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Author Topic: I'm back: miss me?  (Read 6663 times)
Trevor
Uncle Zombie and Eminent Shitologist
B-Movie Kraken
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Posts: 22708



« on: October 01, 2012, 04:46:10 AM »

Gas masks at the ready........ Buggedout

I had an OK leave: the only thing that un-nerved me to the extent I posted about it over the weekend (and then later deleted the post) was that Mom got married last Friday which left me feeling bereft and numb all over. I was aware that things were getting serious between her and her man, but things are happening a little too fast for me to take it all in at once. I wasn't present at the wedding as Mom is home in the Western Cape now but I now have to deal with the fact that I have yet again been discarded in my life.  Bluesad
Logged

I know I can make it on my own if I try, but I'm searching for the Great Heart
To stand me by, underneath the African sky
A Great Heart to stand me by.
indianasmith
Archeologist, Theologian, Elder Scrolls Addict, and a
B-Movie Kraken
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Karma: 2591
Posts: 15182


A good bad movie is like popcorn for the soul!


« Reply #1 on: October 01, 2012, 06:16:18 AM »

You're looking at it altogether wrong, Trevor.  You have NOT been discarded.  You've simply gained a new family member, and your mom has decided to chase after happiness and love.  You are BOTH winners in this scenario!  It's just gonna feel a little awkward at first.
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"I shall smite you in the nostrils with a rod of iron, and wax your spleen with Efferdent!!"
Newt
Mostly Harmless. Mostly.
Frightening Fanatic of Horrible Cinema
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Karma: 856
Posts: 3715


I want to be Ripley when I grow up.


« Reply #2 on: October 01, 2012, 07:51:21 AM »

Oh Trevor.  I'm so sorry to hear you felt that way (past tense intentional), even momentarily.

This place - Badmovies.org - has always reminded me of Spider Robinson's Callahan's Saloon (and not just for the puns). The main point being what is known as Callahan's Law (also known as the Law of Conservation of Pain and Joy): "Shared pain is lessened; shared joy, increased"  I know you have found the truth of the first part here just as I know you have the heart for the second.  Sharing your mom's life and affections with someone she loves can only increase the happiness around all of you.  It's OK: your family just got bigger.  
« Last Edit: October 01, 2012, 09:06:20 AM by Newt » Logged

"May I offer you a Peek Frean?" - Walter Bishop
"Thank you for appreciating my descent into deviant behavior, Mr. Reese." - Harold Finch
tracy
Inventor of the Turnip Twaddler and
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Karma: 309
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« Reply #3 on: October 01, 2012, 01:01:29 PM »

You're looking at it altogether wrong, Trevor.  You have NOT been discarded.  You've simply gained a new family member, and your mom has decided to chase after happiness and love.  You are BOTH winners in this scenario!  It's just gonna feel a little awkward at first.

First of all....welcome back,my friend! It always seems a little more homey when you're here. Wink

Second,Indy is quite right,dear. It will be a bit strange at first but you are both definitely winners here. Plus how could he not get to know you and not be crazy about you? Smile
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Yes,I'm fine....as long as I don't look too closely.
Ed, Ego and Superego
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« Reply #4 on: October 01, 2012, 03:39:32 PM »

As a friend...
1) welcome back man!
2) You mom has raised you up and done a pretty good job of it.  Its her turn to have soem happiness.  I surely hope you can get on with her new husband.  I'm sorry you couldn't go.  You now have a choice, either deal with it or not.  At our age, you really don't want to lose your relationship with your mom over geography.

However this is an "OK to Pi$$, Moan and gripe zone".  Its good to have you back here
=Ed
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Quantum materiae materietur marmota monax si marmota monax materiam possit materiari?

Si Hoc Legere Scis Nimium Eruditionis Habes
Andrew
Administrator
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I know where my towel is.


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« Reply #5 on: October 01, 2012, 03:51:24 PM »

Welcome back! 

I can understand how mom getting married again would be awkward for you.  You should not feel discarded.  She is just following her heart about a spouse.  From my perspective, I love my wife and I love my children.  If I show love to one I am not forsaking the other.

And you always have a friend here.
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Andrew Borntreger
Badmovies.org
TheDope
Movie Reviewer And Professional Nit-Picking Geek
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Gone but not forgotten... well, KINDA forgotten.


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« Reply #6 on: October 01, 2012, 10:31:32 PM »

Never fret, Trevor.  Parents are parents; who can understand them?  You'll always have a family here that cares for you - underwear and all.   TeddyR
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TheDope: bringing the conversation to a grinding halt since 2002.
Trevor
Uncle Zombie and Eminent Shitologist
B-Movie Kraken
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Posts: 22708



« Reply #7 on: October 02, 2012, 01:17:21 AM »

You're looking at it altogether wrong, Trevor.  You have NOT been discarded.  You've simply gained a new family member, and your mom has decided to chase after happiness and love.  You are BOTH winners in this scenario!  It's just gonna feel a little awkward at first.

Thanks, Indy.

