stuff To Watch For" section.

James James: The man so nice, they named him twice.

"Aw man, this thong is chafing my balls" -Lloyd Kaufman in Poultrygeist.

"There's always time for lubricant" -Orlando Jones in Evolution
A.J. Bauer
A German Expressionist and a
Frightening Fanatic of Horrible Cinema
****

Karma: 178
Posts: 2488



« Reply #24 on: March 11, 2011, 12:25:14 AM »

Why would an elephant be wearing a condom when their population is so endangered?

Perhaps due to the most popular reason they are used: to help fight the spread of disease?

I heard AIDS was caused by some guy who sodomized a monkey. I don't know if it's true but it sure would be funny.

Not if you were the monkey :)

Not if you're and AIDS patient either. You're dying because some guy f**ked a monkey, how 'bout that?
Logged

Allhallowsday
B-Movie Kraken
*****

Karma: 1544
Posts: 10847


Either he's dead or my watch has stopped!


« Reply #25 on: March 11, 2011, 12:31:52 AM »

...
I heard AIDS was caused by some guy who sodomized a monkey. I don't know if it's true but it sure would be funny.
I think the theory was a kind of cross contamination through a bite or more likely by consuming monkey meat; then human intercourse spread the virus. 
Logged

If you want to view paradise . . . simply look around and view it!
Mofo Rising
Global Moderator
Frightening Fanatic of Horrible Cinema
****

Karma: 436
Posts: 3148


My cat can eat a whole watermelon!


WWW
« Reply #26 on: March 11, 2011, 03:41:57 AM »

Why would an elephant be wearing a condom when their population is so endangered?

Perhaps due to the most popular reason they are used: to help fight the spread of disease?

I heard AIDS was caused by some guy who sodomized a monkey. I don't know if it's true but it sure would be funny.

Not if you were the monkey :)

Not if you're and AIDS patient either. You're dying because some guy f**ked a monkey, how 'bout that?

To be fair, maybe that's exactly what that monkey needed at that moment. A little wine, a little romance...

On a more serious note, viruses show the distressing ability to jump species. After all, they don't care who hosts them, as long as they're getting attention. There is a reason why the "swine flu" and "avian flu" epidemics are named what they are.

Allhallowsday is correct in the current thinking of the origin of HIV, but the truth is no one right now knows exactly where it arose. The "some guy f**ked a monkey" story is hold-over from the '80s, when AIDS was viewed as a strictly homosexual disease. Some randy dude deserves what he got, eh? A bit facile and fun to talk about, but not quite so much fun when you look at the true damage the disease is causing worldwide. Especially if you actually know somebody who has died of AIDS.

That's a downer, though. Ghouck, you've got me stumped. How do you get a condom off an elephant?
Logged

Every dead body that is not exterminated becomes one of them. It gets up and kills. The people it kills, get up and kill.
Trevor
Chief Troublemaker / Gratis Monster at Badmovies.org
B-Movie Kraken
*****

Karma: 870
Posts: 11073



WWW
« Reply #27 on: March 11, 2011, 03:53:46 AM »

That's a downer, though. Ghouck, you've got me stumped. How do you get a condom off an elephant?

Ask nicely and then remove it. Carefully.  Buggedout Buggedout

What do you get if you cross an owl with a bungee cord?
Logged
RCMerchant
Bela
B-Movie Kraken
*****

Karma: 0
Posts: 10924


"Charlie,we're in HELL!"-"yeah,ain't it groovy?!"


WWW
« Reply #28 on: March 11, 2011, 07:17:39 AM »

That's a downer, though. Ghouck, you've got me stumped. How do you get a condom off an elephant?

Ask nicely and then remove it. Carefully.  Buggedout Buggedout

What do you get if you cross an owl with a bungee cord?

Bouncing hooters?  Question
Logged

\"Supernatural?...perhaps. Baloney?...Perhaps not!\" Bela Lugosi-the BLACK CAT (1934)


Interviewer-"Does Dracula ever end for you?"
Lugosi-"No. Dracula-never ends."





http://www.tumblr.com/dashboard
http://www.tumblr.com/dashboard
http://rcmerchant.tumblr.com/
Trevor
Chief Troublemaker / Gratis Monster at Badmovies.org
B-Movie Kraken
*****

Karma: 870
Posts: 11073



WWW
« Reply #29 on: March 11, 2011, 07:29:50 AM »

That's a downer, though. Ghouck, you've got me stumped. How do you get a condom off an elephant?

Ask nicely and then remove it. Carefully.  Buggedout Buggedout

What do you get if you cross an owl with a bungee cord?

Bouncing hooters?  Question

 BounceGiggle BounceGiggle

That's better than the reply in Kung Pow Enter The Fist: "My ass."  Question I still don't get it.
Logged
Pages: 1 [2] 3 4
Badmovies.org Forum  |  Other Topics  |  Off Topic Discussion  |  Riddles « previous next »
    Jump to:  


    RSS Feed Subscribe Subscribe by RSS
    Email Subscribe Subscribe by Email


    Popular Articles
    How To Find A Bad Movie

    The Champions of Justice

    Plan 9 from Outer Space

    Manos, The Hands of Fate

    Podcast: Todd the Convenience Store Clerk

    Faster, Pussycat! Kill! Kill!

    Dragonball: The Magic Begins

    Cool As Ice

    The Educational Archives: Driver's Ed

    Godzilla vs. Monster Zero

    Do you have a zombie plan?

    FROM THE BADMOVIES.ORG ARCHIVES
    ImageThe Giant Claw - Slime drop

    Earth is visited by a GIANT ANTIMATTER SPACE BUZZARD! Gawk at the amazingly bad bird puppet, or chuckle over the silly dialog. This is one of the greatest b-movies ever made.

    Lesson Learned:
    • Osmosis: os·mo·sis (oz-mo'sis, os-) n., 1. When a bird eats something.

    Subscribe to Badmovies.org and get updates by email:

    HOME B-Movie Reviews Reader Reviews Forum Interviews TV Shows Advertising Information Sideshows Links Contact

    Badmovies.org is owned and operated by Andrew Borntreger. All original content is © 1998 - 2014 by its respective author(s). Image, video, and audio files are used in accordance with the Fair Use Law, and are property of the film copyright holders. You may freely link to any page (.html or .php) on this website, but reproduction in any other form must be authorized by the copyright holder.