Dark Alex's Really Long Post Thread.

[Alex]

Went for a couple hours sleep this afternoon. My knees and elbows are feeling stiff while my armpits feel swollen. It doesn't feel painful enough to be the 'flu though. As usual when I feel ill and anyone's attempts to look after me or make a fuss just irritate me, so I may lock myself in the man cave until I feel better.

I also have an urge to watch "9 deaths of the ninja". I know I've seen the film, although I remember nothing about it bar the title. Going to move the bedroom around tomorrow and then build up the cot. This also entails me and Kristi switching what side of the bed we sleep on.

Hmm, feeling light headed. Curious. I also have vague notion to watch some weird Korean film I saw years ago. Some woman (I think she can't speak and/or is deaf), works selling stuff to fishermen beside some lake. There is a rather disturbing scene where she tries to kill herself (any ladies reading this might want to skip the next part and go straight to the next paragraph) by putting a fistfull of fish hooks up her vayjayjay and then ripping them out. Wonder if that would hurt more than that scene from Antichrist?

Fortunately I don't actually own a copy of it to watch, or I'd be wondering what the hell I was thinking tomorrow.

Aren't I a bundle of joy tonight? Kristi says I look like Darth Sideous with my housecoat on and the hood up over my head. Oh well I guess that is better than Max telling me I look like Oddjob from Goldfinger.

I have a random urge to go find Kristi and cuddle her. I tend always to go with these random urges. Although I am waiting until the song I am listening to finishes (the Motorhead cover of David Bowie's Heros. Can't help but feel it is far superior to the original as much as I like Bowie).

Before I got sent home from work the topic of disussion had been stories from doing guard duty. Specifically had you ever had to chamber a round while on the front gate. Just to explain things a little, you have to deal with a whole variety of situations when on guard duty, most of which become funny stories to tell later on, although at the time they can be pretty serious. Turned out none of us had ever found ourselves in a situation where we felt it had gotten that out of control that we had to take that step. I have to say though, when you cock your rifle, that chunk-chunk noise you make as you pull the cocking handle back and let it slide forward should be the last word in any argument. If I had to that on the gate, I think I'd feel like I'd failed a bit, unless I am in a very extreme situation. Even the time a drunk guy tried to grab my weapon off me, where everyone thinks I should have used my rifle butt to smash him in the head I dealt with it simply by pushing the guy away with one hand and keeping my other hand on the pistol grip.

Plenty of other situations where I get to make ready, hell I even got to fire on full automatic once (three round suppression bursts, when you go on automatic you are generally looking at keeping other peoples heads down rather than shooting them, well unless you are at close quarters in which case pray and spray works pretty well). That's more a special forces thing though than what I get to do generally anyway. Plus I hate the standard issue NATO 5.56mm round. I'd much rather have the old 7.62mm SLR. Now there was a rifle. You could use it to paddle a boat, dig a trench with the butt as your spade, and the thing would still fire no problem. Plus if you shot someone they went down and stayed down. Damn heavy and you could carry less ammo, but then you needed less. It was too big and heavy for women to carry and everyone in NATO decided to use the same caliber rounds, so now we have the SA80. Oh well, I digress.

Heard two jokes today, but since the one is racist and the other isn't suitable for polite company I can't really tell either of them, which is a shame because despite both of them being very wrong and non-PC did make me laugh (in a I should not be laughing at this, but I can't help it sort of way).

Having a debate with Kristi at the moment. She thinks she should sleep downstairs and I should get the bed since I am running a fever now apparantly. I say she should have the bed and I'll sleep downstairs because she is heavily pregnant and needs to be resting in the bed. Pretty sure I'll win this one. If I put on my sad eyes and stare at her, she normally gives in.

Oh well, enough random ramblings. Good night everyone, whatever you are.

[ER]

Aw, tell them, Alex, as the late, great Joan Rivers said, "It's comedy you f**king twats!"

[Alex]

Lol, if you really want I'll PM them to you.

[Alex]

Feeling better today, which is good since about 1am this morning I was considering taking myself up to hospital. Kristi was hoping I'd still be feeling blergh, so I could phone in and get a few more days off. Caused a panic when she got up and saw the rabbits weren't in their cage and the lid was open, but I'd been up early and put them in their run outside.

