Dark Alex's Really Long Post Thread.

[Paquita]

What is a conker?

[Alex]

One of these.

[Alex]

I had a dream last night. Ever read the book 'I Am Legend'? Well, it was sort of that situation only the last surviving human was Indy and rather everyone else being vampires everyone else in the world had seen Jurassic World 2 except for him. It had went through the cinema and he hadn't been able to see it, every time he went to buy it on DVD it was sold out, and his internet connection was too slow to stream it online. He bought the book of the novel to try and at least read it, but the only copy he could find was written in Mandarin.

 

I haven't seen it yet either  

You mean you have the option to go see it, but just to torture Indy that little bit more you are going to sit there and say "Nah, not going to see it. Even though I could."

There are people in some parts of the world who are desperate to go see it and would really appreciate the options you have. Stop being so mean to poor Indy. Go see it before him! Then you can reassure him of how great it is and how much he needs to go see it thusly putting his mind at ease.

It would be selfish not to.

[indianasmith]

OK, get in all the teasing while you can.  I BOUGHT MY TICKETS TONIGHT!!!!!
Unless the theater burns down before 7 pm tomorrow, I am seeing this movie!!!

(Wait . . . why did I say that??  What if - oh snap!!)

[Alex]

I was thinking of all the ordinary things that could potentially go wrong with making it to the cinema. Your car might break down, there could be a power cut and the theatre has no electricity, as you said there could be a fire or an accident that blocks the route...

Really the odds of getting there seem to be about 1,000,000 to 1. 

[Trevor]

You mean you have the option to go see it, but just to torture Indy that little bit more you are going to sit there and say "Nah, not going to see it. Even though I could."

There are people in some parts of the world who are desperate to go see it and would really appreciate the options you have. Stop being so mean to poor Indy. Go see it before him! Then you can reassure him of how great it is and how much he needs to go see it thusly putting his mind at ease.

It would be selfish not to.

 

The cinemas here www.brooklynmall.co.za - the nearest ones to me - are screening it, but.................... I'm too lazy to go  

I see that they're screening it in 2D and 3D: nah, I'll wait for the 1D version 

[Alex]

Saturday morning rolls around once more. Went through to bed a little early last night (it isn't getting dark here until about midnight and gets light again about 1 or 2 am) to read some books I'd downloaded that have been sitting on my computer for a while now. If something peaks my interest I tend to be like that. I'll make a note of it, sit it to one side and come back to it later. For example one of the things I wanted for my Soviet army was a Katyusha rocket launcher. I've had it sitting there for I am not sure exactly how long, maybe a year and I am only just now getting around to building it up. In the case of the books it has only been a month or so, but it is books I've been wanting to read for the past 20 to 30 years.

Anyway, Kristi came through to bed in that short slice of darkness that passes for night here. From the way she was losing her balance I could tell she was pretty tired, but when she almost collapsed on top of Ash's cot I grabbed her, pulled her into bed and got her ready for bed lying down (no she wasn't drunk, she very rarely drinks and when she does its only one). Ash just wouldn't settle and she'd been sitting up with him. After getting her sorted I got Ash to drop off to sleep and when he woke up a few hours later persuaded him to go back to the land of nod by lying him on my chest. This generally works pretty well. I lay there until I figured it must be around 10 o'clock, the day was wasting and it was time to get out of bed.

Turned out to be 07:30.

Oh well, I can get on with things. We have people coming round today for board games, tomorrow there is a small comic con going on in the next town, so we'll be going to that. I hadn't planned on going while as much as I want to support it I felt at £28 a ticket it was overpriced (the big guest was in a couple of episodes of season one of Game of Thrones), however a friend won some tickets and gave us them, so we'll be going tomorrow after all.

The big news at work is that Shona the complainer has been posted out. I must admit to be mildly surprised when I felt my heart lift in joy at that news. We only have to put up with her until late September. I normally wait until I find out who is replacing someone before I get excited about things, but in this case apparently I am making an exception.