"A little awkward" is putting it mildly: I have no idea what this man is like despite having spoken to him several times already (not face to face) but Mom seems happy.
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I know I can make it on my own if I try, but I'm searching for the Great Heart
To stand me by, underneath the African sky
A Great Heart to stand me by.
Trevor
Uncle Zombie and Eminent Shitologist
B-Movie Kraken
*****

Karma: 2121
Posts: 22708



« Reply #8 on: October 02, 2012, 01:19:59 AM »

Oh Trevor.  I'm so sorry to hear you felt that way (past tense intentional), even momentarily.

This place - Badmovies.org - has always reminded me of Spider Robinson's Callahan's Saloon (and not just for the puns). The main point being what is known as Callahan's Law (also known as the Law of Conservation of Pain and Joy): "Shared pain is lessened; shared joy, increased"  I know you have found the truth of the first part here just as I know you have the heart for the second.  Sharing your mom's life and affections with someone she loves can only increase the happiness around all of you.  It's OK: your family just got bigger.  

*HUG*  Smile
Logged

I know I can make it on my own if I try, but I'm searching for the Great Heart
To stand me by, underneath the African sky
A Great Heart to stand me by.
Trevor
Uncle Zombie and Eminent Shitologist
B-Movie Kraken
*****

Karma: 2121
Posts: 22708



« Reply #9 on: October 02, 2012, 01:23:57 AM »

First of all....welcome back,my friend! It always seems a little more homey when you're here. Wink

Second,Indy is quite right,dear. It will be a bit strange at first but you are both definitely winners here. Plus how could he not get to know you and not be crazy about you? Smile

Thanks, Tracy *HUG*.

Apparently, according to Mom, he is quite nervous about meeting me as I have made it clear to her that this relationship will not have my blessing until I meet and talk to him in order to see if his intentions are honorable in every way. Now that their relationship is something more, I guess I have to accept it but he must still know that if he hurts her in any way at all, I will find a way to harm him irreparably.
Logged

I know I can make it on my own if I try, but I'm searching for the Great Heart
To stand me by, underneath the African sky
A Great Heart to stand me by.
Trevor
Uncle Zombie and Eminent Shitologist
B-Movie Kraken
*****

Karma: 2121
Posts: 22708



« Reply #10 on: October 02, 2012, 01:25:40 AM »

As a friend...
1) welcome back man!
2) You mom has raised you up and done a pretty good job of it.  Its her turn to have soem happiness.  I surely hope you can get on with her new husband.  I'm sorry you couldn't go.  You now have a choice, either deal with it or not.  At our age, you really don't want to lose your relationship with your mom over geography.

However this is an "OK to Pi$$, Moan and gripe zone".  Its good to have you back here
=Ed

Thanks Ed: the idea of Mom being married is something I have to get used to as I just want the best for her but right now, I hurt like all hell because of what has happened.
Logged

I know I can make it on my own if I try, but I'm searching for the Great Heart
To stand me by, underneath the African sky
A Great Heart to stand me by.
Trevor
Uncle Zombie and Eminent Shitologist
B-Movie Kraken
*****

Karma: 2121
Posts: 22708



« Reply #11 on: October 02, 2012, 01:29:05 AM »

Welcome back! 

I can understand how mom getting married again would be awkward for you.  You should not feel discarded.  She is just following her heart about a spouse.  From my perspective, I love my wife and I love my children.  If I show love to one I am not forsaking the other.

And you always have a friend here.

Thank you, sir.

There are more pros than cons in this situation (Mom is in love, she's got a guy who loves her and can look after her, she will be going back to her birthplace eventually, most of her family is there etc) but I really hurt like hell.
Logged

I know I can make it on my own if I try, but I'm searching for the Great Heart
To stand me by, underneath the African sky
A Great Heart to stand me by.
Trevor
Uncle Zombie and Eminent Shitologist
B-Movie Kraken
*****

Karma: 2121
Posts: 22708



« Reply #12 on: October 02, 2012, 01:30:22 AM »

Never fret, Trevor.  Parents are parents; who can understand them?  You'll always have a family here that cares for you - underwear and all.   TeddyR

I may be feeling bad but those last few words....  BounceGiggle TeddyR

My undies are one of the cons I mentioned in my reply to Andrew.  Buggedout Wink
Logged

I know I can make it on my own if I try, but I'm searching for the Great Heart
To stand me by, underneath the African sky
A Great Heart to stand me by.
alandhopewell
A NorthCoaster In Texas
Frightening Fanatic of Horrible Cinema
****

Karma: 341
Posts: 3157


Hey....white women were in season.


WWW
« Reply #13 on: October 02, 2012, 01:59:35 PM »

    Glad to have you back!
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If it's true what they say, that GOD created us in His image, then why should we not love creating, and why should we not continue to do so, as carefully and ethically as we can, on whatever scale we're capable of?

     The choice is simple; refuse to create, and refuse to grow, or build, with care and love.
Allhallowsday
B-Movie Kraken
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Karma: 2280
Posts: 20725


Either he's dead or my watch has stopped!


« Reply #14 on: October 02, 2012, 11:16:08 PM »

It's good.  You'll see.  Love is the answer.   Smile
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If you want to view paradise . . . simply look around and view it!
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