Kristi is heading into town today (everytime I am off work ill she always has a prior appointment elsewhere. I have not yet decided if she picks those days to go out to avoid being around me when I want to be left alone, or if I pick the days I know she is going to be going out to be off ill so I can have peace and quiet). Still it is better than my brother in law Marc who passes out when he gets a fever. His wife has found him a few times collapsed on the floor. Looking forward to seeing all of them when they come over in April / May time for the baby blessing. Hopefully the weather will be a bit gentler than that time of year in want to be in these parts. While she is out I'll get work done. I've given up trying to do things when she is in the house as she'll constantly interupt me for cuddles which my OCD really hates. Just let me get the work done and I'll cuddle you all you could ever possibly want.

Going to watch The Cloverfield Paradox while I wait for her to go out, see if it is any good.

Managed to get the windows cleaned though despite plantive wails for guess what... cuddles! Poor woman. I hope these iron pills help sort her out.

[Alex]

Had the thought that the reason I was so ill yesterday came down to the mental image on Maggie Thatcher naked that Inhumanly Tall Dave put in my head. Saw the Hollywood Vampires are playing Glasgow so I must contact Concerts Dave and see if he wants to go along with us if I can get the time to go see them.

Kristi gave me my anniversery present early, the new albuim from Phil Campbell & The Bastard Sons. Given the band is actually made up from Phil's boys I can see why his wife is so upset at that name. She also got me the new Blade Runner, but dystopian or post apocalypic stuff tends not to be her bag so I'll watch that myself when she is busy.

Everyone here has been going on about a show on Netflix called The End Of The f**king World. I sat down to watch it, and just couldn't bring myself to like it or hate it. It was just on. Going to stick with it though until the end of the season.

[Alex]

After feeling fine yesterday I got up early to go to work and found myself again having to run to the toilet 3 times in half an hour. Figured since I was supposed to do earlys this week I should go in and make sure someone else was covering them as they expected me back in today. Went into work, Inhumanly Tall Dave was there, so told him I'd need to go sick again and turned around and walked home.

I guess it shows that despite how cynical I have became about my work, I still have some standards, and thats a good thing right?

Done a phone appointment with a nurse, off work until Monday and if I am still ill by the weekend go straight to hospital. Went from feeling ok when I got in the house to suddenly "Oh I am just going to sleep". Still feeling tired now, but I refuse to spend all day in bed. However I think attending Kristi's antenatal class with her today is off the cards as I have no wish to pass this on to a bunch of women all in the later stages in pregnancy.

Oh well I guess I should write some more. Continue the adventures of MÁrten and his fellow condettori, and while Kristi is out I can watch Blade Runner.

[Alex]

When it comes to cats I am with Mark Twain and HP Lovecraft.

Aah cats. Possibly the most evil little buggers on the planet, but we love them.

I wonder why? Is it because they are cute and adorable. I mean if they looked like toads would they still be kept as pets as much? Somehow I doubt it. I remember watching an old movie where a guy (I think it was Peter Cushing), plans on publishing a book showing how cats are secretly in control of the world. The cats use their mind control powers to get the publisher to destroy the manuscript and then kill the author in an ambush.

Still I wouldn't ever do without them.

Dagon has developed the ability to teleport. I can leave him in the man cave, close seven doors between me and him as I go through the house and yet when I turn around he is silently sitting there staring at me. If he could I swear I'd be worried about him wearing a hocky mask and carrying a machette.

Ever played the Friday 13th game where Jason can teleport around. That is Dagon.

When the revolution finally happens, I for one will welcome our new feline overlords. Although we are pretty safe until some daft bugger invents cat food that they can open themselves. Then when they have no more use for us... Not in flames with the end of human civilisation come, but with meows and hisses.

[Alex]

Rabbits, now there is a creature I am less a fan of. Offhand I cannot think of any famous historical figures who had great or even things to say about them. They aren't even great as a food source as you can eat as many of them as you want and you'll still die of starvation as many trappers found to their cost historically. When you get down to it, even Bugs was not a nice guy. And he had a terrible sense of direction. Wonder if he ever once managed to take the correct turn at Albuquerque? Don't be fooled by that cute fur and twitchy noses.

Earlier on this week I was taking Kristi's rabbit outside to their pen. Normally I'll go up to them, put my hand in the cage in front of them, let them sniff it and get used to me being there. I'll talk to them soothingly and then pick them up carefully. At which point said rabbit will start kicking and scratching leaving me with lots of bleeding cuts. Anyway, this particular morning I was in a hurry and just grabbed a rabbit in each hand and took them outside. When the rabbits inevitably started kicking, they were kicking each other instead of me.

Later on that night I brought them in the same way and again they kicked each other rather than me. Next morning I did the same thing and all of a sudden no more kicking. So much for treating them with kindness.

I swear sociable predators make better pets than vegetarian ones.

Hmm, come to think of it I tend to be the same way about houseguests.