Anyway, finished painting up Kristi's M36 Jackson so she has some firepower capable of taking on my German big cats. My reinforcements for the Germans... well I have a Kubelwagon, which I have to admit I bought more because it is a cute looking vehicle rather than for its effectiveness. Rather than go with any of the standard camo paint patterns or even just a flat gray I decided to paint it black but with nazi symbols on the doors. It will make a suitable transport for their command squad and hopefully attract a lot of firepower that would otherwise be directed at more valuable targets.

Next up I am going to finish up painting my figure of Sir Christopher Lee in his WW2 days.

[Alex]

Went to the local convention today. It was decent I guess. I'd like to say it will grow and be bigger in years to come, but it was sold out and I am not sure where there would be a bigger venue locally.

Had Perry round last night and some guy called Ross who wants to join our D&D game. Played them at Axis & Allies. Perry took the allied side, Ross went Germany leaving me with Japan. We demolished the Soviet Union in pretty short order and generally overran Asia and the Middle East, then Perry conceded defeat. First time I've played that game for many years and I enjoyed getting it out again.

[Alex]

My burst of energy for painting is continuing and my slowly, bit by bit my backlog of work is getting cleared up. Still got work to do on these, but this is where the vehicles I am doing currently sit.

Going for a slightly Hollywood villain look for the Kubelwagon, although the crew will be painted up as Heer rather than Waffen. Not sure any of those cars were ever actually painted up that way during the war, but it says "bad guys car" to me. I don't really go to a huge amount of effort when painting. All of it could be done to a much higher standard but I am happy with this level of work on them. Might work in some green camo pattern onto the Jackson and a bit of weathering on the Katyusha.

[Alex]

Not sure how it ended coming up in conversation today, but apparently when I mentioned an ex-gf of mine while she had good looks, also had the body of a reversable ironing board. Apparently this was just about the funniest thing the other guys had ever heard.

Whatever works for them I guess. Oh, yeah I remember now. Someone was asking if they'd ever replied "No dear, its the fat that does that" in reply to being asking by their significant other if a dress made their bum look big, and somehow we got onto her from there. Jim want's to look up a picture of her now as he has the mental image of an ironing board with a head and limbs.

Pretty accurate description really. She did have those dark eyes and hair that was always a weakspot of mine.

Hopeless between the sheets though. Only woman I've ever sound sex boring with.

Oh well, that was many years ago.

Someone got into an arguement on Kristi's fb page about video games causing violence. I'd previously had an arguement with this guy. He was extremely pro-gun and so I pointed out the inconsistancy on his position and for other reasons called him out as a coward. I thought my point was proven when he didn't respond, however it did turn out that Kristi had unfriended him.

After we went to see Tradgedy live we decided to listen to some of Neil Diamonds music. Turned out that beyond his big hits we didn't like his music afterall.

Anyway, this guy I do like. Nothing wrong with a bit of Elvis.

! No longer available	Small | Large

Oh, forgot to mention. On Sunday I got into trouble from our friend Cat. Apparently telling her 5 year old to run up to strangers and do a puppy dog impression (lick them) is a bad thing. Who knew?

[Alex]

Woke up this morning. Ash was a bit gurney so picked him up to let Kristi sleep and took him through the man cave to feed him. Dagon had gotten out of the kitchen and been sick on the carpet, so had to put Ash down and go clean that up. Ash then had a nappy full of poop which I’d to change, after which I got him settled with a bottle and went for my morning shave. Emptied the cats litter tray, accompanied all the time to hearing Dagon yowling somewhere else in the house. Went to see what was up and found I’d been a bit slow cleaning his tray so he’d pee’d on the changing mat.

I guess there are worse places he could have done that.

Carefully picked up the changing mat and threw it in the shower. Swore at the cat.

Went to go iron a shirt, but could tell from the smell that the cat had filled his litter tray again, so went down stairs, changed that again and finally got my uniform ready. Ash had fallen asleep, so I carefully picked him up, put him in his cot before giving Kristi a goodbye kiss (carefully so not to wake her) and headed off to work.

Couldn’t help noting it was not yet half past seven and I’d already had to deal with pee, poop and puke. This does not bode well for how the rest of the day.

