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October 25, 2014, 07:40:11 PM
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Badmovies.org Forum  |  Movies  |  Bad Movies  |  BadMovies.org: The Movie « previous next »
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Author Topic: BadMovies.org: The Movie  (Read 2533 times)
A.J. Bauer
A German Expressionist and a
Frightening Fanatic of Horrible Cinema
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Karma: 179
Posts: 2492



« on: October 02, 2013, 05:19:42 PM »

Write a terrible script for a movie!  But all of the characters have to be members of the forums!

A fool by the name of Andrew read a line from Necronomicon. This unleashed an eldritch abomination that lays waste to all it sees. To redeem himself and save the world Andrew collects a team of bad movie enthusiasts to seal the monster away.

Trevor - A film archivist with a knowledge of the worst and most obscure cinematic turds.
TrekGeezer - A hardcore Sci-Fi fan armed with a functional Star Trek phaser.
RC Merchant - A tough as nails vampire (Who drinks RC cola instead of blood) that can club fifty eldritch monsters with a baseball bat before he brushes his teeth.
Rev. Powell - A steadfast and stern leader of the group.
A.J. Bauer - A young college student with anger issues and a massive collection of My Little Pony fanfiction.
Indiana Smith - A daring archaeologist that is not to be confused with that other archaeologist.
LilCerberus - An expert spy who has only been caught ten times in one mission!
Jack - He drives the SUV on weekends. Without Jack the heroes couldn't operate at all! Thanks to Jack they're saving the world SAT-SUN! (Only 8 seats, everyone else gets stuffed in the trunk)
Derf - Torn apart by an SMG before the movie started.

Together they must use their combined knowledge to send the monster Uwe'wood'andergoth back to it's eternal prison under the deepest depths of Hollywood.
« Last Edit: October 06, 2013, 09:07:25 AM by A.J. Bauer » Logged

Flangepart
Frightening Fanatic of Horrible Cinema
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Karma: 356
Posts: 6600



« Reply #1 on: October 02, 2013, 05:23:43 PM »

Uwe'wood'andergoth...

Sir, you have written your own Hackmaster/D&D monsterpedia entry.
  TongueOut

The film opens in an abandoned movie theater...


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"Aggressivlly eccentric, and proud of it!"
A.J. Bauer
A German Expressionist and a
Frightening Fanatic of Horrible Cinema
****

Karma: 179
Posts: 2492



« Reply #2 on: October 02, 2013, 09:55:59 PM »

Uwe'wood'andergoth was a joke on the weird long names H.P. Lovecraft would give to eldritch abominations.

The "goth" part coming from Shoggoth. The rest was the names if bad directors.

Uwe Boll, Ed Wood, Paul W.S. Anderson.

Sadly I forgot Michael Bay.
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LilCerberus
A Very Bad Person, and
Frightening Fanatic of Horrible Cinema
****

Karma: 209
Posts: 2873


fake wine, fake accent


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« Reply #3 on: October 02, 2013, 10:00:17 PM »

Can I be in it?
I'd make a great lurker whose disguise sticks out like a sore thumb!  TeddyR
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"Science Fiction & Nostalgia have become the same thing!" - T Bone Burnett
Normal is what people are until you get to know them.
http://www.wrir.org      http://www.youtube.com/LilCerberus      http://www.facebook.com/LilCerberus      http://www.facebook.com/pages/Absolutely-Als-Bag/235489689811513      http://lilcerberus-ob.blogspot.com/   https://plus.google.com/109856182158905164403
indianasmith
Archeologist, Theologian, Elder Scrolls Addict, and a
Frightening Fanatic of Horrible Cinema
****

Karma: 1405
Posts: 8247


A good bad movie is like popcorn for the soul!


« Reply #4 on: October 02, 2013, 10:58:50 PM »

Your script needs a daring archaeologist/religious mystic who can dig for arrowheads, leap across narrow gorges, read ancient texts, understand Roman politics of the late Republic and early empire, and he needs to have very sexy nostrils.

Sound like anyone you know?
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"Carpe diem!" - Seize the day!  "Carpe per diem!" - Seize the daily living allowance! "Carpe carp!" - Seize the fish!
"Carpe Ngo Diem!" - Seize the South Vietnamese Dictator!
A.J. Bauer
A German Expressionist and a
Frightening Fanatic of Horrible Cinema
****

Karma: 179
Posts: 2492



« Reply #5 on: October 02, 2013, 11:00:16 PM »

Your script needs a daring archaeologist/religious mystic who can dig for arrowheads, leap across narrow gorges, read ancient texts, understand Roman politics of the late Republic and early empire, and he needs to have very sexy nostrils.