Although I'd have to quantify that a little and say I've only had one vegetarian houseguest. She neither showered or bathed the entire week she stayed with us, complained about us feeding our other houseguests bacon and expected someone else to stay home and look after her dogs when ever we were all going out somewhere. She was the one person out of that group who did not receive an invite back to our house, although she attempted to invite herself on several occasions until I started a big argument with her and now she doesn't speak to me anymore. But nonetheless I shouldn't judge all of them by her standard.

[Alex]

Decided to try posting pictures up in here finally, so here goes.

This is me sleeping with my pet axe.



This is either my little brother, or a Bee Gee.



And this is me with the biggest blister I've ever had. You might not want to look at it while eating though.

[Alex]

So Sharknado 5 is on Netflix. I guess I'll be watching that with my good lady later.

I know most people prefer dogs to cats but I am the other way around, although I do like dogs (well I like medium to large dogs, small ones I find yippy and annoying). I mean they are fine if you want something that is generally going to give you unconditional love (as long as you remain top of the pack), but I prefer the more independent attitude of a cat to a slobbering subordinate dog. My favourite breeds tend to be Golden Labs, Alsations and Huskies.

I did have a girlfriend who had a Pyranesian Mountain Dog, which was bred to protect livestock from bears and was of a size to match. She didn't put any time or effort into training him though and he kept trying to hump my friend Garry whenever he came round. Although Garry is pretty tall, the dog was bigger than him so I didn't argue with it, until it started growling one day at me. Figured I could not have an animal that large thinking it was anywhere but bottom of the pack, so I jumped on it and pinned it to the floor holding him there by the neck (without hurting him) until he stopped struggling. After that I had no more problems with him, although he would growl at his owner and her family still.

Was looking into getting a pet dog, but I figure with a cat and a baby on the way we have enough to worry about.

Got our bedroom rearranged last night and the cot (or crib depending on what you call them), built up. I am liking how the bedroom looks now.

[Alex]

Kristi and Cato are away out to Inverness to see Hairspray tonight, since I got them tickets as a christmas gift.

Yay for the joys of having the house to myself. Got the laundry done, some of the windows washed and general tidying up stuff carried out.

So who here has had a stalker? Had one myself for a few years (somewhere between 5 or 6). It is incredible how someone you may totally not care about can be so obsessed about you in return. Every little thing you do must in some way be concerned with them and connected to them without exception. Eventually I got rid of her with a combination of either ignoring or publicly humiliating her. This was only a cyber stalker though. I'd tried being nice and telling her i didn't want her back in my life nicely, then I tried being a bit more blunt and still she just wouldn't give up. She'd try, and I'd tell her where to go to, so she'd go off and say whatever about me on social media as if in some way this would hurt me and then I'd get peace for a little while and then she'd try again. The humiliation bit, well that was whenever she came on posting something about me, I'd turn it around and make it about her instead.

Funnily enough it was the ignoring her that got the biggest reaction though. When I started that, she apparently went ballistic (I deleted her posts on Bebo and put a message saying "This post with deleted without being read." I can quite believe the stories I heard from mutual friends about an animal howl of rage. She tried complaining to my work who told her to bugger off, so she then tried the police who I guess told her the same thing because I never heard anything from them either. But for years nothing I could do could possibly not in some way be all about her. She'd come up with fantastical connections about it too.

There are all sorts of levels of stalking from the full on going around your house type, to the much less dangerous ones like I had to deal with.

Never had a stalker? Hmm, perhaps have you been a stalker then? have you ever found yourself obsessing over someone else while denying it loudly to the world? Taking an unhealthy interest in someone elses doings and even when they aren't around it preys on your mind? Maybe you have entered the rejection phase and keep on blaming this person for everything. Yup, you are a stalker then.

Other random stuff for today. Well I watched a couple of decent horror movies and now I seem to have ran out of new ones to watch. So instead I am going back to 80's sci fi where films were directed by Charles Band and the music by Richard Band. Starting with Arena and then I'll see where it goes from there.

[ER]

 Hmm, perhaps have you been a stalker then? have you ever found yourself obsessing over someone else while denying it loudly to the world? Taking an unhealthy interest in someone elses doings and even when they aren't around it preys on your mind? Maybe you have entered the rejection phase and keep on blaming this person for everything. Yup, you are a stalker then.

Good PSA, Alex!

[Alex]

So today is our 5th wedding anniversary. Wow, who'd have ever thought I'd meet a woman who would put up with me for 5 years?

