Suicide

[LilCerberus]

Often.

First tried when I was eight, last when I was nineteen.

Last I recall thinking about it, was '96. I was drunk. I don't think it was the last time I thought about it, but it was the last time I gave it serious consideration.

[HappyGilmore]

I've thought about it a few times.  Never consciously tried anything, like slitting my wrists or anything.

However, I've had plenty of long nights where I assume, in some part of my subconscious, I was thinking of dying.  There were plenty of nights where I'd mixed all sorts of drugs and alcohol and instead of going to the ER for help, I quietly curled into a ball and lie there, vomiting, shivering, wondering why I was alive.  Then, the next morning, managed to wake up, feeling like sh*t, taking a warm shower, and thinking, "Well, if I survived that round, I must be alive for some reason."

[Killer Bees]

I never thought about suicide.  It always seemed like a lot of effort.

But lately I've been fantasising about getting in a car accident or accidentally falling off a tall building and being injured to the point where I get amnesia and forget about everything and everyone.  A few months in hospital where I don't have to go to my lousy job or pay rent or any of those pesky human things that have to be done.

Then I could start fresh without any heartache or depression.  That would make me feel better about my life right now.

[Couchtr26]

Thought about it being lonely high school.  On that same note, I think back on it more and it is more pleas for attention from peers I think.  I always felt like no one listened to me or heard me.  Now, I don't care.  It makes me thankful that I didn't think more seriously and how things work out better.  For those, who were more serious in thinking or attempting I'm happy that you are still here and I have had a chance to speak or know you in some way. 

[Olivia Bauer]

Never attempted it, but I've contemplated it. Too cowardly to go through with it. Even when I feel like s**t I still value my life.

[JaseSF]

I've considered it but mainly when I was a young geeky loser in school everyone picked on. That feeling of not being accepted was large in parcel of why I considered such a thing. I was a huge old bottle of anger too at that point that could easily be set off by the littlest thing until I realized my anger was only hurting those I cared about. I learned to let it go, forgive the past and forge ahead with my life. I never forgot it though. Still I did think about it but then I also realized it was sort of chickening out and deep down I wanted to overcome and rise above. I also thought about my parents who are to this day the best people I know on the planet and I could never hurt them so. I'm very glad I never took things that far as I would have missed out on a lot of wonderful and good things since then. Trying to be more positive in life has become a big goal of mine and I've noticed I'm happiest when I strive for this.

[Ed, Ego and Superego]

Not really... I have been very low at times after my life pretty much imploded... Sit and watch daytime TV in my underwear all day kind of low.   But something inside me just kept me moving forward, it made me get up shower, eat, shave (thats very important), dress and get out.  Eventually things got better.   But I have never felt like ending it.

Bees, maybe now its time to do all that WITHOUT the accident and hospital.  Just a thought...

-Ed

[Flick James]

I never thought about suicide.  It always seemed like a lot of effort.

But lately I've been fantasising about getting in a car accident or accidentally falling off a tall building and being injured to the point where I get amnesia and forget about everything and everyone.  A few months in hospital where I don't have to go to my lousy job or pay rent or any of those pesky human things that have to be done.

Then I could start fresh without any heartache or depression.  That would make me feel better about my life right now.

KB. Noting your avatar and having not seen much of you around, and your generally upbeat posts, I'm wondering if you are doing okay these days. I sure hope so. You always strike me as a kind soul and just a neat lady all around.