If you could remake a movie; what would it be and how would you change it?

[SaintMort]

I have two big ones, one that I'm 100% serious about and one that's mostly a joke.

The Joke would be "John Tucker Must Die"... I saw this in theaters and was disappointed. I had written an awesome dark comedy in my head that the film never was for a second. The movie is about a bunch of b***hy girls that want to humiliate the most popular guy in school because he never took them on a second date. My movie idea was (like heathers) they actually are attempting to kill him. However things get in the way and they keep killing innocent bystanders by accident. Jon Tucker is always at the scene of the crime and thus gets framed as being the murderer.

For real though... I want to remake 1991's Popcorn. For those of you who haven't seen the original, a group of kids throw an all night horror movie marathon showing films from the 50's and 60's. The films are hilarious 'mock-movies' like Mosquito and the amazing electric man. Throughout the screenings people are getting murdered by an unknown killer. My pitch would be to repeat the general premise (becuase it still works) but instead of having one director do everything you hire 3 comedy directors to direct the 3 films. You also update it so the films are from the 80's instead of the 50's. Then you get a real horror director (or I guess if I can swing it... myself... it is a dream scenario) to film the actual horror movie wrap-around.

[Skull]

Breakout from Oppression (1978)

I like the idea of the story but the story itself wasnt working... so I wrote a new script based upon the idea with a chilling theme to the story.



Although I cannot call what I did is a remake or a copy to the original movie.

[Doggett]

Kissing Jessica Stein.


I'd make her stay a lesbian!
 

[etmoviesb]

Babylon A.D., but I will leave Mathieu Kassovitz free to do as he think*... So it will probably a decent movie instead of the bad movie we got in the 2008.
*If you do not understand, check the FAQ of Babylon A.D. in IMDB page.

[JaseSF]

The Trollenberg Terror - I'd give it a more ambigious conclusion and leave open room for a sequel.

Explorers - the aliens wouldn't be a joke.

[etmoviesb]

I almost forgot the obvious: Star Wars! But I would force the director to read all Darths & Droids.

[The Burgomaster]

THE WARRIORS - The original is a fun piece of bad cinema (Michael Beck as a gang leader?  Would you follow him into the mean streets and back alleys of New York?)  I'd like to see a gritty version with gut-wrenching violence and a really hot female lead.  Too bad David Patrick Kelly is too old to play Luther.

[Flick James]

I would remake most of John Water's films and the only change I would make is that I would give them a running time of 0 minutes.

[InformationGeek]

THE WARRIORS - ...I'd like to see a gritty version with gut-wrenching violence...

And that is the sort of thing that would turn me off of seeing the film.  It works fine as it is and by up-ing the violence on it, you might end up distracting people away from everything with the shock value.


Jaws 4:  First, I would have the guys make a brand new mechanical shark because the original was in very poor shape.  Then, I would add more shark attacks and throw out the character of Jake or his ridicious accent.  From there, I would rewrite a lot of the plot or at least explain why the shark is hunting everyone down.  Finally, I'll make sure not to show the shark very much like the original Jaws.  The more you see the monster in a horror film, the less impact it has on people.  However, I would keep the score and invite back Michael Caine for a cameo just for fun.

[Kaseykockroach]

MONSUIER VERDOUX- Chaplin would get away in the end.

NIGHT OF THE LEPUS- Have the rabbits talk, and be voiced by James Earl Jones. Have the rabbits break into a musical number, singing "I'm Just Wild About Hare-y", growing machine guns out of their backsides due to a mutation, the little girl would be played by Dakota Fanning (and get eaten by a rabbit), etc.

NIGHT OF THE COMET- More zombie action, please. No CGI, though, keep the make-up.

HERCULES-Hades wins.

THE STAR WARS PREQUELS- Jar Jar Binks turns out to be the criminal mastermind behind it all, Lord Sith being merely his accomplice. He was only acting retarded and annoying just as a brilliant ploy.

TOY STORY 3- The toys are roasted in the furnace, then the credits roll.

WALL-E: Wall-E loses his memory, EVE loses WALL-E forever. Everyone starves to death trying to plant pizza plants.

TRASFORMERS 3: Everyone dies. I go home a slightly happier boy. The End.

[WingedSerpent]

Since I'm a more visiual person I can give some examples of how I'd update some designs.
The Creeping Terror
I'd give the creatures an H.R, Giger bio-mechanical overhall to expand on the idea that they were living robots sent to planets to collect data on the inhabitants.

Manos: The Hands of Fate
The Master's look would draw from the Raelian leader (that UFO cult that claimed to have cloned a human a few years back)
  His laair would look more like Stonehenge with five pillars sort of arching towards alter at the center, essentially forming a giant hand structure.  I'd give some more hints that Torgo wasn't entirelly human.

[InformationGeek]

NIGHT OF THE LEPUS-  the little girl would be played by Dakota Fanning (and get eaten by a rabbit), etc.

Couldn't work now.  She's about to enter college.  Heck, her little sister couldn't even work nowadays.

HERCULES-Hades wins.

TOY STORY 3- The toys are roasted in the furnace, then the credits roll.

WALL-E: Wall-E loses his memory, EVE loses WALL-E forever. Everyone starves to death trying to plant pizza plants.

Well ain't you a ball of sunshine.  Did you ever work on Grave of the Fireflies or When the Wind Blows by any chance?

Also, now how I would remake The Dark Knight is by keeping almost everything the same, but change everyone into ponies, change art direction, and make it more a parody.  Not because I would think it would be any good, I would do it just so I could invite everyone here to a screening and video tape your reaction.   

I was inspired by this parody trailer I just discovered the other day:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Sfu_Zn5zkX4
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[El Misfit]

hmm, Transformers by making the main character more of what the original character shoulda been. Also, I would make the Robots to be STOP MOTION instead of that CGi crap you see nowadays. Also, I won't make the story based solely on the humans and won't pull a fast one outta my ass Michael Bay!!!!

[Skull]

THE STAR WARS PREQUELS- Jar Jar Binks turns out to be the criminal mastermind behind it all, Lord Sith being merely his accomplice. He was only acting retarded and annoying just as a brilliant ploy.

 

Actually all you need to do is make Padmé the plot from the dark side in Episode 3 and Obi-Wan Kenobi kills her and steals the unborn kids, Anakin Skywalker knew she was pregnant but didnt know about Twins...

Everything would make sense since the intent was to find Anakin and turn him into the darkside.

[Trevor]

Not a remake, but I would give William Shatner a couple of $million to re-do the largely terrible visual FX in Star Trek V which was IMO that film's only weak point.