Sound like anyone you know?

Alan Quartermaine?
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Jack
Frightening Fanatic of Horrible Cinema
****

Karma: 1047
Posts: 9571



« Reply #6 on: October 03, 2013, 06:39:49 AM »

You guys are gonna need transportation and I've got an SUV that seats 8.  Well it's my wife's actually, but I have full use of it.  On weekends.
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"Whenever you find yourself on the side of the majority, it is time to pause and reflect." - Mark Twain
SynapticBoomstick
Cinematic Monster Fanatic from Weird New Jersey
Bad Movie Lover
***

Karma: 84
Posts: 755


One monster with extra cheese, hold the plot.


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« Reply #7 on: October 03, 2013, 08:05:37 AM »

And one of the dark artifact related to Uwe'wood'andergoth could be called the Yew Bowl.
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Kleel's rule is harsh :-B
Flangepart
Frightening Fanatic of Horrible Cinema
****

Karma: 356
Posts: 6600



« Reply #8 on: October 03, 2013, 08:13:31 AM »

And one of the dark artifact related to Uwe'wood'andergoth could be called the Yew Bowl.
But for heavens sake, don't flush it!
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"Aggressivlly eccentric, and proud of it!"
JayJayM12
Regulary relieves himself on hospitality...
Bad Movie Lover
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Karma: 85
Posts: 658



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« Reply #9 on: October 03, 2013, 10:56:09 AM »

I can craft service the crap outta this thing for you guys!  (can't be THAT hard to learn how to cook, right?)
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Check out my movie reviews and articles at:  http://www.influxmagazine.com/category/contributors/jason-howard

Or, don't check them out - see if I care.  You're not my real mom anyway.  Unless, you are.  In which case, whatever, I'll do what I want.  It's my hot body.  Y'all don't know me.
Doc Daneeka
Tako Luka tuna fever!
Frightening Fanatic of Horrible Cinema
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Karma: 160
Posts: 1814


I want to eat a tuna!


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« Reply #10 on: October 03, 2013, 11:26:54 AM »

"I've watched Hip Hop Locos thrice. I've seen the end of Super Hell 2 and can forsee the beginning of Super Hell 3. I have nothing left to live for, but trust me, I can buy you some time. Save yourselves."
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Get out da' waaaaaaaayyy, octopus comin' through!
Chainsaw midget
Just Another Guy
Frightening Fanatic of Horrible Cinema
****

Karma: 256
Posts: 1872



« Reply #11 on: October 03, 2013, 11:31:06 AM »

Quote
This unleashed an eldritch abomination that lays waste to all it sees. To redeem himself and save the world Andrew collects a team of bad movie enthusiasts to seal the monster away.
You forgot about the part where the abomination leads an evil army ripped straight from the depths of hell.  ... "Hell" in this case simply meaning "some of the worst movies imaginable." 

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Flangepart
Frightening Fanatic of Horrible Cinema
****

Karma: 356
Posts: 6600



« Reply #12 on: October 03, 2013, 12:48:31 PM »

Ah, but who would lead this 'army'...I can see Manos as the Commendant of B-stalag 13...but who is the Commander of such a rag tag band of heckraizers?
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"Aggressivlly eccentric, and proud of it!"
Jack
Frightening Fanatic of Horrible Cinema
****

Karma: 1047
Posts: 9571



« Reply #13 on: October 03, 2013, 01:25:36 PM »

"I've watched Hip Hop Locos thrice.

This man could stare into the face of death and laugh  BounceGiggle
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"Whenever you find yourself on the side of the majority, it is time to pause and reflect." - Mark Twain
Rev. Powell
Global Moderator
B-Movie Kraken
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Karma: 1798
Posts: 14552


Click on that globe for 366 Weird Movies


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« Reply #14 on: October 03, 2013, 02:14:45 PM »

I demand to have a nude scene. This is a horror movie, after all.
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"The best parts are watching Sly go through the full range of emotions: deadpan, deadpan with raised eyebrow, deadpan with quivering lip. There's also a great sequence where Sly drives his VW Beetle down the interstate for about 20 minutes, staring dramatically through the windshield.."-Joe Bob on A MAN CALLED RAMBO
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