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Badmovies.org Forum  |  Movies  |  Bad Movies  |  RULES GOVERNING MONSTERS IN BAD FILMS « previous next »
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Author Topic: RULES GOVERNING MONSTERS IN BAD FILMS  (Read 2951 times)
alandhopewell
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« on: August 02, 2012, 01:48:51 PM »

     Add to the list as you think of them.

     1- If there is more than a dozen of the same type of monster in a film, said monsters may be fatally shot.
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« Reply #1 on: August 02, 2012, 03:18:36 PM »

2) A monster can eat any number of human beings without any loss of appetite.
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« Reply #2 on: August 02, 2012, 04:12:28 PM »

3) Monsters move much slower when someone is watching them, often slowing down to a shuffle.
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AndyC
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« Reply #3 on: August 02, 2012, 04:51:34 PM »

4. The distance between a monster and a fleeing person is in no way related to the speed at which the two are moving. A slow monster can easily catch or overtake a fast person. Inversely, a fast monster can take an unusually long time to catch a slow, stumbling person. In the course of a chase, the distance between human and monster can suddenly increase or decrease in an instant, sometimes fluctuating back and forth. The distance can also appear longer or shorter depending on which point of view the audience is shown.
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RCMerchant
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« Reply #4 on: August 02, 2012, 04:53:52 PM »

5. If a girl faints-a monster will carry them away.
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« Reply #5 on: August 02, 2012, 04:55:59 PM »

Nuclear Radiation does not kill reptiles and invertebrates, it just transforms them into giant, hideously strong monsters!
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« Reply #6 on: August 02, 2012, 05:57:07 PM »

Even though made of meat like the rest of us, weapons have no effect.
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« Reply #7 on: August 02, 2012, 06:17:58 PM »

8. Mostly mindless killing machines not fearing light or authority, monsters are extremely self conscious and will avoid being seen in daylight.
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AndyC
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« Reply #8 on: August 02, 2012, 06:20:17 PM »

A monster's deadliness is inversely proportionate to the importance of the character it is attacking. A minor character might be killed before he even knows what hit him, while the hero can wrestle with the monster for several minutes and suffer only superficial injuries.
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« Reply #9 on: August 02, 2012, 08:00:11 PM »

At no point does altering somethings DNA though science or mutation every make something more passive or friendlier. 

On that note, using convicts or soldiers for your experiments is never a good idea. 



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« Reply #10 on: August 02, 2012, 08:13:32 PM »

At no point does altering somethings DNA though science or mutation every make something more passive or friendlier. 

On that note, using convicts or soldiers for your experiments is never a good idea. 


Further to that rule, it is relatively rare for random mutation to result in illness, disability, death or pointless malformation. More often, mutation results in properly-formed claws and/or fangs, combined human/animal traits, enhanced physical abilities and even special powers.
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« Reply #11 on: August 02, 2012, 08:31:55 PM »

11) A monster, especially a giant one, will eventually attack a major city landmark of some sort usually destroying it, sometimes more than one will be demolished and even on occasion said monster seems to become a threat to an whole nation if not the world.
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« Reply #12 on: August 02, 2012, 10:13:15 PM »

Many monsters will instinctively avoid authority figures, slipping away quietly before they are seen by police or parents. This does not preclude them sneaking up on those people at some later time.

Eating people will weaken this instinct, and after a particularly large binge, monsters have been known to start attacking whole groups of people in plain sight.
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« Reply #13 on: August 03, 2012, 06:45:10 AM »

Almost all monsters have the ability to magically upgrade any weapon fired at them to infinite ammo capacity.
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alandhopewell
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« Reply #14 on: August 03, 2012, 12:53:23 PM »

     If the monster is some sort of oversized arthropod, it must make an annoying whirring noise.
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If it's true what they say, that GOD created us in His image, then why should we not love creating, and why should we not continue to do so, as carefully and ethically as we can, on whatever scale we're capable of?

     The choice is simple; refuse to create, and refuse to grow, or build, with care and love.
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