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Author Topic: RATING THE STAR WARS MOVIES---Before I See Rogue One.  (Read 685 times)
ER
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« on: December 18, 2016, 11:52:55 AM »

Worst to Best So Far...

I know others will disagree, that's fine, I'm just saying this is my take on it all. Still these movies are sacred cows to many, calling up memories of good times in life, and all I can say going in so iconclastically as I do is I have a bad feeling about this.

7. The Force Awakens. JJ Abrams should be stopped before he destroys again! He tricked us on Lost, he then jumped to the big screen where he ripped off Spielberg, Roddenberry, and Lucas, ruining everything he touched, yet he's supposedly a creative genius? Seriously, how did so many people get fooled into thinking this was a good movie? (Or that the prequels were that bad?) Here, I agree with every word said in this critical breakdown of why TFA is such a terrible movie. Seriously, check it out, it's brilliant.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8g9cJ5WKZeU

6. Return of the Jedi. Predictable, trite, pandering, a marketing tool for merchandise. From Luke's infamously misplaced kick to a blatantly bored Harrison Ford, this was a sad follow-up to two very good movies.

5. Attack of the Clones. More bland than bad, but....okay, yeah, pretty bad, I take that back. But it did have its redeeming moments, Jango Fett v. Obi-wan on storm-churned Kamino? Good stuff. Too bad the rest contained so many wince-worthy silly scenes. Also the romance between Amidala and Anakin....well the scene where they were sitting in the flowery field looked like it oughta be on a tampon commercial.

4. The Phantom Menace. It's hard for me to trash this movie because I associate seeing it with happy times, but, yeah, it was not that good. The pod race went on too long, Darth Maul was underused, too much blahblahblah about trade negotiations, but Qui-Gon was good, Ewan McGregor's homage to Alec Guinness was spot-on, and the phantom menace himself, Palpatine was darn sinister in his guise a meek public servant. I loved the look of some of the locations, and it was nice to see everyone so cheerfully happy at the end. I feel like there's some point of criticism I'm leaving out but...meesa can't think of it.

3. Revenge of the Sith. Something that ticks me off is when the misinformed pedantically complain that one weakness in the prequels as opposed to the original trilogy is the prequels were all CGI and had no hand-built sets. In truth (as the video I cited up there under TFA points out) the prequels, especially ROTS used all sorts of hand-built, physical world sets. The dark overtones in ROTS were not all CGI but often came from some very interestingly-created set constructions that would have done the silent movie era proud. But in lumping ROTS in with The Phantom Menace and handing out a blanket conviction that the entire prequel trilogy were garbage is short-sighted, because this was a Star Wars movie that held its own, from the epic battles among Force-users, to the last shots, to the sheer magnitude of the material it covered, Lucas was not cranking out a dud here, and even though it is the in thing now to rag on the prequels, I think in time a certain respect will be handed out to this particular installment. The opera scene gave me chills, and the acting here was better than in most of the other films. The subtle silent heaviness of heart that was conveyed when Anakin and Amidala, separated by distance, each worried about the other while gazing out windows on Coruscant was touching. Much moreso than any supposed feelings Han and Lei showed one another.

2. The Empire Strikes Back. Most people say this was the best of the series. Was it? Maybe, the walkers were amazingly cool, Yoda made his appearance, Cloud City was like a mall in a sky, Luke's paternity took many off guard, and we all fantacized about putting our math teachers in carbonite. (Um, we all did, right? Right....?) But I think the sheer impact of A New Hope (which I'll just call Star Wars, if you don't mind) has to command greatest respect. Empire was a lot of fun and was a high water mark in the series. The special effects improved greatly, the acting was better than it had been three years earlier, and there wasn't a bad scene in the run time. There are more moments to cheer for here than in any other movie in the canon. And yet I ranked it second...because you gotta respect a trailblazer, and that's what 1977's Star Wars was.

1. Star Wars (Yes, yes, it's PC to call it A New Hope, so sue me.) If this movie does not set your imagination soaring while making your spirit swell, you're as dead as those Jawas. The beauty of this story is its timelessness. take away the space ships, the light sabers, the blasters, and you could have a plot that'd fit into the Old West, the Dark Ages, or Shogunate Japan. Gilgamesh himself conquered similar quests millennia ago. But you know what, it's still all the cooler for having those things, light sabers, Jedi, the Death Star. I was born a year after this movie came out, but I can only imagine the impact of a special effects-laden superfilm transporting universal legends and themes into long-ago space had on the collective mind. The staid old sci-fi of Saturday mornings may have found the ultimate tribute in Star Wars, but they were never going to be the same either. Nothing was, This was the blockbuster to define all future blockbusters, a movie that changed society, that entered the international consciousness of humanity. And that's why 1977's Star Wars will always be at the head of the line, no matter what comes down to the multiplex in the age of Disney.


