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Badmovies.org Forum  |  Other Topics  |  Off Topic Discussion  |  We have toilets in South Africa! « previous next »
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Author Topic: We have toilets in South Africa!  (Read 2941 times)
Trevor
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« on: April 30, 2014, 01:52:21 AM »

I have been asked twice in as many weeks by clients "Are there toilets in this building?" and "Do you have toilets here?"

Choose from the answers below:

1) Yes, they're that way. Past the Nukie costumes, leftover carts from Space Mutiny and discarded masks from The Demon and you'll find them.  Wink

2) Yes, follow me and I'll show you.

3) No, we pee in a bottle and sell it as Red Bull.  Drink TongueOut

4) No, we do our #2 on the lawn and fertilize it that way.

5) No, we do everything in a bucket and sling it out the window.  Buggedout
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I know I can make it on my own if I try, but I'm searching for the Great Heart
To stand me by, underneath the African sky
A Great Heart to stand me by.
Derf
Crazy Rabbity Thingy
Proofreader
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Lagomorphs: menace or underutilized resource?


« Reply #1 on: April 30, 2014, 07:11:35 AM »

Or you could just show them your undies and say, "Does it look like we have toilets in this building?!?"  Buggedout
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"They tap dance not, neither do they fart." --Greensleeves, on the Fig Men of the Imagination, in "Twice Upon a Time."
Trevor
Uncle Zombie and Eminent Shitologist
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« Reply #2 on: April 30, 2014, 07:47:15 AM »

Or you could just show them your undies and say, "Does it look like we have toilets in this building?!?"  Buggedout

 BounceGiggle TeddyR TeddyR
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I know I can make it on my own if I try, but I'm searching for the Great Heart
To stand me by, underneath the African sky
A Great Heart to stand me by.
Flangepart
Frightening Fanatic of Horrible Cinema
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« Reply #3 on: April 30, 2014, 08:36:53 AM »

Trevor's Undies: The easiest way to shut down a conversation...or a lunch.
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"Aggressivlly eccentric, and proud of it!"
Trevor
Uncle Zombie and Eminent Shitologist
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« Reply #4 on: April 30, 2014, 08:57:00 AM »

Trevor's Undies: The easiest way to shut down a conversation...or a lunch.

End the former, lose the latter.  Wink
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I know I can make it on my own if I try, but I'm searching for the Great Heart
To stand me by, underneath the African sky
A Great Heart to stand me by.
BoyScoutKevin
Frightening Fanatic of Horrible Cinema
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Karma: 277
Posts: 5030


« Reply #5 on: April 30, 2014, 05:06:59 PM »

Trevor's Undies: The easiest way to shut down a conversation...or a lunch.

End the former, lose the latter.  Wink

Trevor, we know that you have toilets in South Africa, as we call them outhouses here in Texas, but tell us, Trevor, do you have washing machines in South Africa, or do you still get your undies clean by beating them between two rocks?
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LilCerberus
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Quis custodiet ipsos custodes?


« Reply #6 on: April 30, 2014, 05:11:00 PM »

 TeddyR FINALLY!  TeddyR
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Flangepart
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« Reply #7 on: April 30, 2014, 05:20:59 PM »

 or do you still get your undies clean by beating them between two rocks?...

There's an image that did register as intended!  Buggedout
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"Aggressivlly eccentric, and proud of it!"
BoyScoutKevin
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« Reply #8 on: May 10, 2014, 05:07:22 PM »

A politican in South Africa only has to promise 3 things to the voters to get elected to public office.

1st. A chicken in every pot.
2nd. A car in every garage.
3rd. An outhouse behind every house.

There is the problem of Trevor and his undies, but no South African politican has ever come up with a solution to that.

Burn 'em, and they pollute the air.
Bury 'em, and they pollute the soil.
Dump 'em in the ocean, and they pollute the water.

No, seemingly, the only solution is for South Africa to develop its own space program, and launch 'em into space. So far that they'll never come back to earth. For if they do come back to earth, they won't burn up in re-entry, but land on some ofher poor, beknighted country, and wars have been fought over less.

Of course, there is also the solution that'll make Trevor and his undies the most famous South African of the 21st century, as we shoot him and his undies toward Mars, so that when he and they land on the Red Planet, he and his undies will be the first man and his undies on Mars. He'll also be the Martians problem.

Of course, there was that incident during the first half of the 20th century. The incident called The War of the Worlds. We always wondered how that war got started. I think we now know.
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VenomX73
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« Reply #9 on: May 10, 2014, 05:35:31 PM »

Quote
4) No, we do our #2 on the lawn and fertilize it that way.

and grow shiitake mushrooms  Twirling
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Gilligan's island, Goonies and Godzilla information booth here!
BoyScoutKevin
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« Reply #10 on: May 17, 2014, 05:12:37 PM »

Thinking about that poor boy scout in "Lair of the White Worm," I realized what good advice Trevor has given us over the years. For if it had been him picked up by that strange woman in her strange car and taken to her strange home, since he never takes off his undies, she'd never have gotten him into the tub for her "love bite" to happen. And if she had fed him to her pet white wyrm, which she keeps in the cellar of her home, without the requisite bath, as soon as it tasted his undies, which have never been changed since time immemorial, it'd have spit him right back up and then looked for a place to wash out its mouth. So, if you are ever in the U.K. never ever change nor take off your undies,  and you too may live to see tomorrow like Trevor.

Also good, if you are ever in the U.K., for fending off . . .
zombies -- werewolves -- vampires -- space aliens -- promoters and proponents of all forms of human sacrifice -- hounds from Hell -- ghosts -- and all things that go bump in the night.

And if you do not have a pair, Trevor will send you a pair. Only $9.95 or its equivalent in South African rand + shipping and handling. Arrival in 6 to 8 weeks.
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RCMerchant
Bela
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« Reply #11 on: May 17, 2014, 07:13:41 PM »

Geez-I thought the flush thing was a hand washer-I been p**sing in the sink! Buggedout
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"Supernatural?...perhaps. Baloney?...Perhaps not!" Bela Lugosi-the BLACK CAT (1934)
Interviewer-"Does Dracula ever end for you?
Lugosi-"No. Dracula-never ends."

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Bushma
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« Reply #12 on: May 17, 2014, 11:16:57 PM »

Playing devil's advocate here, could they have meant public toilets?  I've been to several places where they did not have public restrooms.
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