[Trevor]

Couldn’t help noting it was not yet half past seven and I’d already had to deal with pee, poop and puke. This does not bode well for how the rest of the day.

Story of my life right there 

[Alex]

Got this sent to my work email address.

Hi, viсtim.
This is my lаst warning .
I write yоu bесausе I рut а mаlwarе оn thе wеb pаgе with pоrn which yоu hаve visitеd.
My virus grаbbеd all yоur реrsonal info and turned on yоur cаmerа whiсh capturеd the prоcеss of yоur onanism. Just after that the sоft savеd yоur сontaсt list.
I will dеlete the cоmрromising vidео аnd infо if yоu раy mе 600 USD in bitсоin. This is addrеss fоr раymеnt: 1CGGwyi5hWgxM1GnxBa24ojjeyc3bzmMZi
 
I givе yоu 24 hours aftеr yоu oреn my mеssаgе fоr making thе transaсtiоn.
Аs soon аs yоu rеаd thе messagе I'll sеe it right аway.
It is nоt nесеssary to tеll me thаt yоu havе sеnt mоney tо me. This addrеss is сonnеctеd to yоu, my systеm will delete everything autоmatiсally after transfеr сonfirmation.
If you nеed 48 h just rерly оn this lеttеr with +.
Yоu can visit the policе statiоn but nobоdy саn hеlр yоu.
If yоu try tо dесеivе mе , I'll sее it right аwаy !
I dont live in yоur сountry. Sо they can not traсk my lоcаtiоn еvеn for 9 months.
Gооdbyе. Dоnt forget about thе shame аnd tо ignorе, Your lifе сan be ruinеd.

Now I don't find this ridiculous because of the spelling or grammer. Or even that we don't have web cams at work, so they wouldn't be able to turn them on and record me if I was to try something like this at work, or even because the net access controls at work would prevent me getting on something like that.

I find it ridiculous because our net access is so damn slow that the idea of trying to watch porn on it would be more frustrating than anything else lol.

[Trevor]

Got this sent to my work email address.

Hi, viсtim.
This is my lаst warning .
I write yоu bесausе I рut а mаlwarе оn thе wеb pаgе with pоrn which yоu hаve visitеd.
My virus grаbbеd all yоur реrsonal info and turned on yоur cаmerа whiсh capturеd the prоcеss of yоur onanism. Just after that the sоft savеd yоur сontaсt list.
I will dеlete the cоmрromising vidео аnd infо if yоu раy mе 600 USD in bitсоin. This is addrеss fоr раymеnt: 1CGGwyi5hWgxM1GnxBa24ojjeyc3bzmMZi
 
I givе yоu 24 hours aftеr yоu oреn my mеssаgе fоr making thе transaсtiоn.
Аs soon аs yоu rеаd thе messagе I'll sеe it right аway.
It is nоt nесеssary to tеll me thаt yоu havе sеnt mоney tо me. This addrеss is сonnеctеd to yоu, my systеm will delete everything autоmatiсally after transfеr сonfirmation.
If you nеed 48 h just rерly оn this lеttеr with +.
Yоu can visit the policе statiоn but nobоdy саn hеlр yоu.
If yоu try tо dесеivе mе , I'll sее it right аwаy !
I dont live in yоur сountry. Sо they can not traсk my lоcаtiоn еvеn for 9 months.
Gооdbyе. Dоnt forget about thе shame аnd tо ignorе, Your lifе сan be ruinеd.

Now I don't find this ridiculous because of the spelling or grammer. Or even that we don't have web cams at work, so they wouldn't be able to turn them on and record me if I was to try something like this at work, or even because the net access controls at work would prevent me getting on something like that.

I find it ridiculous because our net access is so damn slow that the idea of trying to watch porn on it would be more frustrating than anything else lol.

That's creepy.

I can write you a letter using the filthiest Afrikaans I know which you can forward: this idiot will probably think you're giving him a compliment. 

[Alex]

I did consider replying saying I don't have the money, but if you wait a week I can send you $10,000. Every week I'll send a new email offering more money if they just wait a bit longer and see how long I can string them along.