Oh, sure, I could belittle plot holes the size of X-Wings, but....the Star Wars films command respect just for what they are and shall continue to be, they've entered the popular culture, and they've brought excitement to us all.



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bob
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« Reply #1 on: December 18, 2016, 12:47:03 PM »

you forgot the Holiday Special
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ER
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« Reply #2 on: December 18, 2016, 01:44:18 PM »

Naw, wasn't a movie, just felt as long as one.
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« Reply #3 on: December 18, 2016, 03:45:27 PM »

Other than your inexplicable hatred for THE FORCE AWAKENS, I agree overall with you placement.
I put TFA around 3rd or 4th overall - but, to each their own.
I hope you like ROGUE ONE.
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« Reply #4 on: December 18, 2016, 04:51:26 PM »

For me it's

STAR WARS > EMPIRE STRIKES BACK > FORCE AWAKENS > RETURN OF THE JEDI > ATTACK OF THE CLONES > REVENGE OF THE SITH > THE PHANTOM MENACE.

Never thought I'd see a Star Wars list with PHANTOM MENACE not at the very bottom!
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« Reply #5 on: December 19, 2016, 07:56:34 AM »

My ranking would be Empire Strikes Back > Star Wars > Force Awakens > Revenge of the Sith > Return of the Jedi > Attack of the Clones and finally Phantom Menace.
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Skull
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« Reply #6 on: December 19, 2016, 09:55:59 AM »

I like Star Wars and Empire Strikes Back. Return of the Jedi has a few good moments; though I really wish there was more with Boba Fett and less ewoks. How does the evil empire control the universe if they cannot stop small fuzzy cavemen armed with rocks and sticks.

Star Wars was an awesome film that Lucas didn't think would go beyond that movie. The novel version was ghost written and sometimes I think the Star Wars script was ghost written, too. From my understanding Lucas rewrote Star Wars 5 times, and the 1977 movie that was being made, was still not the finished script, because writer Alan Dean Foster had no idea of Han Solo and Chewbacca when he wrote Splinter of the Mind's Eye in 1978, which was supposed to be Star Wars 2. What made Empire Strikes Back work was that Lucas was not the script writer and the story took parts from Splinter of the Mind's Eye.

The series started to slide down hill when the intent was not to tell a story but market toys. It started with the Ewoks.


As for Phantom Menace and the other two Star Wars; I hate all 3 of them, I would expect this crap from Ed Wood if he was given money, but to call these movies serious film making was mind blowing. So I just don't have the heart or the time to invest in more 'big budget' crap. Oddly but I have not seen Force Awakens (and the political stuff I've been hearing makes me not want to see the film) and I don't feel any urge to see Rogue One.


OMG - the remastered Star Wars totally suck ass!!! Greedo shots first? Han walks around Jabba (which shows that Jabba was never supposed to be a fat slug)... Sorry I hold no respect for the Star Wars remaster version.






« Last Edit: December 19, 2016, 10:05:46 AM by Skull » Logged
bob
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« Reply #7 on: December 19, 2016, 03:43:31 PM »

1 A New Hope

2 The Empire Strikes Back

3 The Force Awakens

4 Return of the Jedi

5 Revenge of the Sith

6 The Phantom Menace

7 Attack of the Clones

8 The Holiday Special
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« Reply #8 on: December 19, 2016, 05:05:04 PM »

I like the original trilogy, though I thought Return of the Jedi was a weak entry. The rest of them -- meh.

I remember watching The Force Awakens and feeling uncomfortable the whole time. I had serious problems with how it all seemed too slick and the fact it was little more than re-hashing the original film.

Then I watched that Youtube video ER linked in the original post, and it was as if someone clarified everything that made me uncomfortable while watching the film. While I don't agree that The Force Awakens is the worst film, it certainly didn't rekindle my love for the series.