Didn't do as much as we have in previous years, mostly because of me being ill last week and not getting anything organised, but I am looking at doing something this weekend to make up for it. Kristi cooked me a lovely dinner of slow cooked pork loin done in a BBQ sauce.

What she decided to have for herself... well she wanted Pepperoni Pizza (she craves it while pregnant). The only other thing she is craving is alcoholic, so she can't have that anyway. And besides she doesn't drink alcohol much anyway. I mean maybe three or four times all the while I've known her.

Although her first alcoholic drink was a couple of hours after meeting me for the first time. Make what ever you want out of that one.

I did manage to get Kristi flowers (I still don't understand why women like decaying organic matter. I mean would one feel the same way if I dug up a dead cat and presented it to them? Mind you with my regular choice in woman, yes would be a distinct possibility) and chocolates. We went out for a moonlight stroll, although not too far as there is only so far you can go with an 8 month pregnant woman before you need to head back home.

Kristi wants to cuddle up tonight and watch season 6 of Grimm. It's ace having a fellow geek for a wife. I never have to worry about going to see the latest rom-com.

Making arrangements for Kristi's younger brother and his wife coming over. Work has some flats that I can rent super cheap to put people up in for a while, so booked them in for a week. Its only a ten minute walk from our house. At the moment the grandparents on both sides get priority on places in our house, and we are going to have Kristi's mum over for three weeks and my mum and sister coming up at the same time so things might get a little crowded.

Holy crap. Just heard that one of my nephews (eight years old) in the states got frustrated when his friends wouldn't play the game he wanted to play so he told them that he was going to go get all his savings, buy a gun and shoot them. His parents aren't sure where he has picked this up from (they don't own any guns themselves). I can only imagine the talk his dad is going to be having with him when he gets home from work.

[ER]

Happy anniversary, Alex! May you love as long as you live.

[Alex]

Went to give blood today, but since I had been ill last week they couldn't take it until next week. Oh well, at least I made the effort although part of me thinks if you want my blood you should damn well pay me for it. That stuff doesn't grow on trees y'know.

Well unless its the trees in my D&D campaign... but that is something I still need to update on that thread.

So today I have 1966 days left in my job.

Lets see what was happening in 1966, although since I wasn't born yet my memories of this time are at best vague.

In this year cigarette packets were first forced by law in the US to carry health warnings. In Spain the first Jewish child was born since they'd been cleared out in 1942. Wow. Batman, Dark Shadows, The Monkees and Star Trek all premiered on TV. Coup's were popular this year as they happened in Burundi, Indonesia, Uganda, Ghana, Burundi, Syria (twice), Nigeria (also twice), Central African Republic and Upper Volta. Lots of satellites were launched in the US and USSR (Luna's 9, 10, 11 and 13) Venera 3 (first man made object to hit Venus. Hmmm, I wonder if Venus has intelligent life on it? I bet if it does we crashed right into the temple of V'hurbnick the Lumbagious and they are really p**sed at us now and ever since have been planning war on mankind. Speaking of this how stupid are we to send out something like Voyager out there with handy things like how many people there are on our planet, what languages we speak, our DNA... I mean if I was some alien warlord and I received that kind of info I'd be like "Perfect, I know where they are, how many and how to use biological warfare to wipe them all out. I mean seriously people!), Saturn 1, Gemini 8 & 9 & Explorer 3.

In other news, the church of Satan was founded as was the Black Panthers. The Rolling Stones released "Paint it black". The Beatles decided they were more famous than Jesus and to be fair, I can name more number one chart hits of theirs than by Jesus so they may or may not have had a point? The 55th German F-104 Starfighter crashed. Over one hundred German pilots would die flying that aircraft earning it the nickname The Widowmaker.

One for our resident South Africans here. The number of people banned in South Africa reached 936 under various laws as were records by The Beatles. I don't know if that was connected to them selling more albums than Jesus or not though.

In Vietnam, North Vietnamese troops overran a Green Beret camp in Ashau Valley while in Wales a landslide caused by a waste material from a coal mine crashed into a school and killed 116 children and 28 adults. In New York in one day 400 people died from heart attacks and respiratory problems. That the city had its worst ever smog cloud which is believed to have caused the deaths. Ronald Reagan was elected governor of California and in these year we passed the general peace from the end of World War 2 became longer than the peace between World Wars 1 and 2, although I maintain that, that was really the same conflicts, but with a half time break to rearm and allow some people to switch sides. Of course, the specific peace wasn't so hot during those years as there were still plenty of other wars going on, just not a hot world wide one.

Lots of other stuff happened too, but they seemed to involve sports and I pay less attention to that stuff.