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July 30, 2014, 04:33:41 AM
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Author Topic: NURSE  (Read 447 times)
Javakoala
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« on: April 12, 2014, 06:22:33 PM »

Remember when someone posted this trailer, and everyone thought it looked like it had potential?

NURSE 3D Movie Trailer (2014)


No. Just plain NO! I just finished watching this wreck. Lead actress comes across as though she is stoned. The story is non-stop cliche after cliche. Even the unusually rampant nudity could not distract me from wishing the movie would end.

And I don't want to ruin the film for anyone who wants to watch this, so I'll just say that the lead character's motivation is wildly inconsistant, and this undermines the whole thing rather early on.

Oh, yeah, and the 3D was basically not even there, much like DRIVE ANGRY. Or maybe they just need to put the 3D version on its own disc. Right now I can't decide which gave me the bigger headache: the 3D glasses or the movie itself.

I'm lying. It was this stupid effin' movie!
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fulci420
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« Reply #1 on: April 12, 2014, 09:15:06 PM »

I too thought the trailer looked promising... I made it probably less than 20 minutes into this I cant put my finger on exactly what I hated about it but it sure was unpleasant. Avoid!
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akiratubo
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« Reply #2 on: April 12, 2014, 09:39:50 PM »

I didn't want to see it because I have less than no desire to the see the lead actress naked.
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Javakoala
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« Reply #3 on: April 12, 2014, 11:21:48 PM »

I didn't want to see it because I have less than no desire to the see the lead actress naked.

She's not unattractive, but she can't seem to act. That, and...well, she looks like she needs to eat.
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MrMari
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« Reply #4 on: April 15, 2014, 10:30:17 AM »

That was me who posted the trailer originally. The movie never made it to the theater in my home town so I had to download it. I was already familiar with Paz de la Huerta from Boardwalk Empire so I knew about her monotone acting style and it didnt really bother me. I saw the movie recently and I actually enjoyed it.
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messedup
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« Reply #5 on: April 16, 2014, 12:01:46 PM »

That was me who posted the trailer originally. The movie never made it to the theater in my home town so I had to download it. I was already familiar with Paz de la Huerta from Boardwalk Empire so I knew about her monotone acting style and it didnt really bother me. I saw the movie recently and I actually enjoyed it.
I agree...had a good time with it.
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Javakoala
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« Reply #6 on: April 16, 2014, 04:09:38 PM »

That was me who posted the trailer originally. The movie never made it to the theater in my home town so I had to download it. I was already familiar with Paz de la Huerta from Boardwalk Empire so I knew about her monotone acting style and it didnt really bother me. I saw the movie recently and I actually enjoyed it.

You, sir, are a far more forgiving person than I am. And I enjoy the Monkees' movie, Head.

I will say that this was far better than SUCKER PUNCH, but given my distaste for that movie, I guess that isn't saying much.
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lester1/2jr
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« Reply #7 on: April 20, 2014, 08:10:57 AM »

Here's my review


Nurse - This is the movie that's like Single White Female and the nurse who narrates talks slowly and weirdly. Whether you love it or hate it, it's a constant distraction. I could sort of go with it but I can see how it would just be really annoying. It has one of my favorite cliches: Everything goes to Hell in a hand basket when person A arrives but no one says "Hey, has anyone noticed everything's gone to hell in a hand basket since Person A arrived?" Of course not, instead they gravitate towards that person! This is not even close to the only time you're asked to suspend your disbelief here.

If William Castle was still alive he would enjoy this. It's a total camp fest. The spotty acting and lassitude in the logic is made up for with nudity and gore. there's a record amount of people who didn't see the last scene so they still believe the bad guy is the good guy...I don't know what you call it. Again though, the overwhelming defining feature here is it's the one with the narrator with the ostentatiously slow talking speed. It's a fun bad movie 4/5

I hated the comic relief head nurse
« Last Edit: April 20, 2014, 08:33:03 AM by lester1/2jr » Logged

Javakoala
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« Reply #8 on: April 20, 2014, 01:17:41 PM »

Here's my review


Nurse - This is the movie that's like Single White Female and the nurse who narrates talks slowly and weirdly. Whether you love it or hate it, it's a constant distraction. I could sort of go with it but I can see how it would just be really annoying. It has one of my favorite cliches: Everything goes to Hell in a hand basket when person A arrives but no one says "Hey, has anyone noticed everything's gone to hell in a hand basket since Person A arrived?" Of course not, instead they gravitate towards that person! This is not even close to the only time you're asked to suspend your disbelief here.

If William Castle was still alive he would enjoy this. It's a total camp fest. The spotty acting and lassitude in the logic is made up for with nudity and gore. there's a record amount of people who didn't see the last scene so they still believe the bad guy is the good guy...I don't know what you call it. Again though, the overwhelming defining feature here is it's the one with the narrator with the ostentatiously slow talking speed. It's a fun bad movie 4/5

I hated the comic relief head nurse


A fair review, except I wouldn't give it 4 out of 5. It asks too much and gives WAY too little in return. I've watched scenes of the lead actress on Boardwalk Empire and she CAN act, though in a limited capacity. She refuses to do even that little in this movie. I was hoping for fun. I got diddly in return. And I have incredibly low standards! Seriously! Bill And Ted's Excellent Adventure is one of my favorite movies of all times! THAT should tell you something.
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I have been told that I crap on everything everyone else loves. Just be thankful I can't give you an Oklahoma Nipple Twist through the Internet.
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