I just hope Rogue One is a solid film as I can't put much faith in the glowing reviews of Star Wars fans anymore.
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Skull
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« Reply #9 on: December 19, 2016, 06:19:16 PM »

I like the original trilogy, though I thought Return of the Jedi was a weak entry. The rest of them -- meh.

I remember watching The Force Awakens and feeling uncomfortable the whole time. I had serious problems with how it all seemed too slick and the fact it was little more than re-hashing the original film.

Then I watched that Youtube video ER linked in the original post, and it was as if someone clarified everything that made me uncomfortable while watching the film. While I don't agree that The Force Awakens is the worst film, it certainly didn't rekindle my love for the series.

I just hope Rogue One is a solid film as I can't put much faith in the glowing reviews of Star Wars fans anymore.


LOL... I used to be a Star Wars fan... I'm not sure what frosted me the most, little vader making C3-PO, the army of the Fetts, or the battle on lava. Sure the battle on lava looked cool but it would make more sense to me if the characters were 'superman.'  Way too unrealistic for creatures that are supposed to be 'human'

Thanks... you confirmed my feeling toward 'The Force Awakens.'
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« Reply #10 on: December 22, 2016, 10:32:24 PM »

no love for this?

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« Reply #11 on: December 23, 2016, 08:50:03 PM »

Now that I've seen Rogue One, I'll list from best to worst ...

The Empire Strikes Back
This is still the best of them all.  Everything about it expands and enriches the Star Wars Universe, from characterization, to plot revelations, to Yoda explaining a little bit more about the Force, to meeting some of Han's old friends.  Even C3PO gets a couple of good dramatic moments, for once.

Rogue One
Yep.  The newcomer takes the #2 spot.  We learn a lot more about the Rebellion and the Empire from this movie, plus we get to see regular people fighting and dying for what they believe in.  People the movie has made us care about - not faceless guys who only get one close up before their X-Wing explodes, not purpose-built, disposable clones - but people we've come to have an investment in, die.  That gives Rogue One more balls than any other entry except Empire, which ended on an almost total bummer.

Revenge of the Sith
Huh?  What?  Yes, I enjoy this one more than either of the other two classic movies.  It has awesome actions scenes, General Grievous, that fantastic scene in the opera house with Palpatine and Anakin, probably the best score of all the Star Wars movies, and more than a few scenes with genuine, emotional impact.  When Yoda feels the Jedi dying, I feel it, too.  Yes, Padme dying in childbirth is stupid, at least as stupid as "Martha!" from Batmurderer vs. Sitsonhisassman, and "Nooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo!" is probably even worse.  That those two unforgivably awful scenes can't sink this further than #3 might tell you how much I enjoyed the rest of the movie.

Star Wars
Nothing to say here, really.  Just an awesome movie.

The Phantom Menace
Darth Maul's scenes, the underwater monsters, and the droid vs. Gungan battle is good enough to put this above RotJ.  It was pretty close, though.  Any scene with Anakin is downright painful.  For the record, I actually like Jar-Jar.

Return of the Jedi
Jabba's Palace is good.  Yoda's last minutes are good.  The scenes on the Death Star are good.  The huge space battle at the end is good.  Vader turning on the Emperor is GREAT.  The fight above the Sarlaac pit is not good.  Endor is not good.  Given that this is technically the "last" movie, those disappointments are magnified all out of proportion because there won't be any more movies to fix them.  Teddy Bears defeating the Empire is just going to have to be what we're stuck with.  The Phantom Menace has some bad parts - and how! - but it was the first, so there were going to be at least two other movies to get over it.

Tie:
The Force Awakens Attack of the Clones
Attack of the Clones is just a bad movie.  Almost nothing in it works.  However, The Force Awakens is an astonishingly lazy movie, which may be worse.  At least George Lucas was trying.  J.J. Abrams couldn't even be bothered to establish why Rey, the very linchpin of the new series, can do anything she does.  "Yeah, she can fight, and pilot a space freighter, and use the Force, all without any training.  Why?  Meh, I dunno, the Force wills it, or something."  I'm not going to be watching either of those again any time soon, if ever.
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« Reply #12 on: December 23, 2016, 09:25:17 PM »

What is Star Wars?
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« Reply #13 on: December 24, 2016, 12:05:05 AM »

What is Star Wars?

Something that allows nerds to feel superior to everyone else, I think.
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« Reply #14 on: December 24, 2016, 12:57:23 AM »

All my best wishes to Carrie Fisher and hopes for a speedy recovery.
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