Dark Alex's Really Long Post Thread.

[Alex]

[indianasmith]

I can't make out a word of that. . .

[Trevor]

I can't make out a word of that. . .

I think that's the formula which will enable me to wash me undies 

[Alex]

I was hoping it would be a bit larger. Still, the full screen version I have is both awesome and funny.

[Alex]

Loving this collage Kristi put together.

[Alex]

Decided on a change. Going to do a new profile pic too. I've not been feeling as dark as I used to be for a couple of years now.

Fatherhood has made you soft! 

How Men’s Bodies Change When they Become Fathers

Hint: They don’t just get ‘dad bods.’

By Anna Machin

    June 13, 2019

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CreditArmando Veve

As an anthropologist who studies human fatherhood at the University of Oxford, I’ve run up against a widespread and deeply ingrained belief among fathers: that because their bodies haven’t undergone the myriad biological changes associated with pregnancy, birth and breastfeeding, they’re not as biologically and psychologically “primed” for caretaking as women are.

As a result, they feel less confident and question their abilities to parent: Will they be “good” parents? Will they bond with their babies? How will they know what to do?

As my own personal and professional experiences dictate, the idea that fathers are biologically “less prepared” for parenthood is unlikely to be true. Much of the role of parenting is not instinctual for anyone. (I remember the steep learning curve of those first days of motherhood — learning what each of my baby’s cries meant, mastering the quick diaper change and juggling the enormous amount of equipment necessary just to make it out the door.)

And while the biological changes fathers undergo are not as well understood (nor as outwardly dramatic) as those of mothers, scientists are just beginning to find that both men and women undergo hormonal and brain changes that herald this key transition in a parent’s life.

In essence, being a dad is as biological a phenomenon as being a mom.
Testosterone seems to dip

Take testosterone, the stereotypically “male” hormone that plays important roles in male fetal development and puberty. Testosterone is largely responsible for motivating men to find partners and, studies suggest, men with higher levels of testosterone tend to be more attractive to potential mates. But being a successful human father means focusing inward on the family and resisting the drive to seek out another partner. So, experts believe, men have evolved for some of that testosterone to go.

In a pioneering five-year study published in 2011, for instance, Dr. Lee Gettler, Ph.D., an American anthropologist, followed a group of 624 single, childless men in the Philippines from age 21 to 26. Dr. Gettler found that while all men in the study experienced normal, age-related dips in testosterone, the 465 men who became dads during that five-year period experienced a more significant drop — an average 34 percent (when measured at night) — than those who remained single or married.

Globally, study after study — including my own unpublished findings in the United Kingdom — have found similar results, noting that this reduction in testosterone can happen just before and just after the birth of a man’s first child. And while it isn’t clear exactly what prompts this drop, Dr. Gettler said that his own preliminary results suggest that the more dramatic the drop, the bigger effect it seems to have on a man’s caregiving behavior. “We found that if brand new fathers had lower testosterone the day after their babies were born,” said Dr. Gettler, “they did more caregiving and baby-related household tasks months later.”

While news of this drop in testosterone is often greeted with groans of resignation from men — choose fatherhood and choose the road to emasculation, they think — some studies have suggested that the lower a man’s testosterone, the more likely he is to release key reward and bonding hormones, namely oxytocin and dopamine, when interacting with his child. Caring for your child, therefore, produces not only a strong bond but a neurochemical reward, inducing feelings of happiness, contentment and warmth — a welcome trade-off.
Brains seem to change

The brain also appears to undergo structural changes to ensure that fathers exhibit the key skills of parenting. In 2014, Dr. Pilyoung Kim, Ph.D., a developmental neuroscientist at The University of Denver, put 16 new dads into an M.R.I. machine: once between the first two to four weeks of their baby’s life, and again between 12 and 16 weeks. Dr. Kim found brain changes that mirrored those previously seen in new moms: Certain areas within parts of the brain linked to attachment, nurturing, empathy and the ability to interpret and react appropriately to a baby’s behavior had more gray and white matter between 12 and 16 weeks than they did between two and four weeks.

Dr. Kim believes this bulking of the brain reflects a ramping up of the skills associated with parenting — such as nurturing and understanding your baby’s needs — and the inevitably steep learning curve that both new moms and new dads have to surmount. In particular, because men do not experience the hormonal surges that accompany pregnancy and childbirth, “learning how to emotionally bond with their own infants may particularly be an important part of becoming a father,” Dr. Kim suggested. “The anatomical changes in the brain may support fathers’ gradual learning experience over many months.”

But while both new mothers and new fathers show activation in the brain regions linked with empathy and understanding their child’s emotional state and behavioral intentions, a 2012 study by neuroscientists at Bar-Ilan University in Israel suggested that the parts of the brain that light up the most are startlingly different for each parent. For moms, regions closer to the core of the brain — which enable them to care, nurture and detect risk — were most active. But for dads, the parts that shone most brightly were located on the outer surface of the brain, where higher, more conscious cognitive functions sit, such as thought, goal orientation, planning and problem solving.

Dr. Shir Atzil, Ph.D., the psychologist who led the study, believes — along with Dr. Kim — that dads’ brains have adapted in similar but different ways to ensure that they can bond with and care for their babies, despite not having given birth to them. Meaning both mothers and fathers are primed to “demonstrate similar levels of motivation and attunement to the infant,” said Dr. Atzil.

Beyond this, the differing areas of brain activation may reflect a difference in role, and different but equally strong attachments, between mothers and fathers. It is a cliché that children run to Mom for a hug when they’re hurt, while Dad is the “fun” parent. But evidence suggests that mothers and fathers get different neurochemical “rewards” after certain parenting behaviors, eliciting these differences in stereotypes.

Dr. Ruth Feldman, Ph.D., a social neuroscientist based in Israel, published a study of 112 mothers and fathers in 2010 which found that peaks in oxytocin (and by association, dopamine) occurred for women when they nurtured their children. In contrast, the peak for men occurred when they took part in rough-and-tumble play. Because young children’s brains seem to mimic the same oxytocin levels as their parents’ — meaning they’ll get a similar blast of feel-good oxytocin when playing with Dad and when being nurtured by Mom — they’ll be more likely to engage in that behavior over and over again specifically with that parent, which is critical to their development. Rough-and-tumble play not only cements bonds between father and child, but also plays crucial roles in a child’s social development.

There are, of course, many questions still to answer in the relatively new field of the biology of fatherhood. After 10 years of study, we now need to replicate our findings on larger and more diverse groups. But if I get the chance, I tell new fathers that evolution has primed them to parent just as it has primed women. Biology has their back.

[Alex]

Getting my backlog of metal mini's painted up currently. Hopefully I can then get started on my plastics. And if that ever happens, might want to send some heaters down to hell, 'cos it must be damn cold down there.

Going to speak to work about some leave. We have decided to go over to the States next Spring instead for Halloween.

[Alex]

Last day at work before I have two weeks of blissful leave. Spending the first week with Kristi and Ash, then the second week with friends over from the States.

No doubt I'll get to add to my tally of lost American's I have tracked down and rescued. I am confident that I have rescued more US citizens from being lost in our village than any other person in Scotland.

Dealing with a guy from another department who wants to change one of our processes and can't seem to understand that there are good reasons why we have to do things in the way we do and there are higher ranking people who 'own' the way we do things. They want them done that way because if we don't then if planes crash it is then that person potentially facing prison and this is how they manage the risks involved.

Missed you lot while the board has been down. Had to get up to all sorts of mischief to keep myself otherwise amused. I don't think Kristi has been as amused by me as I have been. Did at least get plenty written on my novel though. Got over the 30,000 word mark and I am aiming to make it 90,000 to 100,000 words.

Wonder if I'll actually try and get it published. There aren't many jobs I think of that I'd enjoy more than being a successful author. And if that doesn't happen (and I am not expecting it to if I am entirely honest), well I've had fun writing it.

Bally has put in his PVR, so we've successfully broken another SNCO.

1473 days left in my job. In 1473 Copernicus was born. Later on this would irritate a lot of religious bodies. The first complete printed edition of Avicenna's The Canon of Medicine (Latin translation) is published in Milan. The Battle of Otlukbeli took place and Ottoman Sultan Mehmed II defeated the White Sheep Turkmens, led by Uzun Hasan. Maybe they should have tried called themselves something a bit more fearsome than the White Sheep. Hardly going to intimidate the foeman there with that one. Newfoundland might have been discovered by Didrik Pining and João Vaz Corte-Real. The Almanach cracoviense ad annum 1474 is published in Poland.
The city walls and defensive moat are built in Celje, Slovenia. Marsilio Ficino becomes a Catholic priest. Recuyell of the Historyes of Troye is the first book to be printed in English, by William Caxton and Stephen the Great of Moldavia refuses to pay tribute to the Ottomans. This will attract an Ottoman invasion resulting in 1475 in the greatest defeat of the Ottomans so far. I guess that was a good call on his part then. The Ottoman's really seemed to have a thing for invading Europe and never seem to have made it past Vienna.

[Trevor]

Missed you lot while the board has been down. Had to get up to all sorts of mischief to keep myself otherwise amused. I don't think Kristi has been as amused by me as I have been. Did at least get plenty written on my novel though. Got over the 30,000 word mark and I am aiming to make it 90,000 to 100,000 words.

Wonder if I'll actually try and get it published. There aren't many jobs I think of that I'd enjoy more than being a successful author. And if that doesn't happen (and I am not expecting it to if I am entirely honest), well I've had fun writing it.

While the board was down, I managed to get all my books and DVDs/tapes sorted.

I wrote a book a few years back called My Life In Underpants Or How Being A Zombie Isn't A Bad Living   actually, called Riding The High Wind, about the SA film industry's history from 1895 to the present day: I should go see publishers about it.

[Alex]

Missed you lot while the board has been down. Had to get up to all sorts of mischief to keep myself otherwise amused. I don't think Kristi has been as amused by me as I have been. Did at least get plenty written on my novel though. Got over the 30,000 word mark and I am aiming to make it 90,000 to 100,000 words.

Wonder if I'll actually try and get it published. There aren't many jobs I think of that I'd enjoy more than being a successful author. And if that doesn't happen (and I am not expecting it to if I am entirely honest), well I've had fun writing it.

While the board was down, I managed to get all my books and DVDs/tapes sorted.

I wrote a book a few years back called My Life In Underpants Or How Being A Zombie Isn't A Bad Living   actually, called Riding The High Wind, about the SA film industry's history from 1895 to the present day: I should go see publishers about it.

Maybe we should get the forum to go down for a few days every month so we can get other stuff done. :P And you should see about getting it published. All the forum members who manage to get a book in print could form their own secret society, where we come up with elaborate plans to bring the earth under our domination! I am sure I still have my list of potential volcanic island evil genius lairs somewhere around here...

[316zombie]

trev, you should contact scholastic, i bet they'd be interested. 

[Alex]

Ok so tonights game has a very simple but potentially very deadly situation for the party to deal with.

A tiny bit of common sense is all the is required to negate the danger.

To put it simply the party have to take a short swim. If they try to do it wearing armour, well in most things it takes a lot to kill someone in D&D but drowning can do it in three rounds.

Given this, I would not be surprised if we have a new character in the next game.

Speaking of games I am getting very frustrated with Civ 6. No matter how many times I play it, I don't seem able to get any iron within my borders which makes warfare for a substantial part of the game damn near impossible. Even just defending my cities from barbarian hordes is pretty much impossible. I suppose I could trade for it, but it is just very irksome that it is always the same resource I am short of.

Kristi is going to church today and taking Ash so I'll be getting some stuff sorted around the house, make sure everything is heading towards shipshape for our visitors. No idea why I should make the house ship shaped, but there you go. Apparently, society requires houses to be boat-shaped to receive guests.

I have a sudden and very random urge to listen to Lawnmower Deth. Specifically their cover of 'Kids In America'. Feel free to listen along if you are similarly grabbed by such an urge.

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I should finish the back garden but I really can't find any part of me that want's to engage in that task.

[Alex]

So in tonights D&D game, the party came across some meat that was obviously poisoned (hanging in a larder). The wizard decided to eat some (raw) anyway and almost died. There were a lot of dead bodies lying around, many of which had been poisoned and he let his raven feed on one of the bodies so that nearly died too.

They were looking for the hidden entrance to a Drow camp. They came across a pool of water that had an illusion cast on it to make the water look tainted and unhealthy. It also had a number of dead Drow bodies lying around it, some floating in the water, others lying half in and half out of the pool and others still who had died fleeing from the pool. The discovered the illusion but decided they wanted to walk past it and go exploring deeper into the Underdark rather than investigate the pool (something that would have been disastrous for them as they'd have ran into a full-on Yuan-Ti army.

Next time I need a neon sign with a big arrow announcing "This way to the bad guys!"

[Alex]

Been tidying up the house for a few days now trying to sort out various things. It's getting me down that once I've finished one area, go do somewhere else and come back that the first place is a mess again and I feel like I have made 0 progress. Getting a bit soul destroying.

Een wip maken as the Dutch would say.

Been trying to find The Unnamable Returns online to watch, but one version looks like it was filmed through a screen door and the other, the soundtrack sounds like everyone has inhaled a lot of helium. Bugs me that I had films like this on VHS and can't watch them anymore. How many times are you expected to pay for the one (not very good it has to be admitted) movie? Watching Cthulhu Mansion instead (not one I've seen before ) which I think will have less to do with Cthulhu than even your average Stewart Gordon adaptation. The joys of 80's horror. Maybe I should just go for something classy like Hollywood Chainsaw Hookers.

I really need to pick up a copy of Peter Jackson's magnum opus, Bad Taste.

Wonder if trump really did call off a strike on Iran? Doesn't seem right to me that anyone who has dodged serving their country should be allowed to send others to war. Oh well, not my country and until something kicks off I'll only pay a limited amount of attention. Even then unless we get involved there is a limit to what I can do. Got other priorities on my mind these days.

Hey, did you know there is a real-life serial killer on screen in The Exorcist? He is reckoned to have killed 6 women and was only convicted of one murder. He is out of prison now. Kinda think serial killers should be an automatic life sentence myself. Doubt any of the people campaigning for their release and that they should be given a second chance ever lost a loved one to them. The amount of rich and influential folks who tried to get Mira Hindley out of jail is something I just can't understand. Hopefully, she did die in prison and it wasn't just some cover up so they could give her a new identity.

[Alex]

Not put up any pictures of this little guy for a while. I think this photo was taken about 21:30ish when he wouldn't sleep and yes it can be that bright at that time of night up here. Anyway, when he can't sleep we take him for a walk and give him a shot on the swings and then he'll settle down a lot easier. He likes to go to bed hyper and nods off